Shadowing Practice: how to destroy someone’s ego without putting in any effort - Learn English Speaking with Video

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20 sentences
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If you want to destroy someone's ego without even lifting a finger, just don't react to whatever they do
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because they are trying to get external validation from you as a result of provoking you
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or upsetting you or manipulating you and if you react in any way shape or form,
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that is going to cause them to receive that external validation because they're thinking, oh yeah, you reacted because I'm worth something to you.
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You reacted because you care about me.
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Why would you care about me because I'm valuable.
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And as a result, it kind of strokes their ego in a strange way because they receive that external validation.
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When you do not react, they think to themselves, wait, why aren't you reacting?
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Why aren't you giving me that validation?
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Why?
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Am I not worthy?
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Do you not care about me?
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Am I not worth the effort?
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And to that, you can just think to yourself, well, yeah, you're not worth the effort.
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Because someone who is worth the effort wouldn't be trying to provoke you to get that validation.
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And if you want to destroy their ego, make them feel insignificant.
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Make them feel powerless.
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Don't allow them to get a reaction out of you.
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Of course, there are moments where you need to stand up for yourself, but in the case of someone who has an ego, the easiest way to destroy it is just by not reacting.
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So yeah, hope that helps.

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Vocabulary and speaking notes for this lesson

This video has 20 sentences and 247 words to shadow. The speech runs for 1:15. The speaker talks fast, about 197 words per minute, so expect linked and reduced sounds. 84% of the words are among the 3,000 most common in English; the rest is worth studying before you start.

Key vocabulary in this video

14 words from the video worth learning, with pronunciation and meaning:

WordPronunciationMeaning
react verb/ɹiːˈækt/To act in response.
validation noun/ˌvæl.əˈdeɪ.ʃən/The act of validating something.
finger noun/ˈfɪŋɡɚ/A slender jointed extremity of the human hand, (often) exclusive of the thumb, and the corresponding part, irrespective of including a thumb, in many other…
worthy adjective/ˈwɝ.ði/Having worth, merit, or value.
manipulate verb/məˈnɪp.jʊ.leɪt/To move, arrange or operate something using the hands
insignificant adjective/ˌɪnsɪɡˈnɪfɪkənt/Not significant; not important, inconsequential, or having no noticeable effect.
provoke verb/pɹəˈvəʊk/To cause someone to become annoyed or angry.
powerless adjective/ˈpaʊɚləs/Lacking sufficient power or strength.
destroy verb/dɪˈstɹɔɪ/To damage beyond use or repair; to damage (something) to the point that it effectively ceases to exist.
external adjective/ɪkˈstɜː.nəl/Outside of something; on the exterior.
strange adjective/stɹeɪnd͡ʒ/Not normal; odd, unusual, surprising, out of the ordinary, often with a negative connotation.
upset verb/ʌpˈsɛt/To make (a person) angry, distressed, or unhappy.
valuable adjective/ˈvælju(ə)bl̩/Having a great value.
lift noun/lɪft/An act of lifting or raising.

Phrasal verbs you will hear

WordMeaning
stand up for verbTo speak or act in support or defense of (a person, a cause, a belief, or the like).

Pronunciation to watch

The speaker uses 9 contractions and reduced forms, such as aren't, don't, I'm. Say them the short way, as you hear them.

  • Long words — get the stress right: validation /ˌvæl.əˈdeɪ.ʃən/, manipulate /məˈnɪp.jʊ.leɪt/, insignificant /ˌɪnsɪɡˈnɪfɪkənt/

How to practise with this video

  1. Listen to the whole video once without speaking and note the words you do not know.
  2. Start at 0.75× speed, shadow it sentence by sentence, then go back to normal speed once it feels easy.
  3. Record yourself and compare with the original, paying attention to words like react, validation, finger.

What is the Shadowing Technique?

Shadowing is a science-backed language learning technique originally developed for professional interpreter training and popularized by polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. The method is simple but powerful: you listen to native English audio and immediately repeat it out loud — like a shadow following the speaker with just a 1–2 second delay. Unlike passive listening or grammar drills, shadowing forces your brain and mouth muscles to simultaneously process and reproduce real speech patterns. Research shows it significantly improves pronunciation accuracy, intonation, rhythm, connected speech, listening comprehension, and speaking fluency — making it one of the most effective methods for IELTS Speaking preparation and real-world English communication.

Shadowing technique: read the full step-by-step guide →