Shadowing Practice: Mark Manson: Self-control is a complete illusion - Learn English Speaking with Video
בחר מצב תרגול
כל מצב פותח חדר תרגול במסך מלא.
141 משפטים
אם המשפטים קצרים או ארוכים מדי, לחץ על ערוך כדי להתאים אותם.
1
My name is Mark Manson.
2
I'm the author of The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck, as well as some other works.
3
I'm a YouTuber, podcaster, and my work focuses primarily on the importance of values.
4
Developing a healthy sense of hope.
5
So there's something I call the uncomfortable truth of life, and it's not fun to hear or think about.
6
And that is basically that you and everyone you know are going to die
7
and that basically nothing we do is going to matter in the grand scheme of things.
8
That in the infinite expanse of the universe,
9
we're just insignificant microscopic dust milling about and none of this matters.
10
And while that sounds very dark and fatalistic, I do think there is an optimistic view of that.
11
And that we get to create and construct meaning for ourselves.
12
We get to decide what matters in our lives and they sustain us through hardship and challenges and when things go wrong,
13
our hope keeps us getting up in the morning and moving forward.
14
But there's a dangerous side of hope as well, which most people don't think about.
15
And that is that we defend our hopes often violently.
16
that we cling to our hope because it sustains us so much emotionally.
17
And so if we hope for the wrong things, or if we hope for things that are unrealistic,
18
we can end up painting ourselves into a corner where living a fulfilling life is simply impossible.
19
So I break our hopes down into three component parts.
20
And these component parts are largely based on self-determination theory, which is the predominant framework for understanding motivation and psychology.
21
So the first one is, do you have a sense of autonomy?
22
Do you feel like you control your future?
23
Do you feel like you're able to make decisions for yourself?
24
The second component is, do you have something that you feel like is more important than yourself?
25
Is there something in your life that you're willing to struggle for or sacrifice for?
26
And then the third is, do you feel like you belong to something?
27
Do you feel like you have a tribe of people around you who share your values
28
or support your values as you pursue them?
29
And if you have all three of those things, then you can develop a healthy sense of hope.
30
But as we'll see, each one of those three things gets very complicated.
31
So the first complication comes around autonomy and self-control.
32
And that is essentially that self-control is an illusion.
33
What psychology shows us is that we are fundamentally irrational actors.
34
We are very emotionally driven, and then we rationalize our emotional decisions after the fact.
35
And so a lot of what we think about in terms of self-discipline,
36
habits, goal-setting, self-control, these are largely dictated by our emotional impulses.
37
And so paradoxically, the way to develop more control
38
and discipline in your life is not to implement rigid structures and just brute force everything with willpower.
39
It's actually to develop a better relationship with your own emotions.
40
because once you get in touch with your emotional impulses, you can start directing them in more productive directions.
41
Plato characterized it as a chariot and a horse.
42
And the rational thinking part of ourselves is the chariot with the whip
43
and the reins trying to control the horses of our instincts
44
and making sure that we go where we actually want to go.
45
So imagine that we have two brains.
46
We have the thinking brain and the feeling brain.
47
And imagine that our consciousness is a car.
48
Most of us assume that the thinking brain is driving the car
49
and the feeling brain is in the passenger seat being this kind of noisy child, you know, screaming, looking at stuff out the window,
50
getting excited or upset about various things.
51
But the truth is, is that it's actually the opposite.
52
The feeling brain is driving the car
53
and the thinking brain is sitting in the passenger your seat and trying to act as the navigator.
54
So the job of the thinking brain is to effectively communicate
55
to the feeling brain to kind of almost like a dog tame the feeling brain into going where it should go.
56
Because if you don't, then the feeling brain is just going to drive over the median into oncoming traffic,
57
follow whatever shiny object that it wants to chase after.
58
And so this struggle and tension between our thoughts and emotions is ever present.
59
And really what it boils down to is developing a healthier relationship with ourselves,
60
an understanding of our emotions without suppressing them,
61
a comfort experiencing various emotions without overindulging them,
62
and learning how to direct some of our impulses and cravings without overdoing them.
63
In my book, Everything is Fucked, a book about hope, I write a full chapter about Isaac Newton as kind of an allegory of understanding how our emotions
64
and our identity interact with each other.
65
In that story, I create Newton's three laws of emotion.
66
The first one is that for every action, there will be an equal and opposite emotional reaction.
67
So every action that we take in our life or every experience that we have in our life, whatever its impact on our identity,
68
how we identify ourselves, there will be an emotional reaction that is proportional
69
to how we perceive that experience to interact with our identity.
70
So let's say I have a large identity as an author and I run into somebody on the street who says like, wow, you're a terrible hand model.
71
Well, I don't identify as a hand model.
72
It's not a core part of how I see myself.
73
So I'll probably just kind of laugh and be like, wow, that's really weird.
74
But if I run into somebody on the street who like stops me and says, oh, wow, I read your books.
75
You're a terrible author.
76
Since that's such a core part of my identity, I will probably have a proportional emotional response to that experience.
77
And I'll probably get very upset, embarrassed, confused, angry, whatever it is.
78
But the emotional response will be directly proportional to how much the action is taking effect on my identity.
79
Newton's second law of emotion is that your identity is the sum of all of your emotional experiences throughout your life.
80
So if you have consistently felt bad around yourself, you will start to develop an identity of somebody who is bad.
81
Somebody who's just fails at things, is incapable of doing things.
82
Nobody's ever going to like you and so on.
83
Whereas if you experience a large sum of positive experiences through your life, you'll develop an identity around those positive experiences.
84
And ultimately this is why we adopt certain identities.
85
I adopt an identity as an author because I have intense positive experiences trying to be an author.
86
I've adopted an identity as bad at cooking
87
because I have pretty much nothing but negative experiences every time I try to cook.
88
And in Newton's third law is that there's an inertia to your identity,
89
that your identity will continue to be your identity until some force acts against it and redirects it.
90
And so when you're trying to change who you are or try to change your understanding of yourself, the only way you can actually do that is to go have contrary experiences.
91
Go out into the world and do things that act against the identity that prove your self-definition wrong in some way.
92
Now, the lesson to take in all of this is that ultimately you want to identify with things that are beyond yourself.
93
As long as your emotional stability is based on how you perceive yourself and others perceive you,
94
it's going to fluctuate wildly and you're going to lose control of your own actions.
95
But if you have something outside of yourself that you identify with, that you really give yourself to,
96
then that grants you a certain amount of stability in your life because it's no longer about you, right?
97
It's like if you give your life to raising a family,
98
then you no longer care if people criticize you for being a bad author or a bad cook.
99
It doesn't matter to you.
100
There's this more important thing outside of yourself
101
that you can tether your hopes to that provides more emotional stability and a greater amount of self-control.
102
And finally, the third complication comes around community.
103
So when we find something outside of ourselves, we develop like an emotional gravity in that we attract people with similar values as our own,
104
and we repel people with opposite values of our own.
105
So when you start to value something outside of yourself, you will naturally start to coalesce with other people around similar shared values.
106
And eventually you develop a community.
107
Now, communities are amazing.
108
They're great.
109
They're absolutely fundamental to our mental health.
110
We're very much wired as social creatures.
111
Our relationships are probably the highest correlated thing to our happiness and well-being out of everything that we've ever measured in psychology.
112
So developing a community around shared values is amazing.
113
It's incredible.
114
The problem is, is that humans have a tendency to not just create a benign community and celebrate something.
115
Once they've got the community, they like to play politics.
116
They like to start thinking, you know what?
117
Our little community is better than that community.
118
I think our community should have more access than that community.
119
I think our community should maybe be in charge of that community over there.
120
And this is where hope can turn dangerous,
121
because if your hopes hinge completely on your community having more access or power or resources over that community,
122
then your hope essentially hinges on gaining power and gaining control over others.
123
it starts to hinge on something that is by definition exclusionary and antagonistic to the rest of the world around it.
124
And I think an unintended side effect of the modern world,
125
by making it so accessible and possible for people to form communities around shared values,
126
we've unintentionally amplified the ability to create strife and conflict around each other's hopes.
127
All of these perspectives and ideas that I've been talking about, they're not fun.
128
They're not exciting, but they're good for you.
129
And they make you a better functioning human being.
130
So in this sense, I think of them like psychological vegetables.
131
Nobody likes eating vegetables, but we all know we need to eat our vegetables.
132
And vegetables are boring.
133
They're everywhere.
134
They're ever present.
135
They're in every meal, but they're always the least exciting part of the meal.
136
But the thing is, is that when we have a diet that's predominantly vegetables, we end up becoming healthier, we're more energized, we have more ability to focus,
137
we have more ability to act in the world.
138
It's ultimately what's good for us.
139
Whereas chasing the highs of happiness, believing that everybody should like you all the time, believing that you're special and you deserve special treatment,
140
these are like the sugar and desserts of our psychological diet.
141
they feel good for a brief moment, but they always come with a hangover, and they always make us deeply unhealthy in the long run.
הורד אפליקציה
כל מה שאתה צריך כדי לדבר בשטף
הגיית AIציון לכל משפט
תרגול IPAשלוט בכל צליל
אוצר מיליםבנה את מאגר המילים שלך
משחק אוצר מיליםלמד תוך כדי משחק
אותו ערוץ
C11
Your habits are quietly deciding who you become | Tal Ben-Shahar
Daily ConversationUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B21
You can progress more in 6 minutes than you would in a month | Daniel Coyle
Daily ConversationWorking Adults
C11
Semiconductors explained in 16 mins | Chris Miller
Daily ConversationUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
C13
The strange reason nobody views their own retaliation as evil | Paul Bloom
IELTS PrepTOEFL PrepUniversity Students
C111
The 3 ways stupidity spreads throughout a society | Jonny Thomson
IELTS PrepTOEFL PrepUniversity Students
B228
Your phone addiction is keeping you from achieving flow state | Arthur Brooks
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
C13
The paradox at the heart of AI and science | Terence Tao
IELTS PrepTOEFL PrepUniversity Students
C12
The one principal that all highly successful people share | Mark Manson
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B22
Physician: Listen to your body’s wisdom instead of constantly pushing to optimize it | Giulia Enders
Daily ConversationUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
C12
5 Stoic lessons to become your best self in 2026 | Massimo Pigliucci
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
C117
Why relationships in 2026 carry impossible expectations | Alain de Botton
Daily ConversationUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
C1The uncomfortable question you should ask on every first date | Alain de Botton
Daily ConversationUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
C1The science of stress, coping, and recovery, in 22 minutes | Lisa Damour
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
C1How to pull yourself out of a cheap dopamine spiral | Mark Manson
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
C1Mary Beard: Why no film has ever cracked The Odyssey
Cambridge Exam PrepUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
FOR YOU
המלץ על סרטון
C11
259 משפטים
Talk Back: Why Arguing With Yourself Can Help You Flourish
Daily ConversationUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
C11
140 משפטים
Stop Playing Small. Go All In.
Daily ConversationUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
C18
372 משפטים
Why I Work So Hard Even Though I’ve Already "Made It"
Daily ConversationUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
C11
364 משפטים
It's Boring, But These 5 Habits Will Change Your Life.
Daily ConversationUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B23
24 משפטים
Man's Search for Meaning: Finding Your Why
British AccentDaily ConversationUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
C15
116 משפטים
3 philosophy classics that are better than self-help books
British AccentDaily ConversationUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B28
32 משפטים
The Emptiness We All Feel I Robert Greene
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
C15
303 משפטים
Act As If Everything Always Works Out
Daily ConversationUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B29
36 משפטים
What Keeps Me OPTIMISTIC About the Future | Simon Sinek
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
C12
132 משפטים
Sam Harris basically breaks down the secret to life (again)
Daily ConversationUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
C12
273 משפטים
PNTV: Get Out of Your Mind & Into Your Life by Steven C. Hayes
Daily ConversationUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
אוצר מילים והערות הגייה לשיעור הזה
שיעור הדיבור הזה ברמה C1 מבוסס על הסרטון “Mark Manson: Self-control is a complete illusion”. המילים שחוזרות הכי הרבה: identity, emotional, brain, experience, value. בסרטון הזה יש 141 משפטים ו-1901 מילים לתרגול Shadowing. הדיבור נמשך 11:49. הדובר מדבר בקצב טבעי של כ-161 מילים בדקה, קרוב לשיחה יומיומית. 86% מהמילים נמצאות בין 3,000 המילים הנפוצות ביותר באנגלית; כדאי ללמוד את השאר לפני שמתחילים.
אוצר מילים מרכזי בסרטון הזה
15 המילים המתקדמות ביותר בסרטון, עם ההגייה והמשמעות שלהן:
| מילה | הגייה | משמעות |
|---|---|---|
| vegetable שם עצם | /ˈvɛd͡ʒ.tə.bəl/ | יֶרֶק |
| hinge שם עצם | /ˈhɪnd͡ʒ/ | ציר |
| chariot שם עצם | /ˈt͡ʃæɹi.ət/ | מֶרְכָּבָה |
| excite פועל | /ɪkˈsaɪt/ | הלהיב, עורר |
| autonomy שם עצם | /ɔˈtɑ.nə.mi/ | אוֹטוֹנוֹמְיָה |
| allegory שם עצם | /ˈæləˌɡɔɹi/ | מָשָׁל |
| coalesce פועל | /ˌkoʊ.əˈlɛs/ | התגבש, התאחד |
| navigator שם עצם | /ˈnavɪɡeɪtə/ | נַוָּט \ נווט |
| strife שם עצם | /stɹaɪf/ | מדון |
| hangover שם עצם | /ˈhæŋoʊ̯vɚ/ ~ /ˈhæŋɔʊ̯vɚ/ | חמרמורת, הנגאובר |
| craving שם עצם | /ˈkɹeɪ.vɪŋ/ | תַּאֲוָה, חֵשֶׁק |
| dictate פועל | /ˈdɪkˌteɪt/ | הכתיב |
| criticize פועל | /ˈkɹɪtɪsaɪz/ | ביקר |
| noisy שם תואר | /ˈnɔɪzi/ | רועש |
| rigid שם תואר | /ˈɹɪd͡ʒ.ɪd/ | נוקשה |
משפטים שכדאי לחזור עליהם
משפטים קצרים ושלמים מהסרטון שאפשר להשתמש בהם בשיחה יומיומית:
- Do you feel like you control your future?
- Do you feel like you're able to make decisions for yourself?
- Nobody's ever going to like you and so on.
- It doesn't matter to you.
- They like to start thinking, you know what?
דקדוק בסרטון הזה
המבנים שהדובר משתמש בהם הכי הרבה, עם המילים המדויקות מהסרטון:
| מבנה | בסרטון |
|---|---|
| הווה מושלם (Present perfect) have/has + past participle — פעולה שקרתה בעבר ועדיין יש לה חשיבות או השפעה עכשיו | I've adopted · we've ever measured |
| משפטי זיקה (Relative clauses) who / which + clause — מידע נוסף על אדם או דבר | theory, which is · somebody who is |
הגייה ששווה לשים לב אליה
הדובר משתמש ב-34 קיצורים וצורות מקוצרות, כמו they're, you're, don't. אמרו אותם בצורה הקצרה, כפי שאתם שומעים אותם.
- הצלילים של “th”: tether /ˈtɛðəɹ/, unhealthy /ʌnˈhɛl.θi/
- הצלילים של “sh” ו-“zh”: complication /ˌkɑm.pləˈkeɪ.ʃən/, emotionally /ɪˈməʊʃənəli/, inertia /ɪnˈɝ.ʃə/, rationalize /ˈɹæʃənəlaɪz/, irrational /ɪˈɹæʃ.(ə.)nəl/
- מילים ארוכות — שימו לב להטעמה: complication /ˌkɑm.pləˈkeɪ.ʃən/, autonomy /ɔˈtɑ.nə.mi/, emotionally /ɪˈməʊʃənəli/, allegory /ˈæləˌɡɔɹi/, antagonistic /ænˌtæɡ.əˈnɪs.tɪk/
צלילים שדוברי עברית מתקשים בהם:
- /w/ — שפתיים מעוגלות, לא /v/: willpower /ˈwɪlˌpaʊɚ/, wildly /ˈwaɪldli/, whip /ˈwɪp/
- /æ/ — פתוח יותר מה-“אֶ” העברית, לא כמו “a” ב-“cup”: chariot /ˈt͡ʃæɹi.ət/, interact /ɪn.təˈɹækt/, allegory /ˈæləˌɡɔɹi/, amplify /ˈæm.plə.faɪ/, antagonistic /ænˌtæɡ.əˈnɪs.tɪk/
- /r/ — הלשון לא נוגעת בשום מקום, לא ה-“ר” הגרונית: chariot /ˈt͡ʃæɹi.ət/, interact /ɪn.təˈɹækt/, allegory /ˈæləˌɡɔɹi/, characterize /ˈkɛɹəktəɹaɪz/, correlate /ˈkɔɹəleɪt/
איך לתרגל עם הסרטון הזה
- הקשיבו לכל הסרטון פעם אחת בלי לדבר, ורשמו את המילים שאתם לא מכירים.
- התחילו במהירות 0.75×, תרגלו Shadowing משפט אחר משפט, וחזרו למהירות רגילה כשזה מרגיש קל.
- הקליטו את עצמכם והשוו למקור, תוך תשומת לב למילים כמו vegetable, hinge, chariot.
מהי טכניקת השאדואינג?
שאדואינג היא טכניקת למידת שפה מבוססת מדע שפותחה במקור להכשרת מתורגמנים מקצועיים ופופולרית על ידי הפוליגלוט ד"ר אלכסנדר ארגואלס. השיטה פשוטה אך עוצמתית: אתה מקשיב לאודיו באנגלית ילידית וחוזר עליו בקול רם מיד — כמו צל העוקב אחרי הדובר עם עיכוב של 1–2 שניות בלבד. בניגוד להאזנה פסיבית או תרגילי דקדוק, שאדואינג מכריח את המוח והשרירים בפה לעבד ולשחזר דפוסי דיבור אמיתיים בו זמנית. מחקרים מראים שזה משפר משמעותית את דיוק ההגייה, האינטונציה, הקצב, הדיבור המחובר, הבנת השמיעה ושטף הדיבור — מה שהופך אותו לאחת השיטות היעילות ביותר להכנה לIELTS Speaking ולתקשורת באנגלית בעולם האמיתי.