Pratique du Shadowing: The Charms of Unavailable People - Apprendre l'anglais à l'oral avec YouTube

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It's an odd feature of love that some of our most romantic moments can include the following scenarios.
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It's an odd feature of love that some of our most romantic moments can include the following scenarios.
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Being with a lover who lives a whole continent away from us and can never move to be closer.
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An infatuation with a lover who is married to somebody else and has no will ever to leave them.
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A romance with someone dying of a disease that will kill them within a matter of months.
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A crush on someone at the library,
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who we never talk to yet think of obsessively,
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even when it turns out they have a partner.
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Or the last days of a holiday romance before we have to take a gruelling 12-hour flight back home.
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What unites all these situations is an external obstacle to love,
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which, paradoxically, serves to make our desire more intense.
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We might suppose that our love would be strong in spite of the challenges.
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But the situation is weirder than this.
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Our love is strong precisely because a proper relationship is not possible in the real world,
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because love is fated to be in some way unrequited or incomplete.
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People stuck in these unrequited situations can garner a lot of sympathy and seem like the natural friends of true love.
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But they tend to be no such things.
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They are timid visitors to the land of love,
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who have carefully chosen situations which will prevent them from ever taking up more permanent residence.
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They are self-saboteurs who would rather be in control of a sad situation than half out of control of a happy one.
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They have carefully made sure that there is no chance either to disappoint or to be disappointed.
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It is the external obstacle that gives them the security to surrender themselves totally
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to feelings that they would keep well at bay if,
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miraculously, the obstacle were to be removed.
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To feel a lot for someone who is available is an emotionally highly flammable requirement.
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The possibilities for getting hurt are enormous.
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We might learn to trust a lover over many years
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and then promptly find that they decided to leave us or died in the night.
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We couldn't survive.
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Our defences mask too gelatinous and insecure in an interior.
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We would have given them the keys to our self-confidence
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and direction and would struggle after so long to know how to carry on.
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Not all of us have the psychological histories
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that make us robust enough to dare to enter situations where mutual trust is a risk
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that we can dare to endure day to day.
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We may have been let down too badly as children,
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perhaps a parent left or humiliated us,
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and we are at some level therefore profoundly determined never again to surrender in the true sense to another person.
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We don't put it that way to ourselves, of course.
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We're most likely not even aware of the pattern we're involved in.
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We just feel very in love whenever someone happens to reside very far away,
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while we report that a person who has an apartment round the corner is truly very boring and not that sexy.
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It sounds for a time before you can start to see the pattern rather plausible.
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The true challenge of relationships is not to fall in love with someone who may never want to see us again.
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It is to accept the far more interesting and truly heroic challenge of falling in love with someone who isn't dying,
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isn't stationed in the Arctic or married to somebody else,
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someone who would have no objection to seeing us pretty much all the time.
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Impossible situations feel so romantic not because we have found a soulmate,
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but because the absence of risk has loosened our hearts.
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But we should, with time,
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more fairly, learn to dare to turn our amorous attentions to that deeply dangerous,
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threatening, but ultimately rewarding character.
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The person we know, the person who likes us a lot,
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lot and the person who's available all the time.
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Now that would be truly romantic.
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To learn more about love,
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try our book on How to Find Love,
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which explains why we have the types we do,

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Why practice speaking with this video?

The video "The Charms of Unavailable People" presents a unique opportunity for English learners to engage with complex emotional topics and nuanced expressions. By practicing speaking along with this video, you not only improve your English pronunciation but also enhance your ability to discuss intricate themes related to love and relationships. These discussions are particularly relevant for IELTS speaking practice, where demonstrating a range of vocabulary and the ability to articulate thoughts clearly can significantly boost your score.

Engaging with the content through shadow speech can enable learners to internalize natural speech patterns while developing a deeper understanding of the language's emotional depth. As you repeat the phrases, you'll foster confidence in your speaking abilities, ultimately leading to a more authentic and expressive communication style.

Grammar & Expressions in Context

This video features several key grammatical structures and expressions that are essential for advanced English learners:

  • Conditional Structures: Phrases such as "If we had the chance..." illustrate the use of hypotheticals, providing context for discussing unreal situations.
  • Present Perfect Tense: The speaker mentions emotional past experiences, such as "have never moved closer," which helps articulate feelings linked to past actions.
  • Comparative Forms: Expressions like "rather be in control of a sad situation" rely on comparative structures which are vital for discussing preferences.
  • Complex Sentences: The video contains sentences that combine multiple ideas, e.g., “Those who love someone unavailable tend to avoid...” This showcases the use of subordinating clauses, essential for advanced writing and speaking.

By practicing these structures through a shadowing app, learners can refine their grammar and enhance their fluency.

Common Pronunciation Traps

As you engage with the video, pay attention to the following pronunciation challenges:

  • "Romance": This word can be tricky; the emphasis should be on the second syllable (ro-MANCE).
  • "Infatuation": Often mispronounced, ensure to articulate all four syllables: in-fac-tu-a-tion.
  • "Obstacles": Many learners struggle with this word’s stresses. Break it down as ob-sta-cles to improve clarity.

By practicing these pronunciation elements regularly, you can dramatically improve your English pronunciation. Using shadowing techniques, where you imitate the pronunciations and intonations of the speaker, will further enhance your skills. This method not only helps with fluency but also boosts confidence in speaking, making it an invaluable practice tool for English learners.

Qu'est-ce que la technique du Shadowing ?

Le Shadowing est une technique d'apprentissage des langues fondée sur la science, développée à l'origine pour la formation des interprètes professionnels. Le principe est simple mais puissant : vous écoutez de l'anglais natif et le répétez immédiatement à voix haute — comme une ombre suivant le locuteur avec un décalage de 1 à 2 secondes. Les recherches montrent une amélioration significative de la précision de la prononciation, de l'intonation, du rythme, des liaisons, de la compréhension orale et de la fluidité.

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