ฝึกพูดภาษาอังกฤษด้วยเทคนิค Shadowing จากวิดีโอ: This Is What Happens When You Reply to Spam Email | James Veitch | TED

Reviewer.pxs.

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Reviewer.pxs.

A few years ago, I got one of those spam emails.

And it managed to get through my spam filter,

I'm not quite sure how,

but it's turned up in my inbox,

and it was from a guy called Solomon Odonka.

I know.

It went like this.

It said, Hello, James Veitch.

I have an interesting business proposal I want to share with you, Solomon.

Now, my hand was kind of hovering on the delete button.

As you are, I was looking at my phone,

I thought, I could just delete this,

or I could do what I think we've all always wanted to do.

And I said, Solomon, your email intrigues me.

And the game was afoot.

He said, dear James Veach,

we shall be shipping gold to you.

You will earn 10% of any gold you distribute.

So I knew I was dealing with a professional.

I said, how much is it worth?

He said, we will start with a smaller quantity.

I was like, aww.

And then he said, of 25 kilograms,

the worst should be about 2.5 million.

I said, Solomon, if we're going to do it, let's go big.

I can handle it.

How much gold do you have?

He said, it's not a matter of how much gold I have,

but this is your capable of handling.

What, we could start with 50 kilograms as a trial shipment.

I said, 50 kilograms?

There's no point doing this at all,

no such as shipping at least a metric ton.

So what do you do for a living?

I said, I'm a hedge fund executive bank manager.

This isn't the first time I've shipped bullion, my friend.

No, no, no. Then I started to panic.

I was like, look, where are you based?

I don't know about you,

but I think we're going via the postal service.

It ought to be signed for.

That's a lot of gold.

He said, it will not be easy to convince my company to do a larger quantity shipment.

I said, Solomon, I'm completely with you on this one.

I'm putting together a visual for you to take him to the board meeting, hold tight.

This is what I sent Solomon.

I don't know if we have any statisticians in the house,

but there's definitely something going on.

I said, Solomon, attach this email,

you'll find a helpful chart.

I've had one of my assistants run the numbers.

We need to be shipping as much gold as possible.

There's always a moment where they try to tug your heartstrings,

and this was it for Solomon.

He said, I will be so much happier if the deal goes well,

because I'm going to get a very good commission as well.

And I said, that's amazing,

what are you going to spend your cut on?

And he said, on real estate, what about you?

I thought about it for a long time.

And I said one word.

Hummus.

It's going, please.

I was in Sainsbury's the other day,

and there were like 30 different varieties.

Also, you can cut up carrots,

and you can dip them.

Have you ever done that?

Solomon!

He said, I have to go to bed now.

Till tomorrow, have sweet dreams.

I didn't know what to say.

I said, bonsoir, my golden nugget.

Bonsoir.

Guys, you have to understand,

this has been going for like weeks,

albeit hitherto the greatest weeks of my life,

but I had to knock it on the head.

It was getting a bit out of hand.

James, do you want to come out for a drink?

I was like, I can't,

mate, I'm expecting an email about some gold.

So I figured I had to knock it on the head,

I had to take it to a ridiculous conclusion.

So I thought I concocted a plan.

I said, look, Solomon, Solomon, I'm concerned about security.

When we email each other,

we need to use a code. And he agreed.

And I said, Solomon, I spent all night coming up with this code.

We need to use it in all further correspondence.

Lawyer!

Gummy bear.

Bank, cream egg.

Legal, fizzy-Cola bottle, claim peanut lemon ends,

documents, jelly beans, Western Union.

Guys, a giant gummy lizard.

I knew these were all words they used, right?

100

I said, please call me KitKat and all further correspondence.

101

I didn't hear back.

102

I thought, I've gone too far.

103

I've gone too far.

104

So I had to backpedal a I said,

105

look, Solomon, is the deal still on?

106

Kit-Kat.

107

Because you have to be consistent.

108

Then I did get any more back from him.

109

He said, the business is on, I'm trying .. blah, blah, blah.

110

I said, dude, you have to use the code.

111

What follow is the greatest email I've ever received?

112

I'm not joking.

113

This is what turned up in my inbox.

114

This was a good day.

115

The business is on.

116

And I'm trying to raise the balance for the gummy bear.

117

So he can submit all the needed fizzy-cola-bottled jelly beans to the cream egg for the peanut M&M's process to start.

118

Send 1,500 pounds via a giant Scammy lizard.

119

And that was so much fun, right?

120

That it got me thinking,

121

what would happen if I just spent as much time as I could replying to as many scam emails as I could?

122

And that's what I've been doing for three years on your behalf.

123

Yeah.

124

Yeah.

125

Let me tell you, crazy stuff happens when you start replying to scam e-mails.

126

It's really difficult, and I highly recommend we do it.

127

I don't think what I'm doing is mean, right?

128

You know, there are a lot of people out there who do mean things to scammers.

129

I don't think what I'm doing ...

130

All I'm doing is wasting their time.

131

And I think any time they're spending with me is time they're not spending scamming vulnerable adults out of their savings.

132

Right?

133

And if you're going to do this,

134

and I highly recommend you do,

135

get yourself a pseudonymous email address.

136

Don't use your own email address,

137

because that's exactly what I was doing at the start,

138

and it was a nightmare.

139

about penis enlargements, you know.

140

Only one of which was a legitimate ...

141

.. response to a medical question.

142

I'll tell you what, though, guys.

143

I'll tell you what.

144

Any day is a good day.

145

Any day is a good day if you receive an email that begins like this.

146

I am Winnie Mandela, the second wife of Nelson Mandela,

147

the former South African president.

148

I was like, oh, that Winnie Mandela!

149

I know so many.

150

I need to transfer 45 million dollars out of the country because of my husband Nelson's health condition.

151

Let that sink in.

152

She sent me this, which is hysterical. And this.

153

And this looks fairly legitimate,

154

this is a letter of authorization,

155

but to be honest, if there's nothing written on it,

156

it's just a shape.

157

I say, Winnie, I'm really sorry to hear of this,

158

I'm really sorry to hear of this.

159

Given that Nelson died three months ago,

160

I describe his health condition as ...

161

That's the worst health condition you can have, not being alive.

162

She said, Kindly comply with my banker's instructions, one love.

163

I said, of course, a woman with no cry.

164

She said, my banker will need transfer of $3,000.

165

One love.

166

I said, no problemo.

167

I shall share it.

168

Thank you.

169

Thank you.

TRENDING

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