Shadowing Practice: Asking New Yorkers About Their BIGGEST Regrets in Life - Learn English Speaking with Video
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I definitely thought I'd be making a lot of money at some high up position now.
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I thought I was going to be married at one point in my life.
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I definitely thought I'd have kids by now and have none of that.
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No one has their together.
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We all don't know what's going to happen in a month or a year.
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Little ideas, but no one has their together.
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I still have no effing clue what I'm doing.
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I wish I didn't spend so much time trying to be like everybody else
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when I knew in my gut that I wasn't.
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The world is not easy.
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It was not easy 50 years ago.
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It was not easy 500 years ago, and it will never be easy.
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You might think someone else has it easy, but I promise you they don't.
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In this video, I'm asking strangers in New York City what they wish they would do differently
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if they could relive their 20s and 30s, and what their best piece of advice for someone of your age would be.
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How old are you?
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34. What does it feel like to be 34?
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I definitely thought I'd be making a lot of money at some high -up position.
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Now I thought I was gonna be married at one point
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in my life I definitely thought I'd have kids by now and have none of that.
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I expected to like turn a corner and
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All of a sudden for like the heavens to open up
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and be filled with all of this knowledge and I still have no F -ing clue what I'm doing.
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I still
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Despite being on this earth like five decades I don't know what I'm doing
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But I think that's encouraging because then I can look at other people
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and be like none of you know what you're doing either Yeah, I heard that yesterday actually that someone was saying like as you get older
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or whatever just in general Nobody knows what they're doing.
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They don't know what I'm doing I care less about what people think though
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and that feels good that that is something
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that kind of like opened up like a book to me And I was like, oh yeah, no everybody else is just caring about what they look like and
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Themselves and like what what people think of them Yeah
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So I'm gonna stop caring about what people think of me
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because I know that everyone's just thinking about themselves And that's a good epiphany.
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I love that.
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No one has their shit together.
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I've been able to meet with some very successful people, and that's one takeaway is that we all don't know what's gonna happen in a month or a year.
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Little ideas, but no one has their shit together.
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So just remember that if you're going through a weird point in your life.
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Yeah.
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I used to worry a little bit about what other people thought.
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Don't be afraid to be yourself was something that I learned, and so glad that I came out of my shell at a younger age
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because if I didn't have that self -confidence and not be afraid to be who I am, I maybe wouldn't be here right now.
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I think I spent a lot of time
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when I was younger trying to be like everybody else
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when I knew in my gut that I wasn't and
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that I had a different path and that I had different interests and I've always been an old soul, hence the name of my business.
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I think I was born an 80 -year -old woman.
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I think I spent a lot of time fitting in
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when really when I learned that being myself is how not only I can be successful
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but also what I can offer to others.
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I wish I didn't spend so much time trying to do the opposite.
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For someone who feels that like that, like they don't fit in or they're different, what's your advice to them?
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You have to find people not necessarily who enjoy the same things as you
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but who will celebrate what you enjoy and
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so I think surrounding yourself with the right people is so important and also being comfortable spending time by yourself.
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There are some things that I like to do like alone that I'm perfectly happy doing by myself.
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When you're looking to fit in
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but you know you like to do things differently be okay with learning to love spending time with yourself.
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Hang out with quality people like that's that's gonna shape your
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habits everything you do every day is shaped by the people you have around you.
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So make sure you always surround yourself with people that inspire you and push you to be the better version of yourself.
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It's like cliche, but it's the reality.
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What do you do for a living?
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I make shit happen.
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I just live life, man.
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That's what I do for a living, live life, you know?
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I love that.
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A full -time liver.
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Yeah, absolutely.
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Growing up in Queens, I've seen so many great entrepreneurs come and do their thing.
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And I always knew working a nine to five wasn't going to get me there.
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So I wanted to come up with creative ways to get there.
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I make art now.
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I had a 30 -year retail career, and that That ended October of last year.
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I was a stockroom manager basically.
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I was an operations manager in one of the stores in Portland, Oregon for like 30 year retail career.
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I was incredibly unfulfilled and kind of didn't even know what was missing.
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I also was my own worst enemy and I was convincing myself
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that nobody was going to like my art or
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that since I didn't go to school for art
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that I had nothing new to say about art or creativity until I just did it without fear.
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Your fear of looking stupid is holding you back.
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I loved my job until I left it and I was like oh this is what I'm supposed to do.
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If you have to give three pieces of advice to someone working in a job they're not.. thrilled with?
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What would your best three pieces of advice, your best three tips be?
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Don't make excuses and just do it.
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Stop making excuses and just start.
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Take advice from a lot of people and make sure that you're still listening to your gut.
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The third one is make a business plan.
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I studied finance and was interning for two years at Morgan Stanley.
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I was going to go down that route of investment banking, wealth management, but I just knew something wasn't right.
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Like I'm so glad that I did that internship because it taught me that that wasn't for me.
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The best thing you could do is have a job that you don't have to you don't have to love your job.
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Have a job that supports you and gives you the time and flexibility to
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be creative and then you don't have to worry about making money and then when you do make money It's great.
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It's a little extra bonus every month.
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That is the best solution.
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Find time
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Have a nine -to -five job
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and spend your weekends having fun making videos of whatever you want to do And then maybe if it takes off, you could think about it.
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But I think people jump 100 steps ahead of what it takes.
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Don't quit your job until you have a plan and some sort of traction.
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So I would say stick to whatever's paying you first so you have some money coming in.
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You gotta just, long story short, just jump like a bird trying to fly.
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A bird trying to fly might hit the ground a few times, you might get your knees bloody, but then eventually you learn how to fly through that, through the failures.
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So it's about just jumping, trying, failing, keep going, keep your job until you see some money coming from your other job or your business.
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And then once you feel totally comfortable that that money is supplementing your original job, then I would say it's a good time to quit and then go full force in your business.
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Do you know someone your age or younger than you who enjoys their current life
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but knows they have the potential to do so much more?
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Well, I think that that person would really benefit from the Sprout Journal.
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I created this after leaving a six -figure job in banking to follow a totally different path, traveling the world and interviewing some of the oldest,
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wisest, and most accomplished people I could find about what made their life successful, fulfilling, and worth living.
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After more than a thousand of those conversations, we took the biggest lessons and turned them into one guided goal setting system.
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You start by looking honestly at your current life, then you design what your ideal life would look like,
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and the gap between those two versions of your life becomes a set of detailed, measurable goals.
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Then, for the next six months, you track those goals every day, every week, and every month, so you're not just thinking about the person you want to become, you're actually moving towards it.
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You don't need to start your whole life over.
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You just need to decide what you want the next chapter to look like.
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What is one truth about life you wish more people understood?
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World is not easy.
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It was not easy 50 years ago.
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It was not easy 500 years ago.
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And it will never be easy.
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There's lots of joys in life and it defines those joys in life.
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And you have to appreciate those joys in life.
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But understand that it's not easy.
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There's no easy way to do it.
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You might think someone else has it easy, but I promise you they don't.
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We're not guaranteed anything.
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And life is such a gift and I think we spend so much time harping on trivial things, harping on what people think and doing the right thing and all that.
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And I think it's that we should just feel empowered to live life in the way that speaks to us.
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Do things that we love, that bring us joy.
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Spend time with the people that we want to spend time with.
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Laugh a lot.
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You know, bring our sparkle.
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Karma is very real.
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The universe is very real.
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And do believe what you put in is what you'll get out.
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Be mindful of the synchronicities in life and the direction you're going in
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because the universe will send you people and things that you need to be productive and the best version of yourself.
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So just keep an eye out for those things and you'll be successful.
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I wish people understood the universe wants you to succeed and walk through these doors.
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I shouldn't even be saying this, but I once went to the Madison Square Garden with no ticket for a Knicks game.
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I had no ticket and I sat corsage, right?
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Because the universe wanted me, like I just walked with so much confidence.
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Nobody said anything to me
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so like a lot of people worry like oh I gotta have everything right oh I gotta
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just walk into it like the universe is kind of like wanting you to to go like unless you're hesitant
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if you come in like second guess now people might all right stop sir where are you going
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but when you're walking powerful and strong
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and confident people like this right this way sir your seat's
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right here I sat courtside I had no ticket meeting popcorn you know meeting people
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and stuff like that so I wish people understood
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that just go like the universe is it's opening the door
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you just got to walk through it the truth is you gotta love what you do every day
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and don't chase things just for the money you can get the money
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but do it through other ways that's my biggest problem social
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media I have kids who come up to me sometimes
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and they're like literally 12 years old
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and they're like oh we're gonna go pop Dom Pérignon bottles
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and like I'm gonna go to Mykonos I'm gonna go to Namos I'm like my Oh my god, that's cool.
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But I'll be honest with you, like, most of the people who do that tend to be lose -outs.
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It all looks great and the stories and the reels and...
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But the reality is that it's also a dark welt.
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So be conscious of that.
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That's my biggest thing.
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People watch and consume stuff and they build up expectations about what they want to drive to be about.
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And the reality is that...
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It's a...
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It's a utopia and it's not.. it's just not reality.
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If you could give one piece of advice to anyone your age or younger on living a good life, what would that be?
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I'm gonna keep it queens.
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Like, having a good meal, watching a good movie, you know what I mean?
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A roof over your head.
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Good.
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Good life right there.
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You know what I mean?
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That's it.
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I don't need much.
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Living a good life means living for yourself and not living for other people.
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Because I think so much in our 20s is so much about exploring who you are.
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And part of that is not living for yourself, like not walking around being selfish all the time, right?
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Of course, like service to others is like everything that I speak about.
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But when I say living for yourself, it's doing things that you love because you love them.
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I mean, we get one life.
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Why would you try and why would you waste time being somebody else or doing things that you don't enjoy?
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The biggest issue we deal with on planet Earth is being so close -minded about stuff, being afraid of what else is out there.
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And I think that if you just experience it, you understand that like, there's nothing to be afraid of.
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Appreciate it.
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Again, that might not be for you.
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I love living in New York City.
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I don't want to live anywhere else.
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But I love the fact that I get to travel
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and see all those things and see the way other people live and understand that like, you had to live a little bit different, but we're still the same.
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I think that overall it's experiencing things.
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I think that is something I tell everyone of all ages.
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I think that like I'm very very privileged that I get to travel
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and that I live in a city that's so diverse anyway
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But I think like that diversity and
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that ability for me to see the way other people live
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and appreciate the way other people It opens up your worldview
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so much more What is one thing that
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when you were younger you put a lot of importance on and as you've gotten older you realize wasn't actually that important?
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Girls
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Explain I mean like you know girls are important
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but I think like a lot of young men like to chase girls
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and I still do
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but it's like it's opportunity cost this is the one thing
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I learned in economics is the one thing I took away from my major
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so all the effort that you're putting in all the effort
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and time you're putting in chasing women you could be putting into something a lot more productive like starting a business
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so just be aware of your opportunity costs.
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Honestly I think social media is a great thing
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but it's also one of the wealth one of the wealth
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things in our generation the amount of distractions It imposes every day the amount of consumption
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that everyone spends consuming consuming it's it's designed to be addictive Constantly push yourself and I mean yeah,
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I'm I tell people whenever I meet someone and they're like Oh, this guy's famous on tiktok and someone says I don't have tiktok.
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I tell them that's good Like that's good.
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There's literally no reason for you to have unless you're posting
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content You just want to consume tiktok content of other people
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every day people spend hours consuming content every day You're just frying your brain, you know?
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So many incredible people, all their potential is gonna be get killed because they spend
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so much time on social media obsessing all the stuff they don't have
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and you just gotta go out there and just try shit.
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And just cause you're in your 20s, like, always build for the future.
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I mean, yeah, it's just, don't follow normality.
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Powerful.
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From a guy with more than a million followers on TikTok saying not to do it.
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Powerful.
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If you could give one piece of advice to anyone your age or younger on living a good life, what would that be?
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Balance is key.
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Now, as I'm entering my early 30s, I've learned to have all the levers the same from like work,
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health, family, friends, dating.
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Everything's kind of at a good balance right now.
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And when I was in my mid -20s, I was more work.
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family too but health mental health I didn't even know what that was
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so I think now again like getting to this point in
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my life everything I love having a equilibrium with I think surround yourself with good people
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but also know that your relationship with yourself is the most important relationship
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and really cultivate
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that be okay with doing things on your own be okay with being your own biggest cheerleader
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and once you have that relationship down everything else is
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so much better and all the other relationships are so much more meaningful too.
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Be happy get lots of cats
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that's really it uh well I think we all like you
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know eat better than the generation before us did I think we'd exercise more
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and take care of our bodies more the more than the the generation before us did yeah uh
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so i i think we're all on like a good track to live hopefully uh uh long healthy lives um
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but yeah yeah that would
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that would be it be happy to get more cats exactly yeah be happy get more hat get more cats yeah
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What You'll Learn from This Real-Life Conversation
This video of New Yorkers sharing life regrets is a goldmine for shadowspeak practice. You’ll build skills like expressing vulnerability naturally (“I still have no effing clue what I’m doing”) and using conversational phrases to connect with others (“No one has their shit together”). It’s also perfect for IELTS speaking practice—you’ll learn to structure personal stories with emotion, a key part of fluency. Plus, you’ll pick up how to respond to follow-up questions smoothly, just like the speakers do when asked about their 20s and 30s.
Listen For These Connected Sounds
Native speakers often link words or reduce sounds, and this dialogue is full of examples. Notice how “I thought I’d be” becomes “I thot I’d be” (reducing “thought” to “thot”) and “what people think of me” links into “wha’ people thinka me” (dropping the “t” in “what” and blending “of me” to “a me”). These small changes make speech flow, and practicing them with shadow speech will help you sound more natural. Also, listen for the casual contraction “gonna” instead of “going to”—it’s everywhere in real conversations!
Say It Like a Native: Rhythm and Stress
To mirror the speakers’ tone, focus on stressing key words that carry emotion. For example, in “I definitely thought I’d be making a lot of money,” the stress on “definitely” and “a lot of money” shows the speaker’s surprise at their unmet expectations. Use the shadowing technique to copy this rhythm—pause the video, repeat the line, and emphasize the same words. Also, pay attention to the casual pace: native speakers often slow down for important points (“the world is not easy”) and speed up for filler phrases (“you know, like”). This balance makes your speech sound relaxed and confident, just like the New Yorkers in the video.
Whether you’re working on improve English pronunciation or just want to speak more like a local, this clip is a fun, relatable way to practice. Remember: the goal isn’t to copy every word, but to capture the feel of real conversation. So hit play, start shadowing, and let these honest stories guide your speaking skills!
Grammar in this video
The structures the speaker uses most, with the exact words from the video:
| Structure | In the video |
|---|---|
| Present perfect have/has + past participle — a past action that still matters now | I've been · I've always been · I've seen |
| Passive voice be + past participle — the focus is on what happens, not who does it | be filled · was born · is shaped |
| Relative clauses who / which + clause — extra information about a person or thing | someone who feels · kids who come · people who do |
| Superlatives the -est / the most … — the top or bottom of a group | their best · your best · The best |
What is the Shadowing Technique?
Shadowing is a science-backed language learning technique originally developed for professional interpreter training and popularized by polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. The method is simple but powerful: you listen to native English audio and immediately repeat it out loud — like a shadow following the speaker with just a 1–2 second delay. Unlike passive listening or grammar drills, shadowing forces your brain and mouth muscles to simultaneously process and reproduce real speech patterns. Research shows it significantly improves pronunciation accuracy, intonation, rhythm, connected speech, listening comprehension, and speaking fluency — making it one of the most effective methods for IELTS Speaking preparation and real-world English communication.