Shadowing Practice: How to Detach So Fast It Feels Kinda Scary - Learn English Speaking with Video
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What if you could detach so fast that it actually felt scary?
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This is something that actually enlightened people have talked about
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when it comes to understand reality and understanding how quickly our life can shift
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and how we feel can shift when we begin to shift our consciousness.
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Now, what enlightened people have said is
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that the idea of reality itself is something that has no inherent meaning in it whatsoever,
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which means that whatever attachment you have, it literally only has power because you believe it has power.
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And what enlightened people talk about is how even the idea of enlightenment is a joke
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because ultimately we are that which we've been seeking.
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You don't attain enlightenment.
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It is something you realize once you let go of all the attachments you've had.
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Literally, it's just a letting go of resistance.
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If you were to imagine a cork on the top of the ocean,
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just bobbing along, and then you would have put pressure underneath it and say, how does it get back to the surface of the ocean?
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You don't have to raise it back up.
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All you do is let go of the resistance and it naturally comes back up.
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Well, in a very similar way, things in our life only have meaning if we believe it has meaning.
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In this video, what I'm going to show you is the deeper roots of what your attachment is.
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I'm going to show you how to finally let it go
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so that you can also be in a nervous system regulated state.
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I believe you will see a complete transformation in the way that you carry yourself simply because you watched this today.
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Now, the first thing that I want you to understand about this, and this is something that when you begin to understand,
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you see your attachments differently.
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And that is first off, what is attachment?
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Attachment, what the Buddha said, was attachment is the root of all suffering.
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Now the attachment is something that we cling onto because of a certain result or a certain outcome we want.
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And what happens is this thing that we cling onto creates resistance.
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So when you think of it, what your attachment really is, is a nervous system regulation mechanism.
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That's what the attachment is.
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You might look at the person that you're attached to, the identity you're attached to, the outcome you're attached to,
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and you might think that the meaning is that thing is what you're attached to.
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That thing is not what you're attached to.
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It's the belief that that thing will regulate your nervous system.
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So if there was some form of unfamiliar or uncomfortable emotion there, as a way to avoid feeling that emotion,
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or a way to regulate that emotion, there's this subconscious energy that says, if I have that person, that identity, that outcome, et cetera,
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the status, whatever it is, then I can feel safe inside of myself.
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I don't have to feel the other emotions that are coming up.
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Now the challenge is that then we become someone that's fighting with reality.
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We become someone that's attached to the external
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because the belief is that the external is gonna change how we feel on the internal.
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This is something I realized recently about myself
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when I was looking at all the patterns I've shed over the last like couple of years.
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I was able to see like, oh wow, like four or five years ago when I was more in like a,
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what you could call a people pleasing pattern, or it was common to want to please people and to say yes,
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when I really meant no or something like that, there was an attachment to other people seeing me as a good person.
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There was an attachment to not wanting them to feel tension because if they felt tension, then I would have to feel tension too,
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because it felt like my responsibility.
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And of course this was just an old pattern, but that old pattern came with it as a way to regulate the nervous system.
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So there were certain attachments from that pattern.
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Now, what is a very powerful thought experiment to do to understand this?
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Is to understand first off, you might be in survival and survival might feel familiar to be attached.
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Now, I want to use this example, and this is a very simple example
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that I think will paint the picture of the difference between survival and being good either way.
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Imagine that right now there is a two foot line in your room that is like this big, whatever two feet is.
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And all you have to do is walk that line.
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What you'll find is that it's very easy for you to do.
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It's very calm for you to do.
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Now imagine that that two feet is on the top of a building.
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Imagine it's on like the Empire State Building and it's going to another building and you have to walk that two feet.
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All of a sudden there's an activated nervous system.
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Why?
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Because the risks have been increased.
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Even though it's so easy for you to walk in your room like this, Now, what is called importance has been increased.
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And when importance is increased, there is a fear there.
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And that fear puts you in survival.
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That fear then creates attachment.
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So the point in me sharing with you this is understanding this power that we have behind what we make important, what we value.
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And if we really value someone else and believe that we need their approval or validation, if we really value a certain outcome,
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what happens is we're then creating resistance around that.
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This idea, I think, can completely shift the way you view it too.
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If you imagine that everything in our reality is about energetic resonance, If you imagine you really,
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really want something, you put that thing on a pedestal.
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And when that thing is on a pedestal, you are not equal to it.
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It is not natural for you to experience it. So resistance is created.
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And what that resistance does is it actually blocks you from experiencing it.
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Now the reason I share this with you when it comes to detaching
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and understanding that that this is something that when you begin to understand the energy mechanisms that are here,
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you begin to realize something deeper about it.
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And that is that it is all projection.
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It is all projecting of what is important.
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And that's really what this is about.
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It's about understanding what are we making important?
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Are we making it an important what someone else is doing? how someone else views us, a certain outcome.
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And if we make it important and we value that thing and we place what is called excess importance onto it,
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it's like more importance than it naturally is, we create resistance.
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And remember, the key to this process is recognizing you are already the love, joy, peace, and enlightenment you are seeking.
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That's ultimately what enlightenment is.
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It's a letting go and an emptiness from attachment.
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And like the enlightened people say, attachment is the root of all suffering and the idea of enlightenment isn't something you attain.
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It is something you naturally are.
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Well, in a similar way, when it comes to attachment, I believe because we're all one consciousness,
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because we're all connected, when we are in the attachment and trying to control, we're literally just holding the cork underneath the ocean.
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We're trying to manage something.
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And what we're really trying to manage is our nervous system.
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So one of the first things to this process to understand and one of the major shifts for you
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can be to first off follow this three -step process
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that I'm about to share with you that I think is the deeper aspect
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that will allow you to begin actually processing this information to then see that you literally are a new version of you.
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And that has to do with allowing yourself to understand
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that everything in life has no fundamental built -in meaning other than the meaning you give it.
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You know, it's interesting.
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Back in the day, I used to do something in high school called forensics debate,
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where I would go to debate tournaments and I would get to argue different points.
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And there was like topics and there'd be competitions
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and I would go against other kids and there'd be judges there and I had to write cases.
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And the one really interesting thing that I learned is that I had to write cases for both affirmative and negative,
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which means I didn't get to pick my side.
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I might do four or five debate, like people go, I go against that day and I might go affirmative,
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affirmative, negative, whatever, which means I had to fight for a topic or against the topic and I didn't get to choose.
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Now what's interesting is what I learned from this is that you can make a case either way.
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And ultimately it's all dependent on the perspective.
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So nothing has any fundamental meaning.
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It's just literally a different way of looking at something.
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And there are times that I would be for something.
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And then all of a sudden I would learn more about the idea and be like, actually I'm against this.
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I would begin understanding and I could see how both are true.
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Now, what happens with that of detaching, it's understanding that this person that you're attached to, this thing that you're attached to,
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it's literally simply because the meaning you're projecting onto it.
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Like if you were to imagine something you're attached to and you become aware of the story you tell yourself about it,
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even like a specific person that you might be attached to, What deeper you might be attached to is the way you feel
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when you're around them because of what they reflect back to you.
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Maybe they reflect something back to you
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that allows you to calm your nervous system
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or you aspire to be more like them or the story of what you tell yourself.
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It means that they are with you.
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You see, this is important to understand that that meaning can change
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and I'm not telling you to then see them as negative and bad if you're trying to let go of them.
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I'm just saying, be more curious about like the story you're telling yourself
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and understanding that ultimately when you give something up to the divine, you really are good either way.
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So this is really the goal of his videos to get to a place to where you're good either way,
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because you allow yourself to trust the divine, to trust God.
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Attachment is something our ego clings to as a form of nervous system regulation.
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It's a way that says, if I do this, this, this, then I can feel this.
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Even if what you've been feeling, by the way, is familiar.
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You might be like, that doesn't make sense, Aaron.
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I'm like attracting narcissistic or controlling people or certain type of dynamics I don't want.
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But the payoff you might get is you might get to stay in familiar energy.
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And sometimes the energy that you're familiar with is the energy
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that you tend to cling to because your mind literally is like,
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the neurons in your mind literally have been wired to see reality a certain way.
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And it takes a lot of thought and energy to let go of something that has been so familiar.
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So recognize inside of yourself first off, if you're seeing this right now,
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take it as a sign that it is time to start putting the energy inwards.
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because ultimately what you can begin doing is instead use this simple three -step process
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that I think can completely transform your life.
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Now, the first step is to simply notice what comes up.
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Notice what you're feeling.
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Notice the attachment.
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Where is it in your body?
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Where do you feel that pattern in your body?
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And it's almost like you're at a park bench sitting, watching the people walk by, watching the trees, watching the birds, whatever.
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You're neutral.
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One of the biggest shifts in your life can be simply learning to observe the thoughts
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you're having instead of react to them.
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Let them be there.
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Instead of trying to control them and thinking I need to not think bad thoughts.
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You see, there's good thoughts and bad thoughts.
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And if you think bad thoughts, you're gonna manifest something bad.
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Resistance, resistance, resistance.
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If you can be neutral with whether the thoughts come up or not, you'll be more free.
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And then ironically, those thoughts begin to go away because you're not attaching, creating resistance that keeps it held in your consciousness.
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So the first step to this is simply observe how you feel, observe what's coming up.
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And instead of going into the pattern of the attachment, which is normally a protective mechanism,
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you observe the feeling and then you actually do this next step which can change everything.
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You welcome it in.
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Welcome in the sensation that's underneath the surface.
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Welcome it, allow it in, let it in, because this is a way to not let that emotion in.
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And that emotion might be the fear of what if I don't get what I want?
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You see, a very powerful thing to begin becoming at peace with energy within yourself is accepting
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and imagining actually the opposite of what you want.
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So if you're like, well, my fear is that I'm gonna be alone forever.
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Literally imagine being alone forever.
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Now a big part of this is that you put
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so much power and energy and meaning onto this idea of being alone forever and you're afraid of it.
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So this other thing becomes this, this thing that you need and you get attached to.
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But if you can become at peace with acknowledging, observing those emotions and letting yourself actually feel what comes up,
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what you'll find is you start to process that energy.
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You develop a new relationship with yourself.
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And what happens is when you begin to develop this relationship with yourself, you're no longer trying to control outcomes.
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You're no longer afraid.
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of what is happening because you learn how to trust your own ability to feel emotion
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and your own ability to feel in connection to spirit or God.
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So welcome in the sensation, actually let it in.
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And then what happens is you can then focus on heart coherence, focusing the energy inside of your heart, creating mind and heart coherence,
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just bringing the energy inside of your heart.
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And notice how you feel when you do this.
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This is really about creating an energy of appreciation an energy of connection, an energy of being able to observe your thoughts,
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attachments, etc. and understanding that everything you want you already have.
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It's just you believe that you need those things in order to feel the emotions
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but you already have the ability to feel connected.
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You already have the ability to feel gratitude.
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You can feel those emotions now
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and the thing with letting go in detaching fast is through the awareness
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that you're waking up from a dream right now
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that dream is the importance
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and power you give to this over here the identity person belief etc
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so values is really in a very important part of this process becoming aware of your values
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when you begin to value vulnerability and feeling what comes up
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when you begin to value authenticity
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and you begin to choose your values what happens is then you recognize
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that the outside world is something
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that becomes a new filter a new way you relate but
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if subconsciously as a kid you didn't receive validation
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or approval you might subconsciously value that and these things become ways in
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which to regulate your nervous system
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so there's more of a chooser identity you begin to embody when you are choosing the meaning.
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You are choosing to feel.
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You are choosing to allow in what priorly may have been avoided.
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You see, when I learned about this, my whole entire life transformed.
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There was an idea I learned that had to do with something called decreasing importance,
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where you take something off a pedestal and you begin to be good either way with how things happen, you're more neutral.
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Not more neutral just to get what you want, but you're more neutral from the point of like, you get to choose what things mean.
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You can choose what things meant in the past.
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You can even reframe things that happened in the past.
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That reframing relieves the energy of the past.
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That's why some of the most powerful healing people go through is when they reframe something that happened in the past.
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They give it a new meaning.
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Think about me and my life with the whole controlling ex step parent thing, reframing that and realizing that led me to a spiritual awakening.
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And I might not be doing what I'm doing in the world, living the life of my dreams.
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If it weren't for that situation, it reframed the meaning and that completely transformed my life.
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And also I'd say more recently, I've been reframing the meaning more around allowing the divine to flow through me.
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How can I become more of a vessel of a greater energy so that I can get into a flow state
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and I can allow my heart to open more?
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And that when I'm in that state, I don't have to, I don't have to control reality.
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I can feel what emotions come up.
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I can realize I don't have to manage it because there's a divine energy.
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And this is why when I run live events and stuff,
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it's like I just show up with the intention of adding value and being present with people.
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And it's like the ideas come, the people raise their hand, like it just becomes this perfect orchestration of energy.
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But when I try to control to get a certain outcome, that's when I create attachment.
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That's when there's resistance.
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So you can detach so fast it literally feels scary because you are literally embodying more of the unknown.
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You are stepping into a new version of you.
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And when you look back in a few months from now, if you simply focus on embracing more of a connection with the divine,
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if you simply focus on noticing your attachments, welcoming it, even reframing the meaning if need be,
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but also feeling the heart's coherence in your body, that's when your life will change in a very powerful way.
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One of the most popular meditations I have on YouTube is specifically on feeling love and heart coherence.
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And literally there are thousands of comments from people
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that say they've attracted love or great opportunities in their life from doing a kind of meditation that does that.
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So I have a meditation that is on raising your dominant vibration permanently.
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Watch this meditation, listen to it for 21 days and watch what happens to your energy.
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Vocabulary and speaking notes for this lesson
This speaking lesson is built on the video “How to Detach So Fast It Feels Kinda Scary”. The speaker keeps coming back to these words: attachment, energy, begin, meaning, attached. This video has 241 sentences and 3229 words to shadow. The speech runs for 19:54. The speaker talks at a natural 162 words per minute, close to everyday conversation. 87% of the words are among the 3,000 most common in English, so the vocabulary is easy to follow.
Key vocabulary in this video
15 words from the video worth learning, with pronunciation and meaning:
| Word | Pronunciation | Meaning |
|---|---|---|
| attachment noun | /əˈtæt͡ʃmənt/ | The act or process of (physically or figuratively) attaching. |
| attach verb | /əˈtæt͡ʃ/ | To fasten, to join to (literally and figuratively). |
| emotion noun | /ɪˈməʊ.ʃən/ | A person's internal state of being and involuntary physiological response to an object or a situation, based on or tied to physical state and sensory data. |
| outcome noun | /ˈaʊtkʌm/ | That which is produced or occurs as a result of an event or process. |
| observe verb | /əbˈzɜːv/ | To notice or view, especially carefully or with attention to detail. |
| divine adjective | /dɪˈvaɪn/ | Of or pertaining to a god. |
| neutral adjective | /ˈnuː.tɹəl/ | Not taking sides in a conflict such as war; nonaligned. |
| regulate verb | /ˈɹɛɡ.jə.leɪt/ | To dictate policy. |
| enlightenment noun | /ɪnˈlaɪtənmənt/ | An act of enlightening, or the state of being enlightened or instructed. |
| survival noun | /sɚˈvaɪ.vəl/ | The fact or act of surviving; continued existence or life. |
| meditation noun | /mɛdɪˈteɪʃn̩/ | A devotional exercise of, or leading to, contemplation. |
| topic noun | /ˈtɑpɪk/ | A subject; a theme; a category or general area of interest. |
| naturally adverb | /ˈnæt͡ʃ.(ə.)ɹə.li/ | In a natural manner. |
| belief noun | /bɪˈliːf/ | Mental acceptance of a claim as true. |
| mechanism noun | /ˈmɛk.ə.nɪ.zəm/ | Any mechanical means for the conversion or control of motion, or the transmission or control of power. |
Phrasal verbs you will hear
| Word | Meaning |
|---|---|
| come up verb | To emerge or become known, especially unexpectedly. |
| back up verb | To move backwards, especially for a vehicle to do so. |
| get back to verb | Return to (an activity) |
| go away verb | To depart or leave a place. |
| go through verb | To travel from one end of something to the other. |
Sentences worth repeating
Short, complete lines from the video that you can reuse in everyday conversation:
- What if you could detach so fast that it actually felt scary?
- You don't have to raise it back up.
- It's about understanding what are we making important?
- Where is it in your body?
- Where do you feel that pattern in your body?
Grammar in this video
The structures the speaker uses most, with the exact words from the video:
| Structure | In the video |
|---|---|
| Present perfect continuous have/has been + -ing — an action that started earlier and is still going on | we've been seeking · I've been reframing |
| Passive voice be + past participle — the focus is on what happens, not who does it | is let · be attached · have been increased |
| Present perfect have/has + past participle — a past action that still matters now | have talked · have said · you've had |
| Relative clauses who / which + clause — extra information about a person or thing | whatever, which means · attachment, which is · step which can |
Pronunciation to watch
The speaker uses 73 contractions and reduced forms, such as you're, I'm, don't. Say them the short way, as you hear them.
- The “th” sounds: underneath /ˌʌndɚˈniθ/, authenticity /ɑθɛnˈtɪsɪti/
- The “sh” and “zh” sounds: emotion /ɪˈməʊ.ʃən/, meditation /mɛdɪˈteɪʃn̩/, tension /ˈtɛnʃən/, consciousness /ˈkɑnʃəsnəs/, regulation /ˌɹɛɡjʊˈleɪʃən/
- Long words — get the stress right: enlightenment /ɪnˈlaɪtənmənt/, naturally /ˈnæt͡ʃ.(ə.)ɹə.li/, mechanism /ˈmɛk.ə.nɪ.zəm/, affirmative /əˈfɝməɾɪv/, regulation /ˌɹɛɡjʊˈleɪʃən/
How to practise with this video
- Listen to the whole video once without speaking and note the words you do not know.
- Start at 0.75× speed, shadow it sentence by sentence, then go back to normal speed once it feels easy.
- Record yourself and compare with the original, paying attention to words like attachment, attach, emotion.
What is the Shadowing Technique?
Shadowing is a science-backed language learning technique originally developed for professional interpreter training and popularized by polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. The method is simple but powerful: you listen to native English audio and immediately repeat it out loud — like a shadow following the speaker with just a 1–2 second delay. Unlike passive listening or grammar drills, shadowing forces your brain and mouth muscles to simultaneously process and reproduce real speech patterns. Research shows it significantly improves pronunciation accuracy, intonation, rhythm, connected speech, listening comprehension, and speaking fluency — making it one of the most effective methods for IELTS Speaking preparation and real-world English communication.