Shadowing Practice: Girl, Stop Apologizing by Rachel Hollis: 18 Minute Summary - Learn English Speaking with Video
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Rachel Hollis, Girl, Stop Apologizing, a shame -free plan for embracing and achieving your goals.
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and girl stop apologizing best -selling author rachel hollis illuminates the internal
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and external obstacles women face in pursuing their dreams
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this book summary explores the challenges women encounter such as widespread societal expectations seeking approval from others
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and juggling multiple roles in their day -to -day lives with candid insight
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and practical advice Hollis helps readers overcome the common excuses
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that hold them back and encourages them to embrace their unique goals fearlessly.
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Unleashing Women's True Potential Envision a world where women relentlessly chase their deepest desires, untroubled by external judgments or self -doubt.
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If merely 5 % of women did so, our world would transform for the better.
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Unfortunately, countless women currently abandon their aspirations, and several factors contribute to this predicament.
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Craving attention and valuing others' opinions is a fundamental human trait.
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This behavior originates in childhood and persists into adulthood, manifesting in various ways, such as hypochondria or workaholism.
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Additionally, societal expectations often impose girls to prioritize their roles as wives and mothers, which inhibits their personal goal achievement.
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Contrarily, boys are encouraged to pursue their dreams.
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To overcome these deeply ingrained barriers and be true to oneself, focusing on individual aspirations rather than others' expectations is vital.
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Acknowledge that women's dreams can differ significantly and resist the urge to make excuses for not pursuing them.
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Moving forward, the common barriers holding women back will be dismantled, replaced with empowering mindsets and skills that help fearless pursuit of goals.
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Unleash your authentic self.
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Embrace your individuality and pursue the life that makes you feel fulfilled, without being influenced by societal expectations and norms.
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Regardless of the path you take, it's never too late to develop new skills and attain your goals.
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For years, the author juggled a dual existence, a loving wife and mother, who also happened to be a successful entrepreneur and blogger.
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Unbeknownst to many, she worked grueling 60 -hour weeks managing a team and running her own business.
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The decision to maintain such a demanding career after having her first child was met with skepticism,
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as it went against the popular belief that to be a good mother, a woman should scale back her professional life.
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Societal pressure to conform is ever -present, beginning during adolescence when most people want nothing more than to fit in.
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While some embrace their individuality during their teenage years, others seek solace in being indistinguishable from their peers.
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As time goes on, this deeply ingrained need for conformity leads to overlooked aspirations and the nagging question,
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does conforming to expectations truly lead to happiness and fulfillment?
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When considering the pursuit of personal dreams and goals,
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people often feel guilty, believing their desires are in contradiction with the expectations for others in their position.
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The author emphasizes that it's important not to let these expectations dictate your self -worth or shape your life choices.
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Instead, focus on what genuinely makes you content.
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Another common deterrent to following your dreams is the perception of not being a goal -oriented person.
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However, the author urges that planning and organization are learnable skills that can be developed throughout life.
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So, refuse to give up on your goals before even trying, you possess the power to learn, improve, and ultimately achieve your aspirations.
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Use this understanding to propel yourself towards the life you genuinely desire, free from external pressures and constraints.
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Banish excuses, make time.
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Silencing the excuse, I don't have time, requires consciously making time for activities that help achieve goals.
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Accept ownership of your life, create a schedule to bridge the gap between aspirations and reality,
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and commit to personal growth by navigating insecurities deriving from past experiences.
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Acknowledging that there is no free time is pivotal for realizing dreams and aspirations.
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Instead of waiting for leisure hours to magically appear, one must consciously allocate time for activities that contribute to achieving goals,
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even if it means making hard choices or sacrifices.
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The primary step in carving out time is taking complete ownership of one's life.
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Regardless of one's occupation, whether a CEO or a stay -at -home parent, it's crucial to embrace responsibility and control over personal schedules,
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including leisure activities such as watching TV.
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Many busy professionals and parents manage to make time for marathon training, so finding time to pursue your passion should be possible as well.
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To allocate time for personal goals, create an hourly schedule outlining a week's complete activities.
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Next, identify at least 5 hours, non -consecutive, if necessary, that can be devoted to actively work towards achieving goals.
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Choose times when peak performance is most likely, either in the mornings or at night for early birds and night owls, respectively.
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Implement this new schedule for the upcoming week and contemplate any adjustments that might improve the plan for subsequent weeks.
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A pervasive hindrance to success is the feeling that one lacks the necessary skills or abilities, typically stemming from insecurities rooted in past experiences.
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This could result from bullies, discouraging teachers, or other negative occurrences.
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However, such past setbacks should not dictate future successes.
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Everyone experiences personal growth differently, finding success in varied learning environments.
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Some excel in classrooms, while others thrive through online tutorials.
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The crucial aspect is maintaining a willingness to learn, leading to discovering which methods work best individually.
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By overcoming insecurities and believing in the ability to achieve personal growth, taking control of one's schedule becomes truly empowering.
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Ditching guilt and embracing success
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Self -improvement goals should never be associated with guilt or fear of judgment.
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People often give up on their aspirations due to mommy guilt or worrying about the opinions of others.
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It's essential to prioritize personal ambitions and have the courage to risk failures, as they pave the way for ultimate success.
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Taking back control of your life means not letting others dictate your choices
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and realizing that only you know what's best for you.
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Mommy guilt, or the pressure to prioritize family and caregiving, holds many women back from pursuing personal dreams and goals.
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The nagging question, what will they think, infiltrates their thoughts, causing many to abandon higher education or career plans.
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However, it's important to recognize that sometimes, being selfish is necessary to accomplish what you want in life.
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A prime example comes from the author's father, who was pursuing his Ph .D.
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One of his professors told the class that they needed to be selfish to complete the demanding coursework and thesis writing.
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If they weren't, family and friends could easily deter them from their efforts.
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This message holds true for anyone pursuing a goal that requires intense dedication and sacrifice.
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When contemplating a decision, try not to let fear of judgment dictate your choices.
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People can generally be categorized into judgmental individuals and those who are supportive and understanding.
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Judgmental people will criticize no matter what you do, so it's wise to follow your heart without worrying about their opinions.
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Fear of failure is another hurdle in the pursuit of success.
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It's not so much the fear of making mistakes, but the concern of how people will perceive those failures.
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The author has experienced public disappointments, such as a failed attempt to get one of her books onto the New York Times bestseller list.
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However, these setbacks provide valuable lessons that help build resilience and determination.
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Life's successes are often accompanied by previous failures, making each triumph all the more gratifying.
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Your power lies in choosing not to let others' opinions dictate your actions.
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After all, only you can determine what's best for you,
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and it's important to remember that most people spend less time thinking about your choices than you might imagine.
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So, say goodbye to guilt and unwarranted fears and embrace the path to personal success.
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Embrace ambition, reach your goals.
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Challenging the outdated belief that women shouldn't focus on money and wealth, it's important to break free from convention and pursue personal goals with determination.
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Develop a sense of self -authority, concentrate on one dream at a time, and implement the 10 -10 -1 plan to create a specific,
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measurable goal for the future.
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Writing down your dreams daily and visualizing them as
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if they have already come true will serve as powerful motivators to stay on track in achieving your aspirations.
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Let go of the age -old adage insisting that well -behaved women should stay silent about money and wealth.
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As historian Laurel Thatcher Ulrich notes, it's often those who disrupt conventional norms who make a lasting impact.
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Instead of suppressing your ambitions, adopt these helpful practices to increase your chances of successfully attaining your goals.
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First, stop seeking permission.
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Society may have conditioned women to rely on male voices for decision -making, but it's essential to recognize your own power to pursue your objectives.
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Grant yourself the autonomy to chase your dreams.
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Next, narrow your focus to one goal at a time.
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While having multiple projects might feel safe and minimize the impact of failure, it dilutes the potency of your efforts.
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To paraphrase the author, when everything is important, nothing is important.
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Dedicate your energy to a single, significant dream for optimal results.
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One method to streamline your aspirations is the 10 -10 -1 plan.
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Visualize your life 10 years from now in vivid detail, accounting for every aspect of your desired future.
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Then, list 10 specific dreams necessary to actualize your ideal life.
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From this list, choose the one most crucial goal to focus on.
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This 10 -10 -1 framework encourages concentration on a singular, meaningful objective.
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Ensure your primary goal is specific and measurable.
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For instance, aim for something like, I have $10 ,000 in my savings account, instead of the vaguer, I want to improve my money management.
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Tangible targets offer a clearer path for success.
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Lastly, write down your 10 dreams every day, depicting them as if they've already manifested.
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Phrasing your aspirations as statements of accomplishment, such as, I am an exceptional mom
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or I have $10 ,000 in my savings account will provide powerful daily motivation to stay committed to your path.
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By asserting your independence, refining your focus, and embracing the 10 -10 -1 plan,
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you will empower yourself to pursue your dreams boldly and relentlessly.
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Embrace your ambitions and create a better future for yourself.
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Building success, empowering behaviors.
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At the heart of every successful person is a strong support network, a healthy lifestyle, and an empowering community to foster growth.
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Mastering a good morning routine and learning to say no to events
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that don't excite you further strengthen the foundation of success and result in a more fulfilled life.
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Often, we view successful people as lone warriors who handle everything on their own, when in reality, they have a support system of friends,
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colleagues, and assistants to help them focus on their objectives.
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Embrace the idea of seeking assistance when needed to manage your day -to -day activities and propel you forward towards your goals.
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An essential part of realizing your aspirations is establishing a solid foundation in your life.
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Prioritize your physical and mental well -being by maintaining a healthy lifestyle, which includes staying hydrated, regular exercise, and waking up early each day.
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Remember that a healthy body translates to a healthier mind, allowing you to tackle challenges with ease and reach your dreams.
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Cultivate empowering relationships with those around you.
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If you find yourself being the smartest in your group, branch out and connect with people who share similar ambitions and motivate you to improve.
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The company you keep can have a profound impact on your overall growth and development.
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Adopt a consistent morning routine to instill positive habits and start your day on the right foot.
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Find activities that energize you in the early hours, such as meditation, journaling, or exercising, before moving on with the day's tasks.
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By taking control of your mornings, you set a positive tone for the rest of the day.
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Lastly, learn the power of saying no.
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Evaluate if a request or opportunity resonates with you by checking if the decision you make aligns with your core values.
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If it's not a strong yes, then respond with a polite, no, to maintain your integrity, focus, and direction towards your vision.
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Essential Skills for Goal -Getters To reach your goals effectively, you must cultivate a foundation of planning,
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confidence, persistence, effectiveness, positivity, and leadership.
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Master these skills through intentional practice, setting smaller milestones within your main goal, taking calculated risks, being specific in tasks,
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embracing continued learning, and understanding the true nature of leadership.
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Your ultimate success depends on how well you can hone essential skills that contribute to goal achievement.
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Any skill can be improved with intentional practice, so let's uncover the key abilities that you need to enhance.
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Planning is crucial in any pursuit.
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If you struggle with this skill, try the roadmap exercise.
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Start with setting a goal as the finish line and work backward.
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Consider the critical steps necessary to reach the end point,
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brainstorm related ideas, and narrow down to a set of milestones or smaller goals that lead to your main objective.
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For instance, if your goal is to publish a book, the milestones could be developing a book proposal,
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hiring a literary agent, and submitting your work to publishers.
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Confidence plays a vital role in pushing your limits.
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Research shows that men often apply for jobs when meeting only 60 % of the requirements,
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while women typically apply only if they feel 100 % qualified.
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Understand that you can learn and grow on the job, just as the author did when taking on a catering gig during the Sundance Film Festival.
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Her confidence in her event planning experience,
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which included catering responsibilities, made her snatch the opportunity despite seemingly insufficient expertise.
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Persistence and effectiveness are indispensable for progress.
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Recognize that your learning is never complete, there are always opportunities to develop further.
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Also, be specific when setting tasks, instead of noting, work on your book, specify, write 2000 words.
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This precision will enhance the effectiveness of your approach.
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Positivity and leadership are the final two skills that complete this arsenal.
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When things get messy, opting for gratitude and positivity, despite the difficulty, keeps you in control.
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As for leadership, let go of the stereotypes of power suits and large offices.
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Embrace the truth that leadership is within you, and your passion can inspire change in the world.
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By honing these essential skills, planning, confidence, persistence, effectiveness, positivity,
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and leadership, you stand on solid ground in your journey to reach your goals.
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Make the most of your potential and harness each of these powerful tools through intentional practice and unwavering dedication.
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in conclusion girl stop apologizing guides readers in breaking free from the barriers
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that prevent them from pursuing their desires wholeheartedly the overarching message is to recognize
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that everyone's dreams and aspirations look different
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and there's no need to apologize for deviating from societal norms
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the book summary showcases how to dismantle common excuses cultivate empowering behaviors,
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and adopt vital skills that enable readers to set and achieve their goals confidently.
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By taking charge of their lives, women can ultimately move toward a more fulfilled, successful, and unapologetic existence.
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Thank you.
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Vocabulary and speaking notes for this lesson
This speaking lesson is built on the video “Girl, Stop Apologizing by Rachel Hollis: 18 Minute Summary”. The speaker keeps coming back to these words: goal, dream, aspirations, skill, personal. This video has 170 sentences and 2516 words to shadow. The speech runs for 17:52. The speaker talks at a steady 141 words per minute, a comfortable pace for shadowing. Only 75% of the words are among the 3,000 most common in English, so the vocabulary is demanding.
Key vocabulary in this video
15 words from the video worth learning, with pronunciation and meaning:
| Word | Pronunciation | Meaning |
|---|---|---|
| embrace verb | /ɛmˈbɹes/ | To clasp (someone or each other) in the arms with affection; to take in the arms; to hug. |
| pursue verb | /pɚˈsu/ | To follow urgently, originally with intent to capture or harm; to chase. |
| expectation noun | /ˌɛk.spɛkˈteɪ.ʃən/ | The act or state of expecting or looking forward to an event as about to happen. |
| empower verb | /ɪmˈpaʊ.ə/ | To give permission, power, or the legal right to do something. |
| guilt noun | /ɡɪlt/ | Responsibility for wrongdoing. |
| societal adjective | [səˈsaɪ.ɪ.tɫ̩] | Of or pertaining to society or social groups, or to their activities, customs, etc. |
| dictate verb | /ˈdɪkˌteɪt/ | To order, command, control. |
| objective noun | /ɒbˈd͡ʒɛk.tɪv/ | A material object that physically exists. |
| crucial adjective | /ˈkɹuː.ʃəl/ | Essential or decisive for determining the outcome or future of something; extremely important; vital. |
| apologize verb | /əˈpɑləˌd͡ʒaɪz/ | To make an apology or excuse; to acknowledge some fault or offense, with expression of regret for it, by way of amends |
| pursuit noun | /pɝˈsut/ | The act of pursuing. |
| effectiveness noun | /ɪˈfɛk.tɪv.nɪs/ | The property of being effective, of achieving results. |
| ambition noun | /æmˈbɪʃ.ən/ | Eager or inordinate desire for some object that confers distinction, as preferment, honor, superiority, political power, or fame; desire to distinguish one's… |
| encourage verb | /ɪnˈkʌɹ.ɪd͡ʒ/ | To mentally support; to motivate, give courage, hope or spirit. |
| vital adjective | /ˈvaɪtəl/ | Relating to or characteristic of life. |
Phrasal verbs you will hear
| Word | Pronunciation | Meaning |
|---|---|---|
| write down verb | To produce or set (something) down in writing; to record something. | |
| branch out verb | To expand in the manner of branches. | |
| move forward verb | To cause to make progress. | |
| take back verb | To retract or withdraw (an earlier statement). | |
| wake up verb | /ˌweɪk ˈʌp/ | To stop sleeping; to awake. |
Grammar in this video
The structures the speaker uses most, with the exact words from the video:
| Structure | In the video |
|---|---|
| Passive voice be + past participle — the focus is on what happens, not who does it | are encouraged · will be dismantled · being influenced |
| Present perfect have/has + past participle — a past action that still matters now | has experienced · have already come · they've already manifested |
| Relative clauses who / which + clause — extra information about a person or thing | those who are · those who disrupt · people who share |
Pronunciation to watch
The speaker uses 5 contractions and reduced forms, such as don't, shouldn't, they've. Say them the short way, as you hear them.
- The “th” sounds: marathon /ˈmæɹəθən/, thesis /ˈθisɪs/, authentic /ɔˈθɛn.tɪk/, strengthen /ˈstɹɛŋ(k)θən/
- The “sh” and “zh” sounds: expectation /ˌɛk.spɛkˈteɪ.ʃən/, crucial /ˈkɹuː.ʃəl/, ambition /æmˈbɪʃ.ən/, intentional /ɪnˈtɛnʃənəl/, passion /ˈpæʃən/
- Long words — get the stress right: expectation /ˌɛk.spɛkˈteɪ.ʃən/, apologize /əˈpɑləˌd͡ʒaɪz/, effectiveness /ɪˈfɛk.tɪv.nɪs/, intentional /ɪnˈtɛnʃənəl/, determination /dɪˌtɜːmɪˈneɪʃən/
How to practise with this video
- Listen to the whole video once without speaking and note the words you do not know.
- Shadow it sentence by sentence at normal speed, repeating each one until your rhythm matches the speaker.
- Record yourself and compare with the original, paying attention to words like embrace, pursue, expectation.
What is the Shadowing Technique?
Shadowing is a science-backed language learning technique originally developed for professional interpreter training and popularized by polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. The method is simple but powerful: you listen to native English audio and immediately repeat it out loud — like a shadow following the speaker with just a 1–2 second delay. Unlike passive listening or grammar drills, shadowing forces your brain and mouth muscles to simultaneously process and reproduce real speech patterns. Research shows it significantly improves pronunciation accuracy, intonation, rhythm, connected speech, listening comprehension, and speaking fluency — making it one of the most effective methods for IELTS Speaking preparation and real-world English communication.