Shadowing Practice: The Cringey Ones with Chandler | Friends - Learn English Speaking with Video

Creating lesson...
1
I'm just getting out of a very serious relationship.
2
I know!
3
And I'm just getting out of a marriage.
4
I mean, talk about meant to be.
5
Right.
6
But I just think this is happening too soon.
7
Oh, too soon, too shmoo-n.
8
Makes it, honey.
9
I am not letting you get away this time.
10
I hear ya.
11
Hm.
12
But, unfortunately, my company is transferring me overseas.
13
Oh, no. Where to? To Paris?
14
No. No, not Paris.
15
Oh, to London?
16
No, Rome?
17
Vienna?
18
Oh, Barcelona?
19
Okay, could you just stop talking for a second?
20
Yemen.
21
That's right, yes.
22
I'm being transferred to Yemen. When?
23
I don't know exactly.
24
Oh, well, I will just have to soak up every ounce of Chandler Bing until that moment comes.
25
But I do know it's sometime tomorrow.
26
You know, uh, you really didn't have to help me Oh, well, when you said all you were gonna be doing between now and the time you leave is packing,
27
you really didn't leave me much choice, did you?
28
Well, I thought I did, but I guess I did not.
29
Hey, what's going on?
30
Oh, I'm packing.
31
You know, I'm packing because I'm moving to Yemen tomorrow.
32
Thanks for telling me.
33
I'm going to pretend moving to Yemen, okay?
34
It's the only way I can get rid of her.
35
Oh, good one.
36
And Yemen, that actually sounds like a real country.
37
Hey, Chandler, come on.
38
I'm gonna show you how to roll up your underwear and stuff it in your shoes.
39
It's a real space saver.
40
Yeah, no, I do that, because it makes me look taller.
41
Okay, Chandler, come on.
42
Okay.
43
Joey, trade lives with me.
44
Nope.
45
You know, you really didn't have to take me to the airport.
46
Oh, please.
47
Every moment is precious.
48
You know, besides, somebody had to ride in that other taxi with the rest of your luggage, and your friends don't seem to care very much that you're leaving.
49
Well, we're not really that close.
50
Okay, so I guess this is, uh, you know, goodbye then.
51
Oh, no, no, it's not goodbye.
52
I'm not leaving until you get on that plane.
53
Okay, well, I guess just wait here, then.
54
Hi.
55
I need a fake ticket to Yemen.
56
One ticket to Yemen?
57
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no. I just need a pretend ticket.
58
I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand.
59
Look, what would you give to a kid if you wanted a ticket to play with?
60
Are you traveling with a child?
61
No. You know what?
62
She's gonna think that I'm handing you a credit card.
63
But what I'm really gonna do is hand you a library card.
64
Uh, sir, a ticket to Yemen is $2,100, and we don't take library cards.
65
What's the matter?
66
Is something wrong?
67
Do you have to stay?
68
American Express?
69
6-4 to Yemen.
70
Well, I guess I gotta go.
71
Oh, my bingling.
72
I'll wait for you.
73
Do you even know how long you're gonna be gone?
74
Well, just until we find an energy source to replace fuel.
75
Oh.
76
Well, I'll write you every day.
77
Fifteen, Yemen Road, Yemen.
78
Okay.
79
Goodbye.
80
Goodbye.
81
Goodbye.
82
Chandler?
83
Nope.
84
Chandler!
85
Janice, there you are.
86
There you are.
87
I had to have one last kiss and also, also you said you were gonna leave right after I got on the plane.
88
No, no. I want to see you take off.
89
Well, then I guess I'm going to Yemen.
90
I'm going to Yemen.
91
When we get to Yemen, can I stay with you?
92
Wow, I don't know what to say.
93
Well, what do you say?
94
I don't know.
95
It's a bracelet.
96
Isn't it?
97
And it's a grave, too.
98
Check it out. To my best bud.
99
Thanks, best bud.
100
Put it on.
101
Oh, now?
102
No, no, I think something this nice should be saved for a special occasion.
103
Oh, no, no, that's the beauty part.
104
It goes with everything.
105
You put this on, you're good to go.
106
Oh, man.
107
You are so wearing that bracelet.
108
I so am.
109
What do you want to do?
110
Let's do something crazy.
111
I know.
112
Let's rest and drink lots of fluids.
113
Okay, I'll rest.
114
But, you know, if I'm going to bed, that you're coming with me.
115
That would be impossible to resist if you weren't all...
116
drippy here.
117
Are you saying that you don't want to get with this?
118
Yeah, I don't think you should say that even when you're healthy.
119
Oh, come on.
120
No, I'll tell you better.
121
Don't take this personally, okay?
122
It's just that I just can't have sex with a sick person.
123
I'm with you, Chandler.
124
I mean, I can't have sex with a sick person either, and it's disgusting.
125
But I'm not sick.
126
Let me prove it to you.
127
We are two healthy people.
128
And the bribe of lime.
129
See, that's the thing.
130
I would like to stay in the bribe of lime.
131
Bye.
132
Hey, I hear that you and Joshua are going out to dinner with Ross and Emily, and I think that's...
133
I think that's really cool.
134
Yeah, Rachel, I think you're handling that really well.
135
Handling it?
136
What do you mean handling it?
137
There's nothing to handle.
138
You know, maybe I would have a problem with this if it wasn't for me and Joshua.
139
You know, they're not gonna get married anyway.
140
What?
141
Come on.
142
They rushed into this thing so fast, it's ridiculous.
143
I mean, they're gonna be engaged for, like, what, a year?
144
And somewhere along the way, one of them is gonna realize what they've done, and they're gonna call the whole thing off.
145
I'm telling you, you're gonna be dancing at my wedding before you're dancing at theirs.
146
Yeah, well, I don't dance at weddings.
147
Why not?
148
Because weddings are a great place to meet women.
149
And when I dance, I look like this.
150
Hey, man.
151
Hey.
152
And it's all dressed up for the big office party.
153
Hey, by the way, what are we celebrating?
154
Oh, we had a lot of liquor left over from the Christmas party.
155
I think this is so cool.
156
I mean, none of our friends are here, so we can, you know, be a real couple.
157
We don't have to hide.
158
I know.
159
I can do this.
160
Oh.
161
And I can do this.
162
We can't do that.
163
We can't do that.
164
No. Hey, bing!
165
Whoa!
166
Who's the pretty lady, and what the hell's she doing with you?
167
I asked myself that very question, sir.
168
This is Monica.
169
This is my boss, Doug.
170
Hi, I'm Doug.
171
This is Monica.
172
Hi, nice to meet you.
173
Hi, and this is my wife, Cara.
174
Nice to meet you, Monica.
175
Bing!
176
Okay.
177
Hey, Bing, did you hear about the new law firm we got working for us?
178
No, sir.
179
Yeah, Dewey, Cheatham and Howell.
180
Come on, honey, let's go drink our body weight, huh?
181
What was that?
182
What?
183
That noise you just made.
184
Oh, that was my work laugh.
185
Your work laugh?
186
Oh, can't believe me gonna survive this party you're gonna have
187
to come up with one too all right check me out okay says 30 father same as in town
188
hey everybody at work loved you last night really and they like me more just because i was with you
189
i think you repaired a lot of the damage from when they met joey
190
And Doug wants us to play tennis with him.
191
He's never even talked to me outside of work.
192
Except for that time when we bumped into each other at that strip club.
193
Strip church.
194
Anyway, I'm gonna go try to find a racket.
195
Hey, I thought you already had one.
196
Oh, I used to, but then Joey thought it'd be fun to go to Central Park and hit rocks at...
197
bigger rocks.
198
Hey, please, do you have a tennis racket?
199
Oh, um, you know, I lent it to Joey, and I've never actually gotten it back.
200
Okay, good luck with that.
201
I can't believe you let them win.
202
Yeah, at least you hid your feelings well about it.
203
I was frustrated.
204
It was my racket.
205
I was frustrated with you.
206
If Haddon lost the game, they would never have invited us to dinner tomorrow night.
207
You know what really bothers me?
208
It's how different you act around them.
209
I mean, you know, the throwing the tennis games, the fake laugh, the see you later, bing.
210
Not if I see you first, Doug.
211
Ah, ah, ah!
212
I gotta tell you, I don't like work, Chandler, okay?
213
The guy's a suck-up.
214
Okay, you know what?
215
Because you said that?
216
I'm not putting out tonight.
217
But seriously, I strongly believe that we should all support President Clinton and her husband, Bill.
218
Nah!
219
So, how do you kids like your coffee?
220
Oh, none for me, thanks.
221
Ah, just a little bit of sugar.
222
Well, maybe I'll bring it out and have Monica stick her finger in it.
223
That ought to sweeten it up, huh?
224
How does that laugh not give you a headache?
225
Oh, you get used to it.
226
Yeah, I don't think that I can so
227
if you don't mind maybe this will be it for me on the work things.
228
So I laugh at my boss's jokes.
229
What's the big deal?
230
I'd rather not hang out with a sniveling work weasel guy
231
when when I could be hanging out with my boyfriend if I actually respect.
232
Oh.
233
Uh, I gotta apologize for Kara's coffee, you know?
234
I feel sorry for it if it ever got in a fight.
235
It's not strong enough to defend itself.
236
See what I said, Bing?
237
What?
238
It's a joke, Bing.
239
What's the matter with you?
240
Well, I-I just didn't think it was funny, sir.
241
Excuse me?
242
Well, I-I just...
243
I just...
244
Honey, I just don't think that you understood the joke.
245
Really?
246
Yeah, I mean, it was really funny.
247
I just don't think that you got it.
248
You see, Kara's coffee is weak-tasting.
249
Okay, but what Doug did was implied that it was weak physically.
250
You get it now, honey?
251
I think I do.
252
Thank you, Monica.
253
I thought you could use help.
254
Coffee in a fight.
255
Someone in there?
256
No. This is just part of a daredevil game
257
that I play called Wait until the last moment before I burst and die.
258
Jeez, man, did you fall high? So, uh, did you?
259
Did you fall high?
260
Someone was in the ladies' room.
261
I couldn't wait.
262
I left the lid up for you, though.
263
You know what, uh, go, uh, go ahead.
264
I'm talking to, uh...
265
This is the part where you'd say your name.
266
Ginger.
267
Ginger.
268
I'm talking to Ginger, so...
269
Don't you have to use the bathroom?
270
Nope.
271
Nope.
272
I just, uh, I'd rather, uh, talk to you.
273
Yes, I do.
274
Yes, I do have to go to the bathroom.
275
Someone in here.
276
Thank you so much for seeing us.
277
Phoebe has told us such great things about you guys.
278
Oh, please, we're happy to help.
279
We went through the same thing when we were adopting.
280
So, a lot of malfunctioning wee-wees and hoo-hoos in this room, huh?
281
I mean, you have a lovely home.
282
Well, we appreciate anything you can tell us.
283
Well, actually, I think this might help.
284
It's pretty much all the information you need.
285
Oh, my God.
286
Everything is broken down into categories and then cross-referenced and then color-coded to correspond with the forms in the back.
287
Thank you.
288
I think I just had a tiny orgasm.
289
I know the process is frustrating, but it's so worth it.
290
adopting Owen was the best thing
291
that ever happened to us that's great can I see the
292
book you want me to wash my hands first don't you it's just so pretty
293
and wait bathroom is down the hall to your left I
294
would have told him to do it too can I adopt
295
you hey you must be Owen yeah I'm Chandler hey I was in the I was a new scouts, too.
296
You were?
297
Yeah, in fact, my father was a den mother.
298
Huh?
299
You know how to use a compass?
300
I have a badge in it.
301
You do?
302
That's fantastic.
303
You wanna see it?
304
I'd love to, but I gotta get back to talking to your parents.
305
They're telling us all about how they adopted you.
306
What?
307
What?
308
I'm adopted?
309
I got nothing.
310
What are you doing, Colleen?
311
They're in the kitchen getting us something to eat.
312
Can you believe how nice they are?
313
We have to leave.
314
Why?
315
What did you do in the bathroom?
316
I didn't get to the bathroom.
317
I bumped into Owen on the way, and he didn't know he was adopted.
318
And there's a slight chance I may have told him.
319
Oh, my God, where's my purse?
320
No, you know what?
321
I can replace everything in there.
322
Get that binder and let's go!
323
Some little snacks for everybody.
324
Oh, you don't have to eat the sour worms.
325
Those are for Owen.
326
I'll go get him in a second.
327
Uh, by the way, you should know, we haven't told him he's adopted yet.
328
But kids are so intuitive.
329
Don't you think on some level he already knows?
330
I'm adopted?
331
See?
332
Intuitive.
333
What?
334
Where did you hear that?
335
He told me.
336
And he paid me $50 not to tell.
337
Which technically now you should give back.
338
You told him he's adopted?
339
I'm so sorry, but you should have a sign out there or something, or at least whisper it to people when they come in the door.
340
Owen doesn't know he's adopted, and he also thinks Santa is real.
341
He isn't?
342
We have to get out of here, baby.
343
We just want to give you a heads-up.
344
Bill and Colleen hate us.
345
Owen didn't know he was adopted, and Monica told him.
346
What?
347
Still, he had to find out sometime.
348
Yeah, but how would you like it if someone told the triplets that you gave birth to them?
349
I'm gonna go tell Emma she was an accident.
350
This is so exciting, so glamorous.
351
People taking our picture.
352
How do I look?
353
A little tall.
354
What?
355
Would you mind crouching down a little bit so that I look taller?
356
There you go.
357
Good job, Joe.
358
Well done.
359
Top-notch.
360
You liked it?
361
You really liked it?
362
Oh, yeah.
363
Which part exactly?
364
The whole thing.
365
Here we go.
366
No, no, no. Give me some specifics.
367
I love the specifics.
368
The specifics were the best part.
369
Hey, what about the scene with the kangaroo?
370
Did you like that part?
371
I was surprised to see a kangaroo in a World War I epic.
372
You fell asleep.
373
There was no kangaroo.
374
They didn't take any of my suggestions.
375
Thanks a lot for coming, buddy.
376
See you later.
377
Don't go.
378
I'm sorry.
379
I'm so sorry.
380
Look, this guy fell asleep.
381
He fell asleep, too.
382
Be mad at him. Or call an ambulance.
383
Hey, Rach, funny story.
384
I bumped into Joanna on the street yesterday.
385
My boss, Joanna?
386
Wow, that must have been awkward.
387
Well, no, actually, she asked me if I wanted to get a drink.
388
You, uh, didn't say yes to that, did you?
389
No. No. Oh.
390
Hello, Rachel.
391
Well, not at first.
392
What is she doing here?
393
I don't understand.
394
Last time you went out with her, you said she was a big doll dud.
395
Well, I think I judged her too quickly.
396
And this time, we were able to take the relationship to the next level.
397
Well, last time, I almost got fired.
398
You must end it.
399
You must end it now.
400
Oh, come on.
401
It's not like this is an everyday occurrence for me.
402
I mean, usually I'm pretty much just in there by myself.
403
Hi.
404
What?
405
Rachel, could I see you for a moment? Does it hurt?
406
No, I just always see guys doing this when they get handcuffs taken off.
407
Hello, sweet pigs!
408
Wait a minute!
409
What are you gonna tell Joanna?
410
How about what?
411
When she sees that you're gone, she's gonna know that I let you out and that I was in here and I'm gonna get fired.
412
I'll make something up.
413
I'm good at lying.
414
I actually did borrow your Walkman.
415
No, there's nothing to make up.
416
She's gonna know that I have a key to her office.
417
I've gotta get you locked back the way you were.
418
Oh, I don't think so.
419
No, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no. No, no,
420
no. No, no. No. No. Well, this is much better.
421
Mayraps, give me the one!
422
Oh, God, would you just calm down?
423
Oh!
424
Oh!
425
I'm gonna say this for the last time. Would you please just...
426
Buy and wrap all of your Christmas gifts!
427
No!
428
Oh, I, uh...
429
Oh, I'll squeeze you fresh orange juice every morning!
430
With extra pulp?
431
Yeah!
432
No!
433
No!
434
I've got it.
435
You don't have it.
436
I've so got it!
437
There's gonna be rumors about this.
438
There's no way to stop it.
439
Sophie knows.
440
Monica and Phoebe know.
441
How do Monica and Phoebe know?
442
Oh, I called them.
443
And when they asked me what I saw, I can be very generous... or very stingy.
444
Go on.
445
I can make you a legend.
446
I can make you this generation's Milton Berle. And Milton Berle has...
447
Oh, not compared to you.
448
Hello.
449
Hey.
450
Hello, Chandler.
451
I love you.
452
Hey, what's going on?
453
Oh.
454
No, he doesn't.
455
Two hours that lasted.
456
Okay, now, remember, no trading.
457
You get the pretty one, I get the mess.
458
Hi, Joey.
459
Hey.
460
Well, well.
461
Look what you brought.
462
Very nice.
463
And what did you bring?
464
She's checking her coat.
465
Joey, I'm gonna go wash the cab smell off my hands.
466
Will you get me a white Zinfanzel and a glass of red for Janice?
467
Janice?
468
Janice?
469
Oh.
470
My.
471
God.
472
Hey, it's Brenna.
473
You know, ever since I was little, I've been able to pick up quarters with my toes.
474
Yeah?
475
Good for you.
476
Uh, quarters or rolls of quarters?
477
By the way, Chandler, I cut you out of all my pictures, so if you want, I have a bag with just your heads.
478
That's okay.
479
Oh, are you sure?
480
Really?
481
Because, you know, you could make little puppets out of them and you could use them in your theater of cruelty.
482
We can't do that.
483
What?
484
What can't you do?
485
Uh, can I talk to you for a second?
486
Over there.
487
Uh, we might be leaving now.
488
Tell me it's you and me, we.
489
She said she wants to slab them my body with stuff and then lick it off.
490
I'm not even sure what slathering is.
491
But I definitely want to be a part of it.
492
Okay, you cannot do this to me.
493
You're right.
494
I'm sorry.
495
You're right.
496
Can we have three chocolate mousses to go, please?
497
I'm out of here.
498
Here's my credit card.
499
Dinner's on me.
500
I'm sorry, Chandler.
501
I hope she throws up on you.
502
Thanks. So?
503
Just us.
504
Oh, what a crappy night.
505
Although, I have enjoyed the fact
506
that your shirt's been sticking out of your zipper ever since you came back from the bathroom.
507
Excuse me.
508
How you doing?
509
Oh, I miss you already.
510
Can you believe this happened?
511
No, no. Yeah, it did.
512
Goodbye, Janice.
513
Kiss me.
514
Oh, Chandler, sorry.
515
Oh, Chandler, sorry.
516
Hey, Janice, I'm Monica.
517
Okay, well, this was very special.
518
Rach, you gotta see who's out here!
519
What's going on?
520
Oh my God!
521
Janice!
522
Hi!
523
Janice is gonna go away now.
524
I'll be right back.
525
Oh!
526
Joey, look who it is!
527
Whoa.
528
Oh good, Joey's home now.
529
This is so much fun!
530
This is like a reunion in the hall.
531
Oh, hi, Ross.
532
Yeah, there's someone I want you to say hi to.
533
He just happened to go.
534
Hello, Ross.
535
Yes, that's right.
536
It's me.
537
How did you know?
538
Hey.
539
What's the matter?
540
Somebody on the subway licked my neck.
541
Licked my neck!
542
Oh, Willie's still alive.
543
What are you guys doing?
544
Oh, my mom called.
545
They're gonna run our engagement announcement in the local paper, so we're looking for a good picture of us.
546
Ooh, I'm afraid that does not exist.
547
That's not true.
548
They're great pictures of us.
549
No, they're great pictures of you standing next to a guy who's going like this.
550
Oh, my God, that's the creep that you're with at the Statue of Liberty.
551
I don't know what it is.
552
I just can't take a good picture.
553
Oh, here's a great one.
554
Yeah, I'm not in that.
555
No, but look at me all tan.
556
Hey, why don't you guys go get portraits done by a professional photographer?
557
It's a great idea.
558
I bet they have one of those wind machines, you know, like...
559
Yeah, that's great.
560
Next to that, Chandler won't look so stupid.
561
Chandler, what do you say?
562
All right, but I should warn you, I'm not going.
563
I'm going.
564
Great.
565
That's great, Monica.
566
Great.
567
Now Chandler you want to give us a smile okay
568
I'm sorry is the seat uncomfortable no I am I know you can do this you have a beautiful smile All right,
569
maybe you don't have to smile let's try something else let's try um try looking sexy,
570
okay Or not.
571
I know.
572
Let's try a look of far-off wonderment.
573
Okay, we'll gaze into our future, and we'll think about our marriage and the days to come.
574
Chandler, what is the matter with your face?
575
Wait, this picture's supposed to say Geller and Bing to be married, not local woman saves drowning moron.
576
Hey, don't laugh at him.
577
He's my drowning moron.
578
That's it, that's it.
579
Take it, take it.
580
I like this one.
581
It seems to say, I love you and that's why I have to kill you.
582
It can't all be bad.
583
Find the one where you make your bedroom eyes.
584
Oh, there it is.
585
Oh, my God, those are my bedroom eyes?
586
Why did you ever sleep with me?
587
Do you really want to pull at that thread?
588
Sweet.
589
That's a great smile.
590
Easy, natural.
591
Now pretend I have a camera.
592
You're changing it.
593
I can't help it.
594
All right, all right, all right, all right.
595
You want to know what I do when I take resume shots?
596
Foul money from me.
597
Yeah.
598
Okay.
599
First of all, you want to make it look spontaneous, right?
600
Okay, so here's what I do.
601
I look down, look down, keep looking down, then I look up.
602
See?
603
All right, now you try.
604
Look down, be looking down, keep looking down.
605
Why is there jelly on your shoe?
606
I had a donut.
607
Hey, there you are.
608
There I am.
609
You okay?
610
Yeah, Joey said I, uh, I needed to relax, so he gave me an antihistamine.
611
What?
612
Yeah, and then I fell asleep on the subway and went all the way to Brooklyn.
613
Brooklyn is far.
614
Yeah, Taylor, what were you thinking?
615
No, no, but don't worry, don't worry, because I know how to take a picture now.
616
Okay, see?
617
Look down.
618
Look down.
619
Look down.
620
Chandler?
621
Yeah!
622
Guys, check it out.
623
My mom slipped me the paper.
624
Oh, that's a gig.
625
Hey.
626
Oh, yeah, that looks good.
627
You guys make a very attractive couple.
628
Yeah, we look great together.
629
We really do.
630
Okay.
631
Wow, imagine what our kids would look like.
632
You know, we don't have to imagine.
633
I'm marrying her.
634
Well, just see.
635
Mmm.
636
What took you so long?
637
I got caught up at work, but I'm quitting tomorrow.
638
Ah.
639
So thanks for having me over.
640
Rach.
641
Peebs.
642
See ya.
643
What the hell was that?
644
Probably some, you know, European goodbye thing you picked up in London.
645
I...
646
That's not European.
647
It felt French.
648
Good morning, everybody.
649
Can I get you a cup of coffee, sir?
650
Oh, no, no, no. I'm an intern, just like you guys.
651
except for the tie, the briefcase, and the fact that I can rent a car.
652
Seriously?
653
You're an intern?
654
Yeah, well, I'm kind of heading in a new career direction, and, you know, you gotta start at the bottom.
655
Dude.
656
All right, look, I know I'm a little bit older than you guys, but it's not like I'm Bob Hope.
657
The comedian?
658
USO.
659
Uh, it's USA, sir.
660
Hey, how's it going?
661
I'm doing okay.
662
I think it's going well.
663
Do you think they're having fun?
664
Am I talking too fast?
665
Nope.
666
Sound like me.
667
It's going great.
668
Look at Chandler with little baby girl Chandler.
669
Little baby girl Chandler.
670
Where have I heard that before?
671
Oh, right.
672
Coach Rubin.
673
You know what, Pheebs?
674
When you're done over there, we've got a kind of situation over here, too.
675
Nuh-uh.
676
No, we are all responsible for our own babies.
677
See, that's where I think that you're wrong.
678
We have been playing these babies man-to-man.
679
We should really be playing a zone defense.
680
What do you mean?
681
I just think things will go a lot smoother if we each have our own zone, you know?
682
Phoebe, you can be in charge of wiping.
683
And, you know, Ma, you can be in charge of diapering.
684
And I can be in charge of looking at your kids when they put their hands around them.
685
Boop, boop, boop, boop.
686
That sounds really great, but maybe you should be in charge of wiping.
687
Okay, I'm a rookie.
688
I should not be in the end zone.
689
Tyler, what are you doing?
690
That thing could put someone's eye out.
691
He can do more than that.
692
He can destroy the universe.
693
Well, Jim, if they could swallow one of those little parts, and also look at his smooth area.
694
That's just gonna mess them up.
695
All right.
696
I thought about it, and maybe you're right.
697
Maybe Krog is not a safe toy.
698
Good.
699
What made you change your mind?
700
I swallowed a sonic blaster gun.
701
How did that happen?
702
Well, I was trying to prove that I was right, you know, and turns out I was wrong, and now it's lodged in my throat.
703
These are asleep.
704
I'm sure you'll be okay on your own for a while.
705
But you can't leave me with them.
706
We're a team.
707
We're playing the zone.
708
They're gonna triple team me.
709
He's got something plastic lodged into his throat.
710
We've got to go to the hospital.
711
But no, because a doctor won't be able to help him, and it's just gonna, you know, naturally pass through his system in like seven years.
712
I think that's gum.
713
I'm pretty sure it's gun.
714
So I totally took care of the babies all by myself.
715
I fed them, bathed them, and put them to bed.
716
And protected them from a tornado?
717
Oh, my God.
718
I know.
719
The babies are asleep.
720
What happened here?
721
I did it.
722
I took care of the babies all by myself.
723
My apartment was the setting of Phoebe's triumph. But the mess...
724
It's not as important as the fact that Phoebe took care of the babies all by herself.
725
You're right.
726
You're right.
727
I shouldn't freak out.
728
Because this is what it's going to be like when you and I have babies.
729
When will that be?
730
Phoebe, would you take a look at this mess?
731
What have you been up to?
732
Oh, you know, the usual.. teaching aerobics, partying way too much.
733
Oh, and in case you were wondering, those are my legs on the new James Bond poster.
734
Can you hold on a moment?
735
I have another call.
736
I love her.
737
I know.
738
I'm back.
739
So, are we gonna get together or what?
740
Uh, absolutely.
741
Uh, how about tomorrow afternoon?
742
Do you know, uh, Central Perk in the village, say, 5-ish?
743
Great.
744
I'll see you then.
745
Okay.
746
Okay.
747
Having a phone has finally paid off.
748
Okay, even though you do do a good Bob impression, I'm thinking when she sees you tomorrow, she's probably gonna realize, hey, you're not Bob.
749
I am hoping that when Bob doesn't show up, she will seek comfort in the open arms of the wry stranger at the next table.
750
Oh, my God.
751
You are pure evil.
752
Okay, pure evil.
753
Horny and alone.
754
I've done this.
755
Still doing the screening thing?
756
I had sex today.
757
I never have to answer that phone again.
758
Dr. B, you know what to do.
759
Hey, Bob, it's Jade.
760
Listen, I just wanted to tell you that I was really hurt when you didn't show up the other day.
761
And just so you know, I ended up meeting a guy.
762
Bob here.
763
Oh, hi.
764
So, uh, you met someone, huh?
765
Yes.
766
Yes, I did.
767
In fact, I had sex with him two hours ago.
768
So, uh, how was he?
769
Eh.
770
Eh?
771
Oh, Bob, he was nothing compared to you.
772
I had to bite my lip to keep from screaming your name.
773
Well, that makes me feel so good.
774
It was just so awkward and bumpy.
775
Well, maybe he had some kind of new cool style that you're not familiar with.
776
And maybe you have to get used to it.
777
Well, there really wasn't much time to get used to it, if you know what I mean.
778
It'll be great.
779
You just make her think you want to have sex with her, and it'll totally figure out.
780
Okay, listen, how far am I going to have to go with her?
781
Relax.
782
She's going to give in way before you do.
783
How do you know?
784
Because you're on my team, and my team always wins. At this?
785
Just go get some.
786
Come on, go.
787
Okay, honey, I'm going to try to listen from right here.
788
Okay.
789
Okay.
790
Oh, wait.
791
Good idea.
792
Yeah.
793
Oh, wait.
794
Don't give away the farm.
795
Okay.
796
Phoebe.
797
Chandler.
798
Come on in.
799
I was going to.
800
Um, I brought some wine.
801
Would you like some?
802
Sure. So here we are.
803
Nervous?
804
Me?
805
No. You?
806
No. I want this to happen. So do I.
807
Oh, you're going?
808
Not without you, lover.
809
So, this is my bra.
810
It's very, very nice.
811
Well, come here.
812
I'm very happy we're gonna have all the sex.
813
You should be.
814
I'm very bendy.
815
I'm gonna kiss you now.
816
What if I kiss you first?
817
Well, I guess there's nothing left for us to do but...but kiss.
818
Here it comes.
819
Our first kiss?
820
Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.
821
You win.
822
I can't have sex with you.
823
And why not?
824
Because I'm in love with Monica.
825
You're.. you're what?
826
Love her!
827
That's right.
828
I love her.
829
I love her.
830
I love you, Monica.
831
I love you, too, Chandler.
832
I thought you guys were doing it.
833
I didn't know you were in love.
834
Dude.
835
And hats off to Phoebe.
836
Quite a competitor.
837
And may I say your breasts are still sharp.
838
God.
839
You know what, I gotta tell you, I love your mom's books.
840
I love her books.
841
I cannot get on a plane without one.
842
I mean, this is so cool.
843
Yeah, well, you wouldn't think it's cool if you're 11 years old
844
and all your friends are passing around page 79 of Mistress Bitch.
845
Hey, hey, hey, she's on.
846
Ah, Nora Bing.
847
If we get to the board, now, what is this about you, you being arrested in London?
848
What is that all about?
849
Your mom was arrested?
850
Shh, busy beaming with pride.
851
This is kind of embarrassing, but occasionally after I've been intimate with the man...
852
Now why would she say that's embarrassing?
853
I just get this craving for Kung Pao Chicken.
854
That's too much information!
855
So now you're doing this whole book tour thing.
856
How is that going?
857
Oh, fine.
858
I'm leaving for New York tomorrow, which I hate.
859
But I get to see my son, who I love.
860
Aww.
861
If this is the way that I find out, most moms use the phone.
862
You know, don't take this wrong.
863
I just don't see you as a mom somehow.
864
I don't mean that bad.
865
Oh, no, I am a fabulous mom.
866
I bought my son his first condoms.
867
And then he burst into flames.
868
This is gonna happen on anniversary ever.
869
Oh, good.
870
All right, you decided to tell about the Richard thing.
871
What Richard thing?
872
Oh, no. What Richard thing?
873
Simmons.
874
Go Simmons.
875
Okay, I ran into Richard yesterday, and he asked me if I wanted to go for a bite, and I did.
876
And the only reason why I didn't tell you is
877
because I knew you'd get mad and I didn't want to spoil our anniversary.
878
I'm not mad.
879
Really?
880
Oh, yeah.
881
Yeah, so you bumped into Richard.
882
You grabbed a bite.
883
Don't be a deal.
884
Great.
885
Okay, London won.
886
Eric, what kind of photography do you do?
887
Oh, mostly fashion.
888
So there may be models here from time to time.
889
I hope that's cool.
890
Yes, that is cool.
891
Because I have models here, you know...
892
Never.
893
What else?
894
Oh, yeah.
895
During the summer, I spend most weekends at my sister's beach house, which you are welcome to use, by the way.
896
Although I should probably tell you she's a porn star.
897
Well, listen, I, uh, still have one more person to, uh, meet, but unless it turns out to be your sister, I think your chances are pretty good.
898
All right. Who are you?
899
Hi, I'm Eric.
900
I'm going to be Chandler's new roommate.
901
I'm Chandler's new roommate.
902
I don't think so.
903
I could be Chandler's new roommate.
904
But he told me over the phone.
905
He told me in person.
906
That's weird.
907
Well, I'm going to, uh, going to my new apartment now.
908
Hey.
909
Hey, how was it?
910
Well I had a great time.
911
Chauncey on the other hand, I will tell the story.
912
It was going great.
913
I let him win.
914
We were bonding.
915
He even said that I could call him dad.
916
And what did he ask you not to call him?
917
Daddy.
918
All right, look, here's the story.
919
Well, we had just finished playing racquetball, and we were gonna take a steam.
920
I walk into the steam room, and it's really steamy.
921
So I take off my glasses, and that's when it happened.
922
Guys?
923
Over here.
924
Have a seat, son.
925
Hey!
926
Hey!
927
Oh, my God, Chandler.
928
I can't believe it.
929
I know.
930
You gave my father a lap dance.
931
Why did they put
932
so much steam in there? in there otherwise they'd have to
933
call it the room room why okay why why did
934
that have to happen it's not that big a deal not
935
that big a deal there there was touching of things I know you wanted to bond with my dad
936
but did you really have to bond to that part Listen, I'm sure that Dad doesn't care.
937
He probably thought this was really funny.
938
He'll be telling this story for years.
939
I don't want him to tell this story for years.
940
Oh, but he will.
941
He still tells the story about how Monica tried to escape from fat camp.
942
I wasn't escaping.
943
Then how'd you get caught in the barbed wire?
944
I was trying to help out a squirrel.
945
You were trying to eat it.
946
If that is your father calling to tell this story, then the marriage is off.
947
Come on.
948
Hello?
949
I'm sorry, you have the wrong number.
950
Okay, I'll call you later, Dad.
951
I love you.
952
All right, I'm off to see your dad.
953
Whoa, whoa.
954
Aren't you a little overdressed?
955
Yeah, and you better make sure he tips you this time.
956
Look, I figured I would try to convince him not to tell the story anymore, and I figured the best way to do that was face to face.
957
And by face, I don't mean his lap.
958
And by face, I don't mean my ass.
959
So you understand, I'd feel a lot more comfortable if you didn't tell people what happened.
960
You know, I'm a little...
961
I'm a little embarrassed about it.
962
I understand completely there's nothing more horrifying than embarrassing yourself in front of your in-laws.
963
As a matter of fact, when I started dating Judy, I was unemployed.
964
And her father asked me what I did for a living and I told him I was a lawyer.
965
What did you do when they found out?
966
They never did.
967
So if you ever see me giving them legal advice, just nod along. Shall we?
968
So, I guess we wear swimsuits in here.
969
Chandler Bing.
970
Hi, honey.
971
We're all here.
972
We just want to wish you a Merry Christmas.
973
Merry Christmas!
974
Merry Christmas!
975
Blark!
976
Aw, Merry Christmas.
977
I miss you guys.
978
So is it horrible?
979
Is everybody working really hard?
980
Uh, well, no. It's just, uh, me and Wendy.
981
Wendy, that sounds like a girl's name.
982
It is.
983
Did I not tell you about her?
984
Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
985
About the time you told me about New Year's Eve.
986
Where's everybody else?
987
I sent them home.
988
Oh, you are such a good boss.
989
Is she pretty?
990
Uh, uh, answer faster, answer faster.
991
I don't know.
992
Answer better, answer better.
993
I don't think of her that way, you know?
994
I mean, she's a, uh, she's a colleague.
995
What does she do there?
996
Oh, she's regional vice president.
997
She's just below me.
998
She did what?
999
Below me.
1000
Uh, wait, is Wendy the runner-up Miss Oklahoma?
1001
What?
1002
Well, she didn't win.
1003
All right, well, maybe I should let you and the second prettiest girl in Oklahoma get back to work.
1004
Well, second prettiest that year.
1005
I mean, of all the girls in Oklahoma, she's probably...
1006
Oh, Chandler, stop talking.
1007
Honey, there's really nothing to worry about.
1008
Okay.
1009
I'm serious.
1010
Okay.
1011
Merry Christmas.
1012
Merry Christmas.
1013
Merry Christmas, you guys.
1014
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
1015
The wife says hi.
1016
Ah, fun conversation.
1017
Oh, well, she's just got this weird idea that, uh, you know, just because you and I are alone, something's gonna happen.
1018
Huh?
1019
Really?
1020
Hm.
1021
That.. be so terrible?
1022
This is probably the wrong thing to be worrying about, but you're getting ham on my only tie.
1023
Nothing.
1024
This is the 9 millionth ring store we've been to, and I can't find the perfect ring.
1025
Ugly ring, ugly ring, ugly ring.
1026
It's a beautiful selection.
1027
Okay, so maybe you don't get her a ring.
1028
Maybe you, maybe you do something different, you know?
1029
Maybe you get her an engagement bracelet, you know?
1030
Or an engagement tiara.
1031
Oh, an engagement revolutionary warm musket!
1032
You know, I'm so glad I picked you to help me with this this.
1033
Huh?
1034
Can you just imagine getting down on one knee and handing her this gorgeous piece of weaponry?
1035
Yeah, I'm gonna stick with the ring.
1036
Could she be more out of my league?
1037
Ross, back me up here.
1038
You can never get a woman like that in a million years.
1039
Thank you, buddy.
1040
Oh, oh, but you know, you always see these really beautiful women with these really nothing guys.
1041
You could be one of those guys.
1042
You could do that.
1043
You think?
1044
Yeah, absolutely.
1045
Oh, God, I can't believe I'm even considering this.
1046
I'm very, very aware of my tongue.
1047
Come on, come on.
1048
Here goes.
1049
Yes?
1050
Hi.
1051
Um, okay, next word would be, uh, Chandler.
1052
Chandler is my name and, uh, hi.
1053
Yes, you said that.
1054
Yes.
1055
Yes, I did.
1056
But what I didn't say was what I was about to say.
1057
What I wanted to say was, uh, would you like to go out with me sometime?
1058
Thank you.
1059
Good night.
1060
Hey, you guys.
1061
Oh, hey.
1062
Hi.
1063
Hey, listen.
1064
Let me ask you.
1065
Do you believe in soulmates?
1066
Oh, yes, I do.
1067
I do.
1068
I believe that there is one perfect person out there for everyone.
1069
And you know how you find him?
1070
You stop looking for him.
1071
That's why I've stopped looking for Russell Crowe.
1072
He'll find me.
1073
Uh-huh.
1074
Uh-huh. And you? And you?
1075
No. I mean, I believe that certain people are more suited for each other, and I believe in falling in love, but soulmates, I don't think they exist.
1076
Okay, good.
1077
Why?
1078
Well, last night I met Monica's.
1079
What?
1080
Yeah, I had a date with this guy, and I swear to God he is her other half.
1081
Come on, don't be crazy.
1082
You don't think there's somebody out there better suited for Monica than me, do you? But what's he like?
1083
Well, he's tall.
1084
Uh-huh.
1085
He has brown hair.
1086
Of course, of course.
1087
A tall guy with hair similar to mine.
1088
Oh, a noble universe.
1089
He works with food.
1090
Oh, sure.
1091
Older?
1092
Obviously.
1093
And he's British.
1094
Oh, I was just gonna ask!
1095
Yeah?
1096
And he's so centered and mature and confident.
1097
Oh, it's so sad.
1098
They never had a chance to meet.
1099
Luckily, the guy she settled for can't hear what you're talking about.
1100
Oh, I'm so sorry.
1101
And maybe I'm wrong.
1102
But you know what?
1103
I'm going to go out with him again.
1104
I'll find out more.
1105
You believe that this guy is destined for somebody else and you're still going to date him?
1106
Well, he may not be my soulmate, but a girl's got to eat.
1107
Oh.
1108
Hi.
1109
Hi.
1110
Um, Chandler, Monica, this is Don.
1111
Oh, hello.
1112
Hello.
1113
Nice to meet you.
1114
How are you?
1115
Tell me.
1116
So, what have you guys been doing?
1117
Well, we just had a terrible lunch at Adriatico.
1118
What is with all the sun-dried tomatoes at that place?
1119
I know!
1120
What is this, 1985?
1121
That's exactly what I said.
1122
Phoebe, isn't that strange?
1123
Not really.
1124
What's wrong with sun-dried tomatoes?
1125
On a barbecued chicken pizza?
1126
No?
1127
So, Don, what other restaurants do you like?
1128
Well, Octavio, 27 and 7.
1129
Oh, there's this great little place, Alessandro's.
1130
Oh, my God.
1131
That's my restaurant.
1132
I'm the chef there.
1133
You're kidding me.
1134
Your food is fantastic.
1135
Wow, I really want to talk to you about your menu.
1136
I'm just gonna get some coffees first.
1137
You don't want anything.
1138
Oh, I'd like a latte.
1139
You know what?
1140
If you're gonna talk about me, I'm gonna go with you.
1141
What are you doing?
1142
Nothing.
1143
I swear to God, I didn't know you guys would be here.
1144
The good news is you don't even believe in soulmates, so...
1145
I believe in tall, handsome strangers who hit on my wife.
1146
They're just talking, and you know what, just because I think they're so amazed doesn't mean anything's gonna happen.
1147
Phoebe, good work.
1148
Yeah?
1149
Yeah, I'm just afraid I'd love him.
1150
Don't worry, we'll find you someone else.
1151
So I've been slowly phasing out the wine importing and focusing more on the cheese side of things.
1152
Cheese, you say?
1153
That's some pretty smelly work, huh, Don?
1154
Excuse me?
1155
Cheese.
1156
It's smelly.
1157
You must smell a lot of the time, too.
1158
Uh, not really.
1159
But when it comes to cheese, I'm one of those people who thinks the smellier the better.
1160
Me, too.
1161
Yeah, Chandler can't stand it.
1162
He won't even allow me to have blue cheese in the house.
1163
And you're still married to him?
1164
I'd like to have Don and Phoebe over.
1165
Wouldn't that be nice?
1166
Sure.
1167
Why don't you set it up?
1168
I'll just be over here browsing through the personals. Are you okay?
1169
You've been acting weird all afternoon.
1170
Yeah, fine.
1171
Fine.
1172
Not perfect, but good enough.
1173
Jeez, what is with you?
1174
I'm sorry.
1175
Did you say cheese?
1176
All right, what's going on?
1177
Phoebe thinks that you and Don are soulmates, and I don't believe in that kind of stuff, but then you two totally get along.
1178
So, look, I won't stand in your way
1179
if you want to run off with Don and live in a house of cheese.
1180
Taylor, you don't believe in soulmates?
1181
No, but I'm sure Tomatoes does.
1182
I don't believe in soulmates either.
1183
You don't?
1184
No. I don't think that you and I were destined to end up together.
1185
I think that we fell in love and we work hard at our relationship.
1186
Some days we work really hard.
1187
So you.. you don't want to live with Donna in the cheese house?
1188
No, I've had second thoughts about that.
1189
Do you realize how hard that would be to clean?
1190
I love you.
1191
I know.
1192
You know what?
1193
I'm gonna take you out to dinner tonight.
1194
I found this place that makes the greatest mozzarella sticks and jalapeno poppers.
1195
No?
1196
Really?
1197
They taste so good.
1198
You know what?
1199
But there is no right or wrong here.
1200
No, I think it's very obvious who's wrong here.
1201
Obviously not to Joey.
1202
What? Do you know anything?
1203
You know, you're doing this like silly little puppy dog.
1204
Guess where I am!
1205
Hey, hey, hey!
1206
Hey!
1207
Hey!
1208
Hey!
1209
Hey!
1210
Look what you're doing to Chandler!
1211
What?
1212
What are you doing?
1213
Do you know what just happened?
1214
Hey!
1215
Hey!
1216
Hey!
1217
Hey!
1218
Hey!
1219
Hey!
1220
Hey!
1221
Look what you're doing to Chandler!
1222
What?
1223
What are you doing?
1224
Do you know what just happened?
1225
Yeah, we we had sex and then we fell asleep No,
1226
we were in the middle of sex and you fell asleep No, that's not true.
1227
No best time ever You rock my world Monica.
1228
What?
1229
I was giving you some of my best moves, and you missed it.
1230
So please wake up so we can do it right.
1231
Okay, okay, I'm ready.
1232
Come on, MacMilla.
1233
Give me the good stuff.
1234
Yeah.
1235
No, no, no, don't fall asleep.
1236
Okay, I'm going to make you some coffee.
1237
I probably won't spill coffee grounds all over the kitchen floor.
1238
Okay, I'm up, I'm up.

Vocabulary and speaking notes for this lesson

This B1 speaking lesson is built on the video “The Cringey Ones with Chandler”. This video has 1238 sentences and 7624 words to shadow. The speech runs for 59:42. The speaker talks at a steady 128 words per minute, a comfortable pace for shadowing. 83% of the words are among the 3,000 most common in English; the rest is worth studying before you start. 272 of its 1238 sentences are questions, so it is good practice for question intonation and short answers.

Key vocabulary in this video

The 15 most advanced words in the video, with pronunciation and meaning:

WordPronunciationMeaning
bing noun/bɪŋ/A slag heap, i.e. a man-made mound or heap formed with the waste material (slag) as a by-product of coal mining or the shale oil industry.
goodbye/ɡʊdˈbaɪ/Farewell; a formula used to another person or persons when the speaker, writer, or person addressed is departing.
soulmate nounSomeone, especially a romantic partner, with whom one is exceptionally or uniquely compatible or has a special, almost spiritual connection.
nope/noʊp/No.
boop noun/buːp/A low-pitched beeping sound.
whoa/woʊ/Stop (especially when commanding a horse or imitative thereof); calm down; slow down.
bump noun/bʌmp/A light blow or jolting collision.
engagement noun/ɪnˈɡeɪd͡ʒ.mənt/An appointment, especially to speak or perform.
embarrass verb/ɪmˈbæɹəs/To disrupt someone's composure or comfort with acting publicly or freely.
frustrate verb/ˈfɹʌsˌtɹeɪt/To disappoint or defeat; to vex by depriving of something expected or desired.
racket noun/ˈɹækɪt/A loud noise.
kangaroo noun/ˌkæŋ.ɡəˈɹu/A member of the Macropodidae family of large marsupials with strong hind legs for hopping, native to Australia and New Guinea.
bracelet noun/ˈbɹeɪslət/A band or chain worn around the wrist as jewelry/jewellery or an ornament.
roommate noun/ˈɹu(m)ˌmeɪt/A person with whom one shares a room, as in a dormitory, barracks, rooming house, or apartment.
tomato noun/təˈmeɪ.toʊ/A widely cultivated plant, Solanum lycopersicum, having edible fruit.

Phrasal verbs you will hear

WordMeaning
look down verbTo lower one's eyes; to direct one's look downwards.
find out verbTo discover, as by asking or investigating.
get out of verbTo leave, exit or escape from; to become free of.
end up verbTo bring to a conclusion.
get back to verbReturn to (an activity)
show up verbTo appear, arrive, or attend, especially suddenly or erratically.
take off verbTo remove.
calm down verbTo become less excited, intense, or angry.

Sentences worth repeating

Short, complete lines from the video that you can reuse in everyday conversation:

  • What's the matter with you?
  • Don't you have to use the bathroom?
  • Don't you think on some level he already knows?
  • You told him he's adopted?
  • You, uh, didn't say yes to that, did you?

Grammar in this video

The structures the speaker uses most, with the exact words from the video:

StructureIn the video
Present perfect continuous have/has been + -ing — an action that started earlier and is still going onhave been playing · You've been acting
Conditional sentences if + clause, will/would + verb — a condition and its resultIf Haddon lost the game, they would never · if you don't mind maybe this will be
Present perfect have/has + past participle — a past action that still matters nowthey've done · I've never actually gotten · have invited
Passive voice be + past participle — the focus is on what happens, not who does itbeing transferred · should be saved · be engaged

Pronunciation to watch

The speaker uses 362 contractions and reduced forms, such as I'm, don't, gonna. Say them the short way, as you hear them.

  • The “th” sounds: throat /ˈθɹoʊt/, theirs /ðɛɚz/
  • The “sh” and “zh” sounds: revolutionary /ˌɹɛvəˈluʃənɛɹi/, suggestion /səˈd͡ʒɛst.ʃən/, chef /ʃɛf/, shoe /ˈʃu/
  • Long words — get the stress right: intuitive /ɪnˈtjuːɪtɪv/, comedian /kəˈmiː.di.ən/, technically /ˈtɛk.nɪˌkəl.i/, apologize /əˈpɑləˌd͡ʒaɪz/, revolutionary /ˌɹɛvəˈluʃənɛɹi/

How to practise with this video

  1. Listen to the whole video once without speaking and note the words you do not know.
  2. Shadow it sentence by sentence at normal speed, repeating each one until your rhythm matches the speaker.
  3. Record yourself and compare with the original, paying attention to words like bing, goodbye, soulmate.

What is the Shadowing Technique?

Shadowing is a science-backed language learning technique originally developed for professional interpreter training and popularized by polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. The method is simple but powerful: you listen to native English audio and immediately repeat it out loud — like a shadow following the speaker with just a 1–2 second delay. Unlike passive listening or grammar drills, shadowing forces your brain and mouth muscles to simultaneously process and reproduce real speech patterns. Research shows it significantly improves pronunciation accuracy, intonation, rhythm, connected speech, listening comprehension, and speaking fluency — making it one of the most effective methods for IELTS Speaking preparation and real-world English communication.

Shadowing technique: read the full step-by-step guide →