Shadowing Practice: What no one tells you about Vipassana retreats - Learn English Speaking with Video

hello world i thought i would do a video explaining my experience on the goenka

vipassana retreats silent retreats because i've sat a few of them now

and i feel like it would be really useful for people

who are thinking about sitting one people who are interested to hear some experiences

because i feel like it's very helpful to have that kind of stuff when you're going into something that's so unknown.

I mean, what else in society do we have that's like a silent meditation retreat?

It's so weird.

And they are very intense.

You're waking up at 4am, you're meditating pretty much all of the day.

I don't know if there's any research on this, but it's a very common anecdote that when you're concentrated in meditation, you don't need much sleep.

So I was sleeping like three to four hours a night on this previous, this retreat I just got out of

and I mean that's unheard of for me I usually sleep eight to nine hours

and I was kind of shocked I didn't know about

that part of meditation um going into it honestly

and it was only when I got out

and I told the other meditators who were just way more advanced than me

and they were like oh yeah that's that's normal don't worry

about it I will post the course schedule somewhere in this video I'll just post it as an image

because you should see you see the schedule before you go into it obviously

but you can find it all on the dharma uh websites

of the goenka retreats um the whole retreat thing there are culty bits to it you should know

that too before you go in it's it's supposed to be non-sectarian

but there is a lot of order that's imposed

when you go in uh on my first retreat they may have abolished this rule now

because i didn't get told off for it

recently but on my very first retreat they were very fixated on getting me to

wear long pants in the hall they didn't like the fact

that I was wearing shorts in the hall

and my knees were showing that's not allowed I got told off for walking on this most recent retreat

and you need to be completely dead silent all the time

which I understand you need this order to make the retreats run well.

But you should just be aware that it does kind of feel like a cult.

Also, there are some strict rules that you have to adhere to, like not leaving.

They don't want you to leave on these retreats.

So they'll try to counsel you away from it.

Obviously, if they can see you're mentally breaking, they'll let you leave.

And on my first retreat, I was sitting at the back of the hall because I requested a chair.

and you look at the men over the front of the

hall on the left side there are women on the right side

and over the 10 days 80 of the men just trickled off

because it is really difficult and you get into these negative thought spirals

that you can't escape because there's no distraction like there is in the external world and you start realizing,

oh my God, I've been using distraction to escape negative thought spirals and negative emotional states for my whole life.

And I don't have that luxury now.

You should be aware of how hard it is.

I mean, I've cried on, yeah, I was crying on this recent retreat in the hall and like sobbing like a baby.

It's really, really rough.

And it's very, very hard on yourself psychologically it's also hard physically sitting for you know many hours a day it's very difficult

and you do strong determination sets where you're just sitting for an hour

and you're not allowed to move those are very painful i

mean you'd be surprised at how painful it is just to sit

it doesn't sound hard

but it's like an athletic event go into it with a mindset that's anti-fragile that you can always improve, that you can always overcome,

and that whatever happens, you're going to be okay.

Like a, you know, like a psychedelic trip, you want that kind of mindset.

You don't want to be thinking of experiences that you have as bad or toxic, you know, like triggering and things like that.

Think of them as difficult.

Think of everything as an obstacle to overcome on this path.

I think that will help a lot.

You know, you get these stats, like a certain number of these people who do meditation retreats

have you know severe mental health problems um initiated from the retreat not permanent obviously uh

but at least for a few weeks or a few months afterwards

you know it's kind of like a psychotic break

that you'd have after a psychedelic trip there are all All these sayings in the Buddhist communities like,

no mud, no lotus, if a tree aspires to heaven its roots must reach down to hell.

All these sayings get at this idea

that you have to go through a lot of suffering

and pain and processing of difficult emotions to get the benefits of meditation in the first place.

And yeah, there will be casualties, I suppose, of

that, just like there is for the benefits of exercise you to train in the gym you lift weights

or you try to become a faster sprinter you try to

get your vertical jump higher there are a certain number of people who get injured from

that process even though it's beneficial in aggregate it's kind of dangerous

if you look at the outliers i don't think you should let

that deter you from exercise and i don't think you should let

that deter you from meditation it's just part of the process

it's like anything in life that's valuable you have to go

through pain you know the gym bros they say no pain

no gain that's true no pain no gain uh it sounds cliche

but that's because it's just it's found found in so many areas of life including meditation.

Now, the actual technique is magical.

I mean, it is extremely powerful.

And I know I sound like I'm proselytizing here,

but I think that so many Westerners just have this idea

that the only path to the good life is to earn

more money to get a job that's prestigious work your way up the hierarchy become popular get a big house

and just have a lot of material success and the technique kind of shows you that

you don't have to have a life that's entirely contingent, entirely depends upon the story in your head that you're telling yourself.

The reason those material things feel so valuable to us is because they improve the story in your head.

Life is much more bearable when you can say, you know, I'm richer than my neighbor and I've done so well,

I'm so proud of myself and I'm killing it in life.

You know, I have all the success that I want.

When you're running a positive story in your head, life is good.

But the flip side of that is that if you're relying on the story, when you have a shit story in your head, you're going to have a shit life.

So if you're thinking, you know, oh, why'd that person talk to me in that way?

Were they insulting me

or you're thinking oh you know i just got laid off

at work i'm not gonna be able to pay my bills

or or i've got this roof leak

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and i'm stressed about it i need to fix it immediately you know

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if you're thinking these negative thoughts about life

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or stressful thoughts your life will be bad you you will experience extreme negative emotion and uh live a shitty life

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meditation simply allows you another path to leave

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that story to just witness it see it for what it is arising as just another object of consciousness

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and find peace despite the story you're running and I know

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that sounds like some hippie abstract find peace despite the story you're running like

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that doesn't really make sense once you just witness

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that story for what it truly is

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and you see it for a story it's kind of like

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you've been engrossed in this scary um play like a shakespearean play

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that you're in the audience of

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and you were just engrossed in the play you are feeling all the negative emotion seeing the characters die

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and then all of a sudden you see you're sitting outside the play

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and it's just this beautiful show out in front of you

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and that's what it's like um progressing i guess on the on the path that you're given in these retreats

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you see it for what it is and that's what vipassana means it means uh clear seeing

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so it doesn't matter if you're thinking the goal of meditation is not to get rid of thoughts

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and that's beautiful because you can meditate permanently.

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You can just be meditating continually and I guess that's the goal is to meditate in the shower when you're eating, when you're sitting down and like filming this video.

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If I pay attention, i can actively meditate and

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and see the train of thoughts

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and witness it as it's kind of flopping out my mouth um yeah

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so so i do find value in the technique but there are casualties that would sum up my thoughts on meditation

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extreme value but

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that doesn't come without risk now should you do a retreat i would just do it

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if you're interested in the nature of mind

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if you want to find out about this life that's why i decided to do it ultimately like i'm i'm

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so interested in this world around me and an experience as it is

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and there are a lot of delusionary delusional sorry delusional ways of

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perceiving the world that you cut through with meditation

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and that's what ultimately drove me to it it was like

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the pursuit of the truth rather than pursuit of well-being per

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se i'll just say this one thing the last day you do a different technique called loving kindness meditation or Metta meditation.

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And that is easily one of the most valuable things about the retreat.

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It is such a beautiful day.

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You sit there and you focus on the whole day.

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You focus on all the beings in the world and you just wish them well.

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You cultivate feelings of goodwill and well-wishing towards them.

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You wish them happiness and peace.

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And you wish that they're free from suffering

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and you feel this deep in the core of your being

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and you cultivate this feeling not just for the people you like

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but for the people you don't like for the people who

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have wronged you people who have done harm to you

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and on that day you could just hear sobs

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and tears just radiating through the hall from you know not just the female side um the male side too

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and and these are not just Just narrow-shouldered granola boys who are crying, which you might expect on a meditation retreat.

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These are strong men who are crying and strong women who are crying and pushing past so much resentment,

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animosity that they felt for other people and just dropping that.

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And that's just so freeing when you are able to do that.

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It's such a beautiful thing.

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And I think if you're going to go, that's worth it.

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That one day is worth it just on its own.

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What a person sees in somebody else is what's really latent with them.

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So every person is a mirror.

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So, yeah, would recommend.

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If you go, I wish you all the best.

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And let me know how your retreat goes if you end up doing one.

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How old are you?

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I'm 83.

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83? yeah oh wow how does it feel how does it feel you've mastered um feels terrible yeah

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but you've mastered being human you're at the peak of wisdom anything as i said i don't know anything

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Shadowing Practice: What no one tells you about Vipassana retreats - Learn English Speaking with Video

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