Shadowing Practice: Objectify him: texting - Learn English Speaking with Video

I'm Dr. Orion Tarraban, and this is Psych Hacks, Better Living Through Psychology.

And the topic of today's short talk is, objectify him.

This is going to be a fun one.

That's right, ladies, objectify the man that you've set your sights on.

Make him feel like a sentient piece of meat.

You'll thank me later.

To understand the reasoning behind this advice, I'll need to explain one of the biggest disjuncts in the modern courtship process.

Let's call it a failure in intersexual understanding.

Basically, men are giving women what they wish women would give them, and women are giving men what they wish men would give to them.

And this doesn't work because what men and women want are different.

However, because of this failure, what happens?

Men get a lot of cutesy texts from their women about couples

and puppies and unfunny jokes that make men question their intelligence.

And women get dick pics.

And both sides are thinking to themselves, why the hell did this person send me this?

And the short answer is because they hope to get something like it in return.

The long answer is actually pretty deep.

Basically, after the initial blissful period in which the child can bask in unconditional love,

a new conditionality from its parents begins to enter the equation.

Children learn that they have to do certain things

and not do certain other things in order to stay in the parents' good graces.

Introduction of these standards of behavior are first met with tantrums, extinction bursts.

But when they don't work, children take a new tack.

They mimic the love

and affection they previously received from the parent in an attempt to get it reflected back at them in the present moment.

In essence, they identify with the parent

and try to shape the parent's behavior to be more in line with their own preferences.

They're basically saying, this is how I want you to treat me.

Turns out, people don't grow up that much.

And in many ways, the intensity and intimacy of sexual relationships returns us to this time in our past.

However, just like the parent and the child in my previous example, it's important to keep in mind that men and women want different things.

And instead of throwing a tantrum or taking what they want by force, adults in sexual relationships have hit on a more pro -social,

if somewhat boneheaded, strategy to get what they want from the other.

They give it themselves.

So that's our answer.

Men send dick pics and sexually explicit content to women because it would make their fucking day if women did the same.

In their ham -fisted way, they are saying, I'm giving this to you in the hope that you'll give it back to me.

Unfortunately, many women find these texts disgusting.

They think that it's disrespectful to be objectified.

It doesn't make her, the person inside the body, feel seen or valuable.

And her greatest fear could be that the man she is engaging with is primarily or exclusively interested in her for sex.

So what does she do?

She sends the guy memes and content that touch on anything except the sexual dimension of their relationship.

Her communication is emotional or personal or relational.

In her own ham -fisted way, she is saying, I'm giving this to you first in the hope that you'll give it back to me.

Unfortunately, many men find these texts inane.

They don't usually pertain to their own goals or interests, so they perceive it as just another emotional chore associated with dealing with women.

And the absence of adult content exacerbates their greatest fear that the women they are engaging with aren't sexually interested in them.

And somewhere, somehow, God is laughing.

Are you finally ready to understand how relationships really work?

Then get your hands on my book, The Value of Others, How to Get and Keep More of What You Want in the Sexual marketplace.

Learn what actually moves the needle, why relationships fail, and how to position yourself for success in this strange new world of mating and dating.

Over 100 ,000 copies sold.

Get yours today.

Now available in ebook, audiobook, and paperback formats.

The links are in the description.

Fortunately, the way out of this conundrum is simple.

Instead of giving what we hope to receive in return, we appreciate that men and women want different things,

learn what those are, and give the other side what they want instead.

We'll start with the men because they're easier.

Men want to know that you're excited to fuck them.

I cannot make it any more straightforward than that.

Men want to know that you're excited to fuck them.

Trust me, ladies, it will make a man's day.

It will make a man's month to be objectified.

Tell him you love his fucking arms.

Tell him that you're daydreaming about his big cock.

Tell him you got wet thinking about the last time you were together.

This is the easiest way you can start improving your relationship today.

This kind of communication is immensely attractive to the vast majority of men.

Why?

Because nobody gives men compliments.

And any compliments they do receive are based on their effort, success, or outcome.

You can differentiate yourself from all other women by unabashedly lusting after him.

Like, think of the most disgusting, inappropriate text you've ever received from a man.

Switch around the genders and send that instead.

Problem solved.

Now, for the women.

Women want to know that you're thinking about them when they're not around.

Why?

Because you can't fuck them when they're not around.

So they think that if you're still thinking about them when you can't fuck them, it must mean that you like them and not just their absent bodies.

And this liking is demonstrated through affection.

Affection is actually not that complicated.

What's more, it's completely free, and it's never been easier in the history of the world to give affection to women with our current technologies.

Basically, affection is a token of remembrance.

It's a sign that you remember what she said last week, or where you went together last year, or what you've learned of her preferences.

So the communication needs to be accurately personal

and the more it's coded through references that only she

or you both will understand the better and the easiest way to do

that is through memes you're on social media anyway so now

when you're on social media and you see something that reminds you of her you click forward her account and send

yeah it literally takes two seconds And the more accurately the meme resonates with her humor and interests or preferences,

the more the communication gains in value.

When in doubt, find a pic of two little animals holding hands, comment us, and forward it along.

It's really not that hard.

And this is how we solve the problem of intersexual understanding.

In a perfect world, men and women's textual exchanges with each other would be exactly reversed.

Women would send the naughty, filthy messages, and men would send the sweet, affectionate messages, and both sides would get more of what they want.

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But to do that, people have to grow up a bit and stop living like little children, trying to model the love they want out of their parents.

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Identification with the loved object is dangerous when people actually have different needs

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and wants just consider how ridiculous it would be to put food in your car's gas tank but

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that is effectively what billions of people do every day in

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their sexual relationships it can stop with us what do you

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think does this fit with your own experience let me know in the comments below

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and please send this episode to someone who you think might

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benefit from its message i know you know somebody who needs

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to hear this it's word of mouth referrals like this that really help to make the channel grow.

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I have a lot of value elsewhere.

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The menu of services is getting so long, I can't talk about it here.

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If you're at all interested in some of the things that I have to say that I can't talk about on YouTube, then go down to the description and check it out,

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including opportunities to engage with me directly through my private community and individual consultations.

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The links to everything are in the description below.

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Trust me, there's a lot there for you.

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As always, thank you for listening, and I appreciate your support.

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Let's go.

📺 Zelfde Kanaal

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24 zinnen

Woordenschat en spreektips bij deze les

Deze spreekles is gebaseerd op de video “Objectify him: texting”. Deze woorden komen het vaakst terug: send, relationship, parent. Deze video bevat 116 zinnen en 1445 woorden om na te spreken. Het gesproken deel duurt 9:38. De spreker praat in een natuurlijk tempo van ongeveer 150 woorden per minuut, dicht bij een alledaags gesprek. 88% van de woorden hoort bij de 3.000 meest gebruikte Engelse woorden, dus de woordenschat is goed te volgen.

Belangrijke woorden in deze video

15 woorden uit de video die het leren waard zijn, met uitspraak en betekenis:

Woord	Uitspraak	Betekenis
preference zelfstandig naamwoord	/ˈpɹɛf(ə)ɹ(ə)ns/	voorkeur, preferentie
meme zelfstandig naamwoord	/miːm/	meme, meem
solve werkwoord	/sɒlv/	oplossen
disgusting bijvoeglijk naamwoord	/dɪsˈɡʌstɪŋ/	walgelijk, afschuwelijk
accurately bijwoord	/ˈæk.jə.ɹɪt.li/	trefzeker
compliment zelfstandig naamwoord	/ˈkɑmpləmənt/	compliment
fist zelfstandig naamwoord	/fɪst/	vuist
topic zelfstandig naamwoord	/ˈtɑpɪk/	onderwerp, thema
vast bijvoeglijk naamwoord	/væst/	enorm
complicated bijvoeglijk naamwoord	/ˈkɑm.plɪˌkeɪ.tɪd/	ingewikkeld, gecompliceerd
format zelfstandig naamwoord	/ˈfɔːɹ.mæt/	lay-out, formaat
ridiculous bijvoeglijk naamwoord	/ɹɪˈdɪk.jə.ləs/	belachelijk, lachwekkend
reflect werkwoord	/ɹɪˈflɛkt/	weerkaatsen
remind werkwoord	/ɹəˈmaɪnd/	herinneren
absence zelfstandig naamwoord	/ˈæb.s(ə)n̩s/	afwezigheid, verstek

Phrasal verbs die je zult horen

Woord	Betekenis
grow up werkwoord	opgroeien
turn out werkwoord	uitvallen, resulteren

Zinnen om te herhalen

Korte, volledige zinnen uit de video die je in alledaagse gesprekken kunt gebruiken:

Let's call it a failure in intersexual understanding.
Are you finally ready to understand how relationships really work?
We'll start with the men because they're easier.
Trust me, ladies, it will make a man's day.
Tell him that you're daydreaming about his big cock.

Grammatica in deze video

De structuren die de spreker het meest gebruikt, met de exacte woorden uit de video:

Structuur	In de video
Present perfect have/has + voltooid deelwoord — iets uit het verleden dat nu nog telt	you've set · have hit · you've ever received
Lijdende vorm be + voltooid deelwoord — het gaat om wat er gebeurt, niet om wie het doet	be objectified · are based · is demonstrated
Betrekkelijke bijzinnen who / which + zin — extra informatie over een persoon of ding	someone who you · somebody who needs

Uitspraak om op te letten

De spreker gebruikt 33 samentrekkingen en verkorte vormen, zoals you're, can't, they're. Spreek ze kort uit, zoals je ze hoort.

De klanken “sh” en “zh”: affection /əˈfɛk.ʃən/, associate /əˈsoʊʃi.ət/, identification /aɪˌdɛn(t)ɪfɪˈkeɪʃn̩/, consultation /ˌkɑnsəlˈteɪʃən/, dimension /daɪˈmɛn.ʃən/
Lange woorden — let op de klemtoon: accurately /ˈæk.jə.ɹɪt.li/, primarily /ˈpɹaɪ.mə.ɹə.li/, complicated /ˈkɑm.plɪˌkeɪ.tɪd/, ridiculous /ɹɪˈdɪk.jə.ləs/, associate /əˈsoʊʃi.ət/

Klanken die Nederlandstaligen lastig vinden:

Stemhebbende eindmedeklinker — /b/, /d/, /g/, /z/, /v/ niet verscherpen: engage /ɪnˈɡeɪd͡ʒ/, solve /sɒlv/, complicated /ˈkɑm.plɪˌkeɪ.tɪd/, remind /ɹəˈmaɪnd/, straightforward /ˌstɹeɪtˈfɔː(ɹ)wə(ɹ)d/
/æ/ — opener dan de Nederlandse “e”: accurately /ˈæk.jə.ɹɪt.li/, vast /væst/, format /ˈfɔːɹ.mæt/, absence /ˈæb.s(ə)n̩s/, absent /ˈæb.sn̩t/
/g/ — een harde plofklank, geen Nederlandse “g”: engage /ɪnˈɡeɪd͡ʒ/, disgusting /dɪsˈɡʌstɪŋ/, exacerbate /ɪɡˈzæsɚˌbeɪt/

Zo oefen je met deze video

Luister de hele video één keer zonder te spreken en noteer de woorden die je niet kent.
Begin op 0,75× snelheid, spreek zin voor zin na en ga terug naar normale snelheid zodra het makkelijk gaat.
Neem jezelf op en vergelijk met het origineel; let daarbij op woorden als preference, meme, solve.

Wat is de Shadowing-techniek?

Shadowing is een wetenschappelijk onderbouwde taalleermethode die oorspronkelijk is ontwikkeld voor professionele tolkentraining en gepopulariseerd door polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. De methode is eenvoudig maar krachtig: je luistert naar native Engelse audio en herhaalt het onmiddellijk hardop — als een schaduw die de spreker volgt met slechts 1–2 seconden vertraging. In tegenstelling tot passief luisteren of grammaticadrills, dwingt shadowing je hersenen en mondspieren om echte spraakpatronen tegelijkertijd te verwerken en te reproduceren. Onderzoek toont aan dat het de uitspraaknauwkeurigheid, intonatie, ritme, verbonden spraak, luisterbegrip en spreekvaardigheid aanzienlijk verbetert — waardoor het een van de meest effectieve methoden is voor IELTS Speaking-voorbereiding en echte Engelse communicatie.

Shadowing-techniek: lees de volledige stap-voor-stap-gids →

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