Pratica di Shadowing: Life Lessons at 36 - Impara a parlare inglese con i video
Creazione lezione...
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I turned 36 a few weeks ago, and I entered this new era with a big splash.
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I celebrated it with the closest people in my life, and I had a blast.
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But before I got way too ahead of myself, I wanted to make sure that I sat down and I reflected
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as like a gift to myself and a reminder of how far I've come.
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So here are the core lessons that I would love to bring into my new year.
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The first lesson is to face everything you're avoiding
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because eventually it will get to a place where you can't ignore it it's no secret
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that i went through a few dark years after my divorce
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but like the biggest habit that happened was i was constantly delaying things
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and i just got comfortable with like minimizing the life tabs in my brain
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but the thing is like just
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because you ignore something doesn't mean it goes away i envision a digestive system each task
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that you do are things that you have to swallow right
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and if you don't execute them they can't pass so each task
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that you don't do you end up just becoming more indigested
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because it's compounding and finally you get to a place where you are just like spiritually constipated
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and that's how i felt i just felt
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so shitty all the time it got to a point on my 35th birthday
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and i was like i actually can't do this anymore
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so i sat down on my desk i wrote down a list of everything
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that i was running away from
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and then i got my calendar out i started assigning the tasks to a specific date
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and you know what's crazy the things
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that i was agonizing over for months i was able to just finish in a few days
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and the amount of relief
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that i felt oh my gosh it literally felt like i took like like a diarrhea pill
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or something the reality of the situation was
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so anticlimactic to what my dread had imagined it to be like i thought
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that i was trapped i thought that i was stuck i thought
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that this was impossible but that is the danger of procrastination it makes you feel
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that way because you're caught in this vicious cycle
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but the second you get specific with how you want to handle it
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and tackle it oh my gosh you're just like why did i do this sooner
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so my big lesson is if there is something
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that you can handle right now just do it and
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if it's something that you can't control then you have to release it i've been told many times
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that i am a busy bee
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and the rumors are unfortunately true i love being busy sue me
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but if i am so for real with myself i realized
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that i was using busyness as a coping mechanism
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when i traveled to korea with my parents for our annual
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trip suddenly i had huge stretches of time with no obligations
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like i didn't have to cook for anyone i didn't have anything to clean i didn't have any deadlines
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and you'd think
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that i would be soaring no it actually made me deeply
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uncomfortable like I caught myself like making this hyper detailed itinerary
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in Jeju until I realized like girl Jen just stop stop planning just exist
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so while I was sitting with my thoughts in Korea I realized
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that I have this tendency to yearn for what I don't have like just before the trip
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when I was in LA I was writing in my journal like oh I feel
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so stuck every day feels the same it's groundhog's day I can't wait to break free out of my routine
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and then the second I landed in korea i was like
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i'm homesick i miss lennon i miss cheeky i miss my
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bed i was really confronted with the truth of like
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if you can't be happy where you are right now you won't be happy anywhere
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because wherever you go there you are and then once i unlocked
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that thought i was like i gotta enjoy this right now i am with my parents my aunts
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and uncles who i haven't seen in such a long time
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and as beautiful as
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that trip was i had to be okay with it feeling bittersweet let's talk about venting
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because i for one love a good venting session it feels righteous it feels cathartic
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and i'm like a firm believer that
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when you bottle things up inside it's not good for you
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but i've realized that venting too much only cements the story it actually just wastes your anger
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because anger isn't necessarily a bad thing it's just like your
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internal bodyguard being like yo something's wrong a boundary's been crossed it's just looking out for you it's information
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and it's also fuel but when you just sit there
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and you vent about the same thing over
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and over again you are running through
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that fuel without actually solving anything it can become like a
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form of rumination where you're just kind of re -traumatizing yourself over
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and over again and
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if you're just saying the repetitive story then how else are
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you supposed to reframe your perspective my approach is very different today for minor inconveniences
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if i can fix the problem in the time
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that i've complained about it then i don't even say anything
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i don't even utter maybe i'll do like a big eye roll
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but i'll just handle it that's it
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and i just move on with my life now if it's something
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that is like genuinely weighing on me i'll whip up my journal i'll write it down i'll sleep on it
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and and then if I'm still like just fixated on it, I'll call a friend. Of course.
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A heads up is very important.
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Being like, hey, can I have 15 minutes to vent about something?
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And then I just move on with my life, usually.
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And then of course there is therapy.
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Either way, I've gotten to a point where I just don't let bad moments take permanent residency in my head anymore.
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I did another dry January this year and I like doing this habit.
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It's a good ritual.
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I feel like I start the year with like a clear baseline and I notice something about drinking.
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Drinking is a lot like gambling.
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In order to win, you have to know when to walk out of that table.
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But the trap is always identical.
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Like once you're having a good night, you get momentum.
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It's really hard to stop.
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Like for me, once I pass drink four, five, six, like I am donezo.
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No matter how much fun I was having, no matter what crazy stuff happened that night, if I am hungover, that is the only thing that I really remember.
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It completely swallows the whole experience.
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Once I hit my mid 30s, my body keeps a strict log.
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I simply cannot get away with what I used to.
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And I feel like I still haven't given up drinking entirely
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like I love a dry white with dinner I love a Hugo spritz, but I treat it like cashing out chips I'm learning to recognize
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when the night has hit its peak and when to cash out my chips For example, I went to a music festival last weekend Portola.
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Guess who left early?
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Alone It was the last day.
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I left at 8 p .m.
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Alone.
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Everyone was shocked.
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They're like, Jen, are you okay?
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And I'm like, yeah, I'm fine.
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I'm just, I just got to go home.
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And you have no idea how good it felt to have gotten my extroverted fix
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and listen to music and just be in bed.
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It truly has been a game changer.
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At this point in my life, the two qualities that I really look for in a friendship is trust and non -judgment.
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Don't get me wrong.
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I love a friend that's hilarious and intelligent and tells the best stories.
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But if I can't trust you, you're just not going to enter my close circle trust to me is feeling safe around
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that person i feel like confident
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that you will accept me as i am i've also learned
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that being a better friend means talking a little less especially
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when your other friends are going through something just like some thoughtful questions before you want to just like come
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and like shove advice me
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and my friends do a really good job taking turns like being containers for one another
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if someone needs to vent or express themselves
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or kind of like walk through like an issue they're going
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through like a lot of times I feel like I'm a giant jar where I hold them I ask questions
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and at that very very end I'll put in my two cents
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but you have to do it with the expectation
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that they're not gonna change you know just
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because you said like you should do this it's
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so simple you can't expect them to change like they're gonna change
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when they want to obviously there are exceptions to this
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if your friend is doing something that is really raising eyebrows
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and you're like oh my gosh I'm like genuinely concerned for
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you let them know you know you're not their therapist like you're also gonna be real with them oh
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if they want the harsh truth you gotta tell them too
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and that's what being a friend is it's about learning
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when to listen and also when to challenge them and
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when to soothe them i don't know there's many hats you wear as a friend
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but either way bottom line foundational pillars for a friendship it's trust
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and non -judgment it took me a hot minute to be okay with spending an evening to myself.
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Because whenever I had a night off, I would say yes to everything.
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Yes to parties, events, a dinner, I was there.
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I just thought, oh, I'm just very extroverted.
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But if I am honest with myself, I think I was just very uncomfortable being by myself.
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Because when you co -parent, the contrast is so intense.
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You go from like a high energy filled day, filled with noise, toys, and just like constant caretaking.
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And then once they're with the other parent, it's just absolute silence It's like ringing silence
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and you just end up feeling extremely empty
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And I just didn't know how to deal with
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that I really started to romanticize and look forward to my alone time And I would be lying to you saying like, oh my gosh, I instantly felt amazing No, there have been so many nights where I'm just crying,
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doing my skincare Being like everything is fine
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when it clearly did not feel fine I think
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that was like one of the main things
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that I had to face was like that I'm alone
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and that's okay I don't know I think like just the
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best way to describe my loneliness was it felt like this big swallowing black hole
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that it was just like coming after me and
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if I was alone like I felt like it would just swallow me
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and like I wouldn't exist I know that doesn't make sense but that's that's how
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urgent it felt to run away from this because I felt like
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if I'm not with people like who am I another thought
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that came to my head was like I'm gonna to feel
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this way forever you know I'm gonna feel I'm gonna feel lonely
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and sad and like a loser for the rest of my life
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but but now I know
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that that's not true like no amount of sadness is going
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to kill me I'm beginning to like trust myself knowing
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that I'm going to make it through like I know
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that I have the capacity to see this through see it out and a lot of the times after I sleep
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I'll feel a little bit better.
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Not 100%, but at least 20, 30%.
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Like honestly, a solid night's sleep is life's biggest medicines.
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I feel like after doing it for like a good solid year, I have gotten into a better rhythm of my solo time.
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I really enjoy my routine and I find that instead of like expending energy, now I feel like I'm really recharging.
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I'm doing the things that I know that I like to do.
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Like I love cooking a dinner for myself, meal prepping.
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I love reorganizing a drawer for myself so that when I open it, I'm like, oh my gosh, I can't believe I did this for myself.
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I love doing my skincare routine.
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I love going on a walk with Cheeky at night.
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I love reading and writing.
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And so if anything, it's nice to do these solitary activities.
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I'm not lonely.
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I'm just embracing my solitude.
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And I feel like never more than ever, I've been really practicing.
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I've been really using this muscle and it feels good.
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Success looks very different to me today
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because as much as I don't want to admit this in
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my 20s my success was completely tied to the metrics of my channel
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if my channel was booming
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if a video performed well I would be like yes I did it but
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if something underperformed I would be like I suck I think
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especially after becoming a mom it really kind of like put things into perspective
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and I think by 2026 I can confidently say
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that I don't care anymore after my divorce I took like kind of a break on social media
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and once i came back i was like yeah the landscape has definitely changed
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but now like i really do not take algorithms personally like it's just it just is what it is
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and at this point like if a video does well i'm like great
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but if it doesn't go well i'm like great i'm just excited
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and honestly grateful
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that i literally still have a platform to do this especially youtube like oh my gosh
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if i didn't have youtube i don't know how i would
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express myself Success right now looks like maintenance for me Like maybe I did, maybe I got a little up But as long as I stay generally in this line,
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I'll be grateful Even if I tank a bit, I'm like, this is fine Because I think I've learned that
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when you relentlessly push for professional growth It often just buys you more work
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and more stress And now that my son is five, like I do not want to blink
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and have his childhood be over Like it is
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so sacred to me Like I don't know maybe in 10
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years like he's gonna be like embarrassed to be around me But like right now
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I'm his favorite person or like me and Ben are both his favorite people, but you know what I mean when I walk into a room he's like
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You know what he means like I know
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that these days are limited for that and and when that day comes where
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He doesn't want to hang out with me Like I'm gonna have to accept
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that but I want to know
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that I showed up for him in his childhood as a present loving mother
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and so I have very bright lines when I work.
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When he gets home from school, I stop working.
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So the evenings and the weekends are strictly reserved for my family and I really like it this way.
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I feel like I finally have like a really good balance between work and my personal life.
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These are the times I will be aching for when I'm 85 or I don't know, or when my deathbed is happening, I'll be like, dang, I really missed when I was 36.
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Success is not just about like maintaining like my professional life, but also my personal life.
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I want to be an attentive mother, I want to be a dependable daughter, I want to be a communicative co -parent, I want to be a grounded and available friend.
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This is a lot, you know?
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And if I've cashed all my chips on like, bro, I want to have the most successful career and I want to jack the algorithm and make the most engaging video,
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I'm not going to have time for all of this.
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And I accept
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that like i would rather i'd rather just be like kind of mediocre at my job
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but like a stellar family member
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and friend like that's what success looks like for me i
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feel like maybe my creative ambition might surge again at some point
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but right now it's really protecting this like work personal life
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boundary for me honestly stepping into 36 i do feel like
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a different person like it's not like a day to night situation
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but when i read my entries from 35 to who i am now those 365 days
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a lot of change has happened and i wouldn't say it was my happiest year
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but it was my best year
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and i don't know i'm like actually really excited to see
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what kind of lessons i learned this following one i want to thank you guys
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so much for watching this video
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and for being this community who has really seen me through
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so many of my chapters the beautiful ones the messy ones
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and even just the mundane ones if you guys want to share any revelations
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or realizations you've had please write it in the comments down below love it
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when you guys do all right i'll talk to you guys in the next one bye
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Thank you.
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Vocabolario e note di pronuncia per questa lezione
Questa lezione di conversazione si basa sul video “Life Lessons at 36”. Questo video contiene 245 frasi e 2990 parole da ripetere con lo shadowing. Il parlato dura 14:57. Chi parla va veloce, circa 200 parole al minuto: aspettati suoni legati e ridotti. Solo il 80% delle parole rientra nelle 3.000 più comuni dell’inglese, quindi il lessico è impegnativo.
Vocaboli chiave di questo video
15 parole del video che vale la pena imparare, con pronuncia e significato:
| Parola | Pronuncia | Significato |
|---|---|---|
| gosh | /ɡɑːʃ/ | perbacco, accidenti |
| lesson sostantivo | /ˈlɛs.ən/ | lezione |
| swallow verbo | /ˈswɑ.loʊ/ | inghiottire, ingerire |
| routine sostantivo | /ɹuˈtin/ | routine, tran tran |
| chip sostantivo | /t͡ʃɪp/ | frammento, scheggia |
| vent sostantivo | /vɛnt/ | sfogo, sfiatatoio |
| ventilation sostantivo | /ˌvɛntɪˈleɪʃ(ə)n/ | ventilazione |
| ignore verbo | /ɪɡˈnɔː/ | ignorare |
| silence sostantivo | /ˈsaɪ̯ləns/ | silenzio |
| anger sostantivo | /ˈæŋɡə/ | ira, rabbia |
| friendship sostantivo | /ˈfɹɛn(d)ʃɪp/ | amicizia |
| divorce sostantivo | /dɪˈvɔːs/ | divorzio |
| grateful aggettivo | /ˈɡɹeɪtf(ə)l/ | grato |
| trap sostantivo | /tɹæp/ | trappola, tranello |
| judgment sostantivo | /ˈd͡ʒʌd͡ʒ.mənt/ | giudizio |
I phrasal verb che sentirai
| Parola | Significato |
|---|---|
| end up verbo | andare a finire, finire |
| go through verbo | attraversare |
| come back verbo | tornare |
| get away with verbo | farla franca, cavarsela |
| give up verbo | arrendersi |
| go away verbo | partire, andarsene |
| look forward to verbo | non vedere l'ora |
| sit down verbo | sedersi, accomodarsi |
Frasi da ripetere
Frasi brevi e complete del video che puoi riutilizzare nella conversazione di tutti i giorni:
- I'm just, I just got to go home.
- I just thought, oh, I'm just very extroverted.
- I'll feel a little bit better.
- I'm just embracing my solitude.
La grammatica di questo video
Le strutture che chi parla usa di più, con le parole esatte del video:
| Struttura | Nel video |
|---|---|
| Frasi condizionali if + frase, will/would + verbo — una condizione e il suo risultato | if a video performed well I would be · if something underperformed I would be |
| Present perfect have/has + participio passato — un’azione passata che conta ancora adesso | I've come · i've been told · haven't seen |
| Forma passiva be + participio passato — conta ciò che accade, non chi lo fa | was trapped · i've been told · was really confronted |
Pronuncia a cui fare attenzione
Chi parla usa 120 contrazioni e forme ridotte, come I'm, don't, I'll. Pronunciale nella forma breve, così come le senti.
- I suoni “th”: algorithm /ˈælɡəɹɪðm̩/, rhythm /ˈɹɪð.əm/, therapist /ˈθɛɹəpɪst/, thoughtful /ˈθɔːtfəl/, cathartic /kəˈθɑɹtɪk/
- I suoni “sh” e “zh”: gosh /ɡɑːʃ/, ventilation /ˌvɛntɪˈleɪʃ(ə)n/, friendship /ˈfɹɛn(d)ʃɪp/, contrast /kənˈt(ʃ)ɹæst/, shock /ʃɔk/
- Parole lunghe — attenzione all’accento: ventilation /ˌvɛntɪˈleɪʃ(ə)n/, uncomfortable /ʌnˈkʌm.fɚ.tə.bl̩/, genuinely /ˈd͡ʒɛn.ju.ɪn.li/, necessarily /ˌnɛs.əˈsɛɹ.ə.li/, intelligent /ɪnˈtɛlɪd͡ʒənt/
I suoni difficili per chi parla italiano:
- /h/ — va soffiata, non è muta: habit /ˈhæb.ɪt/, hilarious /hɪˈlɛə.ɹi.əs/, wherever /(h)wɛɹˈɛvɚ/, harsh /ˈhɑɹʃ/, homesick /ˈhoʊ̯m.sɪk/
- Consonante finale — senza aggiungere una vocale dopo: gosh /ɡɑːʃ/, chip /t͡ʃɪp/, vent /vɛnt/, silence /ˈsaɪ̯ləns/, friendship /ˈfɹɛn(d)ʃɪp/
- /æ/ — più aperta della “e”: anger /ˈæŋɡə/, trap /tɹæp/, habit /ˈhæb.ɪt/, algorithm /ˈælɡəɹɪðm̩/, contrast /kənˈt(ʃ)ɹæst/
Come esercitarsi con questo video
- Ascolta tutto il video una volta senza parlare e annota le parole che non conosci.
- Inizia a velocità 0,75×, fai shadowing frase per frase e torna alla velocità normale quando diventa facile.
- Registrati e confronta con l’originale, facendo attenzione a parole come gosh, lesson, swallow.
Cos'è la tecnica dello Shadowing?
Shadowing è una tecnica di apprendimento delle lingue supportata da studi scientifici, originariamente sviluppata per la formazione dei traduttori professionisti e resa popolare dal poliglotta Dr. Alexander Arguelles. Il metodo è semplice ma potente: ascolti un audio in inglese di madrelingua e lo ripeti immediatamente ad alta voce — come un'ombra che segue il parlante con un ritardo di solo 1–2 secondi. A differenza dell'ascolto passivo o degli esercizi di grammatica, lo shadowing costringe il tuo cervello e i muscoli della bocca a elaborare e riprodurre simultaneamente i modelli di discorso reale. La ricerca dimostra che migliora significativamente la precisione della pronuncia, l'intonazione, il ritmo, il discorso connesso, la comprensione dell'ascolto e la fluidità del parlato — rendendolo uno dei metodi più efficaci per la preparazione alla prova di speaking dell'IELTS e per la comunicazione reale in inglese.