シャドーイング練習: How To Never Get Angry Or Bothered By Anyone - 動画で英語スピーキングを学ぶ

練習モードを選ぶ

各モードは全画面の練習ルームで開きます。

309 文

文が短すぎたり長すぎる場合は、Editをタップして調整してください。

It's 4.12 in the afternoon.

A message comes in.

Nine words, maybe ten.

Nothing in it is an insult.

If you read it out loud to a stranger, they would shrug and hand your phone back.

But something in the tone was flat in a way that felt deliberate.

And your chest goes warm, your jaw sets, and somewhere in the back of your head, a sentence starts assembling itself,

sharper and cleaner than anything you would ever actually send.

And now you go looking for how to never get angry.

You search for how to stop letting people bother you, how to stay calm when someone provokes you, and every result gives you the same two pieces of advice.

Let it out or let it go.

Blow off steam.

Hit something.

Go for a run.

Or just be the bigger person and don't take it personally.

But here's the problem.

Letting out is not the move here, and researchers have known it for 50 years.

And just be the bigger person isn't advice at all.

It's a description of the finish line handed to someone standing at the start.

because being unbothered was never about feeling less.

The people you know who seem impossible to shake feel exactly what you feel.

Their chest goes tight, too.

What they stopped doing is something else entirely, something almost nobody names.

Welcome back to Psych Tunes.

Today we're going to break down the real psychology of anger, why certain people can still reach inside your day and turn the temperature up, what's actually happening in the seconds after they do,

and how to stop paying the price for it.

Let's start by being precise, because anger is doing too much work as a word.

In the research, anger is treated as two separate things stacked on top of each other.

There's the physical part, the heat, the tight jaw, the heart rate, the adrenaline, and there's the meaning part,

the story you're telling about what just happened and what it says about you.

That distinction sounds academic, until you realize it's the whole game.

In 2024, two researchers at Ohio State, Sophie Kiervik and Brad Bushman,

published something in Clinical Psychology Review that should have made a lot more noise than it did.

They pulled together 154 separate studies covering more than 10,000 people across different countries,

ages, and settings, and they asked one simple question.

Of everything humans do when they're angry, what actually works?

They sorted every technique into two piles.

Things that push your body up.

Hitting a bag, running, cycling, smashing plates in one of those rage rooms.

And things that bring your body down.

Slow breathing, muscle relaxation, meditation, or just walking away and doing nothing for ten minutes.

The result was completely one-sided.

The calming pile worked, reliably across almost every group they measured.

And the other pile, the one every movie, every gym, and every well-meaning friend recommends, did not.

In some cases, it made people angrier than doing absolutely nothing.

Bushman had actually shown a version of this back in 2002.

He got people insulted by a stranger, then had one group hit a punching bag while thinking about the person who insulted them.

Classic advice.

Get it out of your system.

Those people ended up more hostile afterward than the people who just sat there.

One of them punched a hole in the laboratory wall.

Sitting still and doing nothing outperformed venting.

Here's the picture I want you to hold, because it explains almost everything that follows.

Someone says a sentence to you.

That's an ember.

One small piece of heat, flicked in your direction, out of their own bad afternoon.

An ember on its own does almost nothing.

It lands.

It glows for a moment, and if it is left completely alone, it goes out.

That's not optimism.

That's just physics.

It does not have enough in it to become a fire.

So how does a nine-word message become seven hours?

Because you pick up the bellows.

Every time you replay the sentence, every time you rehearse the comeback, every time you tell the story to a friend with the tone included, every time you go to the gym specifically to burn it off while thinking about their face,

you are pumping air onto something that was going out on its own.

And this is the part that stings.

The ember was theirs.

The fire is yours.

You built it.

Not because you're weak or dramatic, but because every instinct you have about anger is pointing you toward the bellows and telling you it's a fire extinguisher.

The word vent comes from a model of the mind that treats you like a pressure cooker.

Pressure builds, pressure must escape, or you explode.

It's an old idea.

It came down through Aristotle, it got a scientific costume from Freud, and it ended up in school programs,

therapy rooms, and eventually in businesses that charge you money to break glass in a warehouse.

Albert Bandura called for the field to abandon it in 1973.

The field largely did.

The pressure cooker just never left the culture.

You are not broken.

You inherited a bad instruction manual.

So if the heat isn't the problem, why can some people still get so far inside your head?

Let's look at four reasons.

Reason one, you're still trying to win an argument that already ended.

The conversation finished at 412.

You're still in it at 11.

You know the loop.

You replay the exchange.

You try a better version of your line.

You imagine their face when you say it.

You imagine what they'd say back, so you build a second line for that.

You are running a courtroom in your skull where you are the lawyer, the judge, and the only person present.

And it feels productive.

That's what makes it dangerous.

Every rehearsal feels like you're getting closer to resolution.

Here's what the research says about that.

In 2015, Philippa Verdoyne and Saskia Lavraizen looked at how long emotions actually last.

27 different ones.

And what predicted whether an emotion stayed for 10 minutes or 3 days wasn't how hard it hit you.

100

It was two things.

101

How important you rated the event and how much you ruminated about it.

102

How long you stay angry is not set by what they did.

103

It's set by how much you handle it afterward.

104

That's the bellows.

105

Each replay is one more pump, and the cost is that you hand over an entire evening, an entire commute, sometimes an entire weekend, to a moment that lasted four seconds,

106

and to a person who is currently asleep.

107

Reason two, you're checking whether they were right.

108

This is the quiet one, and it's the one that decides which comments actually land.

109

Think about it honestly.

110

Somebody tells you that you're terrible at basketball.

111

If you've never played basketball, nothing happens.

112

You don't even file it.

113

But somebody makes one small comment about how long your project is taking, and it goes in like a splinter.

114

Why?

115

Because the second one triggered an audit.

116

Some part of you immediately went and checked the books.

117

Is that true?

118

Am I slow?

119

Have other people noticed?

120

The moment you run that check, you've done something specific.

121

You've told your own nervous system that this event is important.

122

And importance, according to that same research, is one of the two things that keeps an emotion alive.

123

So the insult didn't stick because it was accurate.

124

It stuck because you stopped to verify it.

125

You gave someone with incomplete information about your life the position of examiner, and then you sat the exam.

126

The cost isn't just the bad evening, it's that your sense of yourself becomes something other people can edit.

127

Anyone with a bad mood and a spare sentence gets a vote.

128

Reason 3.

129

Some part of you doesn't want it to end.

130

I want to be careful here because this one is uncomfortable, and I'm only going to say it once.

131

Being wronged is a very restful place to stand.

132

Think about what it gives you.

133

You are right, they are wrong.

134

The line is clean, and crucially, you don't have to do anything.

135

You don't have to have the difficult conversation.

136

You don't have to look at your own part in it.

137

You don't have to change anything on Monday.

138

Your only job is to be correct, and you already are.

139

Compare that to the alternative.

140

Letting it go means going back to the actual work.

141

The project that isn't finished.

142

The thing you said you'd start.

143

The conversation you've been avoiding for six weeks that has nothing to do with this person at all.

144

So when you notice yourself reaching for the story again at 11 at night, reaching for the version where you were treated unfairly, it's worth asking a hard question.

145

Is this anger or is this shelter?

146

Because righteousness is one of the very few emotional states that feels like motion while you're standing perfectly still.

147

And the cost of that is measured in years, not evenings.

148

Reason four, you discharge instead of settling.

149

This is where all the popular advice does its damage.

150

Something happens at work, you come home and you vent to your partner for 40 minutes, tone included, gestures included, the impression of their voice included.

151

Or you go hard at the gym specifically to burn it off.

152

Or you drive too fast.

153

Or you find the one friend who will agree with you completely and you tell it again.

154

You do feel something afterward.

155

Lighter maybe.

156

Heard.

157

But watch what you actually did.

158

You just took the moment and rehearsed it out loud with your body activated while holding their face in your mind.

159

In terms of what your nervous system learned, you didn't process the event.

160

You practiced it.

161

You strengthened the exact pathway you were trying to weaken.

162

Bushman's finding was blunt about this.

163

People who vented and reported feeling better afterward were more aggressive, not less.

164

The relief is real.

165

The relief is also the problem.

166

It's what makes you come back and do it again next time.

167

The cost is that you can spend 15 years doing something that feels like emotional maintenance and is actually emotional rehearsal, and never once suspect it because it felt good every single time.

168

So here's where all four of these leave you.

169

You defend your dignity by holding onto the insult.

170

You protect your self-respect by refusing to let it slide.

171

That's the logic, and it's a decent logic.

172

But look at the outcome.

173

The person who said the thing spent four seconds on it.

174

You spent seven hours.

175

They forgot it by 4.15.

176

You'll remember it in a year.

177

You went to war to prove you weren't affected by them, and the proof you produced was an entire evening of your life, signed over in their name.

178

Whoever can make you angry the fastest is the person with the most control over your calendar.

179

That's the trade, and nobody agrees to it out loud.

180

So how do you actually stop?

181

Now before the practical part, I need to take one thing off the table, because it's the reason most people fail at this.

182

You cannot decide not to feel it.

183

Anger is, by the researcher's own description, the negative emotion people have the hardest time regulating.

184

It arrives before you do.

185

By the time the thought, I shouldn't be angry, appears in your mind, the adrenaline is already out, your heart rate is already up, and your body has already committed.

186

Trying to use willpower at that point is like trying to talk a car out of skidding.

187

Telling yourself to be unbothered is the same as telling yourself to be taller.

188

So we're not going to work on the feeling.

189

We're going to work on the two things you actually control.

190

Your body in the first minutes, and your story in the hours after.

191

Three principles.

192

Principle 1.

193

The body comes first.

194

Always.

195

The most common mistake is trying to think your way out while your body is still hot.

196

You try to be reasonable, you try to see their side, you try to be the bigger person.

197

And it doesn't take, because reasoning is happening on top of a system that is currently preparing for a fight.

198

The story you build in that state will always be a hostile one.

199

It has to be.

200

Your body is already voting.

201

So invert the order.

202

Body first, meaning second.

203

Practically, leave the room.

204

Not to sulk.

205

To lower your heart rate.

206

you're breathing down deliberately with the out-breath longer than the in-breath for two full minutes.

207

Sit down.

208

Put your feet flat. Do nothing.

209

That last one is important.

210

Doing genuinely nothing outperformed almost everything in the studies.

211

Not scrolling, which keeps you activated.

212

Not running, which raises arousal even higher.

213

Nothing.

214

And a small note that surprises people, don't go to the gym while you're still holding the story.

215

Exercise is excellent for you.

216

It is not a good way to metabolize a specific grievance

217

because you'll spend the whole session rehearsing it with your heart at 160.

218

Come back to the meaning later.

219

It will be a different meaning.

220

Principle two, change the pronoun.

221

This one takes four seconds and it is the strangest useful thing in psychology.

222

Ethan Cross and his colleagues at Michigan tested what happens

223

when people reflect on something upsetting using their own name in the word you instead of I.

224

Not out loud, just internally.

225

So instead of, I can't believe he said that to me.

226

Why does he always do this?

227

You run.

228

Okay, Sarah is angry right now.

229

What actually happened to Sarah?

230

It sounds like a trick, and in a sense it is.

231

But the effect showed up across their experiments, less emotional reactivity, less rumination afterward, and a more accurate read of how threatening the situation really was.

232

A related study with Bushman found that people who took this stepped-back perspective during an actual provocation had fewer aggressive thoughts,

233

less anger, and behaved less aggressively.

234

Here's why it works.

235

When you say I, the person feeling the emotion and the person analyzing it are standing in the same spot.

236

There's no room.

237

When you use your own name, the problem is still yours, but the wording puts you one step outside it, roughly where you stand when a friend tells you about their bad day.

238

And you can see the whole thing clearly in about 11 seconds.

239

You already have that ability.

240

You just have never once pointed it at yourself.

241

Principle 3.

242

Rate the importance honestly.

243

Remember what actually sets the length of an emotion.

244

Importance and rumination.

245

You can't lie to yourself about importance.

246

Telling yourself, this doesn't matter while your chest is tight doesn't work.

247

Some part of you knows you're bluffing and the emotion stays.

248

But you can rate it accurately, which is different.

249

Ask one question and answer it seriously.

250

Is this person's opinion load-bearing in my life?

251

Not, are they important?

252

Not, do I like them?

253

Load-bearing.

254

If they were wrong about me permanently, would anything in my actual life fall down?

255

For most of the people who ruin your evenings, the honest answer is no. A colleague you'll leave behind in two jobs.

256

A stranger in traffic.

257

A relative who has been saying the same thing since you were 19.

258

Their assessment is not holding up any wall in your house.

259

And then, occasionally, the answer is yes.

260

Sometimes it's your partner, your closest friend, your child.

261

And when the answer is yes, the correct response isn't calm, it's a conversation.

262

Real anger at a load-bearing person is information.

263

It means something needs to be said, on purpose, once, when you're cool.

264

That's the actual sorting.

265

Not everything gets swallowed.

266

Most things get released, and a few things get said properly.

267

What this turns into.

268

Here's what I don't want you to expect.

269

You will not become someone who feels nothing.

270

That person doesn't exist, and if he did, you wouldn't want to be him.

271

The same wiring that makes a comment land is the wiring that lets you care about people at all.

272

You can't have one without the other.

273

What changes is smaller and much better than that.

274

The ember still lands.

275

Someone still says the thing and your chest still goes warm at 412, and you still notice the tone.

276

That never stops.

277

You just stop reaching for the bellows.

278

You feel the heat, you let it be four seconds long instead of seven hours, and you go back to what you were doing.

279

The ember goes out on its own the way it was always going to.

280

And after a few months of this, you notice something strange.

281

People describe you as calm.

282

They think you're not affected.

283

They're wrong.

284

You're affected exactly as much as before.

285

You've just stopped funding it.

286

That's the whole thing.

287

Unbotherable people aren't people nothing reaches.

288

They're people who stopped building the fire.

289

Almost 2000 years ago, a former slave named Epictetus wrote down a line

290

that every one of those 154 studies eventually circled back to.

291

People are not disturbed by things, he said, but by the views they take of them.

292

He didn't have brain scans.

293

He didn't need them.

294

He'd already noticed that between what happens to you and how much it costs you, there is a gap.

295

And that gap is the only real estate you've ever owned.

296

So of the four reasons we went through, replaying the argument, checking whether they were right, using the anger as shelter, or venting it out, which one is yours?

297

Be honest in the comments because most of us live in one of them almost exclusively, and naming it is genuinely most of the work.

298

And if you recognize yourself today, know this.

299

There's nothing wrong with you.

300

You were handed a broken instruction manual about anger, along with everybody else, and you followed it faithfully.

301

That's not a character flaw.

302

That's just what happens when the wrong advice is the loudest.

303

If this video gave you even one useful thing, hit like and share it with someone you know who's been carrying a conversation around for weeks.

304

They might not have the words for what's happening to them yet.

305

Your 10 seconds could give them their evenings back.

306

You were watching Psych Tunes.

307

subscribe, and turn on notifications so we can keep taking apart the hidden mechanics of the mind together.

308

Thank you for staying with me to the end.

309

See you next time!

アプリをダウンロード

流暢に話すために必要なすべて

AI発音採点文ごとに採点

IPA練習すべての音をマスター

単語学習自分の単語帳を作る

単語ゲーム遊びながら覚える

QRをスキャン

Download on theApp Store Get it onGoogle Play

同じチャンネル

FOR YOU

このレッスンの語彙とスピーキングのポイント

このB2レベルのスピーキングレッスンは、動画「How To Never Get Angry Or Bothered By Anyone」を教材にしています。この動画には、シャドーイング用の文が309文、単語が3116語あります。音声の長さは16:48です。話す速さは速く、1分あたり約186語です。音のつながりや弱く発音される音が多くなります。単語の87%は英語の頻出3,000語に含まれるため、語彙は分かりやすいです。

この動画の重要語彙

動画の中で特に難しい単語15語を、発音と意味つきで紹介します。

単語	発音	意味
emotion 名詞	/ɪˈməʊ.ʃən/	感情, 心緒
ember 名詞	/ˈɛm.bə/	種火, 余燼
insult 名詞	/ɪnˈsʌlt/	侮辱
bellows 名詞	/ˈbɛl.oʊz/	鞴
replay 名詞	/ˈɹiːpleɪ/	リプレイ
pile 名詞	/paɪl/	積み重ね, 山
cooker 名詞	/ˈkʊkɚ/	コンロ, 焜炉
adrenaline 名詞	/əˈdɹɛnəlɪn/	アドレナリン, エピネフリン
ventilation 名詞	/ˌvɛntɪˈleɪʃ(ə)n/	通風, 換気
rehearsal 名詞	/ɹɪˈhɝsl̩/	リハーサル, リハ
researcher 名詞	/ˈɹiˌsɝ.t͡ʃɚ/	研究員, 研究者
colleague 名詞	/ˈkɒliːɡ/	同僚, 同業者
hostile 形容詞	/ˈhɑstəl/	敵の, 敵対的な
instruction 名詞	/ɪnˈstɹʌkʃən/	指示
arousal 名詞	/əˈɹaʊzəl/	覚醒, 喚起

動画に出てくる句動詞

単語	発音	意味
come back 動詞		戻る, 帰る
come down 動詞		降りる
fall down 動詞	/fɔl ˈdaʊn/	落ちる
go out 動詞		出る
hand over 動詞		引き渡す, 手渡す
pick up 動詞		拾う, 拾い上げる
show up 動詞		現れる
sit down 動詞		座る, 腰掛ける

繰り返し練習したい文

動画に出てくる短く完結した文です。日常会話でそのまま使えます。

Let's look at four reasons.
Every rehearsal feels like you're getting closer to resolution.
It's set by how much you handle it afterward.
Is this person's opinion load-bearing in my life?
Not, do I like them?

この動画の文法

話し手がよく使っている文型を、動画の実際の表現とともに紹介します。

文型	動画での表現
現在完了進行形 have/has been + -ing — 以前に始まり今も続いている動作	you've been avoiding · has been saying · who's been carrying
条件文 if + 節, will/would + 動詞 — 条件とその結果	if he did, you wouldn't want
受動態 be + 過去分詞 — 誰がするかより、何が起きるかに焦点を当てる	being unbothered · is treated · is left
関係詞節 who / which + 節 — 人や物について情報を加える	person who insulted · people who just · person who is

注意したい発音

話し手はyou're, don't, you'veなど、短縮形や弱形を63回使っています。聞こえたとおりの短い形で発音しましょう。

「th」の音: faithfully /ˈfeɪθfəli/, pathway /ˈpæθˌweɪ/, threaten /ˈθɹɛt.n̩/, theirs /ðɛɚz/, strengthen /ˈstɹɛŋ(k)θən/
「sh」と「zh」の音: emotion /ɪˈməʊ.ʃən/, rumination /ˌɹuːmɪˈneɪʃən/, ventilation /ˌvɛntɪˈleɪʃ(ə)n/, instruction /ɪnˈstɹʌkʃən/, crucially /ˈkɹuːʃəli/
長い単語（アクセントの位置に注意）: rumination /ˌɹuːmɪˈneɪʃən/, adrenaline /əˈdɹɛnəlɪn/, ventilation /ˌvɛntɪˈleɪʃ(ə)n/, genuinely /ˈd͡ʒɛn.ju.ɪn.li/, extinguisher /ɪkˈstɪŋɡwɪʃə(ɹ)/

日本語話者が苦手な音：

/r/ と /l/ の区別 — /l/ は舌先を歯茎につけ、/r/ はどこにもつけない: replay /ˈɹiːpleɪ/, adrenaline /əˈdɹɛnəlɪn/, rehearsal /ɹɪˈhɝsl̩/, arousal /əˈɹaʊzəl/, crucially /ˈkɹuːʃəli/
/v/ — /b/ にならないように、上の歯を下唇に当てる: ventilation /ˌvɛntɪˈleɪʃ(ə)n/, activate /ˈæktɪˌveɪt/, vent /vɛnt/, grievance /ˈɡɹiː.vəns/, invert /ɪnˈvɜɹt/
/f/ — 「フ」ではなく、上の歯と下唇で出す: outperform /ˌaʊt.pɚˈfɔɹm/, faithfully /ˈfeɪθfəli/, restful /ˈɹɛs(t)fʊl/, bluff /blʌf/, flaw /flɔ/

この動画での練習方法

まず声を出さずに動画を最後まで聞き、知らない単語をメモします。
まず0.75倍速で一文ずつシャドーイングし、慣れてきたら通常の速度に戻します。
自分の声を録音して元の音声と比べます。emotion, ember, insultなどの単語に特に注意しましょう。

シャドーイングとは？英語上達に効果的な理由

シャドーイング（Shadowing）は、もともとプロの通訳者養成プログラムで開発された言語学習法で、多言語習得者として知られるDr. Alexander Arguelles によって広く普及されました。方法はシンプルですが非常に効果的：ネイティブスピーカーの英語を聞きながら、1〜2秒の遅延で声に出してすぐに繰り返す——まるで「影（shadow）」のように話者を追いかけます。文法ドリルや受動的なリスニングと異なり、シャドーイングは脳と口の筋肉が同時にリアルタイムで英語を処理・再現することを強制します。研究により、発音精度、抑揚、リズム、連音、リスニング力、そして会話の流暢さが大幅に向上することが確認されています。IELTSスピーキング対策や自然な英語コミュニケーションを目指す方に特におすすめです。

シャドーイングのやり方: ステップ別の完全ガイドを読む →

シャドーイング練習: How To Never Get Angry Or Bothered By Anyone - 動画で英語スピーキングを学ぶ

練習モードを選ぶ

アプリをダウンロード

同じチャンネル

Psychology of Polymaths: Why Having Multiple Interests Is an Unfair Advantage

Psychology of Intelligence: Learn Anything So Fast It's Almost Unfair

Psychology of Discipline (And How to Trick Your Brain Into Craving It)

Psychology of Charisma: How To Actually Make People Like You

おすすめ動画

Always Angry? Try This Technique Before The Next Blow Up

How To Never Get Angry Or Bothered | Slow English Podcast #learnenglishpodcast

Why Nothing Changes (And How To Break Free)

How to Stop Taking Things Personally

3 Brain Tricks That Make You Happier in 15 Seconds

Stop Saying "I'm Fine" 😮 Say THIS Instead to Sound Like a Native | Talk About Feelings in English

It Is NOT Laziness, It Is Something DARKER

Anger Management- Charlie Dates a Teacher | FULL EPISODE | Sn 2 | Ep 7 | Lionsgate TV

Master English SPEAKING with SHADOWING Practice Listen & Learn English Repeat-After-Me

How You Feel and What You Do Don't Need to Correlate

Why Your Country Is Making You Sick (And How to Heal)

Stop Rambling: The 3-2-1 Speaking Trick That Makes You Sound Like A CEO