์‰๋„์ž‰ ์—ฐ์Šต: The Confidence Hack Nobody Tells You ๐Ÿคซ - ์˜์ƒ์œผ๋กœ ์˜์–ด ๋งํ•˜๊ธฐ ๋ฐฐ์šฐ๊ธฐ

์—ฐ์Šต ๋ชจ๋“œ ์„ ํƒ

๊ฐ ๋ชจ๋“œ๋Š” ์ „์ฒด ํ™”๋ฉด ์—ฐ์Šต์‹ค๋กœ ์—ด๋ฆฝ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.

20 ๋ฌธ์žฅ
๋ฌธ์žฅ์ด ๋„ˆ๋ฌด ์งง๊ฑฐ๋‚˜ ๊ธธ๋ฉด Edit๋ฅผ ๋ˆŒ๋Ÿฌ ์กฐ์ •ํ•˜์„ธ์š”.
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If you want to change something in your life, like all these articles that are online saying like, you need to have good posture, you need to speak more freely,
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you need to use more arm movements, you need to do all these things, be comfortable touching somebody else, grabbing somebody by the shoulders, all these things.
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Those are a byproduct of confidence.
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It does not make you confident.
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So what those articles are telling you when they say you need to, here's how to be confident.
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They're giving you symptoms instead of causes.
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If I want to be in a place where I can talk openly and laugh openly in a group like that,
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what is the one shift I have to make mentally to where that laughing just becomes a natural byproduct,
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a symptom of some change that I underwent?
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And typically, 99 times out of 100, the big change that needs to be made in a person is
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I need to be comfortable and completely okay with being socially injured.
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Like I need to stop this fear of judgment.
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I need to stop pretending like we talked about, stop performing for other people and still be nice.
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I can do that without being a dick.
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And that's what in so many people's mind, they have a limiting belief that says, Yeah, but And all of the yeah buts are like, yeah, but I'm a good person, which means I'm going to step.
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I'm going to shrink myself a little bit to make the other person feel more comfortable, which is a lie.
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It's just not real.
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So it's it's a lot about like, can I get out of performing?
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Can I be a good person?
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And can I completely accept that there may be some kind of social injury that happens from this?

์•ฑ ๋‹ค์šด๋กœ๋“œ

์œ ์ฐฝํ•˜๊ฒŒ ๋งํ•˜๋Š” ๋ฐ ํ•„์š”ํ•œ ๋ชจ๋“  ๊ฒƒ

AI ๋ฐœ์Œ ํ‰๊ฐ€๋ฌธ์žฅ๋งˆ๋‹ค ์ ์ˆ˜ ํ™•์ธ
IPA ๋ฐœ์Œ ์—ฐ์Šต๋ชจ๋“  ์†Œ๋ฆฌ ๋งˆ์Šคํ„ฐ
๋‹จ์–ด ํ•™์Šต๋‚˜๋งŒ์˜ ๋‹จ์–ด์žฅ ๋งŒ๋“ค๊ธฐ
๋‹จ์–ด ๊ฒŒ์ž„๋†€๋ฉด์„œ ์™ธ์šฐ๊ธฐ

์ด ๋น„๋””์˜ค๋กœ ๋งํ•˜๊ธฐ ์—ฐ์Šต์„ ํ•˜๋Š” ์ด์œ ๋Š”?

์ด ๋น„๋””์˜ค์—์„œ๋Š” ์ž์‹ ๊ฐ์„ ํ‚ค์šฐ๊ณ , ์ž์—ฐ์Šค๋Ÿฝ๊ฒŒ ๋Œ€ํ™”ํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ๋Š” ๋ฐฉ๋ฒ•์— ๋Œ€ํ•œ ํ†ต์ฐฐ์„ ์ œ๊ณตํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์˜ฌ๋ฐ”๋ฅธ ์ž์„ธ๋ฅผ ์ทจํ•˜๊ณ , ์ž์œ ๋กญ๊ฒŒ ๋งํ•˜๋ฉฐ, ์†์ง“์„ ์‚ฌ์šฉํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ๊ณผ ๊ฐ™์€ ๊ฒ‰์œผ๋กœ ๋ณด์ด๋Š” ํ–‰๋™์€ ์ž์‹ ๊ฐ์˜ ๋ถ€์‚ฐ๋ฌผ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๋”ฐ๋ผ์„œ ์ด ๋น„๋””์˜ค์—์„œ ์ œ๊ณตํ•˜๋Š” ์‹ฌ๋ฆฌ์  ๋ณ€ํ™”์— ์ง‘์ค‘ํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์€ ์˜์–ด ํšŒํ™” ์—ฐ์Šต์— ๋งค์šฐ ์ค‘์š”ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์Šคํ”ผ์น˜ ํ™œ๋™์„ ํ†ตํ•ด ๋Œ€ํ™”์˜ ์‚ฌ์†Œํ•œ ๋ถ€๋ถ„์— ๋Œ€ํ•œ ๋‘๋ ค์›€์„ ์ค„์ด๊ณ , ํŽธ์•ˆํ•˜๊ฒŒ ์†Œํ†ตํ•˜๋Š” ๋Šฅ๋ ฅ์„ ๋ฐฐ์–‘ํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.

๋ฌธ๋งฅ ์†์˜ ๋ฌธ๋ฒ• ๋ฐ ํ‘œํ˜„

์ด ๋น„๋””์˜ค์—์„œ ์‚ฌ์šฉ๋œ ๋ช‡ ๊ฐ€์ง€ ํ•ต์‹ฌ ๊ตฌ์กฐ๋ฅผ ๋ถ„์„ํ•ด ๋ณด๊ฒ ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค:

  • โ€œI need to be comfortable withโ€ฆโ€ โ€“ ์ž์‹ ์˜ ๊ฐ์ •์ด๋‚˜ ์ƒํ™ฉ์— ๋Œ€ํ•ด ํŽธ์•ˆํ•จ์„ ๋А๊ปด์•ผ ํ•œ๋‹ค๋Š” ํ‘œํ˜„์œผ๋กœ, ํƒ€์ธ๊ณผ์˜ ๊ด€๊ณ„์—์„œ ์ค‘์š”ํ•œ ์š”์†Œ๋กœ ์ž‘์šฉํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
  • โ€œI can do that without being a dick.โ€ โ€“ ๊ธ์ •์ ์ธ ์˜๋„๋ฅผ ๊ฐ€์ง„ ํ–‰๋™์„ ์–ธ๊ธ‰ํ•˜๋ฉด์„œ๋„, ์ฃผ๋ณ€ ์‚ฌ๋žŒ๋“ค์„ ์กด์ค‘ํ•˜๋Š” ๋ฐฉ๋ฒ•์„ ๊ฐ•์กฐํ•˜๋Š” ํ‘œํ˜„์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
  • โ€œI have a limiting belief that saysโ€ฆโ€ โ€“ ์ž์‹ ์˜ ์‹ ๋…์ด๋‚˜ ์ž์•„์— ๊ด€ํ•ด ๋…ผ์˜ํ•  ๋•Œ ์œ ์šฉํ•œ ๊ตฌ์กฐ๋กœ, ํ•™์ƒ๋“ค์ด ์ž์‹ ์˜ ์ƒ๊ฐ์„ ํ‘œํ˜„ํ•˜๋Š” ๋ฐ ๋„์›€์„ ์ค๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
  • โ€œCan I get out of performing?โ€ โ€“ ์‚ฌํšŒ์  ์ƒํ™ฉ์—์„œ์˜ ์—ญํ•  ์ˆ˜ํ–‰์—์„œ ๋ฒ—์–ด๋‚˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์— ๋Œ€ํ•œ ์งˆ๋ฌธ์œผ๋กœ, ์ง„์‹ค๋œ ์ž์‹ ์„ ๋“œ๋Ÿฌ๋‚ผ ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ๋Š” ๋ฐฉ๋ฒ•์„ ํƒ๊ตฌํ•˜๊ณ  ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.

๋ฐœ์Œ์˜ ์ผ๋ฐ˜์ ์ธ ํ•จ์ •

๋น„๋””์˜ค ์†์—์„œ ์ฃผ์˜ํ•ด์•ผ ํ•  ๋ช‡ ๊ฐ€์ง€ ๋ฐœ์Œ๊ณผ ์–ต์–‘ ๋ถ€๋ถ„์„ ์‚ดํŽด๋ณด๊ฒ ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค:

  • โ€œconfidentโ€ โ€“ ์ด ๋‹จ์–ด๋Š” ์ข…์ข… /หˆkษ’nfษชdษ™nt/์™€ /หˆkษ‘หnfษชdษ™nt/๋กœ ๋ฐœ์Œ๋˜๋ฉฐ, ๊ฐ๊ฐ ๋‹ค๋ฅธ ์–ต์–‘์„ ๊ฐ€์ง„ ์ง€์—ญ์—์„œ ๋‹ค๋ฅด๊ฒŒ ๋“ค๋ฆด ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์ •ํ™•ํ•œ ๋ฐœ์Œ ์—ฐ์Šต์€ ์˜์–ด ๋ฐœ์Œ ๊ต์ •์— ๋„์›€์ด ๋ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.
  • โ€œjudgmentโ€ โ€“ ์ข…์ข… ์งง๊ฒŒ ๋ฐœ์Œ๋˜๊ธฐ ๋•Œ๋ฌธ์—, ์ •ํ™•ํ•œ ๋ฐœ์Œ์„ ์œ„ํ•ด โ€œ์กฐ๋“œ๋จผํŠธโ€๋ผ๊ณ  ๋ฐœ์Œํ•˜๋„๋ก ์ฃผ์˜ํ•˜์„ธ์š”.
  • โ€œacceptโ€์™€ โ€œexceptโ€์˜ ์ฐจ์ด โ€“ ์ด ๋‘ ๋‹จ์–ด๋Š” ๋ฐœ์Œ์ด ์œ ์‚ฌํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ์˜๋ฏธ๊ฐ€ ๋‹ค๋ฆ…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์˜ฌ๋ฐ”๋ฅธ ์ƒํ™ฉ์— ๋งž๊ฒŒ ์‚ฌ์šฉํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒ๋„ ์ค‘์š”ํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.

์˜์–ด ํšŒํ™” ์—ฐ์Šต๊ณผ ํ•จ๊ป˜ ์ด๋Ÿฌํ•œ ๋ฐœ์Œ ํ•จ์ •์„ ๋ฐ˜๋ณต์ ์œผ๋กœ ์—ฐ์Šตํ•˜์—ฌ ์ž์—ฐ์Šค๋Ÿฝ๊ฒŒ ์ž์‹ ์˜ ๋ฐœ์Œ์„ ๊ฐœ์„ ํ•  ์ˆ˜ ์žˆ์Šต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.

์‰๋„์ž‰์ด๋ž€? ์˜์–ด ์‹ค๋ ฅ์„ ๋น ๋ฅด๊ฒŒ ํ‚ค์šฐ๋Š” ๊ณผํ•™์  ๋ฐฉ๋ฒ•

์‰๋„์ž‰(Shadowing)์€ ์›๋ž˜ ์ „๋ฌธ ํ†ต์—ญ์‚ฌ ํ›ˆ๋ จ์„ ์œ„ํ•ด ๊ฐœ๋ฐœ๋œ ์–ธ์–ด ํ•™์Šต ๊ธฐ๋ฒ•์œผ๋กœ, ๋‹ค์–ธ์–ด ํ•™์ž์ธ Dr. Alexander Arguelles์— ์˜ํ•ด ๋Œ€์ค‘ํ™”๋œ ๋ฐฉ๋ฒ•์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ํ•ต์‹ฌ ์›๋ฆฌ๋Š” ๊ฐ„๋‹จํ•˜์ง€๋งŒ ๋งค์šฐ ๊ฐ•๋ ฅํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค: ์›์–ด๋ฏผ์˜ ์˜์–ด๋ฅผ ๋“ค์œผ๋ฉด์„œ 1~2์ดˆ์˜ ์งง์€ ์ง€์—ฐ์œผ๋กœ ์ฆ‰์‹œ ์†Œ๋ฆฌ ๋‚ด์–ด ๋”ฐ๋ผ ๋งํ•˜๋Š” ๊ฒƒโ€”โ€”๋งˆ์น˜ '๊ทธ๋ฆผ์ž(shadow)'์ฒ˜๋Ÿผ ํ™”์ž๋ฅผ ๋”ฐ๋ผ๊ฐ€๋Š” ๊ฒƒ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ๋ฌธ๋ฒ• ๊ณต๋ถ€๋‚˜ ์ˆ˜๋™์ ์ธ ์ฒญ์ทจ์™€ ๋‹ฌ๋ฆฌ, ์‰๋„์ž‰์€ ๋‡Œ์™€ ์ž… ๊ทผ์œก์ด ๋™์‹œ์— ์‹ค์‹œ๊ฐ„์œผ๋กœ ์˜์–ด๋ฅผ ์ฒ˜๋ฆฌํ•˜๊ณ  ์žฌํ˜„ํ•˜๋„๋ก ํ›ˆ๋ จํ•ฉ๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. ์—ฐ๊ตฌ์— ๋”ฐ๋ฅด๋ฉด ์ด ๋ฐฉ๋ฒ•์€ ๋ฐœ์Œ ์ •ํ™•๋„, ์–ต์–‘, ๋ฆฌ๋“ฌ, ์—ฐ์Œ, ์ฒญ์ทจ๋ ฅ, ๋งํ•˜๊ธฐ ์œ ์ฐฝ์„ฑ์„ ํฌ๊ฒŒ ํ–ฅ์ƒ์‹œํ‚ต๋‹ˆ๋‹ค. IELTS ์Šคํ”ผํ‚น ์ค€๋น„์™€ ์ž์—ฐ์Šค๋Ÿฌ์šด ์˜์–ด ์†Œํ†ต์„ ์›ํ•˜๋Š” ๋ถ„๋“ค์—๊ฒŒ ํŠนํžˆ ํšจ๊ณผ์ ์ž…๋‹ˆ๋‹ค.

์„€๋„์ž‰ ๋ฐฉ๋ฒ•: ๋‹จ๊ณ„๋ณ„ ์ „์ฒด ๊ฐ€์ด๋“œ ์ฝ๊ธฐ โ†’