Shadowing Practice: How to Enter Conversations (Even If You Have Nothing To Say!) - Learn English Speaking with Video

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As a communication coach, I always hear this exact problem from my students.

People are in the crowd.

I try to make eye contact and smile and try to inch closer, but I just speak out.

I couldn't really hold a proper conversation.

You have the desire to enter the conversation, but what's going on in your head that's stopping you?

And this doesn't just happen in professional settings.

It happens also in social environments too.

And if you can relate to my student and you struggle to one, enter conversations and two, know what to say and how to add value to the conversation,

then listen carefully because this will completely change your perspective on how to approach these situations even

if you don't necessarily know what to say.

So yesterday I have a mini practice with my girlfriends and I realized they just hop and I'm like a bystander.

I couldn't even move in to say something.

I'm trying to just wait for them to finish.

I think maybe I'm too polite or what.

The saddest part about this is some of the most kind, beautiful people end up being ignored because they're overly considerate.

I think there's way more people who feel the same way you feel, think the same way you think than you give yourself credit for.

Let's jam on this for a second, okay?

Because I think this is a very important skill.

The first part is they're talking about a topic that I don't know anything about.

So when you don't know anything about it, you assume I can't contribute to the conversation, which I believe is incorrect.

Because if you think

that contribution only comes in the form of me adding value based on my knowledge on that topic, that's incorrect.

You can add value based on knowledge, but you can also add value to the conversation by asking a question.

That is a of contribution to the conversation.

So if your friends are talking about a restaurant

and let's say they're talking about a beautiful restaurant that sells baku teh, my favorite.

For those of you who don't know what that is, you're missing out.

That's all I'm gonna say.

It's a beautiful dish in Malaysia.

And if they're talking about this baku teh restaurant, they're all going crazy about it and then you can still ask a question.

You say, hey, tell me, when did you find out about this restaurant?

How did you find out about this restaurant?

now that is a form of contribution because now they get to share, oh, I used to, my dad used to take it when I was young all the time and I loved it.

And then now they're talking about dad, right?

And you can go, oh, hey, that sounds like a really beautiful relationship you had with him.

And then they're, yes, I did.

Oh, you know what?

And then blah, blah, blah, they keep talking.

And now you can say, you know what?

My dad did the same thing.

But for my dad, it wasn't a restaurant.

You know, for me and my dad, it was about flying kites, right?

So I think you're, you're creating a cognitive block immediately thinking, if I don't know something on this topic they're all talking about, I can't join the conversation.

For everybody here, that needs to stop because you can still be a part of the conversation, use the question.

And that question immediately opens up another angle for that topic.

So use the question.

I think you'd be talking about quantum physics and Newtonian physics and you can jump in, but hey, what sparked your interest in this?

You know, like when did you discover your interest for this?

Oh, it started when I was in high school because of one of my teachers who really inspired me.

It's the only place, Vin, that I believe magic still exists.

It's the only place where, oh gosh, that's so beautiful.

I mean, tell me more about it and then you can still be a part of it.

So that's very powerful.

That's number one.

He's so clever, isn't he?

One of the smartest guys I know.

By the way, what you're watching right now is an exclusive Q&A that I run monthly for over 5,000 students

who are a part of my stage community.

That's where they get direct access

and be able to ask me anything they want to be able to go deeper on their communication skills.

And if you want direct access to me and have me as one of your communication teachers on your journey, I've put together a bundle I call the Odyssey Bundle.

I know how creative because of the Christopher Nolan movie that's just come out.

The first thing you get is lifetime access to the Stage Academy.

This is a structured communication skills program that I've developed over the last 15 years.

That's where you go to learn.

Number two, the second part of the bundle.

This is where you'll get six months access to the stage community.

This is where you go to practice and apply the things you've learned from the stage academy.

You go deeper with the skills.

So click the link below to begin your communication odyssey.

I'll see you on the inside.

Okay, back to the video.

The second one, I can already tell that you are being too polite, which is very sweet.

I think it's a very beautiful value.

But often with my students who are overly polite, because there's such being as being overly polite, too polite, that you end up being invisible and you don't get hurt.

When you think about how do I signal that I want to say something?

When you're being polite and overly polite, you mute yourself visually and vocally.

So there's no vocal signal that you want to join.

There's no visual signal that you want to join.

So people assume you don't want to join.

The only place that you know you want to join is in your brain.

But people can't see inside of your brain, right?

So they can't see your intentions.

So you need to start still being polite.

I don't want you to be a bad person, but I want you to raise the thought.

Just go, oh, share an auditory indicator and a visual indicator.

So while they're talking, and I've got friends who talk really intensely as well, you go, oh, and then the moment you do that, they'll look at you like i have to ask you both there's

so much love for this restaurant how many times have you been here

and you're already a part of it and and

and cheekily how come this is only the first time i'm coming along what's going on with

that and then you play you play right you play in conversation

so i think auditory indicators and visual indicators are very important

that you want to join otherwise people don't know the saddest

part about this is some of of the most kind beautiful people end up being ignored because they're overly considerate.

Whereas in a low stakes environment like a conversation, jump in Sharon, jump in.

And you have to do this slowly.

You know, in the next conversation, don't jump in 50 times, just jump in two or three times and make contributions, ask a question.

And the beautiful thing about asking questions is when you ask enough questions to other people around other considerate people,

they'll gradually fire one back to you and then that's your invitation to talk

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but unless you jump in and ask questions sometimes you'll just be completely outside of that circle

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so I think what question can I ask you what question

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can I ask you jump in with a question jump in with a contribution and share

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and I think you've got to create a bit of a

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I don't think I believe you should consider creating a bit of a KPI for yourself

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that every conversation every meeting that you're a part of from this point, you ask at least one question, you contribute at least one thing.

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That you are visible at least once.

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That you're never going to walk away from a lunch again not being visible at least once.

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And I dare say at least one to three times.

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Practice it.

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It's like a muscle.

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And just jump in.

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You have a beautiful energy to you.

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From the moment you ask me a question, don't let your fear rob the world of that.

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Jump in.

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Ask some questions.

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Share some stories.

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Speaking Goals for This Clip

This video targets a key fluency milestone: confidently entering conversations even when you feel unprepared or unfamiliar with the topic. It helps learners move past the "cognitive block" of thinking they need expert knowledge to contribute, focusing instead on building connection through curiosity and active listening. This skill is critical for both social and professional settings, where joining discussions smoothly can boost confidence and relationship-building.

Phrase Bank

"Tell me, when did you find out about this restaurant?"
"How did you find out about this restaurant?"
"That sounds like a really beautiful relationship you had with him."
"What sparked your interest in this?"
"When did you discover your interest for this?"

These phrases are reusable tools for joining conversations. They work because they encourage others to share stories, creating natural openings to connect with personal experiences.

Fix Your Weak Spots

Many English learners struggle with the rhythm of interrupting politely or asking questions smoothly. The video emphasizes that questions are contributions, which can ease the pressure to "have something smart to say." To practice, use the phrase bank and focus on intonation—rising tones at the end of questions signal curiosity, making your entry feel friendly, not intrusive. For those using shadowing techniques (like practicing with a shadowing site), repeat the questions from the dialogue to mimic the natural pace and stress. This helps build muscle memory for confident, conversational speech. Remember: even if you don’t know the topic, a well-timed question keeps the conversation flowing and makes you an active participant. Learning English with videos like this—by shadowing and practicing these phrases—can transform how you approach real-world interactions.

Grammar in this video

The structures the speaker uses most, with the exact words from the video:

Structure	In the video
Relative clauses who / which + clause — extra information about a person or thing	people who feel · teachers who really · polite, which is
Present perfect have/has + past participle — a past action that still matters now	I've put · I've developed · you've learned
Passive voice be + past participle — the focus is on what happens, not who does it	being ignored

What is the Shadowing Technique?

Shadowing is a science-backed language learning technique originally developed for professional interpreter training and popularized by polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. The method is simple but powerful: you listen to native English audio and immediately repeat it out loud — like a shadow following the speaker with just a 1–2 second delay. Unlike passive listening or grammar drills, shadowing forces your brain and mouth muscles to simultaneously process and reproduce real speech patterns. Research shows it significantly improves pronunciation accuracy, intonation, rhythm, connected speech, listening comprehension, and speaking fluency — making it one of the most effective methods for IELTS Speaking preparation and real-world English communication.

Shadowing technique: read the full step-by-step guide →

Shadowing Practice: How to Enter Conversations (Even If You Have Nothing To Say!) - Learn English Speaking with Video

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