Shadowing Practice: I Have No Friends - Learn English Speaking with Video
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It's Saturday at 6 p.m
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and I'm sitting alone in my apartment at
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my desk staring at my computer like 99.999% of every other Saturday.
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And I went to get a pizza, because I still don't know how to eat right,
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and, you know, Dartmouth is graduated or graduating,
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and this always happens when I drive in on the weekend to get my unhealthy food
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that I eat alone in my apartment, and I see all of them.
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all of the Dartmouth students in their really cute outfits, walking around downtown, holding hands,
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walking down to the river to swim, walking to their apartment, sitting out on the green with friends,
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stuff to do, or going back to their dorm so they can probably do stuff later because it's a Saturday,
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and I get my pizza and I go back to my apartment because I don't have any friends.
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And honestly, I don't think I've ever had friends, not like real friends.
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I mean, obviously, I had like friends in high school and college, but it was the most superficial level.
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if I was in class, I would have people to talk to.
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People liked me.
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I don't think I was a totally unlikable person.
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And I would do after school activities and people would talk to me.
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And I had people that I was close to.
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But we never did anything besides that.
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I never did anything after school in high school.
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If I did, it was it was rare.
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Like the times, like prom, mom had to ask a friend's son to ask me,
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and then he left early with another girl, which at the time I thought was hilarious.
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Because I could tell a story to my friends, and maybe that would be interesting.
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I haven't spoken to any of them in person
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I'll see them on Instagram but we've never hung out with any of my friends from high school
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same thing with college I mean, I started senior year but the second people started doing stuff on the weekends
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I was always alone in my dorm room watching all the other kids walk to the parties.
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I've never had a friend that I would just spend time with and tell everything to.
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I really thought I got close with Caitlin and Molly and Katrina and Aaron.
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And I've- it's been two years, I haven't made a single friend, and there was a girl who went on Bumble,
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but I never went anywhere and she moved.
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And you know what?
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It's my fault.
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Because, you know, I complain about not having anyone,
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but the minute anyone does come to my life and I have a chance, I do nothing with it.
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she made me over to her apartment and we ate.
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I couldn't talk to her, but every time she texted me, I would wait like a day to respond, and when we made plans, I would always feel awkward about it,
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because all I wanted to do was be back in my apartment, but then I'm in my apartment, I'm alone.
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So it's like, what the fuck is wrong with me that I complain about this,
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and then I make no effort to try to change it.
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I mean, ever since I started applying to grad school, I gave up and tried to make friends here.
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And it's noticeable my landlord, Elaine, keeps commenting on how all of her past tenants do things on the weekends,
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basically calling me like a friendless loser, which is true, but like to hear her just say that to me was really hard.
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And that's why I feel like, you know, I mentioned earlier that I'm about to enter my mid-20s
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and I feel like I have no experiences or social skills.
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it's not just that I don't have no it's that I feel like I'm delayed
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by the time I do make friends it's just gonna be so late for me
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I don't even get into relationships I mean that's the same story but I feel like that's a
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whole fucking other mess you know everyone tells me I'm young and I have time But it's still hard. So gross.
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I'm sorry.
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I didn't...
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I knew I was emotional.
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I didn't get crying like this.
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I just don't know what's wrong with me.
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That I can't make it work.
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That I'm just lazy when it comes to making friends.
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I just want it to be easy, you know?
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When you just find that person that you're with all the time.
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And again, I'm not talking romantically.
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And it's been hard, especially with mom and dad, because before I would just talk to them because I had no one else.
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But now with all the divorce stuff, there's stuff I can't talk to them about and I have no one-
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and Travis and Kyle are too emotional and I can't talk to anyone.
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I just look at myself and I don't know.
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I'm wasting all these days.
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I just feel so lonely.
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I'm just so lonely.
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All the time.
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But I'm also terrified of it.
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And I also want to be alone.
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Maybe I'm just meant to be alone.
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Maybe some people are meant to just be alone.
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And I just feel like I'm expected to have people.
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Like when I picture my future, I see what I want.
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But when I think what's actually gonna happen, I see myself being that woman.
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in her 40s who never found anybody
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so I like I don't know like I adopt a kid or like get like IVF or something like I don't
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there's anything wrong with that but like I don't see myself meeting anyone and having the kids and friends
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I'd like those things but I don't think I'm gonna get it and Travis and Kyle will I know they will
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and I'll be the older sister who's getting constantly lapped in life
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by her younger siblings and I'm so happy for them and I'm not I'm not resentful.
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I'm happy.
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They deserve to be happy, but...
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You're supposed to look up to your older sibling.
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And I genuinely don't know what they have to look up to me for.
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They made more friends.
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They had more relationships.
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Travis is already in a better, higher paying job.
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They've traveled more.
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They've done more.
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They've experienced more.
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What do they have to look up to me for?
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Now I'm just pitying myself.
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It looks so fucking depressing.
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I feel like stuff has to change, but I don't know.
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Once I move back to Hampton, how to change it?
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How do we make friends?
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I don't know how to make friends, but I'm scared.
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I just want to run into somebody.
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I hate meeting people online.
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It's so awkward.
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And you put all this into a conversation, but when you meet someone, you don't have that I feel like I need to meet people.
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I need to meet people, but I don't know how and I don't think it's possible as an adult to just run into people.
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And I'm just gonna be sitting at home like I did all through high school.
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I think I'm a good person.
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I think I have a lot to offer.
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I just...
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I don't know how to make myself try.
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I don't know how to make myself more invested.
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I want someone text to text back immediately and to just be excited about plans of their last minute
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and to not say oh i want my alone time
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when i'm alone all the time i think this is why it made me drink a lot on the weekends
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because i'm not drinking tonight i had a coke when i went to get a pizza
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really look at me I don't know why I'm talking Wow,
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this has been so great.
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People keep saying it'll happen.
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You know, when I was in middle school, they said high school and high school.
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They said college and college and real life and how I'm here.
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I think people are running out of excuses to tell me about why I'm stuck in this place.
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And there's no one to be mad at by myself.
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I can't be mad at other people.
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I can't be mad at the world.
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I'm mad at myself.
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Because I don't try.
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I really don't.
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And then I get so mad.
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It's like I'm just so terrified.
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It's the same thing with work.
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I'm so terrified that I'll fuck it up, then I don't do anything at all.
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And then, of course, if you don't do anything at all, then it happens.
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So it's like trying to avoid that fear.
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I'm just ensuring that the fear will happen.
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I mean, when I move back to Hampton, I really I gotta, I really gotta step it up.
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I gotta join all those student organizations at Simmons.
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I gotta get a job and talk to the people.
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I gotta be on Bumble BFF.
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I gotta join groups.
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I have to do, I have to try.
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and I feel like that's really going to be the test.
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I think the past couple years have been hard,
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but I think that if I don't fix it in the next year when I'm back in Hampton,
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I think that's just going to be who I am because, I don't know.
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I just feel like, like I said before, 20 to 23, early 20s,
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24 to 26 or mid-20s, 27 to 29 or late 20s.
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I'm about to enter my mid-20s without ever having a solid friend.
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And that needs to fucking change.
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Either that, either that needs to change or I need to just be okay with it.
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I either need to start making friends or just accept the fact that I'm
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gonna be this alone person
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and just come to terms with being like the cool aunt the way Janie is to Ellen
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and all and you know Kelly and Ryan and Connor
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that I'll just be the cool aunt for Travis
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and Kyle like I either have to change my habits
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or just accept the habits I already have
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and I think I'm gonna give it another year of the first option and then after that we'll talk about acceptance.
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In the meantime, I'm just going to sit here the rest of the night,
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watch some reaction videos on Patreon, or do more of my Wikipedia rabbit hole research.
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That is for nothing more than my own boredom and curiosity.
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And then I'll get up tomorrow and continue to pack up my apartment.
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Yay me!
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Real-Life Scenario: Loneliness and Self-Reflection
The video captures a raw, relatable moment of someone sharing their struggle with loneliness on a Saturday evening. They describe feeling isolated while watching others socialize, reflecting on past superficial friendships, and questioning their own role in maintaining connections. This dialogue is rich with natural, conversational English—perfect for english speaking practice as it mirrors real emotions and everyday speech patterns.
Useful Chunks & Collocations
- "superficial level" – Describes shallow connections (e.g., "We only talked on a superficial level").
- "spend time with and tell everything to" – Expresses deep, trusting friendship (e.g., "I need a friend I can spend time with and tell everything to").
- "make no effort to try to change it" – Admits inaction (e.g., "I complain, but I make no effort to try to change it").
- "delayed by the time" – Feels behind in life stages (e.g., "I’m delayed by the time I figure this out").
- "feel awkward about it" – Describes social discomfort (e.g., "I feel awkward about making plans").
Your Shadowing Challenge
Practice the shadowing technique with 1-minute clips of the video. Here’s how: Play a short segment, pause, then repeat it aloud immediately, matching the speaker’s tone, speed, and pronunciation. Focus on phrases like "what the fuck is wrong with me" (casual emphasis) and "it's noticeable my landlord" (natural pauses). This helps improve English pronunciation and fluency—key for IELTS speaking practice. After 5 rounds, record yourself and compare. Notice how "shadow speak" (copying the speaker) trains your mouth to form natural sounds. Do this daily, and you’ll build confidence in conversational English.
Grammar in this video
The structures the speaker uses most, with the exact words from the video:
| Structure | In the video |
|---|---|
| Present perfect have/has + past participle — a past action that still matters now | I've ever had · haven't spoken · we've never hung |
| Passive voice be + past participle — the focus is on what happens, not who does it | is graduated · are meant |
| Verb + -ing enjoy, keep, stop… + -ing — verbs that are followed by the -ing form | started applying · keeps commenting · hate meeting |
| Future with “going to” be going to + verb — a plan or something you can see coming | gonna be · gonna happen · gonna get |
What is the Shadowing Technique?
Shadowing is a science-backed language learning technique originally developed for professional interpreter training and popularized by polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. The method is simple but powerful: you listen to native English audio and immediately repeat it out loud — like a shadow following the speaker with just a 1–2 second delay. Unlike passive listening or grammar drills, shadowing forces your brain and mouth muscles to simultaneously process and reproduce real speech patterns. Research shows it significantly improves pronunciation accuracy, intonation, rhythm, connected speech, listening comprehension, and speaking fluency — making it one of the most effective methods for IELTS Speaking preparation and real-world English communication.