シャドーイング練習: Why Feeling Lonely Means Your Life Is About to Level Up - YouTubeで英語スピーキングを学ぶ
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So you probably clicked on this video because you feel lonely.
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So you probably clicked on this video because you feel lonely.
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And guess what?
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If that's you, you are not alone because your girl feels lonely right now.
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Very lonely.
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And actually one of my clearest,
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earliest memories of feeling genuinely lonely was back when I was 18 years old and I was a freshman at NYU.
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I remember it like it was yesterday, okay?
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It was a Friday night.
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I was sitting alone in my dorm room crying in my bed because both of my roommates had plans.
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And it was my third weekend in a row spending it by myself.
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And it just felt like everyone and their mom had friends except for me.
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Everyone had their friend group.
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Everyone belonged.
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And I was just always alone.
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And I even remember like my mom calling me and asking, how's college?
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How are you enjoying it?
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And I lied to her.
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I was like, I love it here.
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I love it here.
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I have so many friends.
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It was all a lie.
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And it was because I didn't want to admit to her that I felt lonely.
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And you know, for context,
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my parents are both Korean immigrants.
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They literally sacrificed everything for me to be able to go to school.
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And so the guilt of telling them
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that I was actually struggling in school almost felt heavier than the loneliness itself I remember I would eat lunch alone.
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I would walk to class alone I sat alone in my
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dorm room feeling like everyone else had found their people
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and I just didn't and you know Your girl knows what it feels like to feel lonely.
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Okay, it's not fun It sucks and at 18 years old
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that moment felt like the end of the world and I actually just turned 26 So your girl is grown.
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I have the friends that i've always wanted.
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I have my dream career.
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I have my dream apartment I'm finally financially stable yet.
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I still feel lonely at times.
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I feel very lonely right now.
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And that's actually why I wanted to make this video to help you better understand why you may feel lonely
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and to remind you that what you're feeling right now doesn't mean that there's something wrong with you.
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And if you use this lonely season,
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right, you can actually transform yourself into the best,
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most confident version of yourself.
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If you're new here, hello,
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my name is Lena and I share all things leveling up and becoming your best self.
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So if you're not already subscribed, what are you doing?
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Okay.
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What are you doing?
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Go subscribe right now.
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By the way, how are we liking this new podcast setup?
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We're trying something new.
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I'm holding the mic this time.
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Let me know how you guys feel about it.
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I read all the comments.
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So what loneliness feels like.
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So loneliness is that feeling that you get when you're by yourself and you just don't feel like you're at peace.
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And honestly, the best way I can describe it is it's like a sinking feeling.
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It's like a pit in your stomach.
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And it almost feels like you're drowning.
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You're like drowning in water,
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but no one else sees.
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It's like a heavy feeling in your chest.
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Like for me, sometimes when I feel lonely,
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it literally feels like my stomach is empty,
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like so empty that it's almost painful.
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I found this photo that actually depicts the feeling really well.
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And actually, fun fact, feeling lonely doesn't mean you're actually physically alone.
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It could be that heavy feeling you get when the day is almost done,
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when your day is going by and you just don't know what to do with yourself,
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when you're constantly checking your phone but no one is texting or calling you,
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when you want to talk to somebody but you feel like you have no one to reach out to.
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Sometimes feeling lonely shows up as you constantly scrolling on your phone
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because maybe you're bored because maybe sitting with your own thoughts is just uncomfortable.
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It also looks like staying super busy so you don't have to feel the lonely feeling.
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And sometimes it's really confusing too.
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Sometimes your life is going well, it's going fine.
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And you wonder like, why do I feel lonely when my life is fine?
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And then maybe you start to feel guilty for feeling lonely.
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So that's what basically loneliness feels like, at least to me.
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So for me, when I was 18 years old,
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feeling super lonely every single day,
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I always thought it was just because I was struggling to make friends in college.
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But thinking about it now,
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there were so many layers to it, girl.
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Like, first of all, NYU is a pretty prestigious school.
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And majority of the people that go there come from very wealthy backgrounds.
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You know, private school, boarding school.
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I come from a lower income background, public school education.
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My parents were both working class immigrants.
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And so I already went to NYU feeling like less than.
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And also, when your girl first got there,
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tell me why everyone and their mom already had their friend groups already.
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Because apparently NYU had a Facebook group where you could join and literally meet people before school even started.
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No one told me about this Facebook group.
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okay so everyone came to school first day school everyone knew everybody
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and i was looking around like hello like how do you all know each other
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and i remember there was this one girl group
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that it was just like the prettiest girls they were dressed like fabulous
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and i remember i went up to them
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and i was trying to make friends with them i was being friendly with them
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and they actually invited me out to eat
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which i was like yay i finally made my friends tell me why
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when i get back to my dorm room i look up the restaurant
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that they're trying to go to three dollar signs I was like,
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um, I was a broke college student.
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Okay.
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And I do not come from money.
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Like $3 signs is crazy.
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So I texted them that I didn't feel well just to make an excuse.
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So I didn't have to go.
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And after I skipped out on that meal,
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they never invited me again.
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And they ended up being close all throughout college.
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And after that moment, I felt even more lonely.
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Why you feel lonely.
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So actually a lot of times loneliness happens when you're in the middle of a transition season when you're growing,
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when you're healing, you're outgrowing old versions of yourself.
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Maybe you're outgrowing some friends,
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people that you were friends with for years.
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Maybe you don't relate to them anymore.
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And that's actually really normal.
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You know, when you're friends with people,
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everyone is going through different stages of their life.
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You know, especially during like the college years.
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I remember like some people were going to college.
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Some people were getting married, having kids.
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Other people were like partying all the time.
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There's other people already working full time.
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So you often feel loneliness when things are changing around you.
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And when things are changing, it feels uncomfortable.
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It feels unfamiliar.
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And you might not understand why you feel lonely,
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but it makes sense, you know?
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So why I feel lonely now.
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So I wanted to kind of open up about why I am actually struggling with loneliness right now,
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because I thought, you know,
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the last time I felt super lonely was when I was 18 years old and was struggling to make friends in college.
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Your girl is grown now.
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I'm 26 and I still feel lonely.
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And I had to figure out why I felt lonely
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because even though I've come such a long way from that 18 year old version of myself that,
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you know, was super insecure,
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struggled to make friends, was a broke college student, like had zero confidence.
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You know, like on paper,
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my life looks a lot better now.
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Okay.
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It looks like your girl's up.
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I can eat at the restaurants with the $3 signs.
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Now I have the career of my dreams,
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the career that I used to dream every single day about.
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I have amazing friends.
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I have an amazing supportive community of a million of you who give me so much life and purpose.
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I live in a beautiful apartment in my dream city in New York city.
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I have an amazing family.
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So from the outside, you know,
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it probably looks like I have it all.
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Like I even had to ask myself,
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like, why do I even feel lonely right now?
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You have everything that you've ever asked God for right now.
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I'm actually in a healing season or transition season.
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Last year, I got out of a five-year relationship.
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And when you go from spending every single day with a person,
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building your entire future around a person,
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giving so much of yourself to another person to all of a sudden trying to navigate life alone,
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spending every day alone, trying to be alone with yourself and your thoughts,
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trying to comfort and soothe yourself.
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Like it's been a loneliness that I've never experienced before.
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Also at the same time that I got out of that relationship,
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I made the decision to cut off my dad and he was an abusive alcoholic my entire life.
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We were never close, but mourning the relationship I never got to have with my dad.
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And also mourning the fact that I never got the dad that I deserved and understanding as an adult,
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how he has destroyed and negatively affected our family.
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That has been another experience of loneliness that I've never felt before.
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And just processing how both of those relationships were not healthy for me all of
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that together has added an immense amount of loneliness into my life
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that i'm not gonna lie i was not prepared for
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and you know i'm doing the right things now like i'm
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in therapy i'm in my word i'm praying every single day
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i'm really prioritizing my healing i'm setting boundaries i know i'm doing all the right things
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but even in all that and doing all the right things i still feel really lonely
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and it's really hard for me to admit but last year
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when i was going through all this a bunch of you guys didn't even know
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because I was trying to escape the loneliness.
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Okay.
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I didn't want you guys to see me struggling.
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I didn't want to show anybody that I was struggling and feeling lonely.
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So my instinct was to escape.
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Okay.
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I was traveling everywhere around the world.
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Like literally within a few months,
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I went from going to Italy, Portugal, London, Canada.
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I was staying super busy with work.
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I was still posting all the time.
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I was surrounding myself with all my friends,
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going out, grinding at my work.
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And I did all of that to help me feel less lonely.
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And it worked temporarily.
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But guys at the end of it it all left me feeling even more lonely
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and even more empty
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So even though on the outside still my life might look like it's up internally I'm telling you guys every single day.
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I've been battling loneliness
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But let me tell you guys why I know feeling lonely
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as uncomfortable as it is as much as I hate it
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is essential for me right now Especially in my healing season my self-worth
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and my standards are now rising faster than my loneliness feeling
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And that just proved to me that loneliness is an essential part of your healing journey So girl,
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I know how much it sucks.
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Okay, the feeling is not fun.
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Feeling lonely, it sucks.
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Like it really does.
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It really does.
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My instinct is just to want to escape it,
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but sitting in it is the hard thing.
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It's easy to distract yourself with your friends,
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to go travel, to keep yourself busy with work,
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to go out partying, to jump into another relationship,
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to not think about it.
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But sitting in your thoughts and your loneliness and feeling the discomfort,
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that is where you're going to grow the most.
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And I know this
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because I've had the most growth in the past month where I've sat in the loneliness and embraced it.
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Seek the support you need.
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So, you know, from dealing with a five-year breakup and,
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and cutting off my dad in the past six months,
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I tried the method of distracting.
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You know, I kept telling myself to push through,
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push through to be strong, to continue on.
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And eventually I just hit my breaking point where I finally realized I couldn't distract myself anymore.
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I don't need to push harder.
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I don't need to work harder.
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I need support.
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And that's why I'm so grateful that this video is sponsored by BetterHelp.
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And I just like love their mission.
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And this past month, especially I've been prioritizing my healing and just growing and started focusing on myself and understanding myself.
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And therapy has played a huge part in that guys.
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What I love about BetterHelp is how simple it is to get started.
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After signing up, you just fill out a questionnaire
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and they match you with a licensed therapist based on your preferences and their clinical experience.
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And if the therapist isn't the right fit for you,
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you can switch at any time with no extra cost,
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which is honestly so helpful because I know how intimidating starting therapy can be.
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Sessions can be done by video phone or live chat.
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So if it's your life,
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even if things get busy,
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therapy has helped me so much.
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It's helped me understand myself better,
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my emotions, to build self-trust,
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self-worth instead of just running on pressure.
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So you can join the 6 million plus people who have gotten help from BetterHelp.
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You can click the link in my description
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or go to betterhelp.com slash leanalifts to get 10% off your first month of therapy.
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So this is probably no surprise,
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but social media makes our loneliness so much worse.
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Studies have consistently shown that the more time people spend on social media,
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the lonelier they report feeling,
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especially when they're using it to stay connected,
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which funny enough, that is the point of social media to help us feel more connected.
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But the irony is that it's making us feel lonelier.
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And research across adults of different ages found that frequent social media use is strongly associated with loneliness,
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even when people have jobs,
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friends, and have full lives.
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And just think about it.
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Every single time you scroll and scroll,
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you're being fed everyone else's lives,
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everyone else's highlight reels, their perfect photos,
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their perfect moments, their perfect vacation.
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And it makes you feel lonelier.
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It makes you feel isolated.
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And then you start constantly comparing yourself to everyone else's life that you see on social media.
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And because you're only seeing the perfect moments,
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you might feel like your life is not good enough.
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And I am proof of that, okay?
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When I was going through all my hormonal imbalances and acne blew up all over my face,
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I was barely leaving my apartment.
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I spent every single weekend inside.
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I never wanted to go outside.
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I felt horrible about myself.
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My self-esteem was like to the ground.
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I felt so lonely.
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And to escape that loneliness,
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I would start scrolling on my phone.
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And one hour would turn to two, two, three.
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And then all of a sudden my whole day would be gone from just scrolling.
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And instead of helping me feel more connected with other people and feel less lonely,
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it made me feel worse.
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I'd finish scrolling and I'd feel even more lonely,
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even more depressed, even more insecure.
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And then on top of that,
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I would feel even worse about myself because I wasted all my time just scrolling and scrolling.
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And so it was just like this negative cycle loop.
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I would feel lonely, then scroll to escape,
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feel worse, then scroll more.
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And look, I've tried to do screen time limits.
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I tried to do social media cleanses.
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And honestly, none of that really worked for me long-term.
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I just realized that I needed to be intentional with where my attention was going.
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So I started using tools like journaling every single morning, praying every day.
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I also created Cove, which is my app that I literally created to document my own routines,
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my thoughts, my moments, my progress.
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So using tools like journaling,
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like Cove, that are intentional tools to help you focus back on yourself instead of focusing on other people on social media,
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that has been a game changer for helping me not doom scroll anymore.
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And it's helped me feel less lonely.
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You're alone, but not lonely.
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So another big lesson I've learned is that being alone doesn't automatically mean you're lonely.
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Like before, whenever I'd feel lonely,
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I thought that the solution was to never be alone,
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to always have plans, to always have people around,
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to always keep myself busy.
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But what I've realized is being alone is so important because
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when you're alone with your thoughts and yourself
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and you have to sit with yourself and you learn to be at peace with that feeling,
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you don't wait for someone else to make you feel whole.
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You don't settle for less than what you deserve.
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You're not scrolling and scrolling to fill the silence.
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You're not chasing plans and friends just to avoid your thoughts.
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You start paying attention to your own life again, to yourself.
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You start building confidence.
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You start growing.
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And that's why it's actually really important to understand the difference between feeling lonely and being alone because you could feel lonely,
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but you could enjoy being alone.
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And if you're in a season right now where you're spending more time with yourself,
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you feel a lot more lonely than usual.
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That does not mean your life is over,
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that you are unwanted, that you are unworthy.
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It is actually quite the opposite.
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You are learning self-worth.
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You are learning to love yourself.
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You are learning to be comfortable with yourself.
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You are learning to love yourself.
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I'm telling you, learning how to be with yourself is a skill that will change everything for you.
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It will change you.
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You will radiate confidence.
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You'll be the best version that you've ever been.
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Like this is just a season and it is temporary because let me tell you,
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after the season, you are about to grow and glow up like you've never seen before.
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There are people who care even if it doesn't feel like it.
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So when you're feeling lonely,
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sometimes your brain like lies to you and it makes you feel like no one else around you cares,
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that you're just invisible, that you don't matter,
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that you're unworthy, that you're not chosen,
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that no one wants you.
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But that is just not the truth, okay?
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Loneliness can quite literally just distort your perspective.
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And a perfect example of this is actually back freshman year when I was 18 and I was struggling to make friends.
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I was so lonely spending every single weekend alone.
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It was actually one of the friday nights
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that I spent alone in my dorm room and that night in particular I was over it.
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I was like I cannot spend another friday night alone
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So at the time my parents were not home They were in korea
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and so I took a bus from new york to new jersey to my parents apartment
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Because that's how lonely I was I would rather be alone
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in my parents apartment in jersey than alone in my dorm room in NYU Well,
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my older brother june who was also in college at the time He's two years older than me that day.
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He decided to stop by my parents apartment I think to pick up something
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and he opened the door thinking that no one was gonna be there right
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because my parents were off in korea And he opens the door
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and he just sees me sitting in the kitchen by myself He actually got scared when he saw me.
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He's like what the heck lena?
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What are you doing here?
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And guys I broke down to him I was sobbing my
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eyes out to him He's the first person I told like the truth
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that I was struggling and I felt really lonely in college and I hated college And he didn't lecture me.
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He didn't try to fix it He just like listened and my brother's not like an emotionally I don't know expressive person.
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So he just sat there and listened to me,
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which that was enough for me.
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Even him listening.
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I appreciated it.
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And he just tells me grab your stuff.
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We're going.
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And I was like, what?
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Like, where are we going?
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He doesn't even answer me.
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We get in his car and he drives me back to New York City.
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I was like, bruh, this guy's driving me back to NYU where I was trying to escape from like my brother sucks.
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And I thought he was driving me to NYU.
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He actually ended up taking me to a restaurant.
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And I remember it to this day because it's still one of my favorite restaurants to this day.
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It's called Rosemary's here in New York City.
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I've never eaten at such a nice restaurant in New York City before.
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I was like so amazed.
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That restaurant is gorgeous.
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And he bought me a plate of pasta.
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And thinking about it now as a grown adult,
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I'm like, what my brother did for me was crazy because he was only 20 at the time.
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He was only 20 years old.
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He was not balling like that financially either.
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But he took me out to eat, which I really appreciated.
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Spent his Friday night with his little sister at this restaurant in New York City.
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I'm looking at this gorgeous plate of pasta in front of me.
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And he tells me, you think those girls at NYU are better than you because they can afford this $14 plate of pasta?
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He's like, you have so much more to offer.
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You go to the same school as them.
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You need to see yourself as an equal and not shrink.
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And that moment changed everything for me because what he said was facts and it was great advice.
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But also I realized that just because you feel lonely doesn't mean that you're unloved.
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A lot of times the people who do really care about you aren't showing up for you
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because they don't know what you're going through.
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So that's why if you feel this way right now,
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reach out to your sister,
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your friend, your mom, your cousin,
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your childhood friend that you haven't spoken to since middle school, your therapist.
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Okay, there is someone out there for everyone.
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We are social creatures.
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Okay.
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We are not meant to be alone all the time with our own thoughts
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And
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if you're in a season of life where you genuinely don't have someone to reach out to you I'm here
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and that's honestly why youtube has always been my favorite platform It feels like you are friends with the person
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that you're watching That's how I feel with my favorite youtubers
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And I hope that's the way that you guys feel with me
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And if you're struggling with feeling lonely right now comment down below
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because we have built a community of Amazing girlies who are just trying to be the best version of ourselves
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and we are hype women.
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Okay, we hype each other up So if you're feeling lonely right now,
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I know that there's someone out there in our community that will comment back to you and help you feel less alone.
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Listen to me when I say this.
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You are loved.
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You are important.
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And you don't have to feel lonely.
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I really hope this video helped you guys.
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And if you're a real one,
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follow your girl on Instagram and TikTok.
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I post more content on there.
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I love you guys so, so much.
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And I hope to catch you in my next video.
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Bye.
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The Ups finally made from the G-Nine
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このレッスンについて
このレッスンでは、孤独という感情に焦点を当て、その感情を通じて自己成長の可能性について学びます。動画の中で話された内容を使って、英語の語彙やフレーズの理解を深め、自信を持って話す力を身に付けることを目指します。孤独を感じることがあるのは普通であり、それを乗り越える方法やヒントも学びます。あなたの英語の発音を良くするためのシャドーイング練習としても最適です。
重要な語彙とフレーズ
- lonely - 孤独な
- freshman - 大学1年生
- struggling - 苦しんでいる
- friend group - 友達グループ
- dream career - 夢のキャリア
- financially stable - 経済的に安定している
- leveling up - ステップアップすること
- transform - 変化させる
練習のコツ
この動画の内容を使って英語シャドーイングを行う際は、以下のポイントを意識しましょう。動画は感情豊かに語られているため、特に感情の表現を真似することが重要です。言葉のスピードも適度で、ゆっくりですが流れるように話されますので、解説と合わせて何度も聞き返しながら練習してください。自分の声を録音し、発音やイントネーションを比較することも効果的です。また、「shadowspeak」や「shadowing site」を活用して、自分の発音を向上させるための資源としてみてください。新しい語彙やフレーズを繰り返し練習することで、自信がつき、スピーキング力が向上するでしょう。
シャドーイングとは？英語上達に効果的な理由
シャドーイング（Shadowing）は、もともとプロの通訳者養成プログラムで開発された言語学習法で、多言語習得者として知られるDr. Alexander Arguelles によって広く普及されました。方法はシンプルですが非常に効果的：ネイティブスピーカーの英語を聞きながら、1〜2秒の遅延で声に出してすぐに繰り返す——まるで「影（shadow）」のように話者を追いかけます。文法ドリルや受動的なリスニングと異なり、シャドーイングは脳と口の筋肉が同時にリアルタイムで英語を処理・再現することを強制します。研究により、発音精度、抑揚、リズム、連音、リスニング力、そして会話の流暢さが大幅に向上することが確認されています。IELTSスピーキング対策や自然な英語コミュニケーションを目指す方に特におすすめです。