Shadowing Practice: FINDING YOUR WAY (+ printable guide) ✨ - Learn English Speaking with Video

When we say that we're feeling lost in life, we're implying that there's a certain direction that we're supposed to be heading in, or a certain path that we should be following, and for whatever reason, we're not on that path.

Feeling lost in life is so part of the human experience, it's so common, that the psychologist Eric Erickson proposed that we might face up to eight different crises throughout our lifetimes.

Like think, for example, of the quarter-life crisis, or the mid-life crisis.

working through moments like these moments of uncertainty and confusion it's not easy and so today I wanted to share three different things that we can do in

order to try to find our way back onto the proverbial path again whenever we're feeling lost and warm things as well to better help for sponsoring today's video we're gonna chat more about them at the end

I personally think that it's a little bit of a myth that there is a single purpose for everyone somewhere out there in the world that we just have to

find i think it puts a lot of pressure on us to try to find this one thing that we love and it also doesn't give much

space for passions to come and go as they tend to so instead of seeking a singular purpose i think that we

can better derive guidance and direction from a set of personal values these are a collection of personal truths like for example valuing family spending time with them valuing adventure

valuing nature, the beauty of it, and preserving it, valuing caring for those in need, valuing learning and creating.

The psychiatrist Viktor Frankl once said that the meaning of life is to give life meaning.

And I always feel like being connected with our personal values can help us when we're trying to make decisions to make sure that we're making the right ones, but it also helps in giving our lives some kind of direction or some kind of meaning.

So to help you in defining your your own set of personal values, we've actually created a free downloadable PDF.

You can find the link for it in the description box below.

And in it, you're gonna find a list of 75 values.

If you're up for it, just give it a skim and circle or write down the three or five that resonate with you the most.

Whenever I feel like I'm lacking a sense of purpose, I usually find at least some comfort in knowing that I'm doing the best that I can whenever I'm staying close to my personal values.

It's really easy to get caught up in our everyday lives and in our never-ending list of to-dos.

And you might remember in a video of ours from a couple of years back, I had recommended trying to focus our attention on quadrant one of the Eisenhower decision matrix.

So in short, the matrix divides our to-do list along two axes, things that are urgent and things that are important.

And quadrant one is where items fall that are both urgent and important.

These are things like finishing deadlines or responding to emails.

But beware of the urgency trap.

Working on the items that are in quadrant one is great from a productivity perspective, but it's often at the expense of making time for working on the items that are in quadrant two.

The tasks that are in quadrant two are those that are less urgent but more important.

And so usually it's the tasks that are more meaningful and that spark joy.

So for me, this is where I slot tasks like making time to garden or planning our next holiday or video chatting more with family back home or learning how to paint.

These are things that I feel are important but because they aren't urgent i also often find that i don't make time for them and in

my own personal experience when i don't make time for the items that are in quadrant two that's when i tend to start feeling a

bit lost or maybe burnt out or unfulfilled so in the free pdf that we've attached below you can actually fill out the eisenhower matrix for

yourself and then just keep a close eye on what you're putting in quadrant two try to create space for at least one of these items and maybe just actively schedule it in your agenda.

I really feel that it's making time for the tasks that are in quadrant two that can really help to contribute to our lifelong goals and our values.

Very often in our lives, our wants and needs are in direct conflict with each other.

Like we want to explore and travel the world, but at the same time, we want to put down deep roots.

We want to start a family but we also want to be independent and free from responsibilities.

And sometimes it's the wanting of these very conflicting things that can make us feel like we don't know what we're doing.

And it can be really frustrating.

Like I remember I once called my mom a bit emotional that I was really missing family back home.

I wanted to be with them in Canada again.

With my parents and my sisters and their kids and I just missed them so much and I missed the familiarity of home but at the

same time I knew that I chose the life of living abroad in the Netherlands with Robin and I was so grateful for the life that

we were building for ourselves here but at the same time I felt like an outsider and so I was just completely torn and honestly I still am like do I stay or do I go back home and anytime I feel lost or anytime I feel like I'm being pulled in different directions directions.

It's the words of my mom that actually brings me a whole bunch of comfort because she often says you will have everything you've ever wanted in your life but just never all at the same time.

For me it means that it's okay to focus on just one thing at a time because very likely at some point in my life I will have that other thing

that I want instead but it will be at the expense of whatever it is that I have right now and so kind of feeling torn between these two very conflicting desires, it can feel very debilitating.

And especially if you're an anxious person like me and tend to overthink which of the decisions is the best one to follow.

And it's again my mom's words of wisdom that offer me some relief because she'll often say, shine just enough light to see only one step of the path ahead of you at a time.

And it's her way of reminding me that it's okay to not have all the answers right now.

Because when we try to do it all, it feels like we have a mountain to climb, where in fact all that matters today is that we put one foot in front of the other.

It's a reminder to take it just one step at a time and to focus on what's right in front of us.

And so kind of feeling lost, it's obviously not easy, but it also means that there's a shift happening, a pivotal moment of potential personal growth.

Henry David Thoreau once famously said, Not until we are lost do we begin to understand ourselves.

And so it might be worth it to work through these moments intently, but that's not to say that we have to do it all by ourselves.

So I again wanted to thank BetterHelp for sponsoring today's video in honor of Mental Health Awareness Month.

I think many of us face a mental health challenge at some point in our lives, whether that's feeling lost in life or overwhelmed, or as I've said for me, it's been living with anxiety.

And I think it's so important to talk about it just so that we realize like we're not alone but at the same time it's important to talk to somebody about it who you know can properly listen and help.

For me anyway therapy has been indispensable.

So BetterHelp is an online therapy platform where you can chat with your own therapist weekly via video or voice chat or through unlimited instant messaging.

Whatever you feel most comfortable with and wherever you feel most comfortable talking to them because it's all online and everything is of course confidential.

To start you just fill out a questionnaire to assess what your specific needs are and then within 48 hours you'll already be matched with a therapist.

They also offer financial support which you can apply for during the signup process and if for whatever reason you're just not clicking with the therapist that you've been matched with you can actually request a new one anytime and free of charge.

They've got over 20,000 therapists working with them with a broad range of expertise so someone else is bound to be a great fit.

In advocating for and making mental health care more accessible, BetterHelp is actually offering 10% off of your first month.

So if you or someone that you know could benefit from speaking to a licensed therapist, then check out betterhelp.com forward slash pick up lines or check out the link that I'll leave for you in the description box below.

If you've been feeling a little bit lost lately, I feel you.

I have been there before and it's just very uncomfortable and unpleasant, but it's temporary and a little bit of introspection can go a long way.

It's a great way to get started, especially when you write things out.

So if you'd like again that PDF that we've created for you with a few prompts to help offer some direction The link for that is in the description box below and thanks so much for hanging with me today I really appreciate it.

Thicka Blime's signing off and we'll see you in the next video

📺 Zelfde Kanaal

Shadowing Practice: FINDING YOUR WAY (+ printable guide) ✨ - Learn English Speaking with Video

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