쉐도잉 연습: Objectify him: texting - 영상으로 영어 말하기 배우기

I'm Dr. Orion Tarraban, and this is Psych Hacks, Better Living Through Psychology.

And the topic of today's short talk is, objectify him.

This is going to be a fun one.

That's right, ladies, objectify the man that you've set your sights on.

Make him feel like a sentient piece of meat.

You'll thank me later.

To understand the reasoning behind this advice, I'll need to explain one of the biggest disjuncts in the modern courtship process.

Let's call it a failure in intersexual understanding.

Basically, men are giving women what they wish women would give them, and women are giving men what they wish men would give to them.

And this doesn't work because what men and women want are different.

However, because of this failure, what happens?

Men get a lot of cutesy texts from their women about couples

and puppies and unfunny jokes that make men question their intelligence.

And women get dick pics.

And both sides are thinking to themselves, why the hell did this person send me this?

And the short answer is because they hope to get something like it in return.

The long answer is actually pretty deep.

Basically, after the initial blissful period in which the child can bask in unconditional love,

a new conditionality from its parents begins to enter the equation.

Children learn that they have to do certain things

and not do certain other things in order to stay in the parents' good graces.

Introduction of these standards of behavior are first met with tantrums, extinction bursts.

But when they don't work, children take a new tack.

They mimic the love

and affection they previously received from the parent in an attempt to get it reflected back at them in the present moment.

In essence, they identify with the parent

and try to shape the parent's behavior to be more in line with their own preferences.

They're basically saying, this is how I want you to treat me.

Turns out, people don't grow up that much.

And in many ways, the intensity and intimacy of sexual relationships returns us to this time in our past.

However, just like the parent and the child in my previous example, it's important to keep in mind that men and women want different things.

And instead of throwing a tantrum or taking what they want by force, adults in sexual relationships have hit on a more pro -social,

if somewhat boneheaded, strategy to get what they want from the other.

They give it themselves.

So that's our answer.

Men send dick pics and sexually explicit content to women because it would make their fucking day if women did the same.

In their ham -fisted way, they are saying, I'm giving this to you in the hope that you'll give it back to me.

Unfortunately, many women find these texts disgusting.

They think that it's disrespectful to be objectified.

It doesn't make her, the person inside the body, feel seen or valuable.

And her greatest fear could be that the man she is engaging with is primarily or exclusively interested in her for sex.

So what does she do?

She sends the guy memes and content that touch on anything except the sexual dimension of their relationship.

Her communication is emotional or personal or relational.

In her own ham -fisted way, she is saying, I'm giving this to you first in the hope that you'll give it back to me.

Unfortunately, many men find these texts inane.

They don't usually pertain to their own goals or interests, so they perceive it as just another emotional chore associated with dealing with women.

And the absence of adult content exacerbates their greatest fear that the women they are engaging with aren't sexually interested in them.

And somewhere, somehow, God is laughing.

Are you finally ready to understand how relationships really work?

Then get your hands on my book, The Value of Others, How to Get and Keep More of What You Want in the Sexual marketplace.

Learn what actually moves the needle, why relationships fail, and how to position yourself for success in this strange new world of mating and dating.

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Get yours today.

Now available in ebook, audiobook, and paperback formats.

The links are in the description.

Fortunately, the way out of this conundrum is simple.

Instead of giving what we hope to receive in return, we appreciate that men and women want different things,

learn what those are, and give the other side what they want instead.

We'll start with the men because they're easier.

Men want to know that you're excited to fuck them.

I cannot make it any more straightforward than that.

Men want to know that you're excited to fuck them.

Trust me, ladies, it will make a man's day.

It will make a man's month to be objectified.

Tell him you love his fucking arms.

Tell him that you're daydreaming about his big cock.

Tell him you got wet thinking about the last time you were together.

This is the easiest way you can start improving your relationship today.

This kind of communication is immensely attractive to the vast majority of men.

Why?

Because nobody gives men compliments.

And any compliments they do receive are based on their effort, success, or outcome.

You can differentiate yourself from all other women by unabashedly lusting after him.

Like, think of the most disgusting, inappropriate text you've ever received from a man.

Switch around the genders and send that instead.

Problem solved.

Now, for the women.

Women want to know that you're thinking about them when they're not around.

Why?

Because you can't fuck them when they're not around.

So they think that if you're still thinking about them when you can't fuck them, it must mean that you like them and not just their absent bodies.

And this liking is demonstrated through affection.

Affection is actually not that complicated.

What's more, it's completely free, and it's never been easier in the history of the world to give affection to women with our current technologies.

Basically, affection is a token of remembrance.

It's a sign that you remember what she said last week, or where you went together last year, or what you've learned of her preferences.

So the communication needs to be accurately personal

and the more it's coded through references that only she

or you both will understand the better and the easiest way to do

that is through memes you're on social media anyway so now

when you're on social media and you see something that reminds you of her you click forward her account and send

yeah it literally takes two seconds And the more accurately the meme resonates with her humor and interests or preferences,

the more the communication gains in value.

When in doubt, find a pic of two little animals holding hands, comment us, and forward it along.

It's really not that hard.

And this is how we solve the problem of intersexual understanding.

In a perfect world, men and women's textual exchanges with each other would be exactly reversed.

Women would send the naughty, filthy messages, and men would send the sweet, affectionate messages, and both sides would get more of what they want.

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But to do that, people have to grow up a bit and stop living like little children, trying to model the love they want out of their parents.

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Identification with the loved object is dangerous when people actually have different needs

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and wants just consider how ridiculous it would be to put food in your car's gas tank but

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that is effectively what billions of people do every day in

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their sexual relationships it can stop with us what do you

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think does this fit with your own experience let me know in the comments below

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and please send this episode to someone who you think might

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benefit from its message i know you know somebody who needs

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to hear this it's word of mouth referrals like this that really help to make the channel grow.

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I have a lot of value elsewhere.

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The menu of services is getting so long, I can't talk about it here.

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If you're at all interested in some of the things that I have to say that I can't talk about on YouTube, then go down to the description and check it out,

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including opportunities to engage with me directly through my private community and individual consultations.

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The links to everything are in the description below.

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Trust me, there's a lot there for you.

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As always, thank you for listening, and I appreciate your support.

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Let's go.

📺 같은 채널

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✨ 추천 영상

How Cell Phones Impact Our Relationships

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24 문장

이 레슨의 어휘와 말하기 포인트

이 말하기 레슨은 영상 “Objectify him: texting”을(를) 바탕으로 합니다. 가장 자주 반복되는 단어는 다음과 같습니다: send, relationship, parent. 이 영상에는 섀도잉할 문장 116개와 단어 1445개가 있습니다. 말하는 구간의 길이는 9:38입니다. 화자는 분당 약 150단어로, 일상 대화에 가까운 자연스러운 속도로 말합니다. 단어의 88%가 영어에서 가장 많이 쓰이는 3,000단어에 속해 어휘가 쉬운 편입니다.

이 영상의 핵심 어휘

영상에 나오는 익혀 둘 만한 단어 15개를 발음, 뜻과 함께 정리했습니다.

단어	발음	뜻
preference 명사	/ˈpɹɛf(ə)ɹ(ə)ns/	선택
meme 명사	/miːm/	밈
solve 동사	/sɒlv/	해결하다
disgusting 형용사	/dɪsˈɡʌstɪŋ/	역겹다
compliment 명사	/ˈkɑmpləmənt/	칭찬, 찬사
fist 명사	/fɪst/	주먹
topic 명사	/ˈtɑpɪk/	화제, 주제
vast 형용사	/væst/	광대하다, 거대하다
complicated 형용사	/ˈkɑm.plɪˌkeɪ.tɪd/	복잡하다
format 명사	/ˈfɔːɹ.mæt/	포맷
ridiculous 형용사	/ɹɪˈdɪk.jə.ləs/	웃으운
associate 명사	/əˈsoʊʃi.ət/	제휴자, 조합원
reflect 동사	/ɹɪˈflɛkt/	반사(反射)하다
remind 동사	/ɹəˈmaɪnd/	생각나게 하다, 상기(想起)시키다
absence 명사	/ˈæb.s(ə)n̩s/	결석, 부재

따라 말해 볼 만한 문장

영상에 나오는 짧고 완결된 문장으로, 일상 대화에서 그대로 쓸 수 있습니다:

Let's call it a failure in intersexual understanding.
Are you finally ready to understand how relationships really work?
We'll start with the men because they're easier.
Trust me, ladies, it will make a man's day.
Tell him that you're daydreaming about his big cock.

이 영상의 문법

화자가 가장 많이 쓰는 문형을 영상 속 실제 표현과 함께 정리했습니다.

문형	영상 속 표현
현재완료 have/has + 과거분사 — 과거의 일이 지금도 관련이 있을 때	you've set · have hit · you've ever received
수동태 be + 과거분사 — 누가 하는지보다 무슨 일이 일어나는지에 초점	be objectified · are based · is demonstrated
관계절 who / which + 절 — 사람이나 사물에 대한 추가 정보	someone who you · somebody who needs

주의할 발음

화자는 you're, can't, they're 같은 축약형과 약화된 형태를 33번 사용합니다. 들리는 대로 짧게 발음하세요.

“sh”와 “zh” 소리: affection /əˈfɛk.ʃən/, associate /əˈsoʊʃi.ət/, identification /aɪˌdɛn(t)ɪfɪˈkeɪʃn̩/, consultation /ˌkɑnsəlˈteɪʃən/, dimension /daɪˈmɛn.ʃən/
긴 단어 — 강세 위치에 주의: accurately /ˈæk.jə.ɹɪt.li/, primarily /ˈpɹaɪ.mə.ɹə.li/, complicated /ˈkɑm.plɪˌkeɪ.tɪd/, ridiculous /ɹɪˈdɪk.jə.ləs/, associate /əˈsoʊʃi.ət/

한국어 화자가 어려워하는 소리:

/f/ — ㅍ(/p/)으로 바꾸지 말고 윗니를 아랫입술에 대기: affection /əˈfɛk.ʃən/, preference /ˈpɹɛf(ə)ɹ(ə)ns/, fist /fɪst/, format /ˈfɔːɹ.mæt/, reflect /ɹɪˈflɛkt/
/v/ — ㅂ(/b/)과 구별하기: solve /sɒlv/, vast /væst/, reverse /ɹɪˈvɝs/, exclusively /ɪkˈskluːsɪvli/, perceive /pɚˈsiv/
/z/ — ㅈ이 아니라 성대를 울리는 /s/: exacerbate /ɪɡˈzæsɚˌbeɪt/, resonate /ˈɹɛz.əˌneɪt/

이 영상으로 연습하는 방법

먼저 말하지 않고 영상을 끝까지 듣고 모르는 단어를 적어 둡니다.
0.75배속으로 한 문장씩 섀도잉을 시작하고, 익숙해지면 보통 속도로 돌아갑니다.
자신의 목소리를 녹음해 원본과 비교하고, preference, meme, solve 같은 단어에 특히 주의합니다.

쉐도잉이란? 영어 실력을 빠르게 키우는 과학적 방법

쉐도잉(Shadowing)은 원래 전문 통역사 훈련을 위해 개발된 언어 학습 기법으로, 다언어 학자인 Dr. Alexander Arguelles에 의해 대중화된 방법입니다. 핵심 원리는 간단하지만 매우 강력합니다: 원어민의 영어를 들으면서 1~2초의 짧은 지연으로 즉시 소리 내어 따라 말하는 것——마치 '그림자(shadow)'처럼 화자를 따라가는 것입니다. 문법 공부나 수동적인 청취와 달리, 쉐도잉은 뇌와 입 근육이 동시에 실시간으로 영어를 처리하고 재현하도록 훈련합니다. 연구에 따르면 이 방법은 발음 정확도, 억양, 리듬, 연음, 청취력, 말하기 유창성을 크게 향상시킵니다. IELTS 스피킹 준비와 자연스러운 영어 소통을 원하는 분들에게 특히 효과적입니다.

섀도잉 방법: 단계별 전체 가이드 읽기 →

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