ฝึกพูดภาษาอังกฤษด้วยเทคนิค Shadowing จากวิดีโอ: The Secret to Great Public Speaking (No, It's Not Confidence) | Jess Ekstrom | TEDxSugar Creek Women

As a kid, do you remember the absolute adrenaline rush of hearing the ice cream truck?

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As a kid, do you remember the absolute adrenaline rush of hearing the ice cream truck?

I lived at the top of my neighborhood,

so I took it as my civic duty to hop on my bike and alert the rest of the kids.

Looking back on this experience,

did I care how I looked,

frantically knocking on people's doors during dinnertime, drenched in sweat?

No. Did I care how I sounded shrieking,

the ice cream truck is coming,

smash your piggy banks, grab your flavors?

No. Why didn't I care?

Because I knew I had critical information.

that they wanted to know.

So public speaking wasn't about me.

It was the information I had that I knew could serve them.

With AI on the rise,

to say lightly, public speaking and human-to-human connection is becoming increasingly important.

Sure, you can go on ChatGPT to help craft an email to your boss asking for a raise.

But what about when she calls you into her office to discuss.

You can't interrupt her mid-sentence and go to AI and be like, Line?

Public speaking is becoming increasingly more important,

whether it is giving a presentation to your peers,

talking to your spouse, or working up the courage to call your favorite restaurant for takeout because they're not on Uber Eats.

Public speaking is the fuse that brings us all together.

It's also the gateway to opportunity.

The first step in a multi-million dollar deal,

or a partner saying yes to a proposal

or landing your dream opportunity was someone out there who knew how to deliver what they wanted to say

so why do people fear public speaking more than they fear sharks spiders and heights

or as Jerry Seinfeld says most people would rather be in the casket than giving the eulogy at the funeral

because public speaking is one of the most vulnerable exposed human experiences.

Personally, I blame school spelling bees or performances where we felt like we couldn't miss a letter,

that we had to deliver every line perfectly.

But the standard of perfection puts our nerves into a pressure cooker.

And so we've been told to combat our nerves,

especially as women, to just speak up.

Stand tall.

Or my favorite one, take up space.

But what this kind of advice does is it shifts the attention back onto ourselves,

which is ineffective.

Great speakers believe they are delivering great information,

whether it is about an ice cream truck or about something that'll increase your lifespan.

But the other thing that we get wrong is we believe that in order to be a great public speaker,

you have to be the center of attention.

You have to be the loudest one in the room with the most boisterous personality,

or you have to have the super dramatic story about how you single-handedly saved a species on the verge of extinction,

or how you climbed Mount Everest blindfolded.

So it makes us believe that inherently extroverts are great speakers and introverts aren't.

But I deeply identify as an introvert.

And here I am standing on this stage talking to you.

So let me tell you my experience.

I've made a career out of public speaking,

both speaking at companies and conferences all over the world,

or teaching it to women through my company.

But like anything you eventually become decent at,

you have to flop before you can fly.

And boy, did I flop.

Because you see, I thought that public speaking was about convincing people that you deserved to be there,

that you deserved to be worthy of their attention.

And so anytime I would get in front of people,

I would just like fire hose my resume or accolades

or press or name drop someone that I was in the room with for like more than two seconds.

Because that's what I thought that public speaking was was about showing them that I was important.

And as you might guess, it wasn't landing.

And so what did I do?

I started to study other speakers.

And I was like, why am I seeing speakers lose their train of thought on stage

or stumble over a word and still get standing ovations?

Or why did I trip going up to the stage for the whole audience to see my Spanx?

And I still had women wanting to talk to me afterwards.

Because being relatable doesn't make you unreliable.

It makes you a great speaker that is wired for connection.

The pressure to be impressive creates fear within ourselves,

lack of authenticity in our delivery,

and drives a wedge between the speaker and the listener.

I mean, let's be honest,

we've all been sitting across the table from someone who is 45 minutes into their monologue,

hasn't asked us a single question yet,

our coffee is empty,

and we are knee deep into hearing every detail of the story about how they actually had the idea for Uber first.

If only their college roommate didn't steal their whiteboard, you know.

Public speaking isn't about showing that you're important.

It's about proving to your audience or your listener that they are important.

Which brings me to my secret.

If you want to be a great public speaker, ask yourself one question.

Where are you shining your light?

I have determined there are two types of public speakers.

You have a spotlight speaker and you have a lighthouse speaker.

A spotlight speaker, the light is shining on you.

You are concerned with public perception.

You are asking yourselves, how do I look?

How do I sound?

Does everyone like me?

And it's not your fault because that's what we've been conditioned to believe that public speaking is,

being in the spotlight.

But a lighthouse speaker shifts the light from themselves to their listener.

If a spotlight asks, what does everyone think of me?

Then a lighthouse asks, what does everyone need of me?

When you're a lighthouse speaker,

not only you're going to be more impactful,

100

you're not going to get as nervous because it's not about achieving perfection,

101

it's about helping someone arrive at a solution.

102

We would all rather be guided by a lighthouse than a spotlight,

103

which proves that likability as a speaker doesn't come from being perfect.

104

It doesn't come from projecting some sort of forced confidence.

105

It comes from when you have a clear understanding of what your listener needs

106

and a rooted belief in what you know that can help.

107

So, if you want to be a great public speaker,

108

before you speak, ask yourself one question.

109

Where are you shining your light?

110

Thank you.

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ฝึกพูดภาษาอังกฤษด้วยเทคนิค Shadowing จากวิดีโอ: The Secret to Great Public Speaking (No, It's Not Confidence) | Jess Ekstrom | TEDxSugar Creek Women

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