Shadowing Practice: How to Stop Feeling Left Out in English Conversations: Try This Simple Technique - Learn English Speaking with Video

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Do you ever wish you were able to be more active in a conversation?

Maybe you're at lunch and there's a bunch of native speakers nattering away and you can't get a word in edgeways,

so you decide to keep quiet.

Eat your lunch and nod along, showing that you're supposedly taking part in the conversation.

But what if I told you that there are learnable techniques

that you can come away from this video with to enable you to not just get more involved in a conversation,

but actually influence the direction it goes,

meaning you can lead it towards a topic you have an interest in.

I find it quite odd how nobody ever actually teaches us these things.

We just get thrown into socializing as little kids.

And then over years and years, we sort of figure out how to get by.

And most of us miss out on how to be a good conversationalist.

And that leads us to think it's something you have or don't have.

which is really detrimental because it makes those who haven't learned how to be one feel like there's no hope.

I'm not a good conversationalist, so what's the point?

I'll just listen.

Well, I'm here today to challenge that.

We will start with a simple yet powerful technique that many good conversationalists use on a regular basis.

It's something that will help you go from just getting by in a conversation to genuinely having brilliant conversations

so today we're not doing grammar we're not doing vocabulary we're

not doing pronunciation we're not doing culture we're focusing on a technique

that will improve your ability to be active in a conversation

instead of stranded on the edge of it nodding along waiting for a gap

that never comes and I'm going to call it branching out.

OK, so what is branching out?

Let's say if someone gives you a bit of information, the conversation reaches a little pause.

And instead of letting it die there, you take what's been said and you branch off into a related topic,

one that keeps things alive and ideally steers the chat somewhere you actually feel comfortable.

The key word there is the pause because every conversation has these little natural lulls,

these tiny moments where the topics run out of steam and nobody quite knows where to go next.

Most people freeze in that gap.

The branching out person, though,

they see it as their moment that that pause is the invitation for them to intervene or branch out.

And I'd say it's a bit like a muscle.

You know, the first few times you do it, if it's if it's a new technique to you, it will feel clunky and slow.

But stick with it and it will become second nature.

Now, the best way to show you this is to actually watch it happen.

So I want you to meet three fictitious friends.

There's Tom and Sophie, who between them could talk for England, meaning they could talk a lot for a long period of time.

And then there's Alex, who's a bit quieter, the one hovering slightly outside the chat,

wanting to join in, but never quite finding the door.

Alex is the one we're rooting for today, rooting for, supporting, wanting to do well.

So we're going to watch one single evening in one single

pub first we'll watch it go wrong for alex then we'll rewind

and watch alex take control of the exact moment in five

different ways all right let's set the scene we're in a

pub a quaint quintessentially english pub um three drinks are on the table

and tom and sophie are mid -flow and tom's saying

you know maybe he's looking at his phone he says i

swear my screen time went up again this week five hours

a day five then sophie says don't mine said the same

and i nearly threw the bloody thing in the bin then

tom says it's the scrolling you pick it up to check one thing

and 40 minutes later you've forgotten what you were there for Let's go.

Sophie says.

I know every single time.

I keep saying I'll do something about it.

Right.

Excuse the terrible acting.

But that is a moment where a natural little pause comes in.

The topics run its course.

The gap is kind of widening.

And Alex, who hasn't said anything yet, just sits there.

OK, just we do we we do this, meaning twiddling your thumbs.

So Alex doesn't say anything.

And then after a moment, Tom naturally fills the space by saying, oh, that reminds me.

Did you see Jenny's post from the weekend?

And then Sophie says the Ibiza one yeah how is she affording that

and Tom says third holiday this year it was the same

villa we stayed in remember Sophie says oh the one with

that awful neighbor Tom says oh my god he complained every single night didn't he

and they're off okay deep into a holiday Alex wasn't on

a neighbor Alex never met Alex opens their mouth once can't find a way in

and quietly loses it again Then five minutes later, Alex is just there holding a pint, nodding along to a story that has nothing to do with him.

So let's talk about what just happened, because it's not that Tom and Sophie were rude.

They weren't.

The problem is simpler than that.

That pause didn't stay empty.

It never does.

Someone always fills it.

And here Tom filled it.

Tom branched straight into territory that he and Sophie shared like a holiday,

an old neighbor or a whole little world that Alex was never part of.

Alex didn't go on that holiday.

And the second that happened, Alex was locked out, really not on purpose, just because the conversation got steered

and Alex wasn't the one doing the steering that's the lesson

hiding in here the pause is is up for grabs whoever grabs it points the conversation wherever they like

so let's do this again and give Alex the wheel

so we've got the same night same pub same two lines from Tom

and Sophie about their screen time you know five hours oh

my god yeah same here I want to do something about it

that thing and then we're going to arrive at

that exact same pause only now Alex is ready

and I'll show you five completely different places Alex could take it all from

that one little gap

so we've got the first branch I'm going to call the personal branch you you take the big general topic

and bring it down to the actual humans in the room okay let me explain

so the last line of

that little dialogue Sophie said every time I keep saying I'll do something about it right and then there's a pause

100

and then Alex comes in with do you um do you scroll

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when you're going to bed like last thing at night Sophie

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says oh yeah I've started leaving it in the kitchen now lasted about two days though

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and then Tom says I tried

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that then I bought a second charger for the bedroom

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and defeated the whole point and then Sophie says what about you Alex

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and then Alex gets to continue the conversation

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so here Alex pushed the conversation down the personal branch by leaning in on their actual habits

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and notice how it naturally bounced straight back with a question to him it's likely

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that that would happen unless you're conversing with people

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that are just disrespectful if somebody asks a question involves themselves in

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that topic it is much more likely

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that the recipient will then play back a question to them not always not always the case

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but much more likely right

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so that's the first variation before we go on to the second variation

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and we've got five of them coming up um i want you to picture your next dinner maybe

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or work do or chat with someone you've only just met

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and instead of sitting there quietly hoping somebody throws you a

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question you are the one keeping the whole thing alive the

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pauses don't scare you anymore you spot one you branch

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and then the other person walks away thinking I really liked talking to them

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that feeling of never being that that spare part again is is completely learnable as I'm trying to tell you

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And it's a lovely, lovely feeling.

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So I've made you a little something for free to get you there faster.

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Five minutes with it, and you'll walk away with one branch loaded and ready in your own words.

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So the next time a conversation goes quiet on you, you won't freeze.

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You'll just reach for these techniques.

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If you want that, here's how to grab it.

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Scan the QR code on screen right now or

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if you're listening the link is in the description box show notes

130

or comments section and clicking that link will open this screen

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that video podcast viewers can see right now pop your name

132

and email in and it will be in your email inbox straight away

133

but remember to check your your spam

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if it doesn't appear immediately right let's get back to alex and doing the second variation.

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Okay, so let's rewind again.

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And this time, Alex reaches for a timeline branch.

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Okay, so this is what I'm calling the timeline branch, right?

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So you're moving the chat backwards or forwards in time.

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So we've got Sophie's last line.

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Yeah, every time I keep saying I'll do something about it.

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Same pause, but here's the different move.

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Alex then says, do you reckon we were actually happier before all this?

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You know, like pre -smartphone.

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And then Tom responds, God, I used to be so bored on the bus, just staring out the window.

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Then Sophie says, I miss being bored though.

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Honestly, that's a weird thing to miss.

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Alex then can say, yeah, And I swear I had my best ideas come to me when I was actually bored and the conversation continues.

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So the same setup, but different outcome, right?

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Alex branched out using a timeline and was able to reflect on how things were before.

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And now there's a proper thoughtful little chat about boredom and creativity.

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And Alex didn't just join in on this.

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Alex started that.

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So again, you can play to your strengths.

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If you're somebody who likes to reflect on these things, then you can do exactly that.

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You can lead or steer the conversation towards that kind of branch, right?

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But that is the second of five.

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So the third one is a culture -based branch

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so let's rewind again same pause

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and you know Sophie says yeah I should really do something about it something like

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that and this time Alex branches sideways across cultures wondering how this looks somewhere else

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which is likely a very useful one for you

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because you're probably interacting with two or more cultures in a conversation

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if you're a non -native speaker of English right

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so we have um Sophie saying yeah every time you know I keep saying I'll do something different

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or I'll do something about it

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and then Alex says do you think it's the same everywhere

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like I heard some schools make the kids hand their phones in at the gate now

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and then Sophie says oh do they that's a brilliant idea actually

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and Tom says my cousin's in Sweden he reckons um nobody

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touches their phone in cafes over there everyone just sits

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and talks sophie says really i'd love that

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or i'd find it terrifying one of the two

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and the conversation continues so again same pause

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but a sideways move this time he's moved it across borders let's say um is it the same everywhere else

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and instantly there's a door open for everyone to pour in

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what they know you know tom's cousin in sweden someone's holiday someone's home country

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and as i said this branch is gold for english learners because it's

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that perfect invitation for the person you're talking to to to

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tell you all about their own world you hand them the floor

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and they feel interesting and you learn something and and then

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if they are a half decent human they will ask you

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about your culture in regards to this topic win -win okay get the idea let's do two more though

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but to recap quickly

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so we had leaning into a personal branch sort of learning more about the individual

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or a timeline branch going backwards or forwards in time

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and then we just had the culture branch so thinking about other cultures and whether different groups of people do different things.

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So the fourth one is I'm going to call the cause and consequence branch.

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So Again, another rewind, same pause.

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Now Alex digs into the why or the what happens next.

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So Sophie says, yeah, every time I keep saying I'll do something about it.

191

And then Alex says, why are they so hard to put down, though?

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It's not an accident, is it?

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Somebody's designed them to be that addictive, haven't they?

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And then Tom says, oh, completely.

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There are whole teams of people whose entire job is keeping you scrolling.

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Sophie then says, that's a little bit sinister when you actually think about it.

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Then Alex might respond by saying, I'm somehow impressed and horrified at the same time.

198

Right.

199

So this time Alex went digging.

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Why is this happening?

201

You know, what's behind it?

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And he looks genuinely curious and thoughtful rather than just nosy towards somebody.

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And you can point it in two directions.

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You go backwards into what's causing it or forwards into where it's all heading.

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Either way, you've turned a flat little observation into a proper little investigation.

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And often people enjoy coming up with their own theory as to why something is how it is.

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But let's go on to the last rewind and the last branch.

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So this time, Alex zooms out, lifting the small thing up to the big idea underneath it um

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so sophie says every time i keep saying i'll do something about it

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and then alex says it's mad though isn't it

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when you actually stop and think about it like we're moaning

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but we've got every song ever recorded

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and basically all the human knowledge sat in our pockets our

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grandparents would have called it witchcraft sophie retorts by saying that's

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true a video called my sister in Sydney this morning for free.

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And Tom says, do you know what?

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When you put it like that, I feel a lot less guilty about my five hours.

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Sophie says, right, maybe we're not addicted.

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Maybe it's just genuinely brilliant.

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So there, Alex took screen time and everyday little moan and found the bigger idea sitting underneath it.

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And what was nice about that was

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that he lifted it somewhere positive in about two seconds

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that the whole table went from grumbling to actually marveling at the idea

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and that's the other little secret of zooming out you you get to choose

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which way you direct it

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and choosing up finding the the wonder rather than the doom

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is often the better option for a nice conversation right now i'd like to say

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that these examples I didn't spend ages on those dialogues right

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so they might not feel totally relatable

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but I think you get the idea of how to think up these different directions

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that you can take a conversation you don't have to just wait

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and let an opportunity come to you if you take action you can steer the conversation.

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So that is my aim for this video.

234

Take action yourself and you can become the person in control of the conversation rather than just sitting there nodding along.

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And the more you do it, the more it becomes second nature

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and you start to see these patterns emerge where you can just take the conversation in different directions more easily.

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But yeah, I'd say what we've just seen was impressive for poor old Alex

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because it was the same three people same pub same lull in the conversation

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and then five completely different conversations all hanging on one small decision from Alex

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and that is the whole power of this you are not sitting there waiting to be handed a turn

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that might never come you're spotting the pause

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and you're deciding where everyone goes next

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so yeah here are your five branches to practice we've got

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the the personal one bring it down to the humans in the room we've got the timeline uh

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so you move it backwards or forwards in time the culture one

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that asks how it works somewhere else in the world and then we've got a cause and consequence.

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So sort of dig into the why or the what next,

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and then we've got the zoom out to find the bigger idea underneath.

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And here's all you actually have to do, really.

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Don't try to juggle all five of them.

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Just pick one of them.

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Just pick one to start.

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Keep it ready.

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Then in your next conversation listen for that pause and

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when it comes instead of freezing branch into

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that one you'll get it wrong sometimes the branch will land a bit flat now and then and that's that's completely fine.

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That's the muscle building.

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Do it a handful of times and I promise it stops feeling like a technique

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and starts feeling like part of you, really.

260

If you want to actually drill this though, right now with different situations, then grab that clever little interactive exercise

261

that I've made for you for free by scanning the QR code on screen now

262

or clicking that link in the description box, show notes or comments section.

263

And if you're looking for a new way to learn English something

264

that you've never quite experienced before then I highly recommend checking out my academy my approach was quite simple

265

but a real game changer if you've ever had one -to -one conversation classes

266

and then after a few months thought hmm am I actually getting better

267

or am I just getting more comfortable

268

and have built up a bit more rapport with this one native teacher

269

or if you've ever bought an online course

270

and lost motivation to actually finish the thing then i think

271

i might have found your new home to actually leveling up your english

272

so um head over to the britishenglishpodcast .com academy to learn

273

more all right that's it for me today i've been charlie the host of british english podcast thanks for watching

274

or listening and see you again next week bye

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אוצר מילים והערות הגייה לשיעור הזה

שיעור הדיבור הזה ברמה C1 מבוסס על הסרטון “How to Stop Feeling Left Out in English Conversations: Try This Simple Technique”. המילים שחוזרות הכי הרבה: alex, conversation, sophie, branch, pause. בסרטון הזה יש 274 משפטים ו-3162 מילים לתרגול Shadowing. הדיבור נמשך 21:32. הדובר שומר על קצב יציב של כ-147 מילים בדקה, קצב נוח לתרגול Shadowing. 85% מהמילים נמצאות בין 3,000 המילים הנפוצות ביותר באנגלית; כדאי ללמוד את השאר לפני שמתחילים.

אוצר מילים מרכזי בסרטון הזה

15 המילים המתקדמות ביותר בסרטון, עם ההגייה והמשמעות שלהן:

מילה	הגייה	משמעות
pause שם עצם	/pɔːz/	אתנח
steer פועל	/stɪɹ/	נוהג, נוהג ב־
neighbour שם עצם	/ˈneɪbɚ/	שָׁכֵן, שְׁכֵנָה
nod פועל	/nɑd/	הרכין
scroll שם עצם	/skɹoʊl/	מגילה, מְגִלָּה
bore פועל	/boɹ/	שִׁעֲמֵם
scan פועל	/skæn/	סָרַק
consequence שם עצם	/ˈkɑn.sɪ.kwəns/	תּוֹצָאָה, הַשְׁלָכָה
boredom שם עצם	/ˈbɔɹ.dəm/	שִׁעְמוּם
converse פועל	/kənˈvɝs/	שׂוֹחֵחַ
witchcraft שם עצם	/ˈwɪt͡ʃkɹæft/	כְּשָׁפִים
pronunciation שם עצם	/pɹəˌnʌn.siˈeɪ.ʃən/	הֲגִיָּה, בִּטּוּי
detrimental שם תואר	/ˌdɛtɹɪˈmɛntəl/	מזיק
sinister שם תואר	/ˈsɪ.nɪ.stəɹ/	מרושע, רשע
addictive שם תואר	/əˈdɪktɪv/	ממכר

Phrasal verbs שתשמעו

מילה	משמעות
check out פועל	בדק
figure out פועל	הֵבִין, מצא תשובה
go up פועל	עָלָה

משפטים שכדאי לחזור עליהם

משפטים קצרים ושלמים מהסרטון שאפשר להשתמש בהם בשיחה יומיומית:

I'm not a good conversationalist, so what's the point?
I keep saying I'll do something about it.
You'll just reach for these techniques.
If you want that, here's how to grab it.
You know, what's behind it?

דקדוק בסרטון הזה

המבנים שהדובר משתמש בהם הכי הרבה, עם המילים המדויקות מהסרטון:

מבנה	בסרטון
הווה מושלם (Present perfect) have/has + past participle — פעולה שקרתה בעבר ועדיין יש לה חשיבות או השפעה עכשיו	haven't learned · what's been said · you've forgotten
סביל (Passive voice) be + past participle — הדגש הוא על מה שקורה, לא על מי שעושה את הפעולה	been said · was locked · be handed
משפטי זיקה (Relative clauses) who / which + clause — מידע נוסף על אדם או דבר	those who haven · somebody who likes

הגייה ששווה לשים לב אליה

הדובר משתמש ב-94 קיצורים וצורות מקוצרות, כמו you're, we're, we've. אמרו אותם בצורה הקצרה, כפי שאתם שומעים אותם.

הצלילים של “th”: underneath /ˌʌndɚˈniθ/, thoughtful /ˈθɔːtfəl/, thumb /ˈθʌm/
הצלילים של “sh” ו-“zh”: conversationalist /ˌkɑːnvɚˈseɪʃənəlɪst/, variation /ˌvɛəɹiˈeɪʃn̩/, fictitious /fɪkˈtɪʃəs/, quintessentially /ˌkwɪntɪˈsɛnʃəli/, socialize /ˈsoʊʃəlaɪz/
מילים ארוכות — שימו לב להטעמה: conversationalist /ˌkɑːnvɚˈseɪʃənəlɪst/, quintessentially /ˌkwɪntɪˈsɛnʃəli/, pronunciation /pɹəˌnʌn.siˈeɪ.ʃən/, detrimental /ˌdɛtɹɪˈmɛntəl/, disrespectful /dɪs.ɹɪˈspɛkt.fəl/

צלילים שדוברי עברית מתקשים בהם:

/w/ — שפתיים מעוגלות, לא /v/: rewind /ɹiːˈwaɪnd/, backward /ˈbækwɚd/, sideways /ˈsaɪdweɪz/, consequence /ˈkɑn.sɪ.kwəns/, quintessentially /ˌkwɪntɪˈsɛnʃəli/
/æ/ — פתוח יותר מה-“אֶ” העברית, לא כמו “a” ב-“cup”: backward /ˈbækwɚd/, scan /skæn/, grandparent /ˈɡɹæn(d)pɛəɹənt/, natter /ˈnætɚ/, rapport /ɹæˈpɔɹ/
/r/ — הלשון לא נוגעת בשום מקום, לא ה-“ר” הגרונית: rewind /ɹiːˈwaɪnd/, steer /stɪɹ/, scroll /skɹoʊl/, bore /boɹ/, variation /ˌvɛəɹiˈeɪʃn̩/

איך לתרגל עם הסרטון הזה

הקשיבו לכל הסרטון פעם אחת בלי לדבר, ורשמו את המילים שאתם לא מכירים.
תרגלו Shadowing משפט אחר משפט במהירות רגילה, וחזרו על כל משפט עד שהקצב שלכם תואם את הדובר.
הקליטו את עצמכם והשוו למקור, תוך תשומת לב למילים כמו pause, steer, neighbour.

מהי טכניקת השאדואינג?

שאדואינג היא טכניקת למידת שפה מבוססת מדע שפותחה במקור להכשרת מתורגמנים מקצועיים ופופולרית על ידי הפוליגלוט ד"ר אלכסנדר ארגואלס. השיטה פשוטה אך עוצמתית: אתה מקשיב לאודיו באנגלית ילידית וחוזר עליו בקול רם מיד — כמו צל העוקב אחרי הדובר עם עיכוב של 1–2 שניות בלבד. בניגוד להאזנה פסיבית או תרגילי דקדוק, שאדואינג מכריח את המוח והשרירים בפה לעבד ולשחזר דפוסי דיבור אמיתיים בו זמנית. מחקרים מראים שזה משפר משמעותית את דיוק ההגייה, האינטונציה, הקצב, הדיבור המחובר, הבנת השמיעה ושטף הדיבור — מה שהופך אותו לאחת השיטות היעילות ביותר להכנה לIELTS Speaking ולתקשורת באנגלית בעולם האמיתי.

טכניקת Shadowing: קרא את המדריך המלא שלב אחר שלב →

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בחר מצב תרגול

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אוצר מילים והערות הגייה לשיעור הזה

אוצר מילים מרכזי בסרטון הזה

Phrasal verbs שתשמעו

משפטים שכדאי לחזור עליהם

דקדוק בסרטון הזה

הגייה ששווה לשים לב אליה

איך לתרגל עם הסרטון הזה

מהי טכניקת השאדואינג?