Shadowing-Übung: The Attachment Theory: How Childhood Affects Life - Englisch Sprechen Lernen mit Video

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The attachment theory argues that a strong emotional and physical bond to one primary caregiver in our first years of life, is critical to our development.
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If our bonding is strong and we are securely attached, then we feel safe to explore the world.
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We know there is always that safe base, to which we can return to anytime.
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If our bond is weak, we feel insecurely attached.
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We are afraid to leave or explore a rather scary-looking world.
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Because we are not sure if we can return.
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People who are securely attached are said to have greater trust, can connect to others and as a result are more successful in life.
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Insecurely attached people tend to mistrust others, lack social skills and have problems forming relationships.
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There is one type of secure attachment and there are 3 types of insecure attachments: Anxious/Ambivalent Anxious/Avoidant and Anxious/Disorganized.
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In responses to distress, the first 3 react organized, while the last acts disorganized.
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To understand the theory better, let's look at Mr and Ms Smith, who have 4 children.
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Luka, Ann, Joe and Amy.
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The Smiths are lovely parents, who cuddle, make frequent eye contact, speak warmly, and are always there for their kids.
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But one day Mr Smith falls very sick and dies.
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For Mrs Smith life now becomes very difficult.
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She spend all day working, while at the same time trying to care for her children.
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And impossible task.
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At 6 years of age, Luka’s brain is for the most part developed, his character strong and his world view shaped.
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The new situation does not affect him much - he knows there still is always mom - his safe-haven.
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He feels securely attached.
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Later he turns into a trusting and optimistic young man.
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His self image is positive.
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Ann, who is 3, has problems coping with the new lack of attention.
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To Ann, her mother now acts unpredictably.
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She is anxious about their relationship, and as a result becomes clingy.
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To get her mom’s attention, she has to raise her emotional state and scream.
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When her mom finally reacts with a predictable response, she herself acts ambivalent and doesn't show her true feelings.
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Later in life, others think Ann is unpredictable or moody.
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Her self image is less positive.
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Her attachment style Anxious Ambivalent.
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2-year old Joe, spends his days with his uncle, who loves him, but thinks that a good education means being strict.
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If little Joe shows too much emotions or is too loud, his Uncle gets angry and sometimes punitive.
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This scares Joe.
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He learns that to avoid fear, he has to avoid showing his feelings - also in other situations.
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As an adult he continues this strategy and has problems to enter relationships.
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His image of himself is rather negative.
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His attachment is: Anxious Avoidant Amy, who is just one year old, gets sent to a nursery.
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The staff there is poorly trained, overworked and often very stressed.
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Some are outright abusive.
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Amy therefore becomes anxious of the very people she seeks security from - a conflict which totally disorganizes her ideas about love and safety.
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As she is experiencing fear without resolution, she tries to avoid all social situations.
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As an adult she thinks of herself as unworthy of love.
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Her self image is very negative.
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He attachment is anxious disorganized Our attachment is formed in the very first years of our lives, a time when we are too young to communicate our anxiety and as a result can experience high levels of stress.
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Then our adrenal gland - an organ sitting on top of our kidneys - produces the stress-hormones adrenaline and cortisol.
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The heart rate increases, the blood pressure goes up and we become alert.
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If that happens frequently, it is called toxic stress.
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Toxic, because it impairs the development of a child's brain, and weakens the immune system.
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In embryos or at a very young age, toxic stress can even switch the expressions of genes, which can affect our health many decades later.
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By simulating a Strange Situation, we can assess an attachment style, already by the age of one.
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To do this, we let the child play with their mothers for a few minutes inside a room.
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Then the child is left alone.
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The key moment is the child's reaction when her mother returns.
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Securely attached children first usually hug their mother, then can calm down and eventually get back to playing.
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Insecurely attached children can be ambivalent and avoidant.
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Some can't stop crying or refuse to continue playing.
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The long term effects of our attachment in the early years, are well documented.
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Using the theory, researchers at Minnesota University were able to predict already at age 3, if a child would dropout of high school with 77% accuracy.
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In another study, undergraduates at Harvard were asked to assess how close they felt to their parents.
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35 years later they were ask about their health.
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91% of those who said they had a rather broken relationship with their mother, were also diagnosed with health issues, including coronary artery disease, hypertension, and alcoholism.
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For those that had reported a warm relationship, the figure of poor health diagnosis was just 45%.
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But there is another reason why the early years deserve special attention.
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They are the starting place for subsequent behaviors.
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A kid that feels securely attached at age 2, can make friends at kindergarten.
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Their worldview gets reinforced with every interaction and they develop optimism.
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As a result they make good relationships at school, then at colleague and later at work.
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Highly insecurely attached children can miss out on this opportunity.
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Psychologist John Bowlby, a pioneer in attachment theory, allegedly said, “What cannot be communicated to the mother, cannot be communicated to the self.” In other words: those who feel insecurely attached, might not quite understand themselves.
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To get to know who they are and what they feel, they might have to go way back in time.

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