تدريب Shadowing: your parents placed too much pressure on you - تعلم التحدث بالإنجليزية مع YouTube

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My dad is a doctor, my mum doctor, me their firstborn son, YouTuber, and also a doctor.

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My dad is a doctor, my mum doctor, me their firstborn son, YouTuber, and also a doctor.

But getting there wasn't easy.

It was filled with immense sacrifice, countless nights of studying, and the slowly worsening, crushing weight of all the pressure that was mounted on me.

My parents, especially my mum, always pushed academics over anything else.

So if the results were anything less than straight A's, then I could have tried a little harder.

I just had to put in a bit more effort.

I always had the potential to do it.

Because Mars, if it's not you, then who?

Mom.

I'm eight.

I was expected to get straight A's in every single subject.

Except for PE, for which you'd just say, oh, you know, that's just sports.

And back then I was like, yeah, I hate sports.

You're so based, Mom.

You're giving, serving, slaying, six, seven, maxing.

But now, as an adult being told that spores isn't important, I totally disagree.

Like, you definitely need to get some exercise.

I am a doctor after all.

Now, do I also sit at my computer working on YouTube for hours on end, muscles decaying, bones wasting away?

Yes, but hey, do as I say and not as I do, okay?

Please, thank you.

Being the first son of two doctors, there was so much cultural pressure to continue and pursue medicine to carry on the legacy of the family.

And I didn't really have any excuse at this point.

They got me cornered.

This indoctrination, or indoctrination, started super young.

I had to learn four languages by the time I turned four.

You can do the math on that one.

But they also made me learn up to the 20 times tables, memorize 100 notable historic figures and why they were famous, practicing global geography with my brother and failing at it, recite 20 chapters of our holy book, and know cardiac anatomy by age 10.

This is all true.

I now realize I didn't have a normal childhood.

Oh gosh, I need therapy.

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If only you could have defended me about what was to come, because if home lessons weren't enough, my parents also enrolled me into an additional after-school math and reading tutor called Kumon.

Oh, here we go.

I hate Kumon with a passion.

Why was I spending extra time outside of homework to study more?

I was also 10.

Like, bro, all I want to do is play Pokemon.

I'm just I'm about to catch Dialga!

It's okay, Beta.

If anyone can do this, it's you.

This was a very nice sentiment that unfortunately went straight down the toilet because I cheated so hard.

Kumon is all about independent study, growing, not playing Pokemon so much, you know?

But when I found out they gave my parents the answer sheet for proofreading.

Oh boy, time to independently study how to rob my own education.

They didn't realize that the answers were in the folder that Kumon gave us, so it was ridiculously easy for me to slip out and transcribe all the answers, resulting in straight 100% on every single paper I touch.

Young Mii should have studied, because then he would have realized that getting every single answer correct every single time was a surefire way of being called out, because the very next time we went to Kumon, they sat me down and had me do a test in front of them, and I failed every single question.

I'm gonna die.

I'm so sorry.

I'm gonna be a YouTuber.

I need to do this.

I'm gonna be a YouTuber.

It's probably a good thing they caught it early though.

You definitely don't want your doctor developing a cheating habit.

So I'll just make an incision right here.

I can retake this, right?

Hey, chat GPT.

How do I suture a heart?

That trauma, I mean, learning hiccup, helped me realise the importance of actually studying.

Because one day, despite sitting through an extremely difficult math exam, I still got a 99% A plus on it, beating out everybody else in my grade.

And after getting this award, I ran off ecstatic about my results, so giddy, to tell my parents, Mom, I got 99% on this exam.

Are you proud of me?

Where's the 1%?

Wait, what?

Where's the 1%?

I'm sorry, I just, I didn't know.

Because if anybody can do it, it's you.

But thank you, I guess.

As you can imagine, this worsened my already competitive nature because I now had to get 100% or else I was a failure.

During high school, these expectations started to get much more overbearing.

My parents asked me about what I wanted to do for my career, really pushing me to try to be a doctor.

And I just had to stand up and tell them, no, I will never, ever go to medical school, no matter what ha- Ah, shit.

I already talked about why I decided to pursue medicine in another video, but here's some bits that I didn't mention.

Despite attaining the success that my parents mapped out for me, I didn't feel successful at all.

In fact, just a year into medical school, I couldn't help but feel hollow and spiteful that I wasn't able to pursue what I actually wanted to do.

Draw, make videos, tell stories, just, you know, being creative.

And that's what led to this YouTube channel that I started secretly, which didn't last very long.

Bitta, what are you working on?

I am not throwing away my shot, mom!

This started off as a hobby, an escape from the strict expectations that my parents had for me.

Once my channel started to grow, that internal trigger for success kicked in and I had to give 100% to YouTube.

Whilst also giving 100% in medical school and all of my extracurricular things like committees, going on tour, playing on local theatre, I had to give 100% for that too.

And a simple fact that I just had to realise at that time and even now is that I do not have 300% of energy.

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And so it was, and still is, an incredibly tough balance to maintain.

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But then, in the midst of all of this now self-inflicted pressure, I muttered something under my breath that had become ingrained into me.

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If anybody can do it, it's you.

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It was from then on that I started to reflect on how I was raised, how I was carrying these expectations and pressure.

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Because from my parents' perspective, I totally get it.

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They have given up every single aspect of their life to be able to go across to a brand new country, purely to chase opportunities for their own family.

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I'm sure they want the utmost best for us, and performing well in academics will be able open up as many doors as possible, hopefully starting a positive cycle that benefits generations going forward, paying tribute to what my extended family did for both my parents.

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So looking back, all of this becomes subconscious and retrospective lessons for me.

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Kumon highlighting the need for independence, instilling the mindset of working first, then playing later, and to be honest when it comes to academics,

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the 99% debacle underpinned that we have to strive for the best that we possibly can, learn from what fell through the cracks and digest it in a way to help us improve for the next time, but also be satisfied with the end result no matter what.

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Lastly, the time in university was important to learn how to handle pressure, how to be resilient and how to work my way through whatever needs to be done.

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I do think there's a balance to be had here when it comes to encouragement, pressure and trauma.

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And sometimes people can do things behaviorally that hurt you for a very long time.

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and puts a lot of responsibility on you to overcome it.

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What may put things into perspective is that parents don't often know what they're doing, especially with their first kid.

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I'm at the age now where my parents had me.

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I am definitely, definitely not perfect.

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So I realise now that it wasn't fair to have expected that from my parents either.

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So I want to say thank you, mum and dad, for pushing me to succeed,

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for supporting me throughout medical school, for giving me the mindset to be able to pursue my creative endeavors, and of course, fully and completely believing in me.

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I never could have become the person I am today without the hard work and sacrifices that you had to make.

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I hope that I've made you proud.

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And for those who are going through their own struggles, it may sound corny, but we as people are so much more capable than we give ourselves credit for.

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I sincerely do hope that you can overcome whatever adversity comes your way.

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And I don't know if this will work for you, but if anybody can do it, it's you.

YouTube

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