Shadowing Practice: How to be Alone Without Feeling Lonely + Tips for Moving Abroad - Learn English Speaking with Video
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I spend a lot of time alone and I prefer it that way.
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Hey guys, it's Leah.
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I'm an American living in China for the time being
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and I like to share parts of my life with you guys on this channel
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and recently I've been getting a lot of comments and questions asking if I miss home,
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if I'm homesick, or if I feel lonely because I spend most of my time alone.
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These are all valid questions.
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So I thought I would give you guys some advice on how to be alone without being lonely
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and also give some advice for those who are curious about moving abroad no matter what the country is
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but feel a little bit nervous.
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The first thing is to get rid of outside voices.
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You need to stop caring about how you think other people are going to perceive you
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or how you think other people think about you
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because honestly other people don't think about you that much
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if at all so you don't really need to worry about what other people think
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if you go out to a restaurant alone
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if you go to watch a movie alone nobody is thinking
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about you you are the only person thinking about yourself second you really need some hobbies you need things
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that you can work on alone personally
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I have a lot of hobbies for example I like to read I like to do puzzles
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while I listen to podcasts I like to draw
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and paint all of these things are things I can do alone
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and it also helps me to recharge third
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you have to get comfortable in your own skin like you basically need to learn how to love yourself
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and that sounds really cheesy like I'm sure you've heard
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that a million times by now and it's kind of lost its meaning
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but what mean by this is that you have to learn how to accept yourself instead of trying to constantly change yourself.
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For me, I'm very introverted.
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I'm not very social.
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I don't have many friends, which is why I spend most of my time alone.
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There was a point of time where I felt pretty insecure about this because I would see other people going out,
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going to parties, being really social, and having this huge group of friends.
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And I just was wondering what was wrong with me like why don't I have
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that kind of lifestyle but the truth is I'm just like not
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that kind of person so when I accepted who I was
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and stopped trying to force myself to become someone else
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I felt a lot more happier my next tip is you can focus on a mindset shift
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so instead of thinking oh my god I'm
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so embarrassed to be here alone this is so awkward and
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so embarrassing you can think wow
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it's really such a privilege for me to have the opportunity to do this all on my own.
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This is something I realized after years of experience of feeling down about myself
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or feeling sad in different moments where I was alone.
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I just realized if I changed my outlook
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and changed my mindset on how I perceive myself and how I perceive that moment,
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I can actually make myself feel happier and I can actually appreciate my own company a lot more.
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Another tip I have is that you should keep a journal
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and I know a lot of people talk about journaling
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but I don't think it has to necessarily be writing things down on paper or a traditional kind of journal or diary.
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I just think that
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if you're spending a lot of time alone then you should still be practicing the way that you express your thoughts.
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So it could be writing things on paper, but it could also be, you know, setting up your phone and talking for a few minutes
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or doing something else to kind of log your thought processes and,
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you know, get out all of the emotions that are just pent up inside of you.
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It's just one way of expressing yourself without an audience.
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Now, if you're thinking about moving abroad but feel nervous
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and you have this fear of the unknown
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then i'm gonna share some of my own advice based on my own experience
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i've gone abroad a few times totally on my own
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and at first it can be very daunting it can feel scary
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but once you do it the first time it gets a lot easier the more
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that you do it and this leads to my first tip for this segment which is just do it.
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Don't let fear get in the way of your dreams and your ambitions.
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I know so many people who really want to go abroad,
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and they really have this life imagined in their head that they would like to live,
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but they stay in their hometown because they're afraid of not knowing anybody.
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They're afraid of learning a new language, afraid of making new connections and starting over, but it's really not as scary as you think.
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I actually think it's more scary to not do something you really want to do because you're afraid.
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Similarly, don't let other people make decisions for you.
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If you're young and you haven't settled down yet and you're not married, you don't have kids yet,
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and you have the opportunity and the finances to go abroad for even a short period of time,
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there really shouldn't be anything that stops you if you really want to do this.
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You shouldn't let other people's opinions stop you from doing what you want to do.
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I know some people really care about how their parents think of them
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or their parents have a huge say in what they do we can respect our parents
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and value their opinions while still chasing our dreams it's really possible
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and sometimes you just have to do it regardless of what they say personally
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i have people in my family who were really worried about me
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when i said i wanted to go abroad or
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when i told them
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that i was going i wasn't asking permission I was saying hey I'm going to China
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and some of them were worried just because it's so far away
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or I don't know many people here
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but I'm okay I've been here for a
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while now like everything gets sorted out you just have to trust yourself
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and that also brings us to our next point
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which is you should do some groundwork first before jumping into an opportunity to go abroad
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and this also connects to how to be okay with being alone
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because you should be okay with spending time on your own.
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If you go abroad, there are going to be
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so many times where you're totally alone and you have to trust yourself
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and gain experience in doing things alone and relying on yourself so that when you go abroad,
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you're not frantically running around like a chicken with their head chopped off.
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You can still figure things out.
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You have the ability to solve problems because you've done it before.
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Lastly if you want to go abroad I would say trust your intuition but also push yourself out of your comfort zone.
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So you want to be aware of your surroundings you know don't put yourself into dangerous situations
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and be aware of the people and the environments around you
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but also don't let the fear of the unknown stop you from trying new things.
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You know you still want to put yourself out there talk to new people
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and do things that make you a little bit uncomfortable.
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And the more that you do these things, the easier it's going to get for you later on.
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These are just some of the tips
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that I have been thinking of recently as I've been spending a lot of time alone and a lot of time abroad.
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So let me know if you guys have any related tips, anything that I didn't mention in this video,
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leave them in the comments and we can help each other out.
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Vocabulary and speaking notes for this lesson
This speaking lesson is built on the video “How to be Alone Without Feeling Lonely + Tips for Moving Abroad”. This video has 106 sentences and 1378 words to shadow. The speech runs for 7:38. The speaker talks fast, about 181 words per minute, so expect linked and reduced sounds. 87% of the words are among the 3,000 most common in English, so the vocabulary is easy to follow.
Key vocabulary in this video
15 words from the video worth learning, with pronunciation and meaning:
| Word | Pronunciation | Meaning |
|---|---|---|
| abroad adverb | /əˈbɹɔːd/ | Beyond the bounds of a country; in foreign countries. |
| scary adjective | /ˈskɛə.ɹi/ | Causing fear or anxiety |
| perceive verb | /pɚˈsiv/ | To become aware of, through the physical senses, to see; to understand. |
| lonely adjective | /ˈloʊnli/ | Unhappy due to feeling isolated from contact with other people. |
| hobby noun | /ˈhɑ.bi/ | An activity that one enjoys doing in one's spare time. |
| mindset noun | /ˈmaɪn(d)ˌsɛt/ | A way of thinking; an attitude or opinion, especially a habitual one. |
| necessarily adverb | /ˌnɛs.əˈsɛɹ.ə.li/ | Inevitably; of necessity. |
| regardless adverb | /ɹɪˈɡɑɹd.lɪs/ | Without attention to warnings or indications of bad consequences. |
| curious adjective | /ˈkjʊɹ.i.əs/ | Tending to ask questions, or to want to explore or investigate; inquisitive; (with a negative connotation) nosy, prying. |
| chase verb | /t͡ʃeɪs/ | To follow at speed. |
| solve verb | /sɒlv/ | To find an answer or solution to a problem or question; to work out. |
| comfort noun | /ˈkʌm.fət/ | Contentment, ease. |
| connect verb | /kəˈnɛkt/ | To join (to another object): to attach, or to be intended to attach or capable of attaching, to another object. |
| pen noun | /pɪn/ | A tool, originally made from a feather but now usually a small tubular instrument, containing ink used to write or make marks. |
| valid adjective | /ˈvælɪd/ | Well-grounded or justifiable, pertinent. |
Phrasal verbs you will hear
| Word | Pronunciation | Meaning |
|---|---|---|
| get out verb | To leave or escape. | |
| go out verb | To leave, especially a building. | |
| run around verb | To be very busy doing many different things. | |
| set up verb | /ˌsɛt ˈʌp/ | To make ready for use. |
| settle down verb | To make or become quiet and calm after a period of disturbance or restlessness. | |
| sort out verb | To clarify by reviewing mentally. | |
| start over verb | to begin again; to return to the beginning |
Grammar in this video
The structures the speaker uses most, with the exact words from the video:
| Structure | In the video |
|---|---|
| Present perfect continuous have/has been + -ing — an action that started earlier and is still going on | I've been getting · have been thinking |
| Present perfect have/has + past participle — a past action that still matters now | you've heard · i've gone · haven't settled |
| Relative clauses who / which + clause — extra information about a person or thing | those who are · friends, which is · segment which is |
| Advice with “should” should + verb — saying what is a good idea | should keep · should still be · shouldn't be |
Pronunciation to watch
The speaker uses 42 contractions and reduced forms, such as don't, I'm, you're. Say them the short way, as you hear them.
- The “sh” and “zh” sounds: emotion /ɪˈməʊ.ʃən/, ambition /æmˈbɪʃ.ən/, intuition /ˌɪn.tjuːˈɪʃ.ən/
- Long words — get the stress right: necessarily /ˌnɛs.əˈsɛɹ.ə.li/, similarly /ˈsɪm.ə.lə.li/, uncomfortable /ʌnˈkʌm.fɚ.tə.bl̩/, intuition /ˌɪn.tjuːˈɪʃ.ən/, introverted /ˈɪn.tɹəˌvɜːɹ.təd/
How to practise with this video
- Listen to the whole video once without speaking and note the words you do not know.
- Start at 0.75× speed, shadow it sentence by sentence, then go back to normal speed once it feels easy.
- Record yourself and compare with the original, paying attention to words like abroad, scary, perceive.
What is the Shadowing Technique?
Shadowing is a science-backed language learning technique originally developed for professional interpreter training and popularized by polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. The method is simple but powerful: you listen to native English audio and immediately repeat it out loud — like a shadow following the speaker with just a 1–2 second delay. Unlike passive listening or grammar drills, shadowing forces your brain and mouth muscles to simultaneously process and reproduce real speech patterns. Research shows it significantly improves pronunciation accuracy, intonation, rhythm, connected speech, listening comprehension, and speaking fluency — making it one of the most effective methods for IELTS Speaking preparation and real-world English communication.