Shadowing Practice: relationships are hard. - Learn English Speaking with Video
Creating lesson...
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So I just broke up with my girlfriend.
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And I'm not going to...
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I'm not asking for pity or support or anything.
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I'm fine.
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But I wanted to talk about this while it was still fresh because
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I think that's when the best time to talk about things is when it's fresh.
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Thank you.
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Relationships are hard.
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You know?
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People, uh...
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People break up and stay together for all kinds of different reasons.
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And in my particular case, I thought it was time to break up. And...
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The good thing is we're on good terms, you know?
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We're still...
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Love each other. But...
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One of us is not there as much as...
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They used to be.
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I'm going to try and spare the details, but...
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It just wasn't the same, you know? And, uh...
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it wasn't the same in a way that you couldn't fix it.
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This wasn't a...
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you know We can sit and talk about this and it'll heal.
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It was a...
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this can't go on any longer because we're going to hate each other type of deal.
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And You know, we both have to accept that.
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You both have to accept this fact for reasons Reasons that life won't tell you. But...
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I wanted to take this opportunity to talk about relationships.
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Relationships are hard, people.
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You need to work at them.
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You need to constantly work and build them.
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Something that didn't happen with mine.
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And I know that now and I've learned from this issue. But, uh...
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You also have to not be afraid to end relationships that aren't working out.
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when there really isn't much that can be done about them when there really isn't much that can be done about it.
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And that is what I believe my case was.
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And I don't know if I already said this, but I'm going to call my girlfriend Velvet so that we can refer to her.
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And Velvet, if you're seeing this, I'm sorry if you've had to somehow manage to get to your recommended page.
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I'm sorry if you have to...
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hear about this second hand But...
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I'm gonna try and have as minimal amount of cuts as possible.
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Thank you.
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I want to keep this as raw and original as possible.
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I think that in general that's a goal with this channel, but in this specific episode, I want it to be real.
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I want it to be so real that...
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You can feel the...
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I guess the pain Because pain is good.
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People don't realize it, but you need pain in your life.
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You need pain to learn and grow from.
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You need pain so that certain things won't hurt later in life or it's just useful for many reasons
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And it's hard for me to cast my thoughts right now.
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Honestly, I'm surprised I'm not tearing up.
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Yeah, if you're in a relationship and you feel that, you know, If you feel that you're unhappy, or if you feel that something's wrong,
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you need to tell your partner.
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And if it's something that If it's something that's so detrimentally wrong that You can't even really tell your partner.
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Something that you really can't tell them because it's just going to hurt their feelings beyond...
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Any other recognition?
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Thank you.
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That's one of the times when you might have to lie a little bit. And...
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Luckily, that's not what happened in my case.
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I didn't have to lie about what happened.
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Or why we broke up.
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which I think is why we're still amicable.
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And still able to talk to each other.
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Is that a witch's hut?
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That is a witch's hut.
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Let's go over there.
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I've been in a few relationships, right?
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This was the only one that was real. And, um...
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I've learned from all of them.
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And what I've learned from the other two is that You shouldn't really...
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let your guard down too quickly.
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Because people don't show who they are until a year after the relationship really is going on.
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Because it really takes that level of time. And, um...
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Effort to find out these things, right?
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You can't just learn who a person is in a day or a month or even three months.
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Because people in the first three months of a relationship usually are still in what's called the honeymoon phase.
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And the so -called honeymoon phase...
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Isn't...
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Thank you.
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It's not a real thing.
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It's not a phase that really can tell.
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It's when people put up their best show.
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Like when girls still wear makeup to bed type of thing.
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When guys are always clean in their houses before...
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You know, they start farting all over the place and leaving the dirty shit.
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all over the floor.
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Yeah.
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So it takes that first three month period.
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And then there's another three months, right?
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And those other three months are where...
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Do I want this cauldron?
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Can I even break this cauldron with...
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I can.
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Okay.
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And then the next three months are a phase of, oh, this person kind of annoys me.
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This person is like...
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Um, This person is giving me multiple icks, as certain girls say.
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And that's fine too.
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You have to go through that phase to see if the things
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that you once thought were cute about this person were now
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just going to annoy the shit out of you for the rest of your life.
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if you're that sort of partner seeker.
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looking for a life partner and then you go into the next three months which Or when you start to realize like,
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okay, I can handle this or this is worth staying with this person for or You know, this is worth X, Y, and Z.
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And I still really love this person for this reason.
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Thank you.
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And you go on, and the list goes on, right?
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And, you know, that's nine months.
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That's nine months at least.
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And of course it's not the same for everybody.
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It can be nine months.
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It can be two years.
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It could be Hell, it could be less.
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The reality is it's going to take time to find out
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what you need about a person before you can make the decision to either stay with them And...
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See if they're the person for you.
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I'm going to die to a spider now because I'm...
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Okay.
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Thank you.
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So when you reach that final point of like the final decision, that you're gonna make of staying with this person or...
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doing to be with this person.
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That's when the relationship really starts.
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Thank you that's when you really start to have the difficult conversations.
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It's when you start to have the, The hard stuff go on. And...
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That's the part where love hurts.
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You know, in my specific case, It had been hurting for a while. Because...
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Thank you.
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For lack of a better...
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way up god I'm gonna die I'm so boned I'm so boned I'm so bound, I'm so bound, I'm so bound.
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Um, Oh no, I'm boned.
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I'm f*ed.
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I'm f*ed.
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I'm so f*ed.
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Wait.
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Oh, you're kidding.
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Oh, you're kidding.
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No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no I guess I'm dead.
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And it reached a point in my relationship, right, where One of us was hurting the other.
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And it was hurting in a way that
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You can't really do anything about it As the party that's hurting the other party.
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The only thing you can do is let them down...
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Slowly or let them down easily rather not slowly And it's hard to be that person.
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It's hard to be the person who's going to be the bad guy in the end.
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We're not necessarily the bad guy, just, you know.
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the one to end it all.
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People don't really ever tell you about that.
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People always talk about it's hard to get broken up with and you'll heal and it'll be okay.
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But no one tells you what it's like to be on the other side of that coin.
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Thank you.
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And the other side of that coin is just as bad.
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if not worse, for people that really care about their partners.
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And that was the truth for me.
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I still love Velvet.
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She's a great person.
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Amazing woman.
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Thank you. But.
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It wasn't going to work out between us, and I could see it.
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And at the time, or right now, she can't see that.
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She doesn't understand it.
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But I have faith that she will.
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I hope that you will.
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And I wish you the best of luck.
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And I was sure...
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I just wish her happiness.
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And that's how you should be, right?
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If you break up with someone, right?
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Unless they were a total piece of garbage to you.
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Unless they like...
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abused you emotionally or something like that.
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If you're going to let them down, try to be kind.
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Try to be nice to them.
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Because at the end of the day, this was a person that you spent a good, significant part of your time with for a certain amount of years or months or whatever.
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And this person may or may not have loved you, you know?
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If you're going to rip their heart out, do it kindly.
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as kind as you can be about something like that.
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And if you're on the other side of that coin, you know, if you're the one being broken up with, as I have been a couple of times, Just know that there's going to be something else.
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There's going to be someone else who can either fix your heart Or break it all over again.
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But I think that's the beauty of love and relationships.
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They're unpredictable.
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And they can be fun and painful and good and bad in so many ways.
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And Velvet, if you did happen to find this video and you're still watching, wherever you are at whatever point in your life...
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I, uh...
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I hope you're doing okay. And, uh...
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I hope you're happy.
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Anyway, guys.
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I'm gonna try and find my items, but I won't spare you through the boredom.
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So, uh, goodnight.
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And good luck.
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About This Lesson
In this lesson, we will focus on the experiences and challenges in relationships, as discussed in a recent video. You'll practice speaking and listening skills by exploring emotional themes while engaging in shadowing techniques. By using segments from the video, learners will not only improve their English skills but also gain insights into the complexities of personal interactions. This practical session is perfect for those preparing for the IELTS speaking test or anyone looking to enhance their conversational English in meaningful contexts.
Key Vocabulary & Phrases
- Break up - to end a romantic relationship.
- Good terms - maintaining friendly relations even after parting ways.
- Work at relationships - putting in continuous effort to maintain a partnership.
- Pain is useful - the idea that experiencing difficulties can lead to personal growth.
- Not afraid to end relationships - the courage to recognize when to let go of a partnership that isn't working.
- Fresh perspective - discussing topics while feelings and thoughts are still new and raw.
- Heal - the process of recovering emotionally from difficulties.
- Learning from experiences - understanding what past situations can teach us for the future.
Practice Tips
As you engage in this lesson, use the shadowspeaks method to enhance your learning experience. Start by listening to short clips of the video and repeating them aloud. The speaker's tone and emotion are particularly powerful in this transcript, so pay close attention to not only the words but also the way they are expressed. For better results:
- Start slowly: Initially, listen to the speaker at a slower pace. This will help you grasp the pronunciation and intonation better.
- Focus on emotion: Terms like “pain” and “good terms” carry significant emotional weight. Try to express these feelings in your repetitions.
- Record yourself: After practicing, record your shadowing attempts and listen back to identify areas for improvement.
- Mix and match: Create your own sentences using the key vocabulary to explore personal experiences, making your practice relevant.
Use this shadowing technique to not only improve your IELTS speaking practice but also to connect more profoundly with the storytelling of the English language. By learning English with YouTube videos like this one, you'll find both inspiration and practical skills to navigate challenging topics confidently.
What is the Shadowing Technique?
Shadowing is a science-backed language learning technique originally developed for professional interpreter training and popularized by polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. The method is simple but powerful: you listen to native English audio and immediately repeat it out loud — like a shadow following the speaker with just a 1–2 second delay. Unlike passive listening or grammar drills, shadowing forces your brain and mouth muscles to simultaneously process and reproduce real speech patterns. Research shows it significantly improves pronunciation accuracy, intonation, rhythm, connected speech, listening comprehension, and speaking fluency — making it one of the most effective methods for IELTS Speaking preparation and real-world English communication.