쉐도잉 연습: Philomena Cunk on Jesus - Part 1 - YouTube로 영어 말하기 배우기

B1
Humans craved enlightenment.
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Humans craved enlightenment.
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To find it, they'd need a spiritual role model,
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an icon, an almost Christ-like figure.
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And as luck would have it,
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someone fitting that bell was about to arrive.
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None other than Mr Jesus Christ.
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An icon who was almost as revered back then as Beyoncé is today.
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Jesus' mum was this woman,
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the Virgin Mary, who one night got visited by an angel and told she'd been gotten pregnant by a Holy Ghost.
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Of course, actual ghost is ectoplasm,
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which only contains ghost sperm.
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But Jesus wasn't born a phantom,
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leading experts to believe Mary wasn't impregnated by a real ghost,
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but by a man in a sheet, like in Scooby-Doo.
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Jesus was born Jewish, but soon converted to carpentry as he followed his dad into the primitive chair and table industry.
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What's ironic about Jesus Christ becoming a carpenter was he was
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actually named after the two words you're most likely to shout after hitting your thumb with a hammer.
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Scholars believe he was a real historical figure,
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like Justin Timberlake or Garfield.
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Whether or not they think he was the actual son of God who performed miracles,
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like walking on wine or helping a deaf man seek,
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they all agree he preached tolerance and forgiveness.
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A message so important his most ardent followers would eventually start killing anyone who didn't want to hear it.
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I don't want to hear it.
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Murray had to give birth here on the floor,
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like a crack addict, and then lay him in a manger.
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Manger is another word for trough,
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and it's where we get the name for modern sandwich chain ready to trough.
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He was born in a humble stable,
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which, ironically, isn't a stable environment for a baby,
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unless it's a baby donkey,
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which, if records are to be believed, Jesus wasn't.
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In fact, as this actual painting makes clear,
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when Christ was born, he had a magic flaming circle on his head,
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which would have set fire to all the hay and pubes as he came out.
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The baby Jesus wasn't an ordinary baby.
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He was born with a big yellow circle round his head,
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which must have been hell for Mary to push out,
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especially when you think nothing had ever been in or out of her down below before.
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If only he had been born a ghost after all.
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Then he could have just floated out,
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clanking chains and going woo.
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Where did Father Christmas come from?
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Father Christmas comes from St Nicholas,
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and he is a fourth-century Greek saint and bishop,
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and he was very renowned for giving presents to the poor,
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and particularly he gave presents to these three girls.
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If he hadn't given them the money,
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they would have had to go off and be prostitutes.
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So why was he knocking about with these prostitutes?
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I don't think he knew them very well.
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It's just that they...
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Well, well enough to give them gifts.
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...give them money.
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I don't...
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I think he just wanted to save them from the horrors of...
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I think because basically...
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Well, they all say that, don't they?
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They do.
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How come shops have Father Christmases,
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but they don't have Jesuses?
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Is Jesuses the right term?
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Is it G's I?
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Is it Jezi or...?
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I think we'd say Figures of Jesus.
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Figures of Jesus?
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I think that Father Christmas himself would probably have preferred there to be Figures of Jesus,
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because, in fact, there is a medieval story.
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St Nicholas got in a punch-up about whether or not God or Jesus was greater and was thrown into prison.
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So he was obviously very exercised about the purity of religion.
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It's all coming out, isn't it?
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You know, cos, like, I didn't know that I used to hang about with prostitutes or get into fights.
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Now I'm feeling less happy with him coming down my chimney.
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Jesus was killed because people didn't like what he was saying,
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So could you call him the first celebrity victim of cancel culture?
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I think cancel culture would sort of require the idea
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that people really saw Jesus as standing for something and they were sure they knew what it was.
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Oh, no. Sorry.
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That wasn't the question.
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I'm literally asking if you could call him the first celebrity victim of cancel culture for our show.
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Down that lens there.
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You know, it's a sort of,
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it's for a credit sequence with punchy sound bites in it.
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Off you go.
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Down that, down that lens.
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Okay, down this lens.
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Yeah.
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You might even say Jesus was the first celebrity victim of cancel culture.
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Brilliant, thank you.

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주요 어휘 및 구문

  • enlightenment - 계몽
  • spiritual role model - 영적 역할 모델
  • Virgin Mary - 성모 마리아
  • miracles - 기적
  • tolerance - 관용
  • forgiveness - 용서
  • humble stable - 겸손한 외양간
  • Father Christmas - 크리스마스 아버지

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