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1
Hey, look at this.
2
They're lighting the big Christmas tree tonight.
3
Um, that paper's two weeks old.
4
All right, who keeps leaving old newspapers in the trash?
5
I really wanted to take Kathy to this.
6
I can't believe I missed it.
7
Hey, you know, at least you have somebody to miss that stuff with.
8
I hate being alone this time of year.
9
Next thing you know, it'll be Valentine's Day, then my birthday, then bang!
10
Before you know it, they're lighting that damn tree.
11
I want somebody.
12
You know, I want a man.
13
I mean, it doesn't even have to be a big relationship, you know?
14
Just, like, a fling would be great.
15
Really?
16
I didn't think girls ever just wanted a fling.
17
Well, let me tell you something.
18
It's been a long time since I've been flung.
19
Well, I know what I'm giving you for Christmas.
20
You know what?
21
There's some nice guys in my office.
22
You want me to set you up?
23
Yeah.
24
Wait a minute.
25
It's been a long time that I've been single.
26
How come you've never offered this before?
27
Well, I have a girlfriend.
28
I'm happy.
29
So I no longer feel the need to go out of my way to stop others from being happy.
30
Okay.
31
No accountants.
32
No accountants.
33
Oh, and no one from, like, legal.
34
I don't like guys with boring jobs.
35
Oh, and Ross was like what, a lion tamer?
36
Hey.
37
Hey.
38
Hey, how much did you guys tip the super this year?
39
Yeah, we were gonna give 50, but if you guys gave more, we don't wanna look bad.
40
Oh, actually, this year we just made them homemade cookies.
41
And 25 it is.
42
You gave them cookies?
43
Money is so impersonal.
44
Cookie says someone really cares.
45
All right, we're broke, but cookies do say that.
46
I can see that.
47
A plate of brownies once told me a limerick.
48
People, let me ask you something.
49
Were these, uh, funny brownies?
50
Not especially. But you know what?
51
I think they had pot in them.
52
So, you guys, who else did you tip with cookies?
53
Uh, the mailman, the super...
54
Oh, and the newspaper delivery guy?
55
Oh, my God.
56
What?
57
I don't think you're gonna like this.
58
Oh, gosh.
59
Oh, there's a cookie smashed in the sports section.
60
Oh, whoa, Kenny did my crossword puzzle.
61
Yeah, but not very well unless 14 Across Gershwin musical actually is Bite Me, Bite Me, Bite Me, Bite Me.
62
Let me ask you, why is everybody using these tiny little lights nowadays?
63
I remember when people used to use big lights.
64
That's a good story, Grandpa.
65
Hey.
66
Hey.
67
Hey.
68
Wow.
69
Monica's letting other people help decorate her tree.
70
Did someone get her drunk again, or...?
71
Having a perfectly decorated tree is not what Christmas is about.
72
It's about being with the people that you love.
73
That is nice.
74
And we're done.
75
Ta-da!
76
I don't know what it is.
77
It just doesn't quite feel like Christmas to me.
78
Oh, yeah.
79
See, now it feels like Christmas.
80
Okay, okay, here's a good one of us.
81
Wow, that is a good one.
82
Wow, it looks like a holiday card, you know, with the tree in the middle and the skaters and the snow.
83
You know, every year I say I'm gonna send out holiday cards and I never do it.
84
Do you wanna send this one out together?
85
Together?
86
Like, to people?
87
Yeah, you know, happy holidays from Mona and Ross.
88
It'll be cute, okay?
89
Okay.
90
Oh, I gotta get to work.
91
So call me later?
92
Oh, sure, sure.
93
Bye, guys.
94
Bye.
95
Congratulations, you just got married.
96
No, can you believe that?
97
Wait, I'm sorry.
98
What's the big deal about a holiday card?
99
Married couples send out cards.
100
Families send out cards.
101
People who've been dating for a couple of months do not send out cards.
102
Like, what, is she crazy?
103
Hey, hey, hey, hey, that's your wife you're talking about.
104
Airplane, airport.
105
Airport 75.
106
Airport 77.
107
Airport 79.
108
Yep, time's up.
109
Bye, bye, birdie.
110
That's a bird.
111
That's a bird.
112
Okay, okay, it's my turn.
113
Go.
114
Uh, Bean.
115
Bean.
116
The unbearable likeness of Bean.
117
Yes! That you get.
118
That you get.
119
Hey.
120
Hey.
121
What are you doing here?
122
Well, I thought a lot about what you said, and I realized, maybe I was a little judgmental.
123
Yeah.
124
Oh, but, um...
125
Now, Phoebe, remember, hey, they're just fulfilling their Christmas...
126
Destiny.
127
Yes.
128
Okay.
129
Yikes, that one doesn't look very fulfilled.
130
Oh, that's, uh, that's one of the old ones.
131
He's just taking it to the back.
132
You keep the old ones in the back?
133
That is so ageist.
134
But we have to make room for the fresh ones.
135
So what happens to the old guys?
136
Well, they go into the chipper.
137
Well, I have a feeling that's not as happy as it sounds.
138
Yes!
139
Yes!
140
Hey, hey, hey.
141
Okay, and this one here's a Douglas fir.
142
Now, it's a little more money, but you get a nicer smell.
143
Looks good.
144
I'll take it.
145
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
146
No, no, no. You don't want that one.
147
No, you can have this cool brown one.
148
It's almost dead.
149
Okay, but that's why you have to buy it.
150
So that it can fulfill its Christmas destiny.
151
Otherwise, they're gonna throw it into the chipper.
152
Tell them, Joey.
153
Yeah, the trees that don't fulfill their Christmas destiny are thrown in the chipper.
154
I think I'm gonna look around a little bit more.
155
Peeps, you gotta stop doing this.
156
I'm working on commission here.
157
Hey, guys.
158
I'm here to pick out my Christmas tree.
159
Well, look no further.
160
This one's yours.
161
Ah.
162
Is this the one that I threw out last year?
163
All right, you know what?
164
Never mind.
165
Everybody wants to have a green one.
166
Sorry.
167
I'm sorry.
168
I didn't mean to get so emotional.
169
I guess it's just...
170
the holidays are just hard.
171
Oh, honey.
172
Is that because your mom died around Christmas?
173
Oh, I wasn't even thinking about that.
174
Oh.
175
Ah, seeing that drunk Santa wet himself really perked up my Christmas.
176
Oh, my God!
177
Merry Christmas!
178
You saved him!
179
Oh, my God!
180
Oh, God, you're the best!
181
It's like Night of the Living Dead Christmas tree.
182
Hey, what are you guys doing?
183
Making holiday candy for the neighbors.
184
I'm sorry, who?
185
I'm gonna hang this basket on the door, and then when the neighbors walk by, they can all take a piece.
186
But we don't know the neighbors.
187
I do.
188
There's, uh, let's see, a guy with a mustache.
189
Smokes a lot lady.
190
Some kids I've seen.
191
And a red-haired guy who does not like to be called Rusty.
192
See, this is exactly why I'm making this candy.
193
We can learn their names and get to know our neighbors.
194
Wouldn't it be easier if we just moved?
195
Oh!
196
Oh!
197
Excuse me, ma'am.
198
Yes.
199
You can't put your cigarette out on a tree.
200
Yeah, I can.
201
It worked real well.
202
No, but you shouldn't.
203
So don't ever do that again.
204
I won't.
205
Until I have my next cigarette.
206
Hold it.
207
NYPD freeze, punk.
208
What?
209
That's right.
210
You are so busted.
211
Book him.
212
Who are you talking to?
213
Save it, Red.
214
Unless you want to spend the night in the slammer, you apologize to the tree.
215
I am not going to apologize to a tree.
216
You apologize to the tree right now, or I am calling for backup.
217
Backup!
218
Backup!
219
I'm sorry!
220
Sorry!
221
Okay, cancel backup!
222
Cancel backup!
223
Hi.
224
Hi, I'm Sandy.
225
Sandy, hi.
226
Come on in.
227
Hey.
228
You brought your kids?
229
Yeah, that's okay, right?
230
You know, when I saw you at the store last week, it was probably the first time I ever mentally undressed an elf.
231
Wow, that's, uh, dirty.
232
Yeah.
233
Hey, kids.
234
Ten blocks down.
235
Five to go.
236
Oh, wait.
237
Stop, stop, stop.
238
Oh, I'm sorry.
239
Do you need a break?
240
My boot's in tan.
241
Hey, can you get a little closer so I can see the price?
242
I can see it from right here.
243
It'll cost you one husband.
244
Okay, I'm sorry.
245
I think I can walk the rest of the way now.
246
Just give me my boots.
247
I don't have your boots.
248
Well, I don't have them either.
249
Where are they?
250
Well, why don't you check in one of my saddlebags while I chew on a bale of hay?
251
Okay.
252
Good.
253
Well, we gotta go back and get them.
254
Honey, are you seriously ever gonna wear the boots again?
255
Okay, I'm never gonna wear them again.
256
I just didn't get a chance to say goodbye.
257
You know what?
258
You can say goodbye to the Tantalins.
259
Okay.
260
All right.
261
Okay.
262
Bye, Boots.
263
Wait!
264
Half off!
265
I'm excited.
266
I just set Rachel up with the worst guy tonight.
267
All right.
268
Who is he?
269
Well, it's this guy I used to massage.
270
And by massage, I mean hold down so he wouldn't turn over and flash me.
271
Okay, okay.
272
Wait till you hear who I got for Ross.
273
Oh, yeah.
274
Okay, she's this really boring woman.
275
She's a teacher.
276
A teacher?
277
Yeah, yeah, she's really into history and foreign movies.
278
Oh, oh, and she loves puzzles, huh?
279
Come on, who loves puzzles?
280
Well, Ross does.
281
What, you're ruining the plan.
282
Joey, you fixed him up with his perfect woman.
283
Oh, my God, you're right.
284
Yeah.
285
She even reads for pleasure.
286
Oh, gosh, it's hot in here.
287
Rach, get the heat.
288
Ross, can you turn the heat down, please?
289
Sure.
290
By the way, there's a difference between being obsessive...
291
Ross, the heat.
292
Fine, okay.
293
Heat, heat, heat, and I'm the obsessive one.
294
Okay, this way is on, so this is...
295
off.
296
Did you just break the radiator?
297
No. No, I was turning the knob, and here it is.
298
Well, put it back.
299
It, uh, it won't go back.
300
Call the super.
301
Here, let me try.
302
Oh, oh, that's right.
303
I forgot about your ability to fuse metal.
304
Hey, it's funny's cousin.
305
Not funny.
306
Hi, Mr. Trigger.
307
Hi, it's Rachel Green from upstairs.
308
Yes, somebody broke our knob on the radiator, and it's really hot in here.
309
Yes, it's hot enough to bake cookies.
310
Well, do you think we could have a new one by 6?
311
What?
312
No, no, Tuesday.
313
We can't wait until Tuesday.
314
We're having a party tonight.
315
Okay, tip the man.
316
No, if he doesn't like our cookies too bad, I'm not gonna be blackmailed.
317
Look, if worse comes to worse, it gets a little warm, we'll call it a theme party.
318
Hey, here's a theme.
319
Come on in.
320
Live like bacon.
321
Mr. Trigger, here is 50 bucks.
322
Merry Christmas.
323
Oh, wow.
324
I didn't get you anything.
325
Here's five back.
326
No, no. No, that's your Christmas tip.
327
Oh, hey.
328
Do you think there's a chance you can fix that radiator now?
329
No can do.
330
Like I told the girl.
331
I gotta get a new knob until Tuesday.
332
Ross?
333
Yeah?
334
Looks like he's playing baseball.
335
You mean hardball?
336
Whatever.
337
Whatcha gonna do?
338
Excuse me.
339
I'm seizing.
340
Mr. Traeger?
341
Here's another 50.
342
Happy Hanukkah.
343
Will, uh, will this help with the knob getting?
344
No. The place is not open till Tuesday.
345
Am I not saying it right?
346
So, wait, you really did like my cookies?
347
Oh, yeah.
348
They were so personal.
349
Really showed you cared.
350
Oh, holy crap, is it hot in here.
351
That's not someone that I would be attracted to.
352
But right now, with the way I'm feeling, All I want to do is rip off his sweatpants and fanny pack.
353
Wait a second.
354
This is about the fourth month of your pregnancy, right?
355
Yeah.
356
This is completely normal.
357
Around the fourth month, your hormones start going crazy.
358
Really?
359
So this has happened to you?
360
Oh, absolutely, yeah.
361
Oh, and keep in mind now, I was carrying triplets.
362
So, you know, in medical terms, I was thrice as Randy.
363
Wow, this explains so much.
364
Last weekend, I went from store to store sitting on Santa's laps.
365
Yeah, yeah, I remember trying to steal a cardboard cutout of Evander Holyfield from a footlocker.
366
Ugh, yeah, ugh.
367
Well, you know what?
368
I go see my doctor tomorrow.
369
I'll ask her about this.
370
Maybe she can give me a pill or something.
371
Yeah, yeah, that's what you need, a good pill.
372
Hey, everybody at work loved you last night.
373
Really?
374
And they like me more just because I was with you.
375
I think you repaired a lot of the damage from when they met Joey.
376
And Doug wants us to play tennis with him.
377
He's never even talked to me outside of work.
378
Except for that time when we bumped into each other at that strip club.
379
Strip church.
380
Anyway, I'm gonna go try to find a racket.
381
Hey, I thought you already had one.
382
Oh, I used to, but then Joey thought it'd be fun to go to Central Park and hit rocks at...
383
bigger rocks.
384
Hey, Rach, do you have a tennis racket?
385
Oh, um, you know, I lent it to Joey, and I've never actually gotten it back.
386
Okay, good luck with that.
387
I can't believe you let them win.
388
Yeah, at least you hid your feelings well about it.
389
I was frustrated.
390
It was my racket.
391
I was frustrated with you.
392
If you hadn't lost the game, they would never have invited us to dinner tomorrow night.
393
You know what really bothers me?
394
It's how different you act around them.
395
I mean, you know, the throwing the tennis games, the fake laugh, the, See you later, Bing!
396
Not if I see you first, Doug!
397
Ah-ah-ah-ah!
398
I gotta tell you, I don't like work, Chandler, okay?
399
The guy's a suck-up.
400
Okay, you know what?
401
Because you said that?
402
I'm not putting out tonight.
403
But seriously, I strongly believe that we should all support President Clinton.
404
And her husband, Bill.
405
Nya-ha-ha-ha!
406
So, how do you kids like your coffee?
407
Oh, none for me, thanks.
408
Ah, just a little bit of sugar.
409
Well, maybe I'll bring it out and have Monica stick her finger in it.
410
That ought to sweeten it up, huh?
411
How does that laugh not give you a headache?
412
Oh, you get used to it.
413
You know, I don't think that I can.
414
So if you don't mind, maybe this will be it for me on the work things.
415
So I laugh at my boss's jokes.
416
What's the big deal?
417
I'd rather not hang out with this sniveling work weasel guy
418
when I could be hanging out with my boyfriend boyfriend who I actually respect.
419
Oh.
420
Uh, I gotta apologize for Kara's coffee, you know?
421
I feel sorry for it if it ever got in a fight.
422
She's not strong enough to defend itself.
423
See what I said, Bing?
424
What?
425
It's a joke, Bing.
426
What's the matter with you?
427
Well, I-I just didn't think it was funny, sir.
428
Excuse me?
429
Well, I just...
430
Honey, I just don't think that you understood the joke.
431
Really?
432
Yeah, I mean, it was really funny.
433
I just don't think that you got it.
434
You see, Kara's coffee is weak-tasting.
435
Okay, but what Doug did was implied that it was weak physically.
436
You get it now, honey?
437
I think I do.
438
I went to a store, sat on Santa's lap, Asked him to bring my friends all kinds of crap
439
Said all you need is to write them a song Now you haven't heard it yet,
440
so don't try to sing along Or don't sing along Monica,
441
Monica Have a happy Hanukkah Saw Santa Claus He said hello to Ross
442
And please tell Joey Christmas will be snowing And Rachel and Chandler,
443
how's her in glimmer go!
444
Happy holidays, everybody.
445
Hey.
446
Oh, my God.
447
Hey!
448
Aw!
449
Hey!
450
Look at that!
451
It's a Christmas miracle!
452
What are you doing here?
453
I wanted to be with you.
454
I missed you so much.
455
Hey, hey, who'd you miss the most?
456
Monica.
457
Gotcha.
458
I never want to leave you again.
459
But I thought if you left, you'd get fired.
460
Turns out they can't fire me.
461
Because I quit.
462
What?
463
What?
464
You really quit your job?
465
Yeah.
466
It was a stupid job, and I could not stand leaving you.
467
And why should I be the only one who doesn't get to do what he really wants to do?
468
Well, what do you really want to do?
469
I have not thought this through.
470
Oh, my God.
471
I know.
472
I should have talked to you first about it.
473
No, I think that this is what you want to do.
474
I think it's great.
475
Thanks.
476
Chandler, your being here is the best Christmas present I could have ever imagined.
477
Aw.
478
Now, give me my real gift.
479
Oh, this is so good.
480
You have got to try it.
481
Hmm.
482
Oh, damn, I got it on my pants.
483
Here, I'll get it.
484
We better take these off upstairs or that stain's gonna set.
485
Yep.
486
I want to wear these pants on our date tonight.
487
Oh, great.
488
Okay, bye.
489
Oh, my God. That was unbelievable.
490
Okay, see, I told you.
491
Yeah, wow.
492
Sorry, Rach.
493
I don't believe they're brother and sister.
494
They're brother and sister?
495
Can I have dinner tonight?
496
Oh, I can't.
497
I've got a date with that waitress, Katie.
498
Yeah, I know we've only gone out, like, twice, but I don't know, I have a really good feeling about her.
499
Oh, I hear divorce bills.
500
All right, just give me your wallet, and there won't be a problem.
501
What?
502
I have a gun.
503
Okay, just relax, Phoebe.
504
Just stay calm.
505
Oh, my God, I can't find my wallet!
506
All right, lady.
507
Now, give me your purse.
508
No. What do you mean, no?
509
I knew you'd be my deaf Phoebe Buffay!
510
Lowell, is that you?
511
Phoebe?
512
Oh, my God!
513
Unbelievable, God!
514
Oh, my God!
515
Oh!
516
I'm sorry, Ross, this is my old friend Lowell from the streets.
517
Lowell, Ross.
518
Ross, nice to meet you.
519
Uh, real pleasure.
520
Oh!
521
It's been so long!
522
Oh, so long!
523
I can't believe you're still doing this.
524
Oh, I know.
525
But I quit smoking.
526
Good for you! Who is that?
527
Don't worry, I'm brave.
528
I am brave.
529
I am brave.
530
No, no, no, no, no!
531
Can you tell me who is there, please?
532
My name's Gary.
533
I live upstairs.
534
What?
535
Hi.
536
Hi.
537
Do you know what time it is?
538
It's candy time.
539
My roommate says that they taste like little drops of heaven.
540
Oh, please. Did you hear that?
541
Little drops of heaven.
542
4 a.m.
543
So, can I get some candy?
544
I am sorry, but some of us have to get up early to get up early
545
and go to work he does not know that i am not some of us
546
um listen i'm sorry but i'll put some out first thing in the morning well okay i'll swing by later
547
you live in this building seems like i would have remembered you nightgare
548
I'm sorry.
549
Ba-da-ba-da.
550
Ba-ba-da.
551
Ba-da-ba-da.
552
Do-do-do-do-do-do-do.
553
No, no, no, we're done.
554
We're done.
555
It's my free-all.
556
What?
557
I made a bet with myself that you had beautiful eyes.
558
Now that I see them, I win.
559
Huh?
560
We're at my stop.
561
But would you like to have coffee?
562
Are we really in Montreal?
563
Yes, we are. So, coffee?
564
Coffee sounds great.
565
Wait, so...
566
So you live in Montreal?
567
Oh, no, but it's just a two-hour ferry ride to Nova Scotia.
568
James, you look in the kitchen.
569
I will look in the back closet.
570
If I can save you town ladies, I'm right here.
571
Yeah.
572
Chandler, why don't you take a walk?
573
This doesn't concern you.
574
We are looking for our Christmas presents for Monica.
575
What?
576
That's terrible.
577
No, no, we do it every year.
578
Oh, well, that makes it not terrible.
579
No, yeah, we never find them.
580
She's always bested us, that wily.. minx.
581
Yeah, don't worry.
582
We're just gonna search here for an hour, and then we're gonna go over to Joey's and search, okay?
583
No, not okay.
584
You can't look for Monica's presents.
585
Oh, no, we have to.
586
No, you don't have to, and you can't, because I live here, too.
587
Well, then you should look with us.
588
Why?
589
Chandler, aren't you worried about what to get Monica for Christmas?
590
No, I have a great idea for a present for her.
591
Oh, that's it?
592
A great idea?
593
I guess.
594
Chandler, that's not enough.
595
I mean, what if she gets you a great present, two medium presents, and then a bunch of little presents, and you've just gotten her one great present?
596
I mean, that's just gonna make her feel bad.
597
Why would you do that to her, Chandler?
598
Why?
599
Why?
600
If I helped, we could find him faster.
601
Yeah, that's right.
602
Listen, now, you want anything to drink?
603
Because I'm heading up there.
604
Uh, yeah, I'll take a coffee.
605
Thanks, man.
606
Sure.
607
Coffee?
608
Yeah.
609
Coffee?
610
Because I'm going up there.
611
Oh, no, thank you.
612
You guys need anything?
613
Because I'm heading up there.
614
I'd love, uh, ice water.
615
You got it.
616
Joey, what are you doing?
617
Just being friendly.
618
Joey, I don't think you're supposed to go back there.
619
No, no, it's okay.
620
Right, Gunther?
621
Don't wink at me.
622
Put on your apron.
623
okay don't see you asking any other paying customers to put on aprons Joey do you work here no waiter yeah
624
Joey what's going on why didn't you tell us you work here Well, that...
625
Well, it's kind of embarrassing, you know?
626
I mean, I was an actor, now I'm a waiter.
627
It's supposed to go in the other direction. So is your apron.
628
You're wearing it like a cape.
629
I mean, the job's easy and the money's good, you know?
630
And I guess if I'm gonna be hanging out here anyway, I might as well get paid for it, right?
631
I just feel kind of weird serving you guys, you know?
632
Oh, Joey, come on.
633
I did it and it was fine.
634
Yeah, why would it be weird?
635
Hey, Joey, uh, can I get some coffee?
636
Okay, I guess it doesn't seem that weird.
637
Seriously, I asked you before, you still haven't gotten it.
638
Now it's weird again.
639
I think it's great that you work here.
640
You're gonna make a lot of money, and here's your first tip.
641
Don't eat yellow snow.
642
2.15 coffeehouse.
643
Bye.
644
I just got us reservations at Michelle's
645
and tickets to the music band to celebrate our first holiday season as a betrothed couple.
646
Betrothed.
647
Betrothed couple.
648
Hey.
649
Hi.
650
Huh?
651
Oh.
652
Bibs?
653
Huh?
654
Skull?
655
Oh, yeah, it's my mom's.
656
Oh, my God!
657
No, it's not my mom.
658
It belonged to my mom.
659
Yeah, no, she used to put it out every Christmas to remind us that even though it's Christmas, people still die.
660
And you can put candy in it.
661
Hey, hey.
662
Licorice?
663
Sure.
664
Hey, I just found out I get Ben for the holidays this year.
665
Oh, that's great.
666
Are you gonna dress up with Santa?
667
Nope.
668
I mean, I know Susan does every year, but I think I want to take this year to teach him all about Hanukkah.
669
And maybe I could teach Ben about the Christmas skull and how people die.
670
You may need to use this year to teach Ben about Phoebe.
671
Okay.
672
How can I help you?
673
Well, um, do you have a Santa outfit left?
674
Two days before Christmas?
675
Sorry, man.
676
Okay, look, do you have anything, uh, Christmassy?
677
I promised my son, and I really don't want to disappoint him.
678
Um, come on, I.. you gotta have something.
679
I'm the holiday armadillo!
680
I'm a friend of Santa's, and he sent me here to wish you a Merry Christmas.
681
What happened to Santa, Holiday Armadillo?
682
Santa was unavailable so close to Christmas.
683
Oh, come in.
684
Have a seat.
685
You must be exhausted coming all the way from Texas.
686
Texas?
687
That's right, Ben.
688
I'm Santa's representative for all the southern states. And Mexico!
689
But Santa sent me here to give you these presents, Ben.
690
Maybe the lady will help me with these presents.
691
Wow, thanks!
692
You're welcome, Ben.
693
Merry Christmas.
694
Ooh. And...
695
Happy Hanukkah!
696
Are you for Hanukkah, too?
697
Because I'm part Jewish.
698
You are?
699
Me, too!
700
Because armadillos also wandered in the desert?
701
It's just, and this is really embarrassing.
702
But lately, with this whole pregnancy thing, I'm just finding myself...
703
How do I put this?
704
Um, erotically charged.
705
Is that college talk for horny?
706
Yeah.
707
So, you know, I have all of these feelings, and I don't know what to do about them because I can't date like a normal person, which is fine because I don't need a relationship.
708
I mean, all I really want is one great night.
709
Just sex, you know?
710
No strings attached.
711
No relationship.
712
Just someone that I feel comfortable with and who knows what he's doing.
713
Just one great night.
714
I mean, is that really so hard... to find?
715
So, how was your day?
716
Good.
717
I saw a pretty big pigeon.
718
Well, I gotta get up early, and it's almost 7 o'clock, so...
719
Yeah, I gotta throw it in my room, too.
720
Okay, goodnight.
721
Goodnight.
722
I can't do it!
723
I didn't ask you to do it!
724
You're Rachel!
725
You're Joey!
726
You're my friend!
727
Right back at ya!
728
Yeah.
729
Plus, it would be wrong and weird and bad.
730
And so bad.
731
I don't even know what you're talking about because I didn't ask you to do anything.
732
I know.
733
You wanna do it?
734
No!
735
I mean, either.
736
I'm just testing you.
737
Hey, well, that's the end of this conversation.
738
This conversation never happened.
739
Never happened.
740
Good night.
741
Happy holidays!
742
Feliz Navidad!
743
Allo!
744
And Merry Christmas!
745
Oh, thank you, sir.
746
Here's some joy.
747
Hey!
748
I want to see how it's going.
749
Well, it's going okay.
750
Oh, good.
751
Here.
752
Let me help you out.
753
Oh, thanks.
754
Yeah.
755
Wow.
756
Is that a new suede jacket?
757
It looks really expensive.
758
Yeah.
759
I guess.
760
Just get your nails done.
761
Yes, Phoebe, but this is all I have, okay?
762
Okay, thanks.
763
Happy holidays.
764
Here's your joy.
765
Thank you.
766
Thank you.
767
Happy holidays.
768
And, wait, you can't take the money out.
769
I'm making change.
770
I need change for the bus.
771
But can't you leave the dollar?
772
This money's for the poor.
773
I'm poor.
774
I gotta take the bus.
775
Okay, season's greetings and everything, but still.
776
Bite me, blondie.
777
Oh!
778
Oh, I'm gonna give him something besides joy.
779
Just...
780
I can't believe I'm crying in front of you.
781
You must think I'm so pathetic.
782
No, no, no. I admire a man who can cry.
783
Really?
784
Don't touch my coat.
785
Oh, sorry.
786
That's my phone.
787
Hello?
788
Hey, hey, Rach, how's it going?
789
Oh, my God, this is the worst date ever.
790
Look, you know what?
791
I'm sorry, but did you really think that this was going well?
792
What's up?
793
Hey, did you stop by here?
794
No. Oh, my God!
795
Oh, thank God!
796
And, like, there you are!
797
What do you mean, there you are?
798
Where was she?
799
Oh, we were playing peekaboo.
800
She just.. she loves it when I'm dramatic.
801
Why isn't it Spiderman?
802
You know, like, Goldman, Silverman?
803
Because it's not his last name.
804
It isn't?
805
No, it's not like.. like Phil Spiderman.
806
He's a spider.. man.
807
You know, like, uh, like, Goldman is a last name, but there's no gold man.
808
Oh, okay.
809
There should be a gold man.
810
Rachel, what are you doing?
811
It's freezing out here.
812
Would you come back inside?
813
No, no, no, no, no. You wanted me to take him down, so...
814
I'm taking him down.
815
Okay?
816
Whoa!
817
Rachel!
818
Rachel!
819
I'm okay!
820
I'm okay!
821
Mr. Hickles?
822
Mr. Hickles, could you help me, please?
823
See, this is just the kind of thing I was talking about.
824
Phoebe and Mike are perfect for each other, and I know I speak for everyone here when I wish them a lifetime of happiness.
825
Who has the rings?
826
When I was growing up, I didn't have a normal mom and dad, or a regular family like everybody else, and I always knew that something was missing.
827
But now I'm standing here today knowing that I have everything I'm ever going to need.
828
You are my family.
829
Phoebe, you are so beautiful.
830
You're so kind.
831
You're so generous.
832
You're so wonderfully weird.
833
Every day with you is an adventure.
834
And I can't believe how lucky I am.
835
And I can't wait to share my life with you forever.
836
Oh, wait.
837
Oh, I forgot.
838
And, um, I love you.
839
And you have nice eyes.
840
I love you, too.
841
Uh, Joey?
842
Yeah?
843
Chappie's heart rate has slowed way down.
844
Okay, uh, Phoebe, do you take this man to be your husband?
845
I do.
846
Mike, do you take this woman to be your wife?
847
I do.
848
I now pronounce you husband and wife.
849
I got married!
850
Could someone get me a code?
851
I'm freaking freezing.
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Vocabolario e note di pronuncia per questa lezione
Questo video contiene 851 frasi e 4848 parole da ripetere con lo shadowing. Il parlato dura 38:18. Chi parla mantiene un ritmo costante di circa 127 parole al minuto, comodo per lo shadowing. Il 82% delle parole rientra nelle 3.000 più comuni dell’inglese; conviene studiare le altre prima di iniziare.
Vocaboli chiave di questo video
15 parole del video che vale la pena imparare, con pronuncia e significato:
| Parola | Pronuncia | Significato |
|---|---|---|
| cookie sostantivo | /ˈkʊki/ | biscotto |
| candy sostantivo | /ˈkæn.di/ | caramella, confetto |
| backup sostantivo | /ˈbækˌʌp/ | riserva, sostituto |
| honey sostantivo | /ˈhʌni/ | miele |
| boot sostantivo | /but/ | stivale, scarpone |
| apologize verbo | /əˈpɑləˌd͡ʒaɪz/ | scusarsi |
| fulfill verbo | /fʊlˈfɪl/ | completare |
| tennis sostantivo | /ˈtɛnɪs/ | tennis |
| brave aggettivo | /bɹeɪv/ | coraggioso, ardito |
| freeze verbo | /ˈfɹiːz/ | gelare, ghiacciare |
| puzzle sostantivo | /ˈpʌzəl/ | mistero, rompicapo |
| upstairs avverbio | /ˌʌpˈstɛɹz/ | di sopra |
| pants sostantivo | /pænts/ | calzoni, pantaloni |
| strip verbo | /ˈstɹɪp/ | strappare, togliere |
| pregnancy sostantivo | /ˈpɹɛɡnənsi/ | gravidanza |
I phrasal verb che sentirai
| Parola | Significato |
|---|---|
| send out verbo | inviare |
| get up verbo | alzarsi |
| go back verbo | tornare |
| come back verbo | tornare |
| find out verbo | scoprire |
| go out verbo | uscire, andare fuori |
| go up verbo | salire |
| grow up verbo | crescere |
La grammatica di questo video
Le strutture che chi parla usa di più, con le parole esatte del video:
| Struttura | Nel video |
|---|---|
| Frasi condizionali if + frase, will/would + verbo — una condizione e il suo risultato | if you don't mind, maybe this will be · if you left, you'd get |
| “Used to” used to + verbo — un’abitudine o uno stato passato che non è più vero | used to use · used to put |
| Present perfect have/has + participio passato — un’azione passata che conta ancora adesso | It's been · you've never offered · I've seen |
| Forma passiva be + participio passato — conta ciò che accade, non chi lo fa | are thrown · be called · be blackmailed |
Pronuncia a cui fare attenzione
Chi parla usa 220 contrazioni e forme ridotte, come I'm, don't, gonna. Pronunciale nella forma breve, così come le senti.
- I suoni “th”: bother /ˈbɑðɚ/, pathetic /pəˈθɛtɪk/, thrice /θɹaɪs/
- I suoni “sh” e “zh”: massage /məˈsɑ(d)ʒ/, gosh /ɡɑːʃ/, flash /flæʃ/, trash /tɹæʃ/, congratulations /kənˌɡɹæt͡ʃəˈleɪʃ(ə)nz/
- Parole lunghe — attenzione all’accento: apologize /əˈpɑləˌd͡ʒaɪz/, unbelievable /ˌʌnbɪˈliːvəbl̩/, congratulations /kənˌɡɹæt͡ʃəˈleɪʃ(ə)nz/, reservation /ˌɹɛz.ɚˈveɪ.ʃən/, unavailable /ˌʌnəˈveɪləbəl/
Come esercitarsi con questo video
- Ascolta tutto il video una volta senza parlare e annota le parole che non conosci.
- Fai shadowing frase per frase a velocità normale, ripetendo ognuna finché il tuo ritmo coincide con quello di chi parla.
- Registrati e confronta con l’originale, facendo attenzione a parole come cookie, candy, backup.
Cos'è la tecnica dello Shadowing?
Shadowing è una tecnica di apprendimento delle lingue supportata da studi scientifici, originariamente sviluppata per la formazione dei traduttori professionisti e resa popolare dal poliglotta Dr. Alexander Arguelles. Il metodo è semplice ma potente: ascolti un audio in inglese di madrelingua e lo ripeti immediatamente ad alta voce — come un'ombra che segue il parlante con un ritardo di solo 1–2 secondi. A differenza dell'ascolto passivo o degli esercizi di grammatica, lo shadowing costringe il tuo cervello e i muscoli della bocca a elaborare e riprodurre simultaneamente i modelli di discorso reale. La ricerca dimostra che migliora significativamente la precisione della pronuncia, l'intonazione, il ritmo, il discorso connesso, la comprensione dell'ascolto e la fluidità del parlato — rendendolo uno dei metodi più efficaci per la preparazione alla prova di speaking dell'IELTS e per la comunicazione reale in inglese.