Pratique du Shadowing: The Four Agreements - FULL Summary - Apprendre l'anglais à l'oral avec YouTube
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Some people walk through chaos like it's nothing.
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Some people walk through chaos like it's nothing.
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No drama, no overthinking, just peace,
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even when life's on fire.
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It's not magic, it's a mental framework,
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one that rewires how you respond to everything.
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If you've ever felt triggered by someone's words,
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tired of overreacting to things that shouldn't matter,
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or crushed by your own thoughts,
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then these four mental habits are exactly what you need.
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They come from the book,
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The Four Agreements, A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom.
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They're simple, yet so powerful.
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So let's begin.
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Agreement number one, be careful with your words.
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There was a woman who was intelligent and had a very good heart.
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She had a little daughter she loved very much.
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One night, she came home from a terrible day at work,
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tired, stressed, and with a terrible headache.
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She just wanted a quiet, relaxing moment at home.
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But her daughter?
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She was singing and dancing, full of joy.
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Too loud, too much, and in that moment, the mother snapped.
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Shut up!
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You have an ugly voice!
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Can you just shut up?
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Her voice wasn't ugly, but the little girl believed it.
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After that, she no longer sang,
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because she believed her voice was ugly and would bother anyone who heard it.
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She became shy at school,
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and even speaking to others became difficult for her.
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The little girl grew up,
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and even though she had a beautiful voice, she never sang again.
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Look, words are powerful.
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They can create the most beautiful dream or destroy everything around you.
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Words are like seeds, and our minds are like fertile ground.
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If we say bad things to others,
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we are throwing a bad seed into their minds,
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and that seed will grow,
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just like a real seed grows into a tree.
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That little girl grew up shy,
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all because her mother threw a bad seed by saying her voice was ugly.
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Now here's what most people miss.
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It's not just about what you say to others.
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It's about what you say to yourself, too.
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I'm so dumb.
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I always screw this up.
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No one likes me.
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Those words are like bad seeds,
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and if you repeat them enough,
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you'll start to believe them and live like they're true.
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But here's the good news.
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If words are like seeds,
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you can also choose to plant good seeds instead.
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So use positive words for yourself.
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And here's another moment where we need to be careful with our words.
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The author says that being careful with your words also means not gossiping about others.
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Imagine you're excited to join a new class,
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and someone who already took that class says to you,
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oh, that teacher is a jerk.
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He didn't know what he was talking about,
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and he was a pervert too, so watch out.
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Some part of you believes it,
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and you go to the class.
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As the teacher speaks, you don't realize that you're seeing him through the lens of the person who started that gossip.
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Then you spread the gossip to others,
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and they start seeing the teacher the same way too,
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a jerk and a pervert.
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Eventually, you hate the class and drop out,
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but it wasn't the teacher.
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It was the bad words planted by the person who started the gossip.
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Now, consider how many times you've gossiped about someone,
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just to gain support for your point of view.
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But your opinion is just that,
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your opinion, your point of view.
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It's not necessarily true.
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Your opinion comes from your beliefs and your own perception.
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So be careful with your words,
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what you say to others,
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what you say to yourself,
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and even what you say behind others.
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And what if someone talks badly about you?
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And that goes to our second agreement,
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which is don't take anything personally.
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Let's be real.
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Someone talks behind your back or says something bad straight to your face, it definitely hurts.
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And it's hard not to take it personally.
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But here's the truth.
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Nothing others say or do is because of you.
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It's always about them.
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Their beliefs, their wounds, their bad day,
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just their whole internal story,
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which, by the way, has almost nothing to do with you.
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Remember the mother-daughter story?
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The little girl's voice wasn't ugly.
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The mother was exhausted, stressed,
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and had a pounding headache.
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Her harsh words weren't about her daughter.
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It was her own pain exploding outward.
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But the little girl suffered because she took it personally.
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Look, words only hurt when you agree with them.
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For example, if someone says,
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you're stupid, if you don't believe that, it bounces right off.
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But if you do believe it,
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even a little, that word sinks in,
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becomes poison, and sticks around for years.
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When someone judges you, they're reacting to a version of you they've created in their mind.
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It's not even a real you.
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So don't take it personally.
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The author says even if someone points a gun at you,
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don't take it personally.
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Because even then, it's not about you.
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That person is dealing with their own wounds,
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their anger, and their own story.
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When you take something personally,
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it's like eating someone else's emotional garbage.
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They throw it at you, and you swallow it.
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Now their garbage becomes yours.
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The truth is, that person is just dealing with their own feelings and opinions.
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Even praise works the same way.
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When someone's happy, they say,
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you're amazing, you're an angel.
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But when they're angry, they flip.
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You're terrible, the worst.
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What changed?
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Not you.
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Their mood did.
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And when their mood shifts,
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their version of you shifts with it.
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When you stop taking things personally, life gets lighter.
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You avoid unnecessary drama.
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Anger and sadness fade faster.
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The whole world can gossip about you,
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but if you don't take it personally, you stay immune.
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Someone could intentionally send emotional poison to you,
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but if you don't pick it up,
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the poison stays with them.
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If you don't take anything personally,
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you can travel the world with your heart completely open,
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and no one can hurt you.
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Agreement number three.
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Don't make assumptions.
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The husband glances at his phone and smiles.
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The wife's thinking, he's texting another woman now.
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You text a friend.
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Two hours pass, and no reply.
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Did he block me?
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Is he mad at me?
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Your boss says, can we talk?
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Oh, no, I'm in trouble.
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Look, we tend to make assumptions about everything.
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We assume, we misunderstand, we take it personally,
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and we create a whole movie in our head that never even existed.
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Here's the problem with making assumptions.
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We believe they are the truth.
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The truth is we don't know if we don't ask.
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Let's take a relationship example.
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A husband comes home from work,
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his wife is mad, cold,
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distant, and he has no idea why.
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And the wife thinks, he should know why.
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If he loved me, he would know.
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She made an assumption.
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Instead of asking for what she needed,
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she expected him to read her mind.
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When he failed, she took it personally and the gap between them grew.
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And remember the example we talked about earlier,
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how the husband looks at his phone and smiles.
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The wife assumes he's cheating,
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and she takes it personally.
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Now she's even mad, not over something real,
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but over an assumption she made up on her own.
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That's how fast assumptions can hurt feelings and ruin trust,
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which leads to a lot of trouble with people we supposedly love.
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But this is not just for couples.
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We make assumptions everywhere, at work,
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with friends, with neighbors, even with strangers at the supermarket.
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We assume, we misunderstand, and in the end,
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we either get mad or we get sad.
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It happens without a single real word being spoken.
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And what's even worse, we also tend to start gossiping based on assumptions.
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We believe that assumption is true,
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and then we spread it to someone else.
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For example, your cousin stays at home during the workday,
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so you assume he's lazy for not finding a job.
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But maybe he's working from home.
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Maybe he built a business and doesn't need a nine-to-five anymore.
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You don't know.
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You never ask or clarify.
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You just assume, and you already spread your assumption to other relatives.
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He's lazy.
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He's wasting his life.
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That's how fast poison spreads.
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All without a single real fact.
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Look, don't just assume.
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Ask.
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Clarify.
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If your friend doesn't reply to your message,
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instead of assuming he blocked you, just call and ask.
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Maybe he was just busy and put his phone on flight mode.
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If your colleague misses a deadline at work,
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instead of assuming he's lazy,
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just send a quick message and ask.
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The day you stop assuming, you'll start living lighter.
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You'll start communicating clearly.
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And most importantly, you can put the drama to rest.
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But here's one last thing you need to end all the unnecessary drama in your life,
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which is agreement number four.
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Always do your best.
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Two people show up at the gym.
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One feels great and lifts heavy.
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The other has a cold and barely finishes a light workout.
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Now, who did their best?
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Both.
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Because doing your best isn't a fixed target.
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It changes moment to moment.
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On some days, your best is 10 out of 10.
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Because you're sharp, energized, focused, you crush it.
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But other days, you're tired,
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sick, overwhelmed, and your best might only be a three. And that's okay.
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But just knowing your best isn't a fixed target?
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That's not enough.
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Here are three more things you need to know if you want to always do your best.
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Number one, don't overdo it and don't underdo it.
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This is the trap most people fall into when they do something,
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whether it's at work, in a relationship,
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or in anything they do.
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Sometimes we overdo it and burn ourselves out,
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or sometimes we give less than our best and regret it later.
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When you give what you can,
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no more, no less, You have nothing to feel guilty about,
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and you will have no regrets.
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Number two, don't just act for the reward.
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Doing your best means loving the process,
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not just chasing a prize.
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For example, some people only give effort when they expect a reward.
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They work for the paycheck or they chase the applause.
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Look, it's not wrong to get paid for work,
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but if your eyes are locked on the reward,
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you won't do your best.
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You might rush.
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You just want to finish it.
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But if you rush, will you be able to give your best?
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When you act because you love the work itself or you care about the craft, everything changes.
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You give more, not because you're forced to do it,
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but because you want to.
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Rewards will come, money will come,
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but your best no longer depends on them.
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And here's the beauty.
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When you live this way,
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your best naturally gets better over time.
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Number three, be in the present moment.
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Whatever life takes away from you, let it go.
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Doing your best also means living fully in the moment,
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not dragging yesterday's weight into today.
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Old failures, old regrets, they don't belong here anymore.
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If you stay stuck in the past,
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you'll miss the life happening in front of you, right here, right now.
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You'll always wish it was different.
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And when your mind is trapped in yesterday,
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you can't give your true best today.
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The author says, honor the man or woman you are right now.
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Live fully in the present by taking care of your body.
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Feed it, move it, respect it,
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and your best will follow.
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All right, to always do your best, remember these four things.
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Your best isn't a fixed target.
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Don't overdo it or underdo it.
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Don't just act for the reward and be in the present moment.
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All right, to recap all four agreements we discussed in this video.
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Number one, be careful with your words.
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Number two, don't take anything personally.
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Number three, don't make assumptions.
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Number four, always do your best.
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The first three only work when you commit to the fourth.
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When you do your best,
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the habits of misusing your words,
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taking things personally, and making assumptions will become weaker and less frequent.
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The suffering disappears and the noise inside gets quieter.
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And one last thing, the author reminds us,
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to truly do your best,
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you have to let go of your past.
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And if letting go feels hard, don't worry.
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You need practical advice.
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If you want real advice that helps,
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check out the video you see on your screen.
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It's the summary of The Untethered Soul.
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This is one of the three books I reread every year to remind myself how to live now
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and finally let go of yesterday.
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Thanks for watching.
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Time is the most valuable currency we have and you chose to spend some of it on this video.
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I hope it helped you to become a little bit better.
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Have a great day.
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About This Lesson
In this lesson, you will practice your English speaking skills through the insightful concepts presented in the video "The Four Agreements - FULL Summary." You will explore how powerful words can shape our lives and the importance of mindfulness in our communication. This material not only serves as an excellent opportunity to improve English vocabulary and comprehension but also highlights how our internal dialogue influences our self-esteem and interactions with others. By engaging with this content, you will strengthen your understanding of how to express yourself clearly and positively, leading to enhanced communication skills in English.
Key Vocabulary & Phrases
- Mindful: being aware of your thoughts and feelings without judgment.
- Overthinking: excessive thinking about a situation or problem.
- Validation: recognition or affirmation that a person’s feelings or opinions are worthwhile.
- Fertile ground: a metaphor for a mind receptive to ideas and influences.
- Negative self-talk: the inner dialogue that tells you negative statements about yourself.
- Triggered: experiencing a strong emotional reaction to a stimulus.
- Agreement: a mutual understanding or a pact made between parties.
- Seed: in this context, it refers to ideas planted in the mind that can grow into beliefs.
Practice Tips
To maximize your learning experience with this video, try the following shadowing techniques:
- Watch and Listen: First, watch the video without trying to speak. Focus on the pronunciation and intonation of the speaker.
- Repeat Out Loud: Play short segments of the video and pause after each sentence. Repeat what you heard, mimicking the speaker's tone and rhythm. This technique, known as shadow speech, helps improve English pronunciation and fluency.
- Slow Down: If the speaker is too fast, use playback settings to slow down the video. This allows you to articulate the words clearly and practice at a manageable pace.
- Record Yourself: After shadowing, record your voice. This will help you identify areas of improvement, such as pronunciation and clarity.
- Reflect on Meaning: After practicing, take time to consider the meaning behind the words. Understand how they relate to everyday situations, which can deepen your vocabulary in real-life contexts.
By incorporating these practices into your routine, you will not only learn English with YouTube seamlessly but also enhance your confidence in speaking through shadowspeak. This focused approach will help you cultivate a positive inner dialogue, which is as important as the words you share with others.
Qu'est-ce que la technique du Shadowing ?
Le Shadowing est une technique d'apprentissage des langues fondée sur la science, développée à l'origine pour la formation des interprètes professionnels. Le principe est simple mais puissant : vous écoutez de l'anglais natif et le répétez immédiatement à voix haute — comme une ombre suivant le locuteur avec un décalage de 1 à 2 secondes. Les recherches montrent une amélioration significative de la précision de la prononciation, de l'intonation, du rythme, des liaisons, de la compréhension orale et de la fluidité.
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