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okay now going back to a little bit around the same topic

so another question we got a lot of is now

that we're on the topic of men

and dating is you know nowadays i don't know

if it's the way society is evolving or the changes in gender roles

and traditional roles

but now you see a lot of women are very successful right women are becoming more

and more independent and very financially independent and therefore successful

and you get these women these what you would term like high value

which i don't really like high value women are the ones struggling to find a partner why do you think

that is i think because um a lot of men are insecure

and a lot of men take their value from being successful

so when you take that away and you have a woman

that is more successful for than you

that becomes a competition for them you know

and i think that's actually sad because i I think people don't teach men to, like, for example, be more in touch with their emotions,

develop other skills than just making money, because then they can also get their value from those things.

But right now, because they put men on such a pedestal for so long, and they just poured into young men and whatever,

and women were just the housemakers, right?

Because they made that such a big thing.

Now you're sitting with all these men yeah they they just know okay i'll get my value

if i'm successful

if i'm successful i'm a good man no like look at

your morals who like who are you as a person get to know yourself better

and that's how you build

that confidence a confident man will not get intimidated by successful woman never ever ever

but there's just not enough confident men no and even you know

when you look at masculinity

so that's one question we got for you actually from my audience

which was you know there's kind of like a rise in

like soft masculinity you know where i don't know you must

have seen all of these funny reels where you know it's

like men want the princess treatment now they they don't want

to be the first one to text they don't want to

be the one to pay the whole 50 50 situation

that is coming up but do you think

that is also causing an issue with men just like understanding their role

and their position in society now i think men have always gotten the princess treatment

always i think there has never been another time the amount of standards men have for women is insane okay

but the minute you have a woman

that says like hey provide you know like take care of

me it's like no you're a goldie girl how dare you say

that but how many men would date an unattractive woman exactly they wouldn't they just simply wouldn't okay

because they have that standard if you're unattractive i don't want to date you

but once a woman has a standard and it's like if If you're a broke guy, and with broke guys, I don't mean men that are poor.

No. I mean men that don't know how to create abundance.

And that's a big, big issue.

See, for example, for me, a broke man, how I classify it, is like my dad.

My dad refused to work.

He doesn't want to work.

He doesn't want to figure out how to work.

He made my mom work her whole life, and she was taking care of him.

Okay?

He didn't respect himself, and he didn't respect my mother.

It was just not in balance at all

and my mom had to be hyper masculine to make up for the lack of masculine energy in the house.

Right?

Now, when you have that, a person that doesn't know how to be abundant, that's a broke guy.

Okay.

It doesn't matter how much money he makes as long as he's trying that's an abundant man

because a lot of people they especially women they think like

oh i just need a rich man i've dated a very

wealthy guy probably the wealthiest guy i've ever dated he was not generous at all brokey yeah

so that's a broke man

because what do i have with you you're showing me every day how much money you're making but

what do I have with it?

What do I care how much money you made?

You know?

So it's like, that's like just the difference.

Like when a man doesn't know how to be abundant, that's the big issue.

So men wanting the princess, I think they always had that, right?

So it's like, they always had a standard for a woman.

They always had like, you have to behave like this and blah, blah.

And even like before when women were supposed to be housemakers, there were

so many standards you're supposed to cook you're supposed to clean you're supposed to take care of the kids

and look good on top of that and

if you don't i'm gonna cheat on you and

if you do i'm gonna cheat on you

so it's like women had to accept that

but then you had women for example that have a platform like me

that came on and were like stop accepting it

and it's like let's have standards you know let's have standards as a collective

and because of that yeah you have what you have right now

which is very successful women because they started believing in themselves instead of a man

and chasing what they want

and being who they want to be instead of chasing a man

and like taking their value from being with a man

because that's also a huge issue

that women are facing you know they think like oh my god

if i'm not married by this age or

if i don't have children then i failed as a woman

but who said that society your parents your culture who said

that who set that standard for women who said that

if a woman has her period she's dirty she

that like that's dirty who said all these things

if men could get their period

and could get pregnant we would not be able to meet

their standards the they would have standards through the roof the like anything

that even is like um like tampons all these things it would be free it will be free yeah free

100

and they would have made like uh medic medicine

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or something to solve like cramps

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and everything it would help you to help them massage tools

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at work yeah days off days off paid yes no for

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sure women would not be able to meet their standards no no

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and that's the thing i'm so glad you touched on this

106

because this this has come up many times in conversations with my guests on the podcast

107

and even with my friends i keep seeing this because now that women are getting in their mid-30s and late 30s, they're starting to worry.

108

And all of these friends that I have, or even guests that I've met, one of them even said on the podcast that, you know, I feel like I have the villa that I always wanted.

109

I have my cars, I have my six-figure business, and I sit in my house alone.

110

And now I'm thinking, did I go wrong?

111

Should I have focused on finding a husband?

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Should I have focused on having kids younger?

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Because that's when you are at your peak on the sexual market value, if you want to call it that.

114

And now she's like, now what do I do?

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And now I see this kind of like, I don't know how to explain it other than passive depression

116

that is rampant around where you see all these successful women

117

who at the end of the day come home to like a quiet apartment

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and they are sad and they feel like they went wrong somewhere.

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What would you say to these people?

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I think that the grass is always greener on the other side i know

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that there's a lot of married women

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that wish they could come home to an empty house i swear like they have glamorized having children

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and married so much

124

and people don't see the behind the scenes they always like show you the pretty picture

125

but all the work

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that is behind the scenes all the arguments all the compromises all the things

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that cheating that happens

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and then you have to think oh my god do i want to stay married

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because i don't want to lose face in under you know in front of other people

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so i just stay married with a cheating husband

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and i just look nice in front of everyone

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and then someone looks at them and think oh i wish i had

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that no you don't you don't know what's going on in

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someone's house behind closed doors you know my parents like everyone

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that knew them they thought like oh father's a great guy

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such an amazing man such a religious man they would say you know behind closed doors

137

that was literally the devil himself you know

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you never know what is going on so i would say never glamorize something

139

if i think right now right now about having children

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and a husband that's a huge responsibility huge i i rather

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right now in this position of my life have my business make my own money and be independent

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and whoever comes into my life they can add to it but i'm not thinking like let me right now

143

start a family because i know that will take

144

so much of my time and energy into the family you know

145

if i want to raise it in a way

146

that i would want which is with full attention and everything

147

so it all depends on like do you really want that

148

or do you want to create a perfect picture for society

149

because we have to really go back to the beliefs

150

that we have because why do we have that

151

because it's also it's not only women it's the same with men right

152

if you don't get married as a man oh you're not

153

a man you're not you have to you're not a father

154

oh my god you're already late 30s you're not a father

155

it's like why push things upon people some people don't want

156

that that's okay some people do then yeah you find a

157

way you date around you see does this match with me

158

but don't do it because you feel like you're losing time

159

because i feel like everything in life comes at the right time at divine timing

160

when it's when it's meant for you when something is not meant for you, it will not happen no matter what you do.

161

When something is meant for you, no one can take that from you ever.

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It will come in like in the most miraculous ways it will come.

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So just let it go.

164

Women need to start letting stuff go.

165

That is the biggest thing.

166

Tell me how Liz.

167

No, that is the biggest thing.

168

Look, right before, this was actually a month ago, like one and a half months ago, I was so obsessed with the outcome.

169

I became very masculine because I didn't have anyone supporting me.

170

So I felt like I was completely alone, okay?

171

So I was like, oh my God, I need to have this.

172

I need to have this.

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I need to figure something out.

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And I was going crazy.

175

So I was focused so much on my career and I was literally losing it, okay?

176

And then I went back home because mentally I was not doing well.

177

So I went back home to my mom and I went home.

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And then the second day I arrived, I went to walk in nature.

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And I always tell people, go walk in nature because nature is healing, right?

180

The trees, the plants, all these things, these are living beings.

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I even tell people like, put your back or your hands against a tree.

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It will remove any energy that's not serving you because that's how we work with each other.

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But people don't know these things or they don't want to try these things.

184

So they don't get like really further in life.

185

Anyway, so I went and I walked in nature and I started talking to God.

186

And I always used to do this thing a lot, like especially in the beginning of my career, like talking to God and having conversations like he's my best friend.

187

Oh my God, I see the same thing, you know, we're going to talk about it.

188

Yeah, keep going.

189

Sorry.

190

So then I was like, I was walking in nature and I started talking to him and I said, God, like, I can't take this anymore.

191

Like, not like this.

192

I'm like, I want to do what I have to do on this earth and complete my mission, but not like this, not on my own.

193

And I feel very bad.

194

And I said, like, I don't want to live anymore.

195

And that was really my mental state.

196

Like, I don't want to be here anymore, but I'm not going to do it myself.

197

So you do it.

198

Okay.

199

You please take my life.

200

So I was like, I said that and then all of a sudden while I was walking, I heard like, wanting nothing gives you everything.

201

I heard that sentence in my head.

202

And then I kept walking and I started repeating it out loud.

203

I was like, wanting nothing gives you everything.

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And then I understood, wanting nothing gives you everything.

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I was too focused on, I need to have this.

206

I need to have fun.

207

I need to have work.

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I need to have this.

209

I need to be bigger and bigger and I was too focused on them.

210

So what I realized was if I just let go of, I don't want anything anymore.

211

Like you handle it here, give it to God, you handle it.

212

You know, when I did that, everything I've ever wanted came and it came so fast.

213

Like these past one and a half months, my life has changed 360.

214

I've probably never been happier than I am right now.

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Yeah, which is crazy.

216

But it was the minute I just let it go.

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I was like, I don't care anymore.

218

And you know, this is, you can see it, for example, and you know why this is also the thing?

219

When you let something go, you take your power back.

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You take your energy from that thing back.

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Now, when you are too focused on things, for example, let's say you're obsessing over an ex, okay?

222

The minute you stop wanting that ex, all of a sudden he texts you.

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All of a sudden he calls you.

224

He's now obsessed with you.

225

He comes back, yeah.

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Why?

227

You took your energy back.

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The minute you take back your energy from all these things and you are now whole by yourself, those things become attracted to you

229

and they want to be with you instead of you wanting to be with them because nothing likes desperation.

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Desperation is a repulsive energy.

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When you are desperate, you have a lack mindset.

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You don't believe that this earth is abundant and this earth is very abundant.

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God gave us everything.

234

This is another thing that people always tell me like, oh, how dare you?

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You're asking for too much.

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Oh, why do you want these things?

237

But there's billionaires on this earth like multiple multiple billionaires yeah

238

why can i not have even 10 of what they have

239

what does it matter money is is a is an abundant

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source as well you know money gives you freedom that's the only reason why i ever wanted money for freedom

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because i can go where i want i can do what i want i can help people in a way

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that i want right so if

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that is on earth why can i not have it

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if god made this earth so abundant anything that is on this earth i can have and i will get

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whenever I think to myself, okay, I want that, but I just want it and I don't focus on it like in a desperate way.

246

But I know I have a goal in the back of my mind, but I'm not desperate for it.

247

Right?

248

That's when it comes.

249

Oh, wow.

250

Okay, I love that.

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Лексика и советы по произношению к этому уроку

Этот урок разговорной практики уровня B2 построен на видео «How to Detach from People and Situations». В этом видео 250 предложений и 2831 слов для шедоуинга. Речь длится 13:56. Говорящий говорит быстро, около 203 слов в минуту, поэтому звуки часто сливаются и сокращаются. 88% слов входят в 3000 самых частых слов английского языка, поэтому лексика простая.

Ключевая лексика этого видео

Самые сложные слова из видео (15), с произношением и значением:

Слово	Произношение	Значение
abundant прилагательное	/əˈbʌn.dənt/	оби́льный, изоби́лующий
cheat глагол	/ˈt͡ʃiːt/	моше́нничать, смоше́нничать
obsess глагол	/əbˈsɛs/	заци́клиться, заци́кливаться
masculine прилагательное	/ˈmæskjələn/	мужско́й
masculinity существительное	/ˌmæskjəˈlɪnɪti/	му́жественность, маскули́нность
unattractive прилагательное		непригля́дный, неинтере́сный
desperation существительное	/ˌdɛspəˈɹeɪʃən/	отча́яние
billionaire существительное	/ˌbɪl.jəˈnɛɚ/	миллиарде́р, миллиарде́рша
podcast существительное	/ˈpɑdˌkæst/	подка́ст
classify глагол	/ˈklæs.əˌfaɪ/	классифици́ровать
intimidate глагол	/ɪnˈtɪmɪdeɪt/	пуга́ть, испуга́ть
medick существительное		люце́рна
miraculous прилагательное	/mɪˈɹæk.jʊ.ləs/	чудотво́рный, чудоде́йственный
pedestal существительное	/ˈpɛdɪstəl/	пьедеста́л, постаме́нт
repulsive прилагательное	/ɹɪˈpʌlsɪv/	отврати́тельный, омерзи́тельный

Фразовые глаголы, которые вы услышите

Слово	Значение
come up глагол	поднима́ться, подня́ться
go back глагол	возвраща́ться, возврати́ться
come back глагол	возвраща́ться, возврати́ться
figure out глагол	разбира́ться, разобра́ться
take back глагол	возвращать в, к

Фразы, которые стоит повторять

Короткие законченные фразы из видео, которые пригодятся в повседневном разговоре:

What do I care how much money you made?
And now I'm thinking, did I go wrong?
Should I have focused on finding a husband?
Should I have focused on having kids younger?
What would you say to these people?

Грамматика в этом видео

Конструкции, которые говорящий использует чаще всего, с точными словами из видео:

Конструкция	В видео
Present Perfect have/has + причастие прошедшего времени — прошлое действие, важное сейчас	have seen · have always gotten · has never been
Придаточные определительные who / which + предложение — уточнение о человеке или предмете	women who said · want which is · Yeah, which is
Пассивный залог be + причастие прошедшего времени — важно, что происходит, а не кто это делает	is not meant · is meant

Произношение, на которое стоит обратить внимание

Говорящий использует 79 сокращённых и редуцированных форм, например don't, you're, I'm. Произносите их коротко, так, как слышите.

Звуки «sh» и «zh»: desperation /ˌdɛspəˈɹeɪʃən/, massage /məˈsɑ(d)ʒ/, emotion /ɪˈməʊ.ʃən/
Длинные слова — следите за ударением: masculinity /ˌmæskjəˈlɪnɪti/, desperation /ˌdɛspəˈɹeɪʃən/, intimidate /ɪnˈtɪmɪdeɪt/, miraculous /mɪˈɹæk.jʊ.ləs/

Звуки, трудные для русскоязычных:

/h/ — лёгкий выдох, а не русское «х»: housemaker /ˈhaʊs.meɪ.kə/, behave /bɪˈheɪv/, heal /ˈhiːl/
Звонкие согласные в конце слова — не оглушайте их: repulsive /ɹɪˈpʌlsɪv/, evolve /ɪˈvɑlv/, behave /bɪˈheɪv/, massage /məˈsɑ(d)ʒ/, passive /ˈpæs.ɪv/

Как заниматься с этим видео

Прослушайте всё видео один раз молча и выпишите незнакомые слова.
Начните со скорости 0,75×, повторяйте предложение за предложением и вернитесь к обычной скорости, когда станет легко.
Запишите себя и сравните с оригиналом, обращая внимание на такие слова, как abundant, cheat, obsess.

Что такое техника Shadowing?

Shadowing — это научно обоснованная техника изучения языка, изначально разработанная для подготовки профессиональных переводчиков и популяризированная полиглотом доктором Александром Аргуэльесом. Метод прост, но эффективен: вы слушаете аудио на английском от носителей языка и немедленно повторяете вслух — как тень, следующая за говорящим с задержкой в 1–2 секунды. В отличие от пассивного прослушивания или грамматических упражнений, Shadowing заставляет мозг и мышцы рта одновременно обрабатывать и воспроизводить реальные речевые паттерны. Исследования показывают, что это значительно улучшает точность произношения, интонацию, ритм, связную речь, понимание на слух и беглость речи — что делает его одним из самых эффективных методов для подготовки к IELTS Speaking и реального общения на английском.

Техника шедоуинга: читать полное пошаговое руководство →

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