Shadowing Practice: نحوه رفتار با پارتنر اجتنابی - Learn English Speaking with Video

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36 sentences
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This is you.
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This is your avoidant partner and you are spending your life with them.
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You try and regulate yourself.
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This in here is how much attention
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and love you need in order to be fulfilled as the anxious person or as a secure person.
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This is your avoidant person.
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So you give them the amount of love and attention that you'd expect that you'd want.
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Look at them drowning.
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They're drowning.
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I need space.
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I need space.
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Help me.
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I need space.
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Let's take a break.
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You see what happened there?
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They're engulfed.
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They're not enjoying it.
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They're not having a good time.
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They're not pretending when they say they need space.
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They actually do.
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They're drowning.
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This is them.
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This is what they feel is enough attention, love, and connection for them.
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This is you needing love and attention.
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They're like, I'm going to give her everything I've got.
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i've given out everything i've got you unfulfilled why don't you
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want to spend time with me why don't you want to
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be with me why don't you want to connect with me
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why don't you want to make plans for me you see sometimes you think
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that there is a lack of connection or
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that you've worked on your attachment but it's not working out but the reality is maybe you just aren't a match
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so what can we do we can fill up the avoidant
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and not engulf them when we see they've got too much
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or we can take the water that they give us
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or the emotional connectivity up to here
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and we can fill up the rest with friends with work with hobbies if the avoidant is worth it for you

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Key Speaking Skills to Build from This Video

This clip helps you practice two critical skills: expressing emotional needs clearly and responding to conversational cues. For example, phrases like "I need space" and "why don't you want to connect" require precise intonation to convey urgency or confusion—skills vital for IELTS speaking practice. You'll also learn to adjust your speech to match a partner's pace, a must for natural communication.

Listen For These Connected Speech Patterns

The dialogue uses common reductions and linking that native speakers use. Notice how "I've got" becomes "I've got" (with a soft "v" sound) and "let's take a break" links "take a" into "tay-ka". Phrases like "they're drowning" blend "they're" into "they're" (reducing the "re" to a schwa). These patterns are key to understanding fast speech, making them perfect for shadow speak practice.

Say It Like a Native: Rhythm and Stress

To mirror the speaker's natural flow, focus on stressing key words. In "I need space", stress "need" and "space" to emphasize urgency. In "why don't you want to spend time with me", stress "why", "want", and "time" to convey emotion. Practice shadowing these lines repeatedly—use a shadowing site to record yourself and compare. This helps build the rhythm needed for fluency, whether for casual conversations or IELTS speaking practice. Remember, the goal is to balance clarity with naturalness, just like the speaker does when explaining emotional dynamics.

By focusing on these elements, you'll not only improve your English speaking but also learn to communicate with empathy—an added bonus for real-world interactions. Whether you're using shadow speech techniques or practicing with a partner, this video offers practical, actionable steps to boost your skills.

What is the Shadowing Technique?

Shadowing is a science-backed language learning technique originally developed for professional interpreter training and popularized by polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. The method is simple but powerful: you listen to native English audio and immediately repeat it out loud — like a shadow following the speaker with just a 1–2 second delay. Unlike passive listening or grammar drills, shadowing forces your brain and mouth muscles to simultaneously process and reproduce real speech patterns. Research shows it significantly improves pronunciation accuracy, intonation, rhythm, connected speech, listening comprehension, and speaking fluency — making it one of the most effective methods for IELTS Speaking preparation and real-world English communication.

Shadowing technique: read the full step-by-step guide →