쉐도잉 연습: Think In English With Me | Episode 2: “Relationships“ - 영상으로 영어 말하기 배우기

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You know English, you've studied for years.

So why, when someone asks about your family, your best friend, the person you're dating, do you freeze?

And out comes, they're nice, we're close, flat, small, nothing like the real you.

It's not your English.

Nobody ever showed you how native speakers actually think through these answers.

So today we fixed that.

not going to translate.

We're going to think in English together.

Are you ready?

Well then let's jump right in section number one, the gap you can hear.

We're going to look at three real life situations, each shown two different ways.

How an English learner would handle it and how a native English speaker would handle it.

No teaching yet.

No breakdown, no analysis.

I just want you to listen to the differences.

The gap between the two versions is the whole point.

Once you hear it clearly, you can't unhear it.

Let's start with situation number one, the friend catching up.

Here's the learner version.

Person a, how was your new boyfriend?

Person B.

He's good.

We're happy.

Person a, that's nice.

How did you meet?

Person B at a party.

My friend introduced us.

That was good.

Very simple, but it was the learner version.

Now listen to the native English speaker version.

Person A.

Okay.

So how's it going with Danny?

You've been kind of quiet about him.

Person B.

I know I've been holding back.

It's going really well, actually like suspiciously well.

I keep waiting for the thing, you know, the red flag.

It just hasn't shown up yet.

Person A, maybe there isn't one.

Person B, that's what he says.

He's very, why are you looking for problems? Which, fair.

And honestly, even the way we met was ridiculous.

Kara sat us next to each other at her birthday and then wouldn't own up to it.

Very different conversations, both grammatically having no issues, but one is the learner version and one is the native speaker version.

What about this situation?

The manager.

Here's the learner version.

Person A.

How is the project with Mark?

Person B.

It is difficult.

He does not answer any emails.

Person A, I see that's a problem.

Person B, yes, I don't know what to do.

Again, good conversation, very simple, to the point, but still a learner version.

Now listen closely to the native English speaker version.

Person A, how's the handoff with Mark going?

I know that's been a little bumpy.

person B honestly it's been slow I'll send something over

and then hear nothing for three four days person A is it everything

or specific things person B mostly anything

that needs a decision from him quick questions he'll answer same day

so I don't read it as personal I think he's stretched thin.

He picked up two extra accounts last month and I'd rather not escalate over a bandwidth issue,

but I do need a decision by Thursday to protect the timeline.

Notice the difference again, the learner version and the native English speaker version.

What about this situation?

The siblings again, remember we are on section number one,

the gap you can hear just listening for the gaps between the learner version and the native English speaker version.

Now with this situation, we have two siblings.

Here's the learner version.

Person A, do you still talk to Nadia?

Person B, no, not really.

We stopped talking.

Person B, What happened?

Person B Nothing, we just became different.

That's the learner version.

Here's the native English speaker version.

Person A Hey, do you ever hear from Nadia anymore?

Person B Not in like two years.

It's weird because nothing happened.

There was no fight.

We just drifted apart and I don't think either of us noticed until it was already done.

Person A Do you miss her?

Person B.

Sometimes, mostly I miss who I was around her.

I was funnier back then, I think.

Two different versions.

The learner version and the native English speaker version.

You just listened to hear the gap.

Now we move to section number two.

The word you don't have yet.

You see, inside each native English speaker dialogue is a word or phrase that an English learner wouldn't think to use.

Not because it's complicated, but because nobody ever taught it as active vocabulary.

So we're going to pull one term out of each dialogue.

Three terms total.

These are real words used in real life by native English speakers.

The kind that shift how you sound the moment they enter your speech.

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These terms will make you sound more like a native.

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So section two, the word you don't have yet.

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Let's look at situation number one, situation number one.

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We had a dialogue.

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The term from that dialogue we're going to look at is holding back, holding back.

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Now, where does this live in the dialogue?

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The dialogue between the two individuals in the dialogue?

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This is how it was used.

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I've been holding back again.

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I've been holding back.

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So what does it mean in real use?

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It means deliberately keeping something to yourself like news and opinion of feeling usually out of hesitation or self-protection.

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This is the meaning of this term holding back.

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Now, why would you as an English learner not have this expression, this term?

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You see in a situation, you'd probably say, I didn't say anything or I kept it secret.

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Neither of these phrases though carries the sense of a choice made while being unsure.

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Holding back, however, contains the hesitation itself.

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When I, as a native English speaker say I was holding back, I'm letting the person listening to me know,

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ah, there was a measure of hesitation along with me not saying something.

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So here's how you can use it, right?

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I could tell she was holding back during the interview or don't hold back.

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I want the real feedback or he held back on announcing it until the contract was signed.

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This is how you can use it.

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These are examples of how you can use this term.

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What about situation number two?

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In situation number two, we had a new term, a new expression.

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Stretched thin.

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Stretched thin.

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So how was it used in the dialogue?

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This expression was used like this.

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I think he's stretched thin.

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I think he's stretched thin.

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Now, what does this mean in real use?

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What's the definition?

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You see, it means to be pulled in too many directions at once with not enough of you to go around.

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You can't spread yourself around.

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It's professional while still being warm.

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It explains someone's failure without blaming them.

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Ah, he's just stretched thin.

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He's not able to do everything, but it's very kind still.

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Now, why would you as an English learner not have this?

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You see, instead of saying stretched thin, you'd probably say he is very busy or he has too much work.

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These are accurate statements, but they're a little flat.

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Stretched thin, on the other hand, carries the sympathy built in,

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which is what makes it safe to say about a colleague in front of a manager.

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Hey, he's a bit stretched thin because it shows you care about the person.

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Now here's the portability check, right?

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How you can use this in many different ways.

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It's portable.

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It's a phrase that can be used in many different ways.

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The first way I'm stretched thin until Friday.

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Can this wait?

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Next, the support team's been stretched thin since the launch.

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And finally, she looked stretched thin.

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So I took two things off her plate.

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Again, stretched thin, a natural expression phrase that we as native English speakers use.

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What about situation three?

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Again, the dialogue between two native speakers in that dialogue, we had the expression drifted apart.

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Again, drifted apart.

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Now, where does this live in the dialogue?

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How was it used?

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It was used like this.

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We just drifted apart again.

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We just drifted apart.

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Now, what does this mean in real life?

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In real use to people slowly becoming distant with no single cause and no decision.

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The key ideas are gradual and unintentional.

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There was no fight.

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There was no argument.

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There was no disagreement.

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It just was a gradual separating gradual and unintentional.

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Now, why would you as an English learner probably not have this?

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Because you would probably just say we stopped talking, which sounds like somebody chose to stop talking.

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On the other hand, drifted apart is precisely the wording, the phrase we need for when nobody chose anything, it just happened.

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You see why listening to real conversations helps you start thinking like a native English speaker

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because there are lots of meanings behind what we say as native speakers.

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So how can you use this in many different ways?

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Drifted apart.

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Here's the portability.

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How portable is it?

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First, my college roommate and I drifted apart after graduation.

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Next, the two departments have drifted apart since the reorg.

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And finally, we drifted apart for a few years and then found our way back.

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Again, drifted apart.

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So section number two, the second part is all about finding the words you didn't have by looking at the dialogues,

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the conversations between native English speakers, which now leads us to section number three, how they build their sentences,

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how native English speakers build sentences.

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Now we have the same three dialogues, but now we look underneath.

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You see native speakers, native English speakers don't just use better words.

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We build our answers on hidden patterns, three patterns to recognize answering with details,

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defending an opinion with reasons, and walking someone through a personal experience.

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These are things that we build upon again, details, opinions, and personal experiences.

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Now, once you as an English learner see these patterns, you'll start hearing them everywhere.

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These are patterns that native speakers learn.

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I learned these patterns all throughout my schooling.

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So let's see what these patterns are.

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Situation.

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Number one, the structure was details.

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Listen, a learner would say he is good.

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We are happy, but that has zero detail.

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Remember the first dialogue he's good.

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We are happy, but there's no detail in this.

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The listener learns nothing about him, her, or them just knows the detail.

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No detail actually.

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However, what the native speaker does is stacks specific concrete details.

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So again, the learner just says, we're happy.

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We're good.

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No specific details, but the native speaker gives concrete and specific details.

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For example, what was the feeling?

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Suspiciously well in the dialogue.

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He said, suspiciously well, what's the thing being waited for the red flag.

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What were his actual words?

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Remember she was talking about her boyfriend, his actual words.

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Why are you looking for problems?

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And then the meeting she explained, Kara sat us next to each other at her birthday.

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So what's the pattern that you should notice?

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Native English speakers answer how questions with things that you can picture, things that you can visualize,

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not abstractions, not we are happy.

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We give native speakers give specific images, specific.

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Woo.

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That was a tongue twister.

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Specific.

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That's staying in there.

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Specific quotes and specific scenes.

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We give details.

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In our first dialogue, we saw the female giving details about her boyfriend and their relationship.

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Then in situation number two, the structure was opinion plus reasons.

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Opinion plus reasons.

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Now, what does the learner do?

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When we looked at the dialogue for situation two, the learner just said, he does not answer my emails.

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I don't know what to do.

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This states the problem, but it gives no read on it.

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You don't know what's going on.

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You don't have an opinion and it hands the thinking to someone else.

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A learner is just stating, Hey, this is the problem, but I don't know what to do.

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However, what does a native speaker do?

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A native speaker on the other hand, lays out evidence, then stakes a position, gives the evidence and then gives a position.

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Listen from the dialogue for situation number two, here's the first evidence.

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I'll send something over and then hear nothing for three or four days.

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They gave evidence.

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Evidence number two, quick questions.

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He'll answer the same day.

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Remember this was said during the conversation.

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The conclusion is then drawn.

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So I don't read it as personal.

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I think he's stretched thin giving an opinion position.

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I'd rather not escalate over a bandwidth issue, but I do need a decision by Thursday.

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You see the difference.

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The learner said he doesn't answer my emails.

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I don't know what to do.

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Whereas the native speaker gives evidences and then says, Hey, this is what I'm thinking.

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And this is my position.

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Here's the pattern I want you to notice when it comes to the structure of opinion plus reasons,

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the opinion arrives after the evidence, not before.

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So you're giving the evidence and then you're giving your opinion, right?

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The order is what makes it sound like analysis.

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Instead of complaining, the person's not complaining.

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They're just analyzing the evidence.

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And in a professional setting, that difference is everything.

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This makes a difference.

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So what about situation number three, situation number three, the structure is personal experience.

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You see these different structures, right?

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The first one was details.

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Then we had opinion plus reasons.

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Now we have personal experience.

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So what did the learner do in the dialogue?

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The learner said, we stopped talking.

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We just became different.

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That was the whole thing.

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It confirms the fact and then closes the door.

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What's the fact?

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We stopped talking.

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We just became different.

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Door closed.

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No more conversation.

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However, a native speaker does something different.

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A native speaker walks the listener through an actual experience.

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Listen closely to how the individual walked us through their experience.

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What was the timeframe?

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They said not in like two years, the obvious explanation removed.

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There was no fight.

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The real process named.

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We just drifted apart.

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The self knowledge.

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I don't think either of us noticed until it was already done.

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And finally the layer underneath.

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Mostly I miss who I was around her.

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So what's the pattern here? here, the pattern you should notice native English speakers don't summarize their experiences.

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It's not about memorization.

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Instead, they place the listener inside of the personal experience and then go one layer deeper than the question actually asked for.

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Take a person deeper.

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Again, section number three is all about how native speakers build their sentences by taking someone deeper,

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using details, using opinions and reasons, and using personal experiences.

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Now we move to section number four, how to sound exactly like the native English speaker.

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Here's where the two layers come together.

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The structure from section three plus the term from section two, working in one response.

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This is what it actually sounds like

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when a native speaker handles the situation at what it could sound like

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and what it could sound like coming out of your mouth.

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So let's start with situation number one.

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We learned that the structure is based on details and the term was holding back.

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So details plus holding back.

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So here's the learner response one more time, just for contrast.

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The learner response was, he is good.

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We are happy.

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Now here's the fully emulated native English speaker response using details and holding back.

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Honestly, it's going really well.

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I've been holding back on saying anything because I kept waiting for some red flag to show up and it just hasn't.

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Even the way we met was ridiculous.

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Kara sat us next to each other at her birthday and then acted like it was a coincidence.

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This is the entire native English response, English speaker, details, plus the term holding back.

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What do you notice?

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The structure supplies the images, the red flag, the birthday, the take or fake coincidence that Kara set up.

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However, the term supplies the reason those images went unmentioned until now.

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Details without the term sound like a story without a narrator.

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The term holding back without details sounds like a confession with nothing or nothing behind it.

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So again, these two together are important details plus holding back.

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What about situation number two?

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It's about to get interesting.

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Situation number two is opinion plus reasons plus the term stretched thin.

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Again, opinion plus reasons and then the term stretched thin.

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Now, here's what the learner response was one more time just for comparison.

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It is difficult.

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He does not answer my emails.

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The grammar is perfect, but that was a learner response.

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It is difficult.

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He does not answer my emails.

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Now we have the fully emulated native English response with the opinion, the reasons, and the expression stretched thin.

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Listen closely.

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It's been slow.

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Anything that needs a decision from him sits for three or four days.

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Quick questions he answers same day though, so I don't read it as personal.

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I think he's just stretched thin since he picked up those extra accounts.

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I'd rather not escalate over a bandwidth issue, but I do need a decision by Thursday to protect the timeline.

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This is the full response, opinion plus reasons plus stretched thin.

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So what you need to notice is this, the structure earns the conclusion by laying out the evidence first.

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The term delivers that conclusion generously instead of accusingly.

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Without it though, the sentence becomes, he has too much work.

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Same idea, but it sounds like a learner and slightly more like blame.

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This is why using the term stretched thin is so important

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and makes this sound more like a native English speaker said it.

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Now we look at situation number three.

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Personal experience is a structure and our term is drifted apart.

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Again, personal experience and drifted apart.

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So here's the learner response one more time for situation three.

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No, not really.

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We stopped talking again.

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No, not really.

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We stopped talking.

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That was the learner response.

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However, when we look at the fully emulated native English speaker response, we see the personal experience plus the term drifted apart.

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Listen closely, not in about two years years and the strange part is there was no fight.

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We just drifted apart and I don't think either of us noticed until it was already done.

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What I miss isn't even the conversations, it's who I was around her.

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So what I need you to notice, the experience structure, time frame, no fight, the real process,

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the layer underneath, it carries the whole answer.

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Now drifted apart the term is the term that explains an ending without assigning any blame to anyone,

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which is the only reason the sentence can turn inward instead of turning into an accusation because of this term,

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this natural term drifted apart.

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This now leads us to section number five.

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It's your turn to think in English.

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Now we have fresh questions, not dialogues, the kind of discussion questions that you could be asked in a real conversation tomorrow.

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Yep.

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Tomorrow.

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Each one comes with the flat learner response and then three native responses.

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One built on each pattern.

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Remember the patterns, details, opinions, plus reasons, and personal experience.

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The point isn't to memorize any of them.

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The point is to notice what changes when you,

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my friend, stop answering like a learner and start thinking like a native speaker.

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So let's dive deeper into these examples.

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Here's the question.

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Question number one.

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Are you close with your family?

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Again, are you close with your family?

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Now, a learner response would be, yes, we are close.

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We talk sometimes.

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Perfect grammar.

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No issue, but it's a learner response.

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Now let's check out three different native English speaker responses to the question.

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Are you close with your family?

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First native response based on the detailed structure.

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Pretty close.

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Yeah.

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My sister and I text constantly, mostly nonsense, screenshots, stuff we saw.

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And my mom calls every Sunday around noon, whether I pick up or not.

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The structure, giving details.

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Here's the second native response again to the question, are you close with your family?

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But this time using opinion plus reasons.

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Answer, closer than we used to be, honestly.

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We all live in different cities now and I think the distance made us more intentional about it.

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When you have to schedule a call, you actually show up for it.

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The structure, opinion plus reason.

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And finally, the third native response.

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Personal experience answering the question, are you close with your family?

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Here's the response.

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We weren't for a long time.

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Then my dad got sick a few years ago and everybody sort of collapsed back toward each other.

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It's better now, but it took something serious to get us there.

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So again, you see the three native responses based on the three structures.

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What about this question?

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Question number two, what makes someone a good friend?

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What makes someone a good friend?

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Now here's the learner response, a very simple response that a learner would give.

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A good friend is kind and helps you.

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That's good.

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The grammar is great, but it's not a native English speaker response.

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So now to the same question, we're going to look at three native responses based on the three structures, details, opinions, plus reasons and personal experience.

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So again, the question, what makes someone a good friend?

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And native response number one, based on details.

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Someone who remembers the small stuff.

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They'll text you the morning of your job interview unprompted, or they'll bring up something you mentioned once four months ago.

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That's the whole thing, really.

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That's details.

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Native response number two, opinion plus reasons.

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Consistency more than anything.

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Plenty of people are wonderful when things are exciting.

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The ones worth keeping are the ones still around during the boring stretches

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when there's nothing to celebrate and nothing to show up for.

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And finally, the third native response based on the structure of personal experience.

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The question again, what makes someone a good friend?

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I found out when I moved and was completely miserable for about six months.

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One person kept checking in even when I was terrible company.

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I didn't really understand what friendship was until then.

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So question two, what makes a good friend?

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We have three natural responses.

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Why?

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Because of the structures.

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And what about question number three?

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Do you find it easy to make new friends as an adult?

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Here's the learner response.

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No, it is difficult.

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I don't have time.

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Again, do you find it easy to make new friends as an adult?

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The learner response, it answers the question, but there's no structure.

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So it's a learner response.

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Now look at these three native responses.

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Response number one, based on the detailed structure.

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Not really.

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It's the repetition you lose in school.

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You saw the same people every day at the same time.

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Now you schedule a coffee three weeks out and one of you cancels.

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Here's the second native response based on the structure of opinion plus reasons.

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Again, the question, do you find it easy to make new friends as an adult?

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Harder, but I don't think it's about time.

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I think adults are afraid to look like they need people.

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Nobody wants to be the one who follows up twice.

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So everybody waits and nothing happens.

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And finally, response number three, the native response based on our structure of personal experience.

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Same question.

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Do you find it easy to make new friends as an adult?

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Here's the response.

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It took me two years to make one real friend after I moved.

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We ended up in the same running group and just kept showing up on the same mornings.

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Proximity did what effort couldn't.

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This is how you start thinking in English.

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Section five is your turn to think in English, but look at the sections we went through.

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We started by listening to real English conversations, and finally we were led to the structures that native speakers use.

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I hope you enjoyed this lesson.

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And if you want to continue learning how to think in English and speaking like a native, you can join our family.

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All you have to do is go to www.speakenglishwithtiffany.com forward slash native N-A-T-I-V-E

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and continue learning each month how to think in English and how to speak like a native speaker.

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I'll talk to you in the next lesson.

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Thank you.

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FOR YOU

이 레슨의 어휘와 말하기 포인트

이 B2 수준 말하기 레슨은 영상 “Think In English With Me”을(를) 바탕으로 합니다. 가장 자주 반복되는 단어는 다음과 같습니다: native, speaker, English, learner, response. 이 영상에는 섀도잉할 문장 463개와 단어 4108개가 있습니다. 말하는 구간의 길이는 29:49입니다. 화자는 분당 약 138단어의 일정한 속도로 말해서 섀도잉하기에 편한 속도입니다. 단어의 87%가 영어에서 가장 많이 쓰이는 3,000단어에 속해 어휘가 쉬운 편입니다.

이 영상의 핵심 어휘

영상에서 가장 어려운 단어 15개를 발음, 뜻과 함께 정리했습니다.

단어	발음	뜻
learner 명사	/ˈlɜɹnəɹ/	학습자
listener 명사	/ˈlɪs(ə)nɚ/	경청자, 청취자
bandwidth 명사	/ˈbændwɪdθ/	대역폭
grammar 명사	/ˈɡɹæm.ə(ɹ)/	Korean: 문법, 문법학
sibling 명사	/ˈsɪb.lɪŋ/	형제, 형제자매
coincidence 명사	/kəʊˈɪnsɪdəns/	일치, 우연의 일치
memorize 동사	/ˈmɛm.əˌɹaɪ̯z/	기억하다, 암기하다
repetition 명사	/ˌɹɛp.əˈtɪʃ.ən/	되풀이, 반복
summarize 동사	/ˈsʌməˌɹaɪz/	요약하다
accusation 명사	/ˌæk.jʊˈzeɪ.ʃ(ə)n/	고발
intentional 형용사	/ɪnˈtɛnʃənəl/	고의적인
screenshot 명사	/ˈskriːn.ʃɑt/	스크린샷, 스샷
roommate 명사	/ˈɹu(m)ˌmeɪt/	동숙인, 룸메이트
narrator 명사	/ˈnæˌɹeɪ.təɹ/	이야기꾼, 내레이터
vocabulary 명사	/vəˈkæb.jə.lə.ɹi/	어휘, 어휘력

영상에 나오는 구동사

단어	뜻
pick up 동사	줍다
bring up 동사	꺼내다

따라 말해 볼 만한 문장

영상에 나오는 짧고 완결된 문장으로, 일상 대화에서 그대로 쓸 수 있습니다:

Once you hear it clearly, you can't unhear it.
Person a, how was your new boyfriend?
He's very, why are you looking for problems?
Why are you looking for problems?
Are you close with your family?

이 영상의 문법

화자가 가장 많이 쓰는 문형을 영상 속 실제 표현과 함께 정리했습니다.

문형	영상 속 표현
현재완료진행 have/has been + -ing — 전에 시작해 지금도 계속되는 동작	I've been holding
수동태 be + 과거분사 — 누가 하는지보다 무슨 일이 일어나는지에 초점	was used · was signed · be pulled
현재완료 have/has + 과거분사 — 과거의 일이 지금도 관련이 있을 때	you've studied · You've been · hasn't shown
관계절 who / which + 절 — 사람이나 사물에 대한 추가 정보	Someone who remembers · one who follows

주의할 발음

화자는 don't, we're, I've 같은 축약형과 약화된 형태를 71번 사용합니다. 들리는 대로 짧게 발음하세요.

“th” 소리: bandwidth /ˈbændwɪdθ/, underneath /ˌʌndɚˈniθ/, sympathy /ˈsɪm.pəθ.i/
“sh”와 “zh” 소리: hesitation /ˌhɛzɪˈteɪʃən/, unintentional /ˌʌnɪnˈtɛnʃənəl/, abstraction /æbˈstɹæk.ʃn̩/, memorization /ˈmem(ə)ɹaɪˌzeɪʃn̩/, repetition /ˌɹɛp.əˈtɪʃ.ən/
긴 단어 — 강세 위치에 주의: hesitation /ˌhɛzɪˈteɪʃən/, unintentional /ˌʌnɪnˈtɛnʃənəl/, coincidence /kəʊˈɪnsɪdəns/, accusingly /əˈkju.zɪŋ.li/, memorization /ˈmem(ə)ɹaɪˌzeɪʃn̩/

한국어 화자가 어려워하는 소리:

/f/ — ㅍ(/p/)으로 바꾸지 말고 윗니를 아랫입술에 대기: drift /dɹɪft/, confession /kənˈfɛʃən/, freeze /ˈfɹiːz/
/v/ — ㅂ(/b/)과 구별하기: visualize /ˈvɪʒuəˌlaɪz/, vocabulary /vəˈkæb.jə.lə.ɹi/, dive /daɪv/
/z/ — ㅈ이 아니라 성대를 울리는 /s/: hesitation /ˌhɛzɪˈteɪʃən/, accusingly /əˈkju.zɪŋ.li/, memorization /ˈmem(ə)ɹaɪˌzeɪʃn̩/, memorize /ˈmɛm.əˌɹaɪ̯z/, summarize /ˈsʌməˌɹaɪz/

이 영상으로 연습하는 방법

먼저 말하지 않고 영상을 끝까지 듣고 모르는 단어를 적어 둡니다.
보통 속도로 한 문장씩 섀도잉하고, 화자의 리듬과 맞을 때까지 반복합니다.
자신의 목소리를 녹음해 원본과 비교하고, learner, listener, bandwidth 같은 단어에 특히 주의합니다.

쉐도잉이란? 영어 실력을 빠르게 키우는 과학적 방법

쉐도잉(Shadowing)은 원래 전문 통역사 훈련을 위해 개발된 언어 학습 기법으로, 다언어 학자인 Dr. Alexander Arguelles에 의해 대중화된 방법입니다. 핵심 원리는 간단하지만 매우 강력합니다: 원어민의 영어를 들으면서 1~2초의 짧은 지연으로 즉시 소리 내어 따라 말하는 것——마치 '그림자(shadow)'처럼 화자를 따라가는 것입니다. 문법 공부나 수동적인 청취와 달리, 쉐도잉은 뇌와 입 근육이 동시에 실시간으로 영어를 처리하고 재현하도록 훈련합니다. 연구에 따르면 이 방법은 발음 정확도, 억양, 리듬, 연음, 청취력, 말하기 유창성을 크게 향상시킵니다. IELTS 스피킹 준비와 자연스러운 영어 소통을 원하는 분들에게 특히 효과적입니다.

섀도잉 방법: 단계별 전체 가이드 읽기 →

쉐도잉 연습: Think In English With Me | Episode 2: “Relationships“ - 영상으로 영어 말하기 배우기

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이 레슨의 어휘와 말하기 포인트

이 영상의 핵심 어휘

영상에 나오는 구동사

따라 말해 볼 만한 문장

이 영상의 문법

주의할 발음

이 영상으로 연습하는 방법

쉐도잉이란? 영어 실력을 빠르게 키우는 과학적 방법