쉐도잉 연습: How to Detach from People and Situations | @Thewizardliz - 영상으로 영어 말하기 배우기

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okay now going back to a little bit around the same topic

so another question we got a lot of is now

that we're on the topic of men

and dating is you know nowadays i don't know

if it's the way society is evolving or the changes in gender roles

and traditional roles

but now you see a lot of women are very successful right women are becoming more

and more independent and very financially independent and therefore successful

and you get these women these what you would term like high value

which i don't really like high value women are the ones struggling to find a partner why do you think

that is i think because um a lot of men are insecure

and a lot of men take their value from being successful

so when you take that away and you have a woman

that is more successful for than you

that becomes a competition for them you know

and i think that's actually sad because i I think people don't teach men to, like, for example, be more in touch with their emotions,

develop other skills than just making money, because then they can also get their value from those things.

But right now, because they put men on such a pedestal for so long, and they just poured into young men and whatever,

and women were just the housemakers, right?

Because they made that such a big thing.

Now you're sitting with all these men yeah they they just know okay i'll get my value

if i'm successful

if i'm successful i'm a good man no like look at

your morals who like who are you as a person get to know yourself better

and that's how you build

that confidence a confident man will not get intimidated by successful woman never ever ever

but there's just not enough confident men no and even you know

when you look at masculinity

so that's one question we got for you actually from my audience

which was you know there's kind of like a rise in

like soft masculinity you know where i don't know you must

have seen all of these funny reels where you know it's

like men want the princess treatment now they they don't want

to be the first one to text they don't want to

be the one to pay the whole 50 50 situation

that is coming up but do you think

that is also causing an issue with men just like understanding their role

and their position in society now i think men have always gotten the princess treatment

always i think there has never been another time the amount of standards men have for women is insane okay

but the minute you have a woman

that says like hey provide you know like take care of

me it's like no you're a goldie girl how dare you say

that but how many men would date an unattractive woman exactly they wouldn't they just simply wouldn't okay

because they have that standard if you're unattractive i don't want to date you

but once a woman has a standard and it's like if If you're a broke guy, and with broke guys, I don't mean men that are poor.

No. I mean men that don't know how to create abundance.

And that's a big, big issue.

See, for example, for me, a broke man, how I classify it, is like my dad.

My dad refused to work.

He doesn't want to work.

He doesn't want to figure out how to work.

He made my mom work her whole life, and she was taking care of him.

Okay?

He didn't respect himself, and he didn't respect my mother.

It was just not in balance at all

and my mom had to be hyper masculine to make up for the lack of masculine energy in the house.

Right?

Now, when you have that, a person that doesn't know how to be abundant, that's a broke guy.

Okay.

It doesn't matter how much money he makes as long as he's trying that's an abundant man

because a lot of people they especially women they think like

oh i just need a rich man i've dated a very

wealthy guy probably the wealthiest guy i've ever dated he was not generous at all brokey yeah

so that's a broke man

because what do i have with you you're showing me every day how much money you're making but

what do I have with it?

What do I care how much money you made?

You know?

So it's like, that's like just the difference.

Like when a man doesn't know how to be abundant, that's the big issue.

So men wanting the princess, I think they always had that, right?

So it's like, they always had a standard for a woman.

They always had like, you have to behave like this and blah, blah.

And even like before when women were supposed to be housemakers, there were

so many standards you're supposed to cook you're supposed to clean you're supposed to take care of the kids

and look good on top of that and

if you don't i'm gonna cheat on you and

if you do i'm gonna cheat on you

so it's like women had to accept that

but then you had women for example that have a platform like me

that came on and were like stop accepting it

and it's like let's have standards you know let's have standards as a collective

and because of that yeah you have what you have right now

which is very successful women because they started believing in themselves instead of a man

and chasing what they want

and being who they want to be instead of chasing a man

and like taking their value from being with a man

because that's also a huge issue

that women are facing you know they think like oh my god

if i'm not married by this age or

if i don't have children then i failed as a woman

but who said that society your parents your culture who said

that who set that standard for women who said that

if a woman has her period she's dirty she

that like that's dirty who said all these things

if men could get their period

and could get pregnant we would not be able to meet

their standards the they would have standards through the roof the like anything

that even is like um like tampons all these things it would be free it will be free yeah free

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and they would have made like uh medic medicine

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or something to solve like cramps

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and everything it would help you to help them massage tools

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at work yeah days off days off paid yes no for

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sure women would not be able to meet their standards no no

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and that's the thing i'm so glad you touched on this

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because this this has come up many times in conversations with my guests on the podcast

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and even with my friends i keep seeing this because now that women are getting in their mid-30s and late 30s, they're starting to worry.

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And all of these friends that I have, or even guests that I've met, one of them even said on the podcast that, you know, I feel like I have the villa that I always wanted.

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I have my cars, I have my six-figure business, and I sit in my house alone.

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And now I'm thinking, did I go wrong?

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Should I have focused on finding a husband?

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Should I have focused on having kids younger?

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Because that's when you are at your peak on the sexual market value, if you want to call it that.

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And now she's like, now what do I do?

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And now I see this kind of like, I don't know how to explain it other than passive depression

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that is rampant around where you see all these successful women

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who at the end of the day come home to like a quiet apartment

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and they are sad and they feel like they went wrong somewhere.

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What would you say to these people?

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I think that the grass is always greener on the other side i know

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that there's a lot of married women

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that wish they could come home to an empty house i swear like they have glamorized having children

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and married so much

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and people don't see the behind the scenes they always like show you the pretty picture

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but all the work

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that is behind the scenes all the arguments all the compromises all the things

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that cheating that happens

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and then you have to think oh my god do i want to stay married

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because i don't want to lose face in under you know in front of other people

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so i just stay married with a cheating husband

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and i just look nice in front of everyone

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and then someone looks at them and think oh i wish i had

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that no you don't you don't know what's going on in

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someone's house behind closed doors you know my parents like everyone

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that knew them they thought like oh father's a great guy

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such an amazing man such a religious man they would say you know behind closed doors

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that was literally the devil himself you know

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you never know what is going on so i would say never glamorize something

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if i think right now right now about having children

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and a husband that's a huge responsibility huge i i rather

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right now in this position of my life have my business make my own money and be independent

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and whoever comes into my life they can add to it but i'm not thinking like let me right now

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start a family because i know that will take

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so much of my time and energy into the family you know

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if i want to raise it in a way

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that i would want which is with full attention and everything

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so it all depends on like do you really want that

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or do you want to create a perfect picture for society

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because we have to really go back to the beliefs

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that we have because why do we have that

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because it's also it's not only women it's the same with men right

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if you don't get married as a man oh you're not

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a man you're not you have to you're not a father

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oh my god you're already late 30s you're not a father

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it's like why push things upon people some people don't want

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that that's okay some people do then yeah you find a

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way you date around you see does this match with me

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but don't do it because you feel like you're losing time

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because i feel like everything in life comes at the right time at divine timing

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when it's when it's meant for you when something is not meant for you, it will not happen no matter what you do.

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When something is meant for you, no one can take that from you ever.

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It will come in like in the most miraculous ways it will come.

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So just let it go.

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Women need to start letting stuff go.

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That is the biggest thing.

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Tell me how Liz.

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No, that is the biggest thing.

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Look, right before, this was actually a month ago, like one and a half months ago, I was so obsessed with the outcome.

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I became very masculine because I didn't have anyone supporting me.

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So I felt like I was completely alone, okay?

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So I was like, oh my God, I need to have this.

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I need to have this.

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I need to figure something out.

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And I was going crazy.

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So I was focused so much on my career and I was literally losing it, okay?

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And then I went back home because mentally I was not doing well.

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So I went back home to my mom and I went home.

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And then the second day I arrived, I went to walk in nature.

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And I always tell people, go walk in nature because nature is healing, right?

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The trees, the plants, all these things, these are living beings.

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I even tell people like, put your back or your hands against a tree.

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It will remove any energy that's not serving you because that's how we work with each other.

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But people don't know these things or they don't want to try these things.

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So they don't get like really further in life.

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Anyway, so I went and I walked in nature and I started talking to God.

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And I always used to do this thing a lot, like especially in the beginning of my career, like talking to God and having conversations like he's my best friend.

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Oh my God, I see the same thing, you know, we're going to talk about it.

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Yeah, keep going.

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Sorry.

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So then I was like, I was walking in nature and I started talking to him and I said, God, like, I can't take this anymore.

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Like, not like this.

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I'm like, I want to do what I have to do on this earth and complete my mission, but not like this, not on my own.

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And I feel very bad.

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And I said, like, I don't want to live anymore.

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And that was really my mental state.

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Like, I don't want to be here anymore, but I'm not going to do it myself.

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So you do it.

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Okay.

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You please take my life.

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So I was like, I said that and then all of a sudden while I was walking, I heard like, wanting nothing gives you everything.

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I heard that sentence in my head.

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And then I kept walking and I started repeating it out loud.

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I was like, wanting nothing gives you everything.

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And then I understood, wanting nothing gives you everything.

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I was too focused on, I need to have this.

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I need to have fun.

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I need to have work.

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I need to have this.

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I need to be bigger and bigger and I was too focused on them.

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So what I realized was if I just let go of, I don't want anything anymore.

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Like you handle it here, give it to God, you handle it.

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You know, when I did that, everything I've ever wanted came and it came so fast.

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Like these past one and a half months, my life has changed 360.

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I've probably never been happier than I am right now.

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Yeah, which is crazy.

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But it was the minute I just let it go.

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I was like, I don't care anymore.

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And you know, this is, you can see it, for example, and you know why this is also the thing?

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When you let something go, you take your power back.

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You take your energy from that thing back.

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Now, when you are too focused on things, for example, let's say you're obsessing over an ex, okay?

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The minute you stop wanting that ex, all of a sudden he texts you.

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All of a sudden he calls you.

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He's now obsessed with you.

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He comes back, yeah.

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Why?

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You took your energy back.

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The minute you take back your energy from all these things and you are now whole by yourself, those things become attracted to you

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and they want to be with you instead of you wanting to be with them because nothing likes desperation.

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Desperation is a repulsive energy.

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When you are desperate, you have a lack mindset.

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You don't believe that this earth is abundant and this earth is very abundant.

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God gave us everything.

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This is another thing that people always tell me like, oh, how dare you?

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You're asking for too much.

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Oh, why do you want these things?

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But there's billionaires on this earth like multiple multiple billionaires yeah

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why can i not have even 10 of what they have

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what does it matter money is is a is an abundant

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source as well you know money gives you freedom that's the only reason why i ever wanted money for freedom

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because i can go where i want i can do what i want i can help people in a way

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that i want right so if

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that is on earth why can i not have it

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if god made this earth so abundant anything that is on this earth i can have and i will get

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whenever I think to myself, okay, I want that, but I just want it and I don't focus on it like in a desperate way.

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But I know I have a goal in the back of my mind, but I'm not desperate for it.

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Right?

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That's when it comes.

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Oh, wow.

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Okay, I love that.

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이 레슨의 어휘와 말하기 포인트

이 B2 수준 말하기 레슨은 영상 “How to Detach from People and Situations”을(를) 바탕으로 합니다. 이 영상에는 섀도잉할 문장 250개와 단어 2831개가 있습니다. 말하는 구간의 길이는 13:56입니다. 화자는 분당 약 203단어로 빠르게 말하므로 연음과 약하게 발음되는 소리가 많습니다. 단어의 88%가 영어에서 가장 많이 쓰이는 3,000단어에 속해 어휘가 쉬운 편입니다.

이 영상의 핵심 어휘

영상에서 가장 어려운 단어 15개를 발음, 뜻과 함께 정리했습니다.

단어	발음	뜻
cheat 동사	/ˈt͡ʃiːt/	바람피우다, 바람을 피우다
masculine 형용사	/ˈmæskjələn/	남자다운
masculinity 명사	/ˌmæskjəˈlɪnɪti/	남성성
billionaire 명사	/ˌbɪl.jəˈnɛɚ/	억만장자
podcast 명사	/ˈpɑdˌkæst/	팟캐스트
intimidate 동사	/ɪnˈtɪmɪdeɪt/	협박하다, 위협하다
tampon 명사	[ˈtʰæmpɑn]	탐폰
behave 동사	/bɪˈheɪv/	처신하다, 행동하다
massage 명사	/məˈsɑ(d)ʒ/	마사지, 안마
passive 형용사	/ˈpæs.ɪv/	수동태
pour 동사	/poɹ/	붓다
nowadays 부사	/ˈnaʊ.ə.deɪz/	요즘
heal 동사	/ˈhiːl/	치료하다, 고치다
compromise 명사	/ˈkɑmpɹəˌmaɪz/	타협
emotion 명사	/ɪˈməʊ.ʃən/	감정

영상에 나오는 구동사

단어	뜻
come up 동사	올라오다
go back 동사	돌아가다
come back 동사	돌아오다
take back 동사	되찾다

따라 말해 볼 만한 문장

영상에 나오는 짧고 완결된 문장으로, 일상 대화에서 그대로 쓸 수 있습니다:

What do I care how much money you made?
And now I'm thinking, did I go wrong?
Should I have focused on finding a husband?
Should I have focused on having kids younger?
What would you say to these people?

이 영상의 문법

화자가 가장 많이 쓰는 문형을 영상 속 실제 표현과 함께 정리했습니다.

문형	영상 속 표현
현재완료 have/has + 과거분사 — 과거의 일이 지금도 관련이 있을 때	have seen · have always gotten · has never been
관계절 who / which + 절 — 사람이나 사물에 대한 추가 정보	women who said · want which is · Yeah, which is
수동태 be + 과거분사 — 누가 하는지보다 무슨 일이 일어나는지에 초점	is not meant · is meant

주의할 발음

화자는 don't, you're, I'm 같은 축약형과 약화된 형태를 79번 사용합니다. 들리는 대로 짧게 발음하세요.

“sh”와 “zh” 소리: desperation /ˌdɛspəˈɹeɪʃən/, massage /məˈsɑ(d)ʒ/, emotion /ɪˈməʊ.ʃən/
긴 단어 — 강세 위치에 주의: masculinity /ˌmæskjəˈlɪnɪti/, desperation /ˌdɛspəˈɹeɪʃən/, intimidate /ɪnˈtɪmɪdeɪt/, miraculous /mɪˈɹæk.jʊ.ləs/

한국어 화자가 어려워하는 소리:

/v/ — ㅂ(/b/)과 구별하기: repulsive /ɹɪˈpʌlsɪv/, evolve /ɪˈvɑlv/, behave /bɪˈheɪv/, passive /ˈpæs.ɪv/, villa /ˈvɪlə/
/z/ — ㅈ이 아니라 성대를 울리는 /s/: nowadays /ˈnaʊ.ə.deɪz/, compromise /ˈkɑmpɹəˌmaɪz/
/r/과 /l/ 구별하기: miraculous /mɪˈɹæk.jʊ.ləs/, repulsive /ɹɪˈpʌlsɪv/, reel /ˈɹiːl/

이 영상으로 연습하는 방법

먼저 말하지 않고 영상을 끝까지 듣고 모르는 단어를 적어 둡니다.
0.75배속으로 한 문장씩 섀도잉을 시작하고, 익숙해지면 보통 속도로 돌아갑니다.
자신의 목소리를 녹음해 원본과 비교하고, cheat, masculine, masculinity 같은 단어에 특히 주의합니다.

쉐도잉이란? 영어 실력을 빠르게 키우는 과학적 방법

쉐도잉(Shadowing)은 원래 전문 통역사 훈련을 위해 개발된 언어 학습 기법으로, 다언어 학자인 Dr. Alexander Arguelles에 의해 대중화된 방법입니다. 핵심 원리는 간단하지만 매우 강력합니다: 원어민의 영어를 들으면서 1~2초의 짧은 지연으로 즉시 소리 내어 따라 말하는 것——마치 '그림자(shadow)'처럼 화자를 따라가는 것입니다. 문법 공부나 수동적인 청취와 달리, 쉐도잉은 뇌와 입 근육이 동시에 실시간으로 영어를 처리하고 재현하도록 훈련합니다. 연구에 따르면 이 방법은 발음 정확도, 억양, 리듬, 연음, 청취력, 말하기 유창성을 크게 향상시킵니다. IELTS 스피킹 준비와 자연스러운 영어 소통을 원하는 분들에게 특히 효과적입니다.

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쉐도잉 연습: How to Detach from People and Situations | @Thewizardliz - 영상으로 영어 말하기 배우기

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