ฝึกพูดภาษาอังกฤษด้วยเทคนิค Shadowing จากวิดีโอ: The Moth GrandSLAM Winner | “I Completely Lost Control of My Classroom”

Sitting at my desk in my fifth grade classroom, I have a boy named Travis next to me.

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Sitting at my desk in my fifth grade classroom, I have a boy named Travis next to me.

He's receiving a private puberty lesson.

He was absent yesterday, so I am currently telling him the nature of female menstruation.

So he's basically having the worst day of his life at this moment.

When I feel a tap on my shoulder, it's a boy named Eric, and he tells me, Mr. Dix, Christian stole my rainbow pencil.

And I'm just like, no. Like, I can't do this anymore.

I don't know if it's because I've been teaching 15 years at that point, or it's May, and I've just had too much of these kids.

I think what it really is, there's too much Christian and Eric energy in my life right now.

These kids that I look at every day, 23 kids, they're supposed to take over the world someday.

They're going to lead the future.

And I look at them and think, we're in a lot of trouble.

Like, I'm losing hope for all that is to come.

And so Eric says, I want my rainbow pencil.

And I say, you know what, Eric, I'm not doing this today.

And he says, but I want my rainbow pencil.

And I say, I quit.

And Aditi, a very bright young lady, says, I don't think you can quit.

You have a contract.

I think you have to stay here until June.

And I'm like, I'm not quitting the profession.

I'm just quitting rainbow pencil nonsense.

I'm not doing it anymore.

I'm not going to be your judge or your jury for any of this anymore.

And Aditi says, who is?

So 15 minutes later, the votes have been tallied, and Maya Flores is going to be the judge, I tell her, in the case of the rainbow pencil.

Now, it's a terrible decision on my part.

Teachers should not create trials in their classroom to deal with behavioral situations.

But I'm one of these guys that once you've said it, you've got to do it or they're going to run right over you.

So it's happening.

Maya says, I don't want to be the judge, and I said, that's exactly why you're going to be the judge the judge

we need more maya flores is in our life we need

people who don't want power to be in power you're the one

so so i tell maya go get your jury pick anybody you want

but don't take eric's friends or christian's friends christian doesn't actually have any friends he's alienated everyone in the class this year.

They all hate him.

But go find impartial people as best you can.

Christian says, I need a lawyer.

I'm like, I agree, you need a lawyer.

Pick whoever you want.

He picks Aditi.

It's his best decision of the entire year.

So Eric says, don't I get a lawyer?

I said, pick anybody you want.

He picks Chaunce Dunbar.

Brilliant choice.

This kid is savvy.

He's good with the words.

Like, I would pick Chaunce Dunbar if I had a choice.

Some kid has taken a ruler and duct taped it to a stapler for a gavel, so when Maya bangs on it, it shoots out staples and bangs at the same time.

So I've got a jury and a judge and defendant and plaintiff and lawyers.

I got six kids that are mad, though, because they don't have a job.

So I make one a court reporter, and I'm going to destroy all her notes when it's done, because there could be no evidence of this atrocity that's about to take place.

I make someone a sketch artist so that they can draw draw.

I tell Travis, you can be the bailiff.

You're just going to stand there and do nothing.

But he's not listening to his fifth grade teacher say the word tampon anymore.

So he's thrilled.

His day has suddenly gotten a hell of a lot better.

And then there's just this Penny girl.

She's so cute, but there's nothing.

I have no job for her.

I'm like, Penny, I don't know what you can do.

And she says, how about I'm the investigator?

I say, great.

This trial is going to take like two minutes.

We're not going to need an investigation, but you're the investigator.

And she's thrilled.

So off we go.

Maya's taking green eggs and ham.

That is the book that they're going to put their hand on and swear to tell the truth.

Maya tells me it's the closest to a Bible in this classroom right now.

And so Eric takes the stand and Chance comes up

and basically in five minutes he gets everyone to agree that Christian was closest to his desk when the rainbow pencil disappeared.

And he has a pattern of theft in our classroom.

He's basically stolen something from everyone.

And I think he's dead.

That's it.

You did your job.

Good job.

So Aditi says, wait, can I ask a question?

I said, absolutely.

Cross-examination.

Go right ahead.

So Aditi says, Eric, did you actually see Christian take your pencil?

And Eric says, no. And I feel like, ooh, like the tenor of the room has suddenly changed.

So Eric leaves the stand and Christian comes up.

He swears on green eggs and ham that he will tell the truth.

And Aditi comes up, and a bold decision.

She says, stand up, Christian, and empty your pockets. So he does.

There's no pencil.

Aditi says, what about your desk?

Penny jumps up.

I'm the investigator.

I will check.

So she runs over.

She dumps his desk.

She searches through it.

No rainbow pencil.

She runs without any instruction to the locker, pulls it open, starts dumping it.

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I'm watching the class.

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Like, all the jurors are taking notes.

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None of these kids ever take notes.

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But now they're taking notes.

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Like, Travis is standing still first time ever.

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He's done this.

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Like, it's questions.

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Like, they're all engaged.

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And I start to realize, like, maybe the problem isn't, like, them.

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Maybe it's me.

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Like, maybe I haven't made line plots engaging enough.

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Like, legitimately, maybe, like, they're so happy right now.

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Maybe I just need to bring this to other things in a more appropriate way.

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Right?

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So we determined the rainbow pencil is nowhere to be found.

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And I'm thinking, Christian's going to get off on this.

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I cannot believe it.

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So, Chant says, I have a couple questions, and I'm like, go right ahead, it's your turn.

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So, he says, Christian, you've taken something from everyone.

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Do you really expect us to believe that you didn't take the rainbow pencil?

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And Christian says, I don't even think Eric had the rainbow pencil today.

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And Chant hears it.

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Chant hears something that I don't hear and you didn't hear either.

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He hears certainty, like unjustified certainty in Christian's voice.

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So he says, how do you know Eric didn't have the rainbow pencil today?

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And Christian says, when I opened Eric's desk to steal his calculator, I did not see the rainbow pencil in the desk.

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The whole class goes quiet.

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It takes Christian nine seconds to figure out what has just happened.

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And we all know the moment because his hands come to his mouth as

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if he can somehow grab those words and stuff them in.

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And that is the picture that the court sketch artist draws of Christian.

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A picture I still have to this day.

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It's chaos for a little while.

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Maya's banging the stapler.

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Staplers are flying everywhere.

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And the jury deliberates instantly, and they determine that Christian is guilty of attempted stealing of a calculator from Eric.

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And I say to Maya, it's your job now to punish him.

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You choose what the punishment is.

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And she says, I need some time to think.

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So we're halfway into a line plot lesson that I'm trying to make more engaging than I ever thought possible.

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When Maya raises her hand and says, I know what to do.

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So the class throws the whole courtroom back together because they want this to end the right way.

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So the jury takes their spots and Travis stands up against the wall.

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Everyone's back where they need to be.

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And Maya's sitting in the front with her gavel, which is the stapler, and I say, all right, Maya, what's the punishment?

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And she says, Mr. Dix, I think that this was punishment enough.

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She says, I don't think that Christian should have been put on trial in front of us, and so I think we've punished him enough.

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And every head in that room nods in agreement with Maya Flores that day.

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But what Maya is really telling me is,

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Mr. Dix, you don't get to quit when things aren't making you happy.

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And you don't get to put us in this position to

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do this thing to this boy on this day as much as he really deserved it.

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Maya is telling me that teachers don't get to say, it's your problem, it's not mine.

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And I'm looking at 23 kids now who about an hour ago I wondered

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if they could ever lead us into the future.

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And I'm looking at Maya Flores and Eric Woods and Christian Paredes and Aditya Nam and Chance Don Barr,

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Travis Workman, and all those kids, kids I taught ten years ago who I remember like it was yesterday.

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I look at them and I think, they are ready right now, better than I am, to take on the future,

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and I cannot wait to see what these kids do.

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Thank you.

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That's Matthew.

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