Shadowing Practice: Epictetus' Secret to Breaking Bad Habits - Learn English Speaking with Video
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We live in an age of instant gratification.
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Easy pleasures are all around us, and they constantly beg for our attention.
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We can indulge in social media, online shopping, streaming, gambling, and mature content without even leaving the couch.
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Various substances and junk food are widely available, at least in the West.
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And so, many of us develop bad habits.
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Some are rather innocent others can seriously undermine our well -being.
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And many struggle to get rid of these bad habits, and may try for years only to relapse over and over again.
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The Stoics understood this problem well.
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They saw excessive desire as a passion, an irrational disturbance that, if we follow it, could get us into trouble.
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Epictetus spoke extensively about how to deal with passions including the temptations that so often lead us astray.
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In particular, he offered a piece of advice that many of us overlook when trying to break a bad habit.
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This video explores a simple way to break bad habits, based on the wisdom of Epictetus.
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His advice has helped me personally, especially in overcoming past habitual binge drinking and other unhealthy pleasures.
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The passion the Stoics called epithumia is a desire or longing for some anticipated pleasure.
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Something we hope to experience in the future.
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It's the urge that sends us to the fridge for an unhealthy snack, or to the browser for a visit to the hub.
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The more we give in to this urge, the stronger it tends to return later, as the habit becomes increasingly ingrained,
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which is a mechanism that is well supported by modern psychology.
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Hence, we build habits by repetition, which also applies to bad habits.
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So, the key to breaking a habit is not to give in to it, refraining over and over again,
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which weakens it every time we succeed.
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The problem, however, is that it's easier said than done.
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When we experience a strong desire, resisting it can be difficult.
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It clouds our judgment and disturbs our rational thinking.
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We forget about tomorrow and the long -term consequences of our actions because we want the promised pleasure so badly.
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The regret, the guilt, and how we'll feel afterward are pushed aside.
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All we seem to have eyes for is that promised pleasure, what the Stoics called hedone.
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But once we have given in to desire and experienced hedone, which is often much shorter and less satisfying than we imagined,
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we remember why we have told ourselves so many times not to do it.
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We're now dealing with the consequences, and we're taking an oath to abstain.
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But later, Here, we find ourselves repeating the action, as the temptation seems too strong to resist.
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It's frustrating, it's disheartening, and we may feel it's a hopeless case.
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But luckily, Epictetus has some advice for us.
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If you are struck by the appearance of any promised pleasure, guard yourself against against being hurried away by it,
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but let the affair wait your leisure and procure yourself some delay," said Epictetus.
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Here we see a good example of what we might call stoic mindfulness.
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Similar to Buddhist mindfulness, it requires us to pay close attention to what is happening within us.
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In this case, it's the appearance of a promised pleasure and our reaction to it.
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Instead of acting upon it or suppressing it, Epictetus asks us to pause for a moment.
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Rather than letting ourselves be carried away by the desire for that pleasure, we take a step back and watch it.
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This can be difficult, of course, especially when the desire is strong.
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When the monster is still small and weak, it's much easier to defeat it, so to speak.
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Once a desire gathers momentum, resisting it becomes much harder.
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In my experience, it's important to notice the desire as soon as it arises, and it often creeps in very subtly.
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And that's why mindfulness is so valuable.
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It helps us become aware of these impulses before they take control.
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So that's the first step.
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Now Epictetus wants us to look into the future.
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More specifically, he wants us to imagine two possible outcomes, one based on pain and regret, the other.. on joy and self -respect.
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Let's begin with the first.
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Then bring to your mind both points of time, that in which you will enjoy the pleasure and that in
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which you will repent and reproach yourself after you have enjoyed it.
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End quote.
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Now, this part of the advice is pretty straightforward, and I'm sure you have tried it before.
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We remind ourselves that even though we'll experience the pleasure, we'll also have to face the consequences afterward.
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In other words, we look beyond the goody and consider the pain that may follow if we take it.
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For many, that's enough.
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When I think of the horrible hangovers I get after binge drinking, the depressive moods that could linger for days,
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it's usually enough now to keep me from the booze when I'm tempted.
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But it wasn't always that way, and it still isn't sometimes, to be honest.
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In many cases, this approach just isn't enough.
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Desire has a way of distorting our judgement.
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We begin to bargain.
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We tell ourselves that the consequences won't be so bad and that pleasure is totally worth the price.
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And perhaps sometimes it is.
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But often, we're simply being misled by the power of passion.
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Now, as I mentioned before, Epictetus also wants us to visualize a positive outcome, saying, and set before you,
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in opposition to these, how you will be glad and applaud yourself if you abstain.
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Let's see what he's getting at with this.
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Imagine we're still in waiting mode.
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We're still on pause, observing the habit we're trying to break, feeling our desire for a specific pleasure.
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Let's suppose fear didn't work.
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What about positive reinforcement?
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What if we traded an immediate, short -lived pleasure for a more durable and constructive one?
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In today's world, pleasure usually means adding something.
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An experience, a purchase, a meal, a drink, another episode, another scroll through TikTok.
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We celebrate consumption, but we rarely consider the pleasure of not consuming, the pleasure of missing out.
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One of these pleasures, Epictetus makes clear, is the satisfaction that comes from not giving in.
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Whether the pleasure is a night of binge drinking, a session of overeating junk food, or spending the night on the hub,
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or perhaps the hamster, we can give ourselves a round of applause for having resisted it.
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Now, if that sounds a bit lame or unsatisfactory, here's what Epictetus said next.
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And even though it should appear to you a seasonable gratification,
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take heed that its enticing and agreeable and attractive force may not subdue you.
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But set an opposition to this, how much better it is to be conscious of having gained so great a victory.
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End quote.
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By not giving in, we gained a victory.
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We overcame, and we allow ourselves to feel great about it.
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This may seem like a small thing, but it's a gift that keeps on giving.
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We can return to this joy at any time of day.
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We can keep reminding ourselves of how we have overcome temptation and feel satisfied every time.
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Moreover, we have become stronger, while the habit has become weaker.
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So, it's a victory with serious consequences.
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And the more often we attain this pleasure, the more powerful we become.
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Over time, we build a greater sense of accomplishment, self -respect, and confidence.
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We begin to feel better about ourselves.
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We look in the mirror and like what we see.
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I mean, if that isn't a pleasure worth pursuing, what is?
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The challenge, however, is seeing through the illusion of the promised pleasure and trusting the process.
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We must remind ourselves that the satisfaction of victory indeed arrives after the desire has passed,
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and that it's far more enjoyable and rewarding than what we're missing out on.
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Vocabulary and speaking notes for this lesson
This speaking lesson is built on the video “Epictetus' Secret to Breaking Bad Habits”. The speaker keeps coming back to these words: pleasure, desire, habit, ourselves, Epictetus. This video has 24 sentences and 1337 words to shadow. The speech runs for 9:50. The speaker talks at a steady 136 words per minute, a comfortable pace for shadowing. 82% of the words are among the 3,000 most common in English; the rest is worth studying before you start.
Key vocabulary in this video
15 words from the video worth learning, with pronunciation and meaning:
| Word | Pronunciation | Meaning |
|---|---|---|
| habit noun | /ˈhæb.ɪt/ | An action performed on a regular basis. |
| consequence noun | /ˈkɑn.sɪ.kwəns/ | An effect; something that follows a cause as a result. |
| passion noun | /ˈpæʃən/ | A true desire sustained or prolonged. |
| resist verb | /ɹɪˈzɪst/ | To attempt to counter the actions or effects of. |
| remind verb | /ɹəˈmaɪnd/ | To cause one to experience a memory (of someone or something); to bring to the notice or consideration (of a person). |
| overcome verb | /ˌəʊ.vəˈkʌm/ | To surmount (a physical or abstract obstacle); to prevail over, to get the better of. |
| temptation noun | /ˌtɛmpˈteɪʃən/ | The act of tempting. |
| binge noun | /bɪnd͡ʒ/ | A short period of excessive consumption, especially of food, alcohol, narcotics, etc. |
| afterwards adverb | /ˈæf.tɚ.wɚdz/ | At a later or succeeding time; after that; |
| regret verb | /ɹɪˈɡɹɛt/ | To feel sorry about (a thing that has or has not happened), afterthink: to wish that a thing had not happened, that something else had happened instead. |
| outcome noun | /ˈaʊtkʌm/ | That which is produced or occurs as a result of an event or process. |
| judgment noun | /ˈd͡ʒʌd͡ʒ.mənt/ | The act of judging. |
| satisfaction noun | /sætɪsˈfækʃən/ | A fulfilment of a need or desire. |
| urge verb | /ɜːd͡ʒ/ | To press; to push; to drive; to impel; to force onward. |
| junk noun | /d͡ʒʌŋk/ | Miscellaneous items of little value, especially discarded or unwanted items. |
Phrasal verbs you will hear
| Word | Pronunciation | Meaning |
|---|---|---|
| carried away adjective | Made excessively emotional or excited, so that one goes too far. | |
| miss out verb | To miss an experience or lose an opportunity, etc. that should not be missed. | |
| push aside verb | To ignore, reject or subdue (something). | |
| see through verb | To perceive visually through something transparent. | |
| step back verb | /stɛp ˈbæk/ | To stop what one is doing and evaluate the current situation. |
Sentences worth repeating
Short, complete lines from the video that you can reuse in everyday conversation:
- We’re now dealing with the consequences.
- Imagine we’re still in waiting mode.
- I mean… if that isn’t a pleasure worth pursuing, what is?
Grammar in this video
The structures the speaker uses most, with the exact words from the video:
| Structure | In the video |
|---|---|
| Present perfect have/has + past participle — a past action that still matters now | has helped · have given · have told |
| Passive voice be + past participle — the focus is on what happens, not who does it | are pushed · are struck · be carried |
Pronunciation to watch
The speaker uses 22 contractions and reduced forms, such as we're, isn't, we'll. Say them the short way, as you hear them.
- The “th” sounds: unhealthy /ʌnˈhɛl.θi/, gather /ˈɡæðɚ/, oath /ˈoʊθ/
- The “sh” and “zh” sounds: passion /ˈpæʃən/, temptation /ˌtɛmpˈteɪʃən/, satisfaction /sætɪsˈfækʃən/, consumption /kənˈsʌmp.ʃən/, conscious /ˈkɑn.ʃəs/
- Long words — get the stress right: satisfaction /sætɪsˈfækʃən/, psychology /saɪˈkɑ.lə.d͡ʒi/, mechanism /ˈmɛk.ə.nɪ.zəm/, momentum /ˌmə(ʊ)ˈmɛntəm/, extensively /ɪkˈstɛn.sɪv.li/
How to practise with this video
- Listen to the whole video once without speaking and note the words you do not know.
- Shadow it sentence by sentence at normal speed, repeating each one until your rhythm matches the speaker.
- Record yourself and compare with the original, paying attention to words like habit, consequence, passion.
What is the Shadowing Technique?
Shadowing is a science-backed language learning technique originally developed for professional interpreter training and popularized by polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. The method is simple but powerful: you listen to native English audio and immediately repeat it out loud — like a shadow following the speaker with just a 1–2 second delay. Unlike passive listening or grammar drills, shadowing forces your brain and mouth muscles to simultaneously process and reproduce real speech patterns. Research shows it significantly improves pronunciation accuracy, intonation, rhythm, connected speech, listening comprehension, and speaking fluency — making it one of the most effective methods for IELTS Speaking preparation and real-world English communication.