Shadowing Practice: Louis C.K. Monologue - SNL - Learn English Speaking with YouTube
B2
Ladies and gentlemen, Louis C.K.
225 sentences
If sentences are too short or too long, click Edit to adjust them.
1
Ladies and gentlemen, Louis C.K.
2
Thank you.
3
Thank you very much.
4
Thank you very much.
5
Oh, stop.
6
I...
7
Hi.
8
It's a little early for that.
9
Well, thank you very much for being here.
10
This is the 40th year of this show's existence,
11
and this is the finale,
12
so I'm very honored, honestly,
13
to be asked to host it.
14
So thanks, and I'm glad you guys are here.
15
Um, yeah, it's fine.
16
Anyway, uh...
17
I-I was born in 1967,
18
and so I grew up in the 70s.
19
So I'm not racist.
20
However...
21
I do have mild racism.
22
It's the best I could do coming out of the 70s,
23
because that was a very racist decade.
24
People said racist things all the time, and nobody got offended.
25
The only time somebody got offended if you said something racist in the 70s,
26
is when they would then say,
27
like, hey, you interrupted me.
28
I was saying something racist.
29
Why did you...?
30
But...
31
So I have mild racism.
32
It's benign.
33
It's not aggressive.
34
It's not even negative racism.
35
It's mild racism.
36
I'll give you an example, okay?
37
Like, see, like, if I go to a pizza place I've never been to before,
38
and it's run by four black women,
39
I'll go, like, uh, hmm.
40
See, it's very mild.
41
It's extremely mild racism.
42
I'll notice that.
43
Yeah.
44
You don't usually see that,
45
four black women running a pizza place.
46
Unless it's called four black girls pizza or something like that.
47
Like, that's the whole point of the place.
48
It's mild.
49
Here's another example of mild racism.
50
If I say I'm in a hospital,
51
and the doctor comes in to treat me,
52
and the doctor's from China or India,
53
I'll think, well, good, good.
54
Good, more of that.
55
Why not?
56
It's very mild racism.
57
Here's another example.
58
If I'm in a gas station late at night and a young man comes in wearing a hooded sweatshirt,
59
if he's white, I'll think, oh, he's an athlete.
60
If he's black, unless he has a big smile on his face,
61
then I become mildly racist,
62
and this is what I think.
63
I think, that's fine.
64
Everything's fine.
65
Nothing's gonna happen.
66
No, of course I'm fine.
67
Why did I even think that for a second?
68
This is because I was raised in the 70s.
69
The 70s were a very different time.
70
The 70s, everything was different in the 70s than it is now,
71
except the Middle East.
72
It's exactly the same.
73
It's exactly the same as it was in the 70s.
74
It's been the same fights, and you know what?
75
It's boring now.
76
That's the worst part of it.
77
When I was a kid,
78
we were like, ugh, but you can't go like this for,
79
like, a thousand years.
80
After a while, when you fight,
81
people don't care, because when you're just both,
82
you just keep fighting, everybody's like, those guys are dicks.
83
They just fight.
84
That's what it's like.
85
You know, like, I have two kids, and they fight sometimes.
86
And when they first start fighting, I get concerned.
87
I go in their room,
88
I'm like, hey, what's going on?
89
What's wrong?
90
Why are we having some feelings?
91
Can we.. can we listen to each other, please?
92
Can we please just listen to each other?
93
Okay, you go first, and then she goes, she's like...
94
Hmm, yeah, that sounds hard.
95
Okay, okay, thank you.
96
Thank you.
97
Okay, now you.
98
Because I like this one a little more, so I'm gonna...
99
And they work it out.
100
You help them work it out.
101
But if they keep fighting, you stop doing that.
102
After a while, you just go in the room and you just go, Hey!
103
Just shut up!
104
Fuck you!
105
You're both wrong!
106
Because he won't stop fighting.
107
You're in a family.
108
There's other people in this family,
109
and you're being a couple of selfish little bitches that won't fix anything.
110
You share a room, and we can't afford another room,
111
so just deal with it.
112
Somehow this has to do with Israel and Palestine.
113
I don't know exactly.
114
I don't remember how it was.
115
And it's because my kids are like Israel and Palestine.
116
And I'm like America.
117
The little ones like Palestine,
118
because she always gets screwed.
119
She gets the worst deal.
120
She's like, she threw a rock at my face.
121
I'm like, you're fine.
122
Look, you have a great life.
123
You take a rock to the face once in a while, you're fine.
124
The older one is like Israel.
125
She's like, Israel, she comes up to me,
126
she burnt all my dolls.
127
I'm like, look, I can't do anything about it right now.
128
Your sister is crazy.
129
Please don't make me talk to her.
130
I'll work it out, you and me, okay?
131
We'll go out.
132
I'll buy you a really cool missile,
133
and you do whatever you...
134
Whatever you do with it.
135
Totally up to you.
136
The 70s were very different.
137
In the 70s, there was a child molester that lived in my hometown.
138
And it wasn't a big deal.
139
It wasn't like, we caught a child molester.
140
It was just like, yeah,
141
that's the house where the child molester lives.
142
He lives where, hey, kids,
143
don't be stupid or you'll get molested.
144
Just stay away from the child molester house.
145
I know, because he did something to me when I was your age.
146
So just stay away from the child molester house.
147
We really did.
148
We had a town child molester.
149
His name was Jean Baptiste.
150
It's a true story.
151
And he liked teenage boys.
152
That's when you would find out,
153
because I was a teenage boy.
154
He didn't like me.
155
I felt a little bad.
156
Like, no, not you.
157
He wasn't into me.
158
But he would drive up next to teenage boys,
159
and he'd say, uh, hello,
160
would you like to go to McDonald's?
161
And you're like, no. And he's like,
162
why you don't like McDonald's?
163
And then you're trapped, because,
164
of course, everybody liked McDonald's.
165
It was the 70s.
166
And then I had one friend who used to get in the car.
167
He'd be like, sure, I'll go.
168
And he'd get in the car.
169
He'd go to McDonald's and eat a burger,
170
and then he'd say, see ya,
171
and he'd just take off.
172
And Jean-Baptiste was like, He was like,
173
I cannot get the exact same child.
174
And he foiled again.
175
But he'd always try, maybe this time...
176
because child molesters are very tenacious people.
177
They love molesting childs.
178
It's crazy.
179
It's like their favorite thing.
180
I mean, when you...
181
It's so crazy, because when you consider the risk in being a child molester,
182
speaking not of even the damage you're doing,
183
But the risk, there is no worse life available to a human than being a caught child molester.
184
And yet they still do it!
185
Which from, you can only really surmise that it must be really good.
186
I mean, from their point of view,
187
from their, not ours, but from their point of view,
188
it must be amazing for them to risk so much.
189
Be- How do you think I feel?
190
This is my last show, probably.
191
Because...
192
Look, I can't key into it,
193
because I love mountains bars.
194
I love mountains bars.
195
It's my favorite thing, right?
196
But there's a limit.
197
I mean, I-I can't even eat a mountains bar and do something else at the same time.
198
That's how much I love them.
199
Like, if I'm eating a mountains bar,
200
I can't read the paper like, Mmm.
201
Mmm.
202
I have to just sit there with it in my mouth and go,
203
Why is this so good?
204
I love this so much.
205
And because they are delicious.
206
And yet, if somebody said to me,
207
if you eat another Moundsboro,
208
you'll go to jail and everybody will hate you,
209
I would stop eating them.
210
Because they do taste delicious,
211
but they don't taste as good as a young boy does and shouldn't.
212
To a child molester, not to me.
213
Not to us, because we're all awesome.
214
All right, we did it.
215
We got through it.
216
We got a great show tonight!
217
Brianna is here!
218
So stick around and we'll be right back!
219
We are two wild and crazy guys!
220
And you're hot!
221
Swing!
222
I can see Russia from my house!
223
New York's hottest club is...
224
40 seasons, one app.
225
Bye.
Download App
AI scoring for every sentence you speak
TRENDING
Popular
About This Lesson
In this lesson, you will have the opportunity to enhance your English speaking skills by analyzing and practicing alongside a monologue by comedian Louis C.K. The transcript showcases a blend of humor, anecdotes, and cultural commentary, providing a rich context for learning. By listening and repeating phrases, you will engage in the shadowing technique, which is effective for improving pronunciation, intonation, and fluency. You'll also pick up on colloquial expressions and the nuances of spoken English, making it an excellent choice for IELTS speaking practice.
Key Vocabulary & Phrases
- mild racism - A term used to describe subtle, non-aggressive discriminatory attitudes.
- honored - Feeling respect and admiration for an opportunity or a role.
- decade - A period of ten years, often referred to in discussions about cultural changes.
- pizza place - A casual term for a restaurant or shop that specializes in selling pizza.
- interrupted - To stop someone from speaking by starting to speak yourself.
- extremely mild - A phrase indicating that something is very minor or slight.
- example - A representative case or scenario used to illustrate a point.
- offended - Feeling upset or insulted by something said or done.
Practice Tips
To make the most of this lesson, try the following techniques:
- Listen Actively: First, watch the video without attempting to speak. Focus on Louis C.K.'s intonation, rhythm, and how he uses pauses.
- Shadowing Technique: Play the video again and start mimicking his speech immediately after he speaks. This shadow speech exercise will help you acquire his pace and tone.
- Break It Down: If the monologue feels too fast, pause after each sentence to repeat it. This will improve your confidence and clarity.
- Focus on Vocabulary: Pay attention to the key vocabulary provided. Try incorporating these phrases into your own conversations to enhance your fluency.
- Regular Practice: Make this a weekly practice. Repeating exercises with different videos can be effective for consistent improvement in your ability to learn English with YouTube.
By utilizing these strategies, you will not only refine your speaking skills but also gain a deeper understanding of cultural references and humor in the English language, which is essential for effective communication.
What is the Shadowing Technique?
Shadowing is a science-backed language learning technique originally developed for professional interpreter training and popularized by polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. The method is simple but powerful: you listen to native English audio and immediately repeat it out loud — like a shadow following the speaker with just a 1–2 second delay. Unlike passive listening or grammar drills, shadowing forces your brain and mouth muscles to simultaneously process and reproduce real speech patterns. Research shows it significantly improves pronunciation accuracy, intonation, rhythm, connected speech, listening comprehension, and speaking fluency — making it one of the most effective methods for IELTS Speaking preparation and real-world English communication.
☕ Buy us a coffee
ShadowingEnglish remains 100% free thanks to your support. Server and AI costs are high — your coffee keeps us going! 🙏