Shadowing Practice: Every Negotiation Tactic & How To Use Them Yourself, Explained - Learn English Speaking with Video
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Anchoring.
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Anchoring is the first number that gets thrown into a negotiation.
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It could be a salary offer, a house price, or how much you're willing to pay for a used car.
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Whatever that first number is, it doesn't just start the conversation.
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It shapes everything that follows.
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Your brain latches onto it, even when you know you shouldn't.
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That initial figure becomes the reference point, and every other number gets measured against it.
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If someone offers you $60 ,000 for a job, suddenly $55 ,000 feels low and $65 ,000 feels high,
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even if the role is actually worth $80 ,000.
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The anchor pulled your expectations toward it.
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Here's how it works.
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When you hear a number first, your brain uses it as a mental starting line.
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Even if you try to ignore it, even if you think it's unfair, that number has already set the frame.
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Psychologists have tested this over and over.
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Show people a random number before asking them to guess something completely unrelated, and their guesses will drift toward that number.
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The effect is invisible, but powerful.
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So, if you want to use anchoring yourself, go first.
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Throw out a number that's bold, but not absurd.
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If you're selling something, start higher than you expect to get.
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If you're buying, start lower.
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The key is believability.
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Go too extreme, and you lose credibility.
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But go first with confidence, and you've just set the boundary for everything that comes next.
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Even when the other side counters, they're countering within the world your anchor created.
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And here's the hardest truth about anchoring.
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Even when both people know the trick, it still works.
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Awareness doesn't make you immune.
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The first number still plants itself in your mind, still tugs at your sense of what's reasonable.
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That's why anchoring isn't just a tactic.
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It's the opening move that decides the shape of the entire game.
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Mirroring.
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Mirroring is repeating the last few words someone just said back to them, but as a question.
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That's it.
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You take their exact words, give them an upward inflection, and wait.
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It sounds too simple to matter, but it triggers something automatic in the human brain.
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When you hear your own words reflected back, you instinctively want to explain more, to clarify, to fill in what you think the other person didn't understand.
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So you keep talking.
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And the more you talk, the more you reveal.
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Here's what happens in real time.
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Someone says, I can't go lower than $500.
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You respond, lower than $500?
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With a slight questioning tone.
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They hear that and their brain interprets it as confusion or doubt, so they elaborate.
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Well, I mean, I have costs to cover, and the market rate is usually around that range, but I guess if you're paying cash, I could maybe do $4 .75.
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You didn't argue.
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You didn't counter.
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You just repeated three words, and they gave you new information and a better price.
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Mirroring works because it feels like active listening.
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The other person thinks you're engaged, trying to understand them.
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And you are, but strategically.
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You're extracting details they didn't plan to share.
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The beauty of mirroring is that it requires almost no effort and carries zero risk.
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You're not making claims, not showing your hand.
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You're just echoing, and they're doing all the work.
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People want to be understood.
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They'll keep talking until they feel like you get it.
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And while they're talking, you're learning exactly where the edges of their position really are.
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Tactical silence.
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Tactical silence is saying absolutely nothing after the other person finishes talking.
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No response, no counter, no acknowledgement.
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Just silence.
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And that silence becomes unbearable.
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Human beings are wired to avoid awkward pauses in conversation.
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Dead air feels wrong, uncomfortable, like something needs to be fixed immediately.
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So when you stay quiet, the other person's brain starts working overtime to fill that gap.
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And when they do, they usually give you something valuable.
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Maybe they lower their price without you asking.
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Maybe they reveal a concern they were hiding.
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Maybe they just keep talking and accidentally expose the limits of their position.
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The discomfort of silence creates pressure, and pressure makes people move.
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Here's how it works in practice.
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Someone makes you an offer.
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Instead of responding right away, you just pause.
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Five seconds.
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Ten seconds.
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You stay calm, you hold eye contact if you're in person, and you let the quiet sit there.
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That pause sends a message without words.
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It signals doubt, hesitation, dissatisfaction.
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And the person across from you will interpret that silence as rejection, even though you haven't said a thing.
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So they start backpedaling, sweetening the deal, offering explanations.
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Silence forces them to negotiate against themselves.
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The power of tactical silence lies in restraint.
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You're not being rude or difficult.
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You're simply refusing to rush.
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And in that refusal, you create space for them to second guess, reconsider, and concede.
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Most negotiations are lost by the person who speaks first after an offer lands.
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Silence hands you control without you having to say a single word.
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The flinch.
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The flinch is a visible reaction of surprise or disappointment when you hear their number.
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You don't argue yet.
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You don't counter.
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You just react.
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Your eyebrows go up.
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You lean back slightly.
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Maybe you let out a small breath or shake your head.
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The reaction itself becomes the message, and that message plants immediate doubt in the other person's mind.
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They start wondering if they aimed too high, if they misread the situation, if maybe they should adjust before you even say anything.
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The flinch makes them question their own position without you having to challenge it directly.
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Here's why this works.
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When someone states a price or makes a demand, they're often unsure if they got it right.
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They're testing the waters, gauging your reaction.
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If you stay neutral or accept too quickly, they assume they left money on the table.
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But if you flinch, if your face shows genuine shock, they interpret that as proof they overshot.
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And people hate overreaching.
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They want to seem reasonable, fair, competent.
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So when they see your reaction, they often walk themselves back before you've said a word.
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The key to the flinch is authenticity.
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If it looks fake or overdone, you lose credibility.
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But a natural, honest reaction to a number that genuinely surprises you carries real weight.
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You can flinch physically with body language, or verbally with a phrase like, Wow, okay, or, That's higher than I expected.
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Either way, you're buying time and creating doubt.
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The other person now has to justify their number, defend it, or soften it.
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And all you did was show them your face.
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Good Cop, Bad Cop Good Cop, Bad Cop is two people playing opposite roles in the same negotiation.
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One person is harsh, unreasonable, and inflexible.
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The other is friendly, understanding, and wants to help you find a solution.
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You've seen this in every police interrogation scene on television.
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One detective slams the table and threatens consequences.
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The other leans in, offers water, and says they can make this easier if you just cooperate.
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The psychology is simple but devastatingly effective.
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After dealing with the bad cop, the good cop feels like relief.
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You start to trust them, align with them, even feel grateful toward them.
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So when they ask for concessions, you give them willingly because they feel like they're on your side.
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But they're not.
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They're working together toward the exact same goal.
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Here's how it plays out in real negotiations.
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Maybe you're buying a car.
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The salesperson says they'd love to give you that price, but their manager would never approve it.
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The manager is the bad cop you never see.
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Then the salesperson goes to fight for you and comes back with a slightly better offer, acting like they barely convinced their boss.
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You feel like they went to bat for you, so you meet them halfway.
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You just made a concession to someone who was never your ally.
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The door in the face.
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The door in the face is asking for something huge and unreasonable first, getting rejected, then following up with what you actually want.
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The second request seems modest by comparison, and people feel almost obligated to say yes because they already turned you down once.
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The technique gets its name from the image of someone slamming a door in your face after your first ask, but then cracking it open for the second.
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Here's how the psychology works.
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When someone refuses your initial request, they feel a small pang of guilt or social discomfort.
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Saying no feels negative, even when the ask was absurd.
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So when you come back with something smaller and more reasonable, their brain sees it as a compromise.
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They think you've already conceded by lowering your demand.
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So now it's their turn to meet you halfway.
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Reciprocity kicks in.
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You moved, so they feel like they should move too.
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Say you want to borrow someone's car for the weekend.
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Instead of asking directly, you first ask if you can borrow it for the entire month.
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They say no, obviously.
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Then you say, okay, what about just this weekend?
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Suddenly the weekend feels small, manageable, reasonable.
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They're more likely to agree because the contrast makes your real request look minor.
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The key is making sure your first ask is big enough to get rejected, but not so outrageous that you lose credibility.
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If it sounds like a joke, the tactic falls apart.
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But if it seems like a genuine stretch, the follow -up lands perfectly.
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The rejection isn't failure.
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The rejection is the setup that makes your actual goal feel like the fair middle ground.
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BATNA.
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BATNA stands for Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement.
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In simpler terms, it's your backup plan.
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What will you do if this negotiation completely falls apart?
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If you're negotiating a job offer and it doesn't work out, do you have another offer waiting?
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If you're selling your car and the buyer walks away, do you have other interested people lined up?
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Your BATNA is your safety net, and knowing what it is changes everything about how you negotiate.
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When you have a strong alternative, you negotiate from a position of power.
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You can walk away without fear because you're not desperate.
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You don't need this deal, you just want it on the right terms.
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That confidence shows.
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You make bolder moves, you hold your ground, you don't cave under pressure.
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But when your BATNA is weak or non -existent, you negotiate from desperation.
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And desperation is visible.
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The other side can sense it in your tone, your concessions, your willingness to accept terms you shouldn't.
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Here's the reality.
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You cannot bluff a strong If you don't actually have alternatives, pretending you do will eventually collapse.
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The other person will test you, call your bluff, and when you don't walk, they'll know.
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So the goal isn't to fake a good BATNA.
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The goal is to build one before you ever sit down to negotiate.
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Apply for multiple jobs, not just one.
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Get multiple quotes before selling.
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Line up options so that no single deal holds all your leverage.
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Your BATNA determines whether you're negotiating or begging.
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The stronger it is, the less you need any particular outcome.
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And when you don't need something, you're suddenly in the best position to get it.
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The nibble.
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The nibble is asking for one more small thing after the deal is essentially done.
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The price has been agreed on, the terms are set, everyone is mentally ready to close.
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Then, right at the end, you casually mention one last request.
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Could you throw in free delivery?
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How about an extended warranty?
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Would you cover the installation fee?
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The other side has already invested hours, maybe days, into this negotiation.
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They're tired, they want it finished, and your request is small enough that saying no feels petty like torpedoing the entire deal over something minor.
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So they say yes, just to get it over with.
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That's the nibble.
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It works because of timing and psychology.
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By the time you ask, the other person has already made their mental commitment.
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They've agreed to the big number.
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They've told their boss or their spouse.
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They've started imagining the outcome.
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Walking away now over a $50 add -on feels absurd.
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The sunk cost of all that effort makes the small concession feel cheaper than restarting from scratch.
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Here's how to use it.
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Wait until the main terms are locked in.
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Let the other person feel like they've won, like the hard part is behind them.
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Then introduce your nibble as an afterthought, almost apologetically.
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Oh, one last thing.
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Would it be possible to include shipping?
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Keep it genuinely small.
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If you ask for something huge at the finish line, you'll blow up the deal.
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But if you nibble correctly, you get an extra win without renegotiating anything major.
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The other side will give it to you just across the finish line and move on.
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The nibble doesn't reopen the conversation.
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It ends it, but on slightly better terms than before.
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The ultimatum.
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The ultimatum is drawing a hard line.
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Take it or leave it.
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Final offer.
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This is non -negotiable.
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You're eliminating all the back and forth and forcing the other person to make a decision right now.
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Either they accept your terms or the deal ends.
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There's no middle ground, no room for compromise, no next round of discussion.
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Ultimatums create urgency and finality.
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They cut through endless negotiation and demand a choice.
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When used correctly, they can close deals that would otherwise drag on forever or collapse entirely.
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But when used wrong, they blow everything up.
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Here's when an ultimatum works.
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You need leverage first.
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If the other side needs you more than you need them, an ultimatum can push them to commit.
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If you have a strong BATNA and you're genuinely willing to walk away, then drawing a line shows confidence and clarity.
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It signals that you've reached your limit and further discussion won't change anything.
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The other person respects that boundary because they believe you'll enforce it.
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But here's when it backfires.
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If you use an ultimatum too early, before trust is built or terms are explored, you come across as aggressive and unreasonable.
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If you're bluffing and the other side calls you on it, you either have to back down and lose all credibility or walk away from a deal you actually wanted.
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An ultimatum also generates resentment.
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Even if they accept, they'll remember being forced into a corner, and that damages long -term relationships.
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So the rule is simple.
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Only deliver an ultimatum when you're truly prepared to walk away and live with the consequences.
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If you're not ready to lose the deal, don't threaten to end it.
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Because once you say the words, you've locked yourself in.
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And if they call your bluff, you're done.
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Trading not giving.
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Trading not giving means never handing over a concession for free.
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If they ask for something, you ask for something in return.
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Every move you make toward their position should cost them a move toward yours.
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Otherwise, you're just losing ground while they rack up wins without giving anything back.
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Negotiation is exchange, not charity.
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When someone requests a discount, faster delivery, better terms, or any kind of accommodation, your instinct might be to just say yes to keep things moving or seem agreeable.
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But that's a mistake.
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Free concessions signal weakness.
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They tell the other side that asking gets results, so they'll keep asking.
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And worse, they'll assume there's more you're hiding if you gave that up so easily.
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Here's how to trade instead.
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When they ask for something, respond with a conditional phrase.
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If I can do that, would you be willing to commit today?
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Or, I could lower the price to that number if you increase the order size.
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You're not refusing their request.
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You're making it conditional on them giving you something valuable in return.
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This establishes reciprocity as the rule of the conversation.
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Every exchange becomes mutual.
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They learn quickly that nothing comes without a trade.
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The psychology behind this is simple.
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People value what they work for more than what's handed to them.
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If you give a concession freely, they'll see it as expected or even owed.
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But if they have to trade for it, they'll feel like they earned it through negotiation.
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That satisfaction makes them more likely to accept the overall deal.
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Trading also keeps the negotiation balanced.
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You're not the only one making sacrifices.
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You're both moving, both compromising, both invested in reaching an agreement.
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And when both sides feel like they've given and gained, the deal holds stronger and lasts longer.
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Woordenschat en spreektips bij deze les
Deze video bevat 268 zinnen en 2791 woorden om na te spreken. Het gesproken deel duurt 14:56. De spreker praat snel, ongeveer 187 woorden per minuut, dus reken op verbonden en ingeslikte klanken. 84% van de woorden hoort bij de 3.000 meest gebruikte Engelse woorden; de rest kun je beter vooraf bekijken.
Belangrijke woorden in deze video
15 woorden uit de video die het leren waard zijn, met uitspraak en betekenis:
| Woord | Uitspraak | Betekenis |
|---|---|---|
| negotiation zelfstandig naamwoord | /nɪˌɡəʊ.ʃiˈeɪ.ʃən/ | onderhandeling |
| silence zelfstandig naamwoord | /ˈsaɪ̯ləns/ | stilte |
| negotiate werkwoord | /nəˈɡəʊ.ʃi.eɪt/ | onderhandelen |
| psychology zelfstandig naamwoord | /saɪˈkɑ.lə.d͡ʒi/ | psychologie, zielkunde |
| credibility zelfstandig naamwoord | /kɹɛd.əˈbɪ.ɫɪ.ti/ | geloofwaardigheid |
| refuse werkwoord | /ɹɪˈfjuːz/ | weigeren, afslaan |
| tactical bijvoeglijk naamwoord | /ˈtæktɪk(ə)l/ | tactisch |
| absurd bijvoeglijk naamwoord | /əbˈsɜːd/ | absurd |
| rejection zelfstandig naamwoord | /ɹɪˈd͡ʒɛkʃən/ | afwijzing |
| bluff zelfstandig naamwoord | /blʌf/ | bluffen |
| tone zelfstandig naamwoord | /ˈtəʊn/ | toon, noot |
| argue werkwoord | /ˈɑɹ.ɡju/ | redetwisten |
| reveal werkwoord | /ɹɪˈviːl/ | onthullen, zich ontpoppen |
| visible bijvoeglijk naamwoord | /ˈvɪzɪb(ə)l/ | zichtbaar, zichtbare |
| genuine bijvoeglijk naamwoord | /ˈd͡ʒɛn.juˌɪn/ | echt, authentiek |
Phrasal verbs die je zult horen
| Woord | Uitspraak | Betekenis |
|---|---|---|
| fall apart werkwoord | uiteenvallen, uit elkaar vallen | |
| come across werkwoord | overkomen | |
| hand over werkwoord | overhandigen | |
| work out werkwoord | /ˌwɝk ˈaʊt/ | uitrekenen |
Uitspraak om op te letten
De spreker gebruikt 86 samentrekkingen en verkorte vormen, zoals you're, they're, don't. Spreek ze kort uit, zoals je ze hoort.
- De “th”-klanken: threaten /ˈθɹɛt.n̩/, authenticity /ɑθɛnˈtɪsɪti/
- De klanken “sh” en “zh”: negotiation /nɪˌɡəʊ.ʃiˈeɪ.ʃən/, negotiate /nəˈɡəʊ.ʃi.eɪt/, concession /kənˈsɛʃən/, rejection /ɹɪˈd͡ʒɛkʃən/, conditional /kənˈdɪʃ.ə.nəl/
- Lange woorden — let op de klemtoon: negotiation /nɪˌɡəʊ.ʃiˈeɪ.ʃən/, negotiate /nəˈɡəʊ.ʃi.eɪt/, psychology /saɪˈkɑ.lə.d͡ʒi/, credibility /kɹɛd.əˈbɪ.ɫɪ.ti/, genuinely /ˈd͡ʒɛn.ju.ɪn.li/
Zo oefen je met deze video
- Luister de hele video één keer zonder te spreken en noteer de woorden die je niet kent.
- Begin op 0,75× snelheid, spreek zin voor zin na en ga terug naar normale snelheid zodra het makkelijk gaat.
- Neem jezelf op en vergelijk met het origineel; let daarbij op woorden als negotiation, silence, negotiate.
Grammatica in deze video
De structuren die de spreker het meest gebruikt, met de exacte woorden uit de video:
| Structuur | In de video |
|---|---|
| Voorwaardelijke zinnen if + zin, will/would + werkwoord — een voorwaarde en het gevolg | if they accept, they'll remember · If I can do that, would you · If you give a concession freely, they'll see |
| Present perfect have/has + voltooid deelwoord — iets uit het verleden dat nu nog telt | has already set · have tested · you've just set |
| Lijdende vorm be + voltooid deelwoord — het gaat om wat er gebeurt, niet om wie het doet | be understood · are wired · be fixed |
| Betrekkelijke bijzinnen who / which + zin — extra informatie over een persoon of ding | person who speaks · someone who was |
Wat is de Shadowing-techniek?
Shadowing is een wetenschappelijk onderbouwde taalleermethode die oorspronkelijk is ontwikkeld voor professionele tolkentraining en gepopulariseerd door polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. De methode is eenvoudig maar krachtig: je luistert naar native Engelse audio en herhaalt het onmiddellijk hardop — als een schaduw die de spreker volgt met slechts 1–2 seconden vertraging. In tegenstelling tot passief luisteren of grammaticadrills, dwingt shadowing je hersenen en mondspieren om echte spraakpatronen tegelijkertijd te verwerken en te reproduceren. Onderzoek toont aan dat het de uitspraaknauwkeurigheid, intonatie, ritme, verbonden spraak, luisterbegrip en spreekvaardigheid aanzienlijk verbetert — waardoor het een van de meest effectieve methoden is voor IELTS Speaking-voorbereiding en echte Engelse communicatie.