Shadowing Practice: The Top 10 Worst Decisions You Can Make in Your 20s - Learn English Speaking with Video
Creating lesson...
1
your 20s are perhaps the most important years of your life it is a decade where you try
2
and fail where notoriously people feel lost
3
and unsure about what they want to do in their life
4
and all of that i think is good and part of it
5
but this video i want to talk about the 10 ways
6
that you could really mess up your 20s
7
that can hurt you down the line and i think the most obvious one
8
that people most likely think of is you don't want to
9
accidentally have a kid with some random girl that's not planned um you know
10
that kind of goes without saying here i want to talk about 10 active decisions
11
that you're doing on a consistent basis throughout your 20s
12
and the first one has to be waiting to feel ready right
13
because most people tend to delay everything in life
14
because they they feel like they need to wait until they're confident
15
and then they can start but that's not how life works.
16
You try something, you're completely unsure of what you're doing, you learn from that failure, and then you just continue.
17
You move forward, right?
18
And you do this over and over again to where slowly
19
but surely your confidence builds and so does your skill set along with it.
20
And a lot of people, I feel like their 20s disappear while they're in this sort of preparing phase, right?
21
There's a passage in the Bible that I love that says, the farmer that waits to cultivate his crops until the perfect season will never plant a seed
22
it's so true i've experienced this in even like smaller pursuits
23
that i've done in my life i'm sure you know the same thing to be true in your experience
24
but you can waste years of your life overthinking very simple
25
decisions you just need to don't overthink it just act and learn after
26
the second biggest thing
27
and this is really relatively new do not live your life
28
mainly online social media will create this illusion of progress you know
29
and an illusion of connection you think
30
that you are you know a part of a community just
31
because you can go online and you know find people
32
that have similar interests as you now i'm not saying that's necessarily a bad thing
33
but you need to have there needs to be scarcity involved
34
like you can't always be online on these sub forums
35
or you know scrolling and thinking that you're a part of whatever it is
36
because that is not real life there's something
37
that i've talked about on my channel before called success porn and success porn is essentially where you are constantly consuming
38
various types of media that makes you feel like you're going out there
39
and you're working hard like maybe it's a creed edit
40
or you're watching a video of david goggins
41
and he's like you know whatever like cringy thing
42
that he sort of says i don't hate on david goggins
43
but you know whatever like motivational thing
44
that he's saying it gets you amped it gets you going you see somebody that's doing something with their life
45
and and trying something hard
46
and you get literal dopamine rushes from watching someone else do something almost as
47
if you're doing it yourself do not live entirely online many people they know how to perform a personality
48
but they don't know how to live without it
49
or like they don't know how to live like
50
that without a screen so you know maybe online they're like super knowledgeable
51
and they're good at talking and yada yada yada
52
but then in real life these people are not walking the walk it's kind of like those dudes
53
that give advice about about maybe like dating or woman
54
but then in real life they never actually go out
55
and anything because talk is cheap online
56
so yeah do not stay online number three this is a
57
huge one staying around people who kill your energy these are the negative nancies your environment shapes
58
your standards and so negative lazy you know sort of cynical people
59
normalize mediocrity and then you're gonna fall into line with that now i've also talked about this before,
60
where I think that what you consume online is perhaps more important than the people that you hang out with.
61
Cause the average person spends more time online scrolling than they do with their friends.
62
So I think these go one in the same, that kind of goes back with the previous point that I made about living entirely online.
63
You need to be very specific and have standards when it comes to who you're going to spend your time with, because some friendships are just mutual stagnation.
64
And what I mean by mutual stagnation is like you live a certain life and maybe you, you don't feel so good about it.
65
But if someone else lives that same life, then both of you guys are gonna be like, well, we're in this together.
66
And that sort of makes me feel good enough to just keep this up.
67
You want what's called the Michelangelo effect.
68
The Michelangelo effect is when you believe in that person, they believe in you and you both uplift each other and you're both being positive.
69
And it's Thank you.
70
It's overall a net growth for both of you.
71
You're both challenging each other, right?
72
These, I call them energy vampires.
73
There are people that literally have nothing going for them.
74
And like I said before, they're cynical, they're negative, they're lazy.
75
They just are trying to consume your energy because they lack it themselves.
76
And these people will take you down.
77
This is especially true with significant others.
78
If you're looking for a boyfriend or a girlfriend, you need to make sure that this person is positive
79
and uplifting and believes in you and you believe in them and that, you know, you're both fruitful to each other.
80
This is very, very important.
81
Another thing I think, um, my fourth point that's so important is one of the biggest mistakes is
82
that people never question the life that they were told to want.
83
So you have been conditioned by society, by your family, what's normal in your culture.
84
to, as far as like, what career should you pursue?
85
What's the type of life you want to live, right?
86
Do you want to go to school, get an internship and get a nine to five and try to grow the, or, you know, climb up the corporate ladder.
87
Do you want to go to school, but maybe you're not the smartest or like, that's just not your thing.
88
And so you go into trades and you sort of try to build a business.
89
You have to strip yourself of all the conditioning that you've been told.
90
And that's basically been ingrained in you through the school system and through everything else and ask yourself, what do I really want out of life?
91
Because, you know, it was, I believe it was Rockefeller.
92
John D.
93
Rockefeller was the founder of the board of education.
94
And he is literally quoted saying, I'm in the business of building workers, not thinkers.
95
School is designed to just breed like employees that are just like submissive to the system.
96
You know, they just go along with what they're told.
97
And so you have to question yourself.
98
I recommend reading Nietzsche.
99
I think he's probably one of the best philosophers for this.
100
Although many, many philosophers talk about this idea, but Nietzsche like asks you not just as it relates to what you're doing with your life,
101
but also your morals, like what you believe in.
102
You might've heard of the Ubermensch, which is Nietzsche's idea of, you know, someone who self authors their morals and like what they want to do with their life.
103
You need to ask yourself, do I want this thing or do I want other people to see me have it?
104
Or do I want this thing?
105
Or am I just told to want this?
106
You actually ask yourself this question and be very serious with yourself.
107
Because if you just sort of go with the flow, which is the path of least resistance, and no one's going to judge you for it, you might look back when you're 50 and be like,
108
dude, I wish I would have tried at something
109
that I was really passionate about i think this is such a big issue you know you can achieve everything
110
that society told you and you can still want
111
and still feel empty there's a book
112
that i recommend it's a short story you could read it in like one
113
or two sittings it's called the death of ivan illich
114
if i'm pronouncing his last name right
115
but it's by leo tolstoy one of the greatest uh russian classic authors of all time
116
but this book is about this guy who is kind of on his deathbed
117
and he has to come to terms with his life
118
and by society standards you know he lived a good life he made money he contributed to society
119
but at the end of the day he's like realizing
120
that he did not live the life that he wanted to live at all
121
and so because of this you know he felt regret
122
and it was it was very hard for him to come to terms with death
123
and facing this idea of dying in the life that he lived
124
and so you have to truly question now while you're still young even
125
if you're 40 years old i still want you to question even
126
if you're 50 years old i still want you to question this
127
because how do you know where you're going right like how do you know
128
that that is what's right for you quick interruption here guys i am really excited to finally announce something
129
that i've been working on for quite some time now
130
so i get a lot of dms a lot of emails
131
and i read the comments and i realize
132
that a lot of my audience struggles with you know direction or clarity in life?
133
Like, you know, how do I sort of improve my life and start, you know, progressing towards different goals that I have?
134
This seems to be the number one issue.
135
And so I created my own app.
136
This is not sponsored.
137
This is my own app that I've been working on for quite some time with a couple of friends of mine.
138
It is called my future self.
139
It is available in the app store.
140
You can download it today.
141
What this app does, as you know, the title suggests, it helps you to create your dream optimized version of yourself
142
that you want to become in the future right it's a system where you put in your goals
143
that optimize version of yourself and then it generates day -to -day tasks
144
that you need to complete in order to get there
145
and it's gamified you literally are going to every day have to check off the different tasks
146
that you need to complete and it has like a progress bar.
147
uh there's so much like that has gone into this this has been uh something
148
that making for months now and i'm really really proud of it
149
so if you guys want to support and
150
if you also i i truly believe
151
that this is great value i've been using this myself
152
if you want to progress towards your goals and hey
153
if you want to just support your boy out go check
154
it out the link will be in the description uh the
155
the fifth biggest mistake is i see this one way too
156
often way too often especially this is happens a lot in colleges, like kids that are entering their early twenties, right?
157
It's building your identity around validation, right?
158
Trying to look successful becomes more important than actually becoming successful.
159
Trying to look like you're, you enjoy your life is more important than actually enjoying your life.
160
I made a video about this yesterday, but so many people are obsessed with the aesthetics of things with the status
161
or like appearing as cool or nonchalant but at the end of the day
162
when their head touches
163
that pillow they're sitting there like man i'm not really satisfied
164
i'm not really fulfilled i don't actually like my life
165
but their instagram feed is curated with everything they could possibly
166
want do not fall victim to this trap i beg you
167
i beg you the coolest people i've ever met are the ones
168
that oftentimes don't have any social media
169
or they do they don't post on it they're not trying to prove to anyone anything they just live right so
170
when you build your identity around validation what happens is you
171
become a slave to the opinions of others you can't actually
172
operate with with how you truly want also you can never be your your full truest version of yourself
173
because whenever you are yourself naturally you're not going to fit in with the crowd
174
because the crowd is just full of a bunch of fake people
175
so they're going to despise you for being real
176
and this just creates a recurring cycle where you feel rejected
177
and yeah it sucks so don't build your identity around validation start making decisions not for approval
178
but instead for meaning like actually think about the roi of what you're doing am i going to feel better
179
because of this or am i not
180
you know the sixth one of the the sixth biggest mistake excuse me is making comfort your main goal.
181
It's weird.
182
I feel like society is turning into this, like two polar opposites of the spectrum, right?
183
Where the average person either has to make a choice between, do I want like maximum comfort?
184
I'm going to eat junk food, you know, body positivity.
185
I can look however I want.
186
And it's just what makes me feel good in the moment.
187
Or is it the other end, which is like the extreme, like gym bro, hustle culture, bro, like go a hundred percent into self -improvement
188
and that's also a form of slavery because you become a slave to the improvement itself
189
these things are both losing games but i think comfort is becoming increasingly more popular
190
because what it happens it feels safe when you
191
when you just want to feel comfortable you know you'll take the the corporate job
192
because at least it pays the bills enough to where it's
193
like hey rent's going to be paid for food's going to
194
be paid for life is going to be all right but you know, avoiding difficulty, what I've recognized for myself, at least I can't talk on everyone's behalf,
195
but it creates anxiety, not peace, right?
196
You start to get really uptight about very small things.
197
You start to freak out about going to the airport because you're like, Oh my gosh, what if it doesn't go this way?
198
But the people that constantly are pushing themselves out of their comfort zone, that's a cake.
199
That's a cakewalk.
200
That's a walk in the park.
201
So your twenties are probably the best time I would argue to go out
202
and take a risk because your responsibilities are so much smaller.
203
Like you don't have any real responsibilities in life and you're just sort of, you're, you're free, right?
204
So you got to take those risks because you're also not a, uh, you know, a teenager where you still have to go to school and you still like are,
205
are sort of the, these more formative years of your life where you're trying to figure out what you're going to be,
206
you know, pursuing in your twenties.
207
Although that question doesn't even get answered while you're in your twenties, but like these kids that are still going through school and stuff, you can't take as much risk, but once you're out of school and you can sort of do what you want with your life,
208
boom, that's where, um, in my opinion, you just have the best opportunity to take risk.
209
The, what is it?
210
The seventh?
211
Yeah, i think it's the seventh biggest mistake treating your body
212
like garbage okay take can take care of your body control what you are consuming
213
and your output right and this isn't just talking about the gym
214
and junk food it's also like sleep deprivation it's also you
215
know not moving in general constant simulation um i i think it's important to take care of your body
216
because people act like health only matters when you're older
217
but really your health as an older person is largely contingent upon how you treat yourself through your you know 20s
218
up until you know maybe like 50s 60s right like how
219
are you treating your body every day your mental state becomes heavily tied to your physical condition
220
if you understand this you understand that you know you have to go out
221
and put put in effort and like try things you know
222
uh energy is one of the most underrated advantages in life it's this is how it works
223
and i know this is going to make no sense
224
but this has been my experience the more effort i give the more i get
225
the more that i'm trying in like every day and going out
226
and doing stuff the more energy i have to do things
227
but in periods of time in my life where i haven't
228
been um doing anything with my day i don't go out
229
with friends i don't i i would hardly go to the gym
230
or you know i've had these periods of time in my life
231
and every one small thing becomes so much harder bro it becomes like 10 times harder just to,
232
just to like go and finish a project for school when I'm not doing all these things.
233
But then when I'm really busy, when I feel like I have so much stuff I'm doing out and about during the day.
234
And then all I have is like, maybe like one or two hours at the end of the day, it's like, I can knock out like 20 homework assignments, back to back to back.
235
And it's so much easier, right?
236
So it's about momentum.
237
And so understand that with energy.
238
the eighth biggest issue
239
that i see people run into is you don't learn how
240
to be alone you don't learn how to live without distractions
241
or without you know friends i listen i'm going to be
242
honest i've mastered this guys i i think i've actually gone in too deep with this
243
but learning how to be alone is so important
244
because it teaches you who you truly are you know void
245
of all of these external influences your friends the content you consume all that stuff i consider that um
246
company like even though
247
if you're not in the company of a person physically you can be with them online
248
and that still is going to shape your mentality but
249
if you can just meditate
250
if you can just sit with your thoughts for 30 minutes an hour a day
251
if you can just have the balls to face yourself
252
and the issues that you're that are going on in your life you will be
253
so much better for it you know people act like um relationships substances entertainment all of
254
that stuff is just part of life which to some extent they're right
255
but they think that it's normal and that
256
because of it you don't have to force yourself to be alone
257
because there's such a negative connotation
258
or narrative around an isolated person like oh they're not going to be healthy
259
but really that's where you fortify your mind that's where you establish like your true identity is by yourself
260
and i've been really privileged to spend a lot of time alone
261
and maybe too much to the point where that's like also caused me some mental health issues
262
but at the end of the day when i go out
263
and i do things i know who i am more
264
so than the average person
265
because the average person has just been does whatever uh the five people
266
that they hang out with most do and they never thought of things.
267
Maybe they just went to school, joined a frat, and then they don't think twice.
268
They just become like their sorority sisters or their fraternity brothers.
269
They're not actually thinking.
270
Being alone and being lonely are not the same thing.
271
You can be alone and not feel lonely.
272
This is true.
273
The ninth mistake that I see a lot of people make is thinking that you have unlimited time.
274
In reality, would you rather travel in your 50s
275
or in your 30s you'd probably rather travel in your 30s
276
which means you're gonna have to work hard in your 20s
277
to really enjoy things one of the biggest lies i see
278
so many people say is you have so much time just just go out
279
and try a bunch of different things because you have
280
so much time you can fail well i agree with going out
281
and trying different things but you don't have time
282
because i don't even like like literally think about it like
283
this woman can't really have kids beyond kind of like 35 to 40 range
284
and so if you want to have kids it
285
that that's a big step in your life it's like you have to get things figured out sooner versus later
286
and so you don't really have time but even
287
if you don't want to have kids it's like life is
288
so much more enjoyable while you're young while you have less responsibilities
289
while you are physically capable of like moving around doing these things
290
and also you just have like i feel like young people have a better ability to handle the ups
291
and downs of life because that's just like part of what it is to be young whereas
292
when you're older you know events can have much more major psychological implications on you
293
so yeah don't think that give yourself a narrative in your head
294
that oh my gosh i have unlimited time because you don't you're quietly your 20s quietly build the trajectory of your 30s, 40s, and so on.
295
So there's a quote that I really like that says, you don't figure out what people did in their twenties until they're 30, meaning like things compound over time.
296
So your twenties are going to matter.
297
And you're going to see the results of your twenties while you're, once you hit 30, you know, small daily choices compound massively over time.
298
It's the law of accumulation.
299
The small things that are shown up every day do matter.
300
And the 10th biggest regret that I see people have, or the 10th biggest mistake I see people make is they just avoid meaningful work, right?
301
If you hate your job, if you just constantly hate what you're doing, your life is going to be unfulfilling.
302
Many people love to chase easy dopamine instead of difficult purpose.
303
Like they, they like to go out to the bars.
304
They, they drink, they vape, they do, you know, various indulgent behaviors that are hedonistic and they're not addressing meaning.
305
And really what this is, is a distraction from facing themselves.
306
But if you just face yourself and then you figure out what you want, it allows you to then pursue something more meaningful in your life.
307
Deep work, of course, is going to feel harder now because everyone's attention span is damaged.
308
But at the end of the day, the harder the work, the more meaningful it becomes.
309
Fulfillment usually comes from mastery and not comfort so you know creating something meaningful is going to give your life structure
310
there are obviously many other things
311
but i hope you guys got something important out of this video um and
312
if you want to support me definitely check out my new
313
app my future self i think you guys will really like it thank you for watching
📺 Same Channel
B22
What years of extreme isolation have done to me
Daily ConversationUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B21
Your Lack of Personal Purpose Is Causing Your Romantic Obsession
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
B2How to Kill Every Limiting Belief and Become Unstoppable
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
C11
I've Lived More In My Head Than I've Lived In Real Life
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B23
Lust will destroy you...
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B2WTF happened after 2020?
TeensDaily ConversationHigh School Students
✨ Recommend Video
B26
157 sentences
If you're under 30, please watch this video…
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
B21
299 sentences
You Just Don't Want It Enough.
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B21
138 sentences
Starting art "late" is actually a HUGE advantage | YTartschool
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
B21
216 sentences
Life Lessons Old People WISH Young People Knew
Business EnglishTeensDaily Conversation
B21
276 sentences
Stop wasting your time | Easy English podcast | B1-B2 listening practice
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
B11
321 sentences
10 Weight Loss Mistakes That Kept Me Fat (Until I Fixed Them)
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
B21
221 sentences
BEFORE YOU WASTE ANOTHER YEAR WATCH THIS ||Jim Rohn
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B2136 sentences
Are you making yourself miserable?
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
B2312 sentences
Asking 20 and 30 Year Olds About Their Biggest Regrets in Life
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
B21
247 sentences
20 Cheat Codes I Wish I Knew at 20
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
B23
407 sentences
If You're in Your 20s, Watch This BEFORE It's Too Late
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
B21
281 sentences
How I trained my mind to create instead of consume
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
Vocabulary and speaking notes for this lesson
This B2 speaking lesson is built on the video “The Top 10 Worst Decisions You Can Make in Your 20s”. This video has 313 sentences and 4086 words to shadow. The speech runs for 21:27. The speaker talks fast, about 190 words per minute, so expect linked and reduced sounds. 88% of the words are among the 3,000 most common in English, so the vocabulary is easy to follow.
Key vocabulary in this video
The 15 most advanced words in the video, with pronunciation and meaning:
| Word | Pronunciation | Meaning |
|---|---|---|
| consume verb | /kənˈsum/ | To use up. |
| meaningful adjective | /ˈmiː.nɪŋ.fl̩/ | Having meaning, significant. |
| yada | Only used in yada yada yada | |
| validation noun | /ˌvæl.əˈdeɪ.ʃən/ | The act of validating something. |
| dopamine noun | /ˈdoʊ.pəˌmin/ | A monoamine C₈H₁₁NO₂ that is a decarboxylated form of dopa, present in the body as a neurotransmitter and a precursor of other substances including adrenalin. |
| optimize verb | /ˈɑptɪmaɪz/ | To act optimistically or as an optimist. |
| overthink verb | To think or analyze too much. | |
| stagnation noun | /stæɡˈneɪʃn̩/ | The state of lacking flow or motion, usually causing a lack of freshness or health; (countable) an instance of this. |
| cynical adjective | /ˈsɪnɪkəl/ | Of or relating to the belief that human actions are motivated only or primarily by base desires or selfishness. |
| philosopher noun | /fəˈlɑsəfɚ/ | A lover of wisdom. |
| unsure adjective | uncertain, ambivalent. | |
| distraction noun | /dɪsˈtɹæk.ʃən/ | Something that distracts. |
| scroll noun | /skɹoʊl/ | A roll of paper or parchment; a writing formed into a roll. |
| gosh | /ɡɑːʃ/ | A mild expression of surprise or enthusiasm. |
| illusion noun | /ɪˈl(j)uːʒ(ə)n/ | A distortion of sensory perception where real stimuli lead to a false or misleading impression of reality. |
Phrasal verbs you will hear
| Word | Meaning |
|---|---|
| go out verb | To leave, especially a building. |
| figure out verb | To come to understand; to discover or find a solution; to deduce. |
| check off verb | To mark items on a list (with a checkmark or by crossing them out) that have been chosen for keeping or removal or that have been dealt with (for example… |
| check out verb | To record the departure or withdrawal of someone or something (such as guests, employees, books, etc.). |
| do out verb | To decorate, tidy, or clean (a place). |
| go along with verb | To acquiesce to or comply with a proposal, despite lacking a desire or value for it. |
| go through verb | To travel from one end of something to the other. |
| knock out verb | To strike or bump (someone or something) out. |
Sentences worth repeating
Short, complete lines from the video that you can reuse in everyday conversation:
- It's overall a net growth for both of you.
- You're both challenging each other, right?
- It's building your identity around validation, right?
Grammar in this video
The structures the speaker uses most, with the exact words from the video:
| Structure | In the video |
|---|---|
| Present perfect continuous have/has been + -ing — an action that started earlier and is still going on | i've been working · i've been using |
| Present perfect have/has + past participle — a past action that still matters now | i've experienced · i've done · i've talked |
| Passive voice be + past participle — the focus is on what happens, not who does it | were told · have been conditioned · you've been told |
| Relative clauses who / which + clause — extra information about a person or thing | people who kill · Ubermensch, which is · flow, which is |
Pronunciation to watch
The speaker uses 126 contractions and reduced forms, such as you're, don't, they're. Say them the short way, as you hear them.
- The “th” sounds: deathbed /ˈdɛθˌbɛd/, aesthetics /ɛsˈθɛt.ɪks/, ninth /naɪnθ/, eighth /eɪtθ/
- The “sh” and “zh” sounds: validation /ˌvæl.əˈdeɪ.ʃən/, stagnation /stæɡˈneɪʃn̩/, distraction /dɪsˈtɹæk.ʃən/, gosh /ɡɑːʃ/, illusion /ɪˈl(j)uːʒ(ə)n/
- Long words — get the stress right: validation /ˌvæl.əˈdeɪ.ʃən/, philosopher /fəˈlɑsəfɚ/, unlimited /ʌnˈlɪm.ɪ.tɪd/, connotation /ˌkɑnəˈteɪʃən/, deprivation /ˌdɛp.ɹɪˈveɪʃən/
How to practise with this video
- Listen to the whole video once without speaking and note the words you do not know.
- Start at 0.75× speed, shadow it sentence by sentence, then go back to normal speed once it feels easy.
- Record yourself and compare with the original, paying attention to words like consume, meaningful, yada.
What is the Shadowing Technique?
Shadowing is a science-backed language learning technique originally developed for professional interpreter training and popularized by polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. The method is simple but powerful: you listen to native English audio and immediately repeat it out loud — like a shadow following the speaker with just a 1–2 second delay. Unlike passive listening or grammar drills, shadowing forces your brain and mouth muscles to simultaneously process and reproduce real speech patterns. Research shows it significantly improves pronunciation accuracy, intonation, rhythm, connected speech, listening comprehension, and speaking fluency — making it one of the most effective methods for IELTS Speaking preparation and real-world English communication.