ฝึกพูดภาษาอังกฤษด้วยเทคนิค Shadowing จากวิดีโอ: the paradox of being ambitious but lazy
C1
I want to do everything, so I do nothing.
295 ประโยค
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1
I want to do everything, so I do nothing.
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I know you.
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You think you're gonna do something great with your life.
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Young.
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Ambitious.
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I know because there are 16 taps open in your browser right now.
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That New Yorker article.
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The sourdough recipe you never got around to.
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Your conversation with chat about the pros and cons of going to law school.
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The flights to Japan.
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You keep clicking between them.
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You keep promising yourself you'll come back to each one.
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But you don't.
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I know because you tried to read two pages of Crime and Punishment and gave up after 10 minutes.
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Again.
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I know because last night at some point you ended up on the floor rotting.
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I know because the list of lives you want to live keeps getting longer.
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Writer, lawyer, chef, C-suite exec,
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someone who can speak Chinese,
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French, and Italian, someone who bakes pastries in the south of France.
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Here's the thing.
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I've spent most of this year wanting things.
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I've wanted to write a book.
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I've wanted to start a company.
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I've wanted a different version of my apartment.
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I've wanted to film.
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And in all those wantings,
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I was very productive in my head.
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The actual gym attendance is a different story.
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The page has a bookmark on page 47 that hasn't moved since February.
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The apartment looks the same, maybe even worse.
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I still burn my chicken and my Chinese has disintegrated to the level of a six-month-old.
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The truth is, since college, options have only multiplied.
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Every life I scroll past looks possible.
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Social media makes all these lives feel close enough to touch but too far to actually reach.
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So how are we supposed to choose?
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I am addicted to the feeling of being motivated.
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There's this adrenaline, this high,
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this buzz that comes when you get a new idea in your head
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and suddenly I can see how my life is supposed to go.
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Every time I get a new idea,
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the first 48 hours are a blur.
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It feels like the best version of me has arrived.
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I start a new Notion page.
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I pour my heart out onto this freaking page.
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I imagine the first day of doing it,
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the first week, how it feels when I finally accomplish the idea.
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And I lay it out beautifully in my own head.
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And the dreaming feels like working.
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That's a trick.
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the mapping out, the planning, the imagining.
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I'm genuinely productive in those 48 hours.
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I'm producing dopamine and not much else.
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Then it gets hard.
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You have to sit down and maybe write the draft for the millionth time.
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You need to go to the gym when it's freezing and you just wanna stay inside and order a burrito.
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By the end of the week,
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the energy that I had on Monday has completely been depleted.
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And then the dream dies.
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But when I say I'm doing nothing,
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I'm not actually doing nothing.
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I'm scrolling TikTok.
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I'm watching the people who are doing the things that I said I was going to do.
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I'm watching them shoot their videos in their penthouse apartments.
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I'm watching them ride the hajong loop.
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I'm watching them live the life that I planned so perfectly in my head 48 hours ago.
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My eyes are open.
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My phone is hot.
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The dream is still in there somewhere.
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It's just being pummeled hour by hour by the spectacle of other people doing it instead.
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And that's a cycle that I keep getting trapped in.
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The dreaming, the dying, the rotting.
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Every few weeks, new idea, same arc.
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And here's what I think is underneath it.
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The dreaming is escape.
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The first 48 hours of a new idea are rare hours where I don't feel like I'm trapped in my own life.
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I'm not in this apartment with this body with the same routine
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that I've been doing day after day it feels like a
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new world a new possibility a new path has opened up there is a gap
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that exists in all of us the version of us
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that imagines and the one
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that does i've tried a few explanations for this i've done
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a little bit of research none of them are wrong
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but none of them feel quite right either
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so i want to walk through it and talk with you guys about my findings and just my thoughts on
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feeling stuck and what that actually means.
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Here's what people usually say.
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This is their stereotypical advice.
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They will tell you that it's decision paralysis.
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You have too many options.
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It's modern life.
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The world has gotten too big and the choices have gotten too many and the brain cannot pick.
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They will reference Sylvia Plath.
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Like every Tumblr turned subset girl,
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this quote will be pinned to the Pinterest.
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Esther sees her life branching out before her like a fig tree
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and on every branch is a different version of who she might become.
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A husband in a happy home,
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a famous poet, an editor in Europe,
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an Olympic lady crew champion.
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She wants every fig, but choosing one means losing all the rest.
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So she sits in the crook of the tree,
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starving to death, while the figs wrinkle and go black and drop one by one to the ground at her feet.
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It is a beautiful and terrible passage,
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and it's somehow on every 20-something-year-old's mood board.
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They will quote that passage and tell you that's why you can't move.
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That's a perfect visualization of it.
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They will also tell you to just start.
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Take the first step.
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Done is better than perfect.
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They will tell you discipline is the answer.
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They will reference grit and willpower in that one study about marshmallows.
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They will tell you to choose joy.
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Pick the thing that lights you up.
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Trust your intuition.
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Your authentic self knows what's best.
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I have read all of these.
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I followed all of these.
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None of them have actually fixed it.
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Not because the advice is wrong exactly,
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but because the advice assumes a few things that doesn't seem to be true.
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The first thing it assumes is that I don't know to just start.
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I do, but knowing doesn't actually fix it.
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The second assumes that being stuck is just one thing with one fix.
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Stuck is not one thing.
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I have come to realize that feeling stuck isn't one thing.
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It's around four.
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They overlap, they feel similar,
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but they have completely different exits.
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Now let's talk about what Stuck is.
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The first one, too many options.
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This is the fig tree,
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the version where the world has too many possibilities and every choice forecloses the other.
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Pick the editor in Europe and you don't get the husband and kids.
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Pick the husband and kids and you don't get the famous poet.
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So you sit at the bottom of the tree and just watch the figs rot.
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This version of Stuck, it's real.
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I think we've all felt it,
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but I think it's much rarer than we make it out to be.
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Most of the time, what we call too many options isn't actually that.
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It's comfort we don't want to leave.
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It's the relationship that's fine but going nowhere.
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The job that we've been meaning to quit for two years.
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That Sunday night where we said we would finally start writing the book but just watch Law and Order instead.
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Or maybe it's a refusal that we haven't really admitted to ourselves yet.
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When we said that we really wanted this thing in life
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but for some reason we just never seem to have time for it or get around to it.
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Or maybe it's just the rumination and the loop
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and the overthinking in our brain that just keeps going
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and going in circles before we could even get to the picking part.
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These are three different conditions and they're all living under this choice metaphor.
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All of them are not a problem of options,
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which is why the standard advice,
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just pick one, pick the one that lights you up,
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trust your gut, often doesn't actually land.
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This advice is built for a version of stuck where decision is the actual problem.
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But most of the time,
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decision isn't the problem at all.
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The second one, too much comfort.
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There's a 19th century Russian novel called Oblomov.
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Oblomov?
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I'm butchering that.
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It's about a young nobleman who,
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over the course of hundreds of pages,
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cannot get out of bed.
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Not because he has too many options,
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but because his bed is warm,
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his apartment is quiet, his life is fine.
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The cost-benefit of doing anything looks bad.
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The Russian critic who reviewed it coined a term for this.
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Oblomovism.
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The seductive pull of complacency.
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And I think this is a version of Stuck that gets misdiagnosed as a fig tree the most.
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People say, I have too many options,
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when what they actually have is too much comfort.
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The exit isn't choosing between options,
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it's choosing to get out of bed.
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The third one, a quiet refusal.
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There is a story by Herman Melville called Bartleby the Scrivener.
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Bartleby is a clerk in a 19th century Wall Street law office.
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His job is copying legal documents by hand.
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He's good at it.
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But then one day, his boss asks him to proofread a document.
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Bartleby looks up and says,
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I would prefer not to.
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The boss is confused and he lets it go.
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But the next time, same response.
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Then Bartleby stops copying altogether.
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Then he stops leaving the office.
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He sleeps there.
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He barely eats.
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The boss tries reason.
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He tries threats.
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He tries offering money.
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Nothing works.
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Bartleby keeps saying, I would prefer not to.
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He never raises his voice.
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He never gives a reason.
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He doesn't argue.
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He just refuses.
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The boss eventually moves the entire firm to a different building to escape him.
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Bartleby stays.
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He gets arrested for vagrancy.
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He dies in prison, still refusing to eat.
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He wasn't depressed in any way.
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He wasn't paralyzed by abundance.
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He was refusing.
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And his refusal was impossible to argue with because there was nothing to argue against.
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He didn't say no. He just said,
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I would prefer not to.
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And I think there's a version of Stuck that works exactly like Bartleby's.
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It's the version where you keep saying that you want to do something,
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you want that identity, you want that life,
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but somehow you never do it.
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The book that you've been meaning to write for three years,
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the career change that you've been researching since 2022,
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the conversation you've been needing to have with your family for six months.
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You plan it, you think about it,
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you make outlines, but you don't actually do it.
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You are the boss in the story,
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the version of you that wants it,
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that keeps trying every approach,
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reasons, threats, new systems, discipline,
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but none of them actually work.
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You keep telling yourself that the problem is willpower or focus or finding the right system,
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but the consistency is informational.
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If you've been not doing the same thing for years across every system that you've tried,
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the not doing is telling you something.
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The version of you that decides is the boss.
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The version that acts is Bartleby.
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The boss keeps trying again, Bartleby keeps refusing.
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And Bartleby doesn't argue, he just doesn't move.
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Maybe you don't actually want the thing.
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Maybe you don't want it enough.
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Maybe you want the identity of the person that does the thing more than you want the work of getting it.
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you've wanted it once and you don't want any more and you just haven't realized that yet.
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That's what your Bartleby has been refusing.
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You just haven't asked him yet.
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See, the exit for this one is a motivation.
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The boss in the story tried motivation.
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It didn't work.
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The exit is honesty.
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Maybe you don't actually want this thing.
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Maybe this path isn't for you.
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Most of the time it's telling you something that you already know or half know.
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You just didn't want to know it yet.
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The fourth one is for the overthinkers.
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If you're the type of person that can describe your stuck in seven different ways
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and still can't move This one is for you
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You are ruminating the morning when you've been at your desk for two hours
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and the cursor just hasn't moved The conversation that you've been replaying
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so often in your head that you can't actually remember what was said anymore
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And the looping isn't neutral I think we treat sitting with a thought as healthy reflection
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But it isn't the longer you stay in the loop the worse you feel
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and the loop itself is what's doing the damage There is a part of the brain called the default mode network.
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It's a circuit that runs when you're not focused on a specific task.
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In a healthy brain, it cycles in and out,
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but in a stuck brain, it gets stuck on.
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It runs on its own seam,
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way after the original feeling has actually passed.
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It runs even after you've forgotten why you've started,
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which means the loop isn't deciding.
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It's just looping, and you can't think your way out of a loop because the thinking is the loop.
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This is the version of stuck,
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where everyone telling you to just decide is being useless.
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Deciding requires the loop to break.
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The loop will not break by being talked to.
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The loop breaks by being moved through A walk,
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a friend that you can call,
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cold water on your face,
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some breathing exercises Anything specific enough that the loop can't fall back into.
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The exit for this one isn't more thought,
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it's less So if you were to ask me which type of stuck that I'm stuck on,
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I would say I'm stuck at different ones at different times Sometimes I'm in two versions at once.
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Sometimes I'm just switching in a single afternoon.
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But this is the whole point of the video.
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Stuck isn't just one thing and it doesn't just have one solution.
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When I am in the fig tree version of stuck,
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I try to ask myself,
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what really are my options here?
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Do I actually have all these options or am I just imagining these options?
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Usually a couple of the figs aren't even real.
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I just thought that I was supposed to want these figs.
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When I'm in this comfort version of stuck,
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I think that's when I try to just do one small thing,
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truly just take it day by day.
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When I'm in the refusal version,
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I think it takes me a while to realize that the thing that I'm stuck on,
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the thing that I want,
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might not actually be what I want at all.
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But I think it's good to just be present that this option could always be there.
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And when I'm in this loop of stuck,
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I think doing physical activities really helps.
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I think the worst you can do is just be rotting and thinking and cooped up in your apartment.
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but we can try.
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ในวิดีโอนี้ผู้พูดเสนอภาพลักษณ์ของคนที่มีความทะเยอทะยานแต่กลับขาดความกระตือรือร้นในการลงมือทำ เขาสะท้อนถึงความรู้สึกของคนรุ่นใหม่ที่มีความฝันและเป้าหมายมากมาย ท่ามกลางความวุ่นวายในชีวิตประจำวันที่มีความคิดและความสนใจมากมายจนทำให้ไม่สามารถลงมือทำได้ ในโลกที่เต็มไปด้วยตัวเลือกซึ่งสร้างความสับสนและไม่แน่ใจว่าจะเลือกทางไหน ดีลน้อยที่เรายังไม่มีโอกาสจะทำตามความฝัน หากเราสามารถเรียนรู้จากประสบการณ์เหล่านี้ เราอาจค้นพบวิธีที่จะปรับปรุงการออกเสียงภาษาอังกฤษของเราผ่านวิธีการชาโดว์อิ้ง
5 ประโยคสำคัญสำหรับการสื่อสารประจำวัน
- “I want to do everything, so I do nothing.”
- “You keep promising yourself you'll come back to each one.”
- “I've spent most of this year wanting things.”
- “The truth is, since college, options have only multiplied.”
- “I am addicted to the feeling of being motivated.”
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