Практика Shadowing: I CAN'T CLOSE MY BANK ACCOUNT | Gautham Govindan | Stand-Up Comedy - Изучайте разговорный английский по видео
Создание урока...
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I've reached a point where I'm not worried about my screen time anymore, let me be honest.
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I've made peace of the fact that half my brain belongs to Meta
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or Google or whoever can hook me with a toing sound.
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My bigger concern is that because I'm spending so much time on screens, I'm losing a lot of skills that I gained in the past, right?
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One of the things I've lost is my handwriting, guys.
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Oh my, it's gone.
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In my defense, I never had it, okay?
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Because I write with my left hand, I'm a left-hander, and I don't write like this, I write like this.
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Left arm around the wicket.
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And as if this is not awkward enough, every time I write, my tongue also comes around.
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Nip of the mind.
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If you're a left-hander, if you're knowing left-handers, you always see, they always hold the pen little weirdly.
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Like most of them hold it like me, like doggy style, they hold it.
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They hold it like chopsticks.
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Some people, their whole body goes to cursive.
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And it's not because we want to please the pen or anything, okay?
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It's because if we write like how you right-handers write, right?
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Whatever, you know, missionary.
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All the ink ends up coming here.
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Right?
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Because when you write, before the ink dries, this Gillette Mark III aloe vera gel strip You're writing and erasing at the same time.
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This becomes an encryption software.
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End-to-end encryption.
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So strong, even you don't know what you wrote.
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So I have to write like this.
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It looks awkward.
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People think I'm showing off when I write like this.
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They look at me, they're like, wow!
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Oh!
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Watham, you can ride with your left also?
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Actually, I can ride with my right hand as well, because if you're in school, and you ride like you're possessed by an evil spirit,
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they try to convert you. And you know what?
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They could just told me, hey, just ride with your right hand.
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You know how they try to convert me?
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They sat a girl over here. Do you get it?
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For me to go like this, my elbow would have reached places that would lead to other elbows coming to my face.
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So I wrote with right hand, one year I wrote with my right hand.
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Bad handwriting there also by the way.
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Yeah, the school concluded that my thoughts have bad handwriting.
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I can write with both hands, but I'm not ambidextrous.
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Ambidextrous is when you can write well with both hands.
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I can write shit with both hands.
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I'm ambi-illiterate.
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All my appendages are dumb.
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But now, guys, my current handwriting, you should, I mean, I hope you don't see it, because my current handwriting should be acceptable only on the walls of a cave.
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Next to some dinosaur bones or something.
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If you see my handwriting, you will guess I'm a lefty, but you will guess left leg. Or left nostril.
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Because I saw my handwriting recently because I had to close an old bank account of mine.
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I had a 10 year old bank account which had 7 rupees in it and with the power of compound interest
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It's now 9 rupees guys If you want any more financial advice please give me also
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Sir, I'm filling up that form Oh my god Every bone in my arm is paining.
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I'm losing hope in between a sentence.
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I'm writing my address like 73, second floor.
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Etcetera.
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No two words look the same.
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All different fonts.
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One is Times New Roman.
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One is Comic Sans.
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One is Devanagri.
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Script essay.
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I finished the form.
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You know what my form looked like?
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It looked like a ransom note, a kidnapper's hands.
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You know what I'm talking about?
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The note they send the police, send this much money or we'll kill you.
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They cut words from different places and they stick it together.
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Isn't that hilarious, guys?
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That in an intense situation of a kidnapping, one bastard is doing art and crafts over there.
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Everybody's like, oh, oh, this guy's like, mm-mm-mm.
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Oh, oh, oh, oh.
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Hmm.
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Kill.
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By the way, scissors is also, it's a right-handed instrument.
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I don't know if you know that, right?
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If you cut it, the left-hand paper doesn't cut.
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It just folds, like, why you...
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Why are you cutting?
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That's my biggest nightmare.
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If I get called to inaugurate a store or something.
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Oh man, so embarrassing it will be.
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I'll end up opening the store like I open a lace packet.
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I finished the form, next obstacle came.
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I forgot my signature.
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Guys, let me ask you one thing.
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Why have we moved away from thumbprint?
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Right?
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If we use a thumbprint as a sign of illiteracy, right?
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But when Apple puts on the phone, you're like, Oh wow, genius!
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Security!
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Imagine every time you had to unlock your phone, you had to sign.
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Your phone will forever be locked.
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You take your phone like,
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Ahhhh And now your phone is locked for 3 minutes because of so many incorrect tries.
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Oh, okay.
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Now you forgot what you wanted to lock and lock your phone for.
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Oh, ambulance.
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Yeah, hello?
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I'm telling you dude, like, it's better.
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The thumbprint is better, right?
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Everybody has their own, you don't have to learn it.
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You can't forge a thumbprint.
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Right?
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I mean, it'll be pretty obvious when you carry a separate thumb in your pocket.
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What is mine only?
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I'm Hrithik.
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See, I'm team thumbprint.
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Okay?
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Because see, if I do a thumbprint, people will be like, oh, he might be illiterate.
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But if I sign, people will be like, he is illiterate.
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Because I don't have a sign.
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Because when I was a kid, I was so good at copying my mom and dad's signature that I forgot to work on my own.
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So now every sign is different.
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The G is there.
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Gautam's G is there.
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But after that, guys, it's wherever the pen takes me.
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Before signing, I look at the other person like, are you ready?
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Because the journey we both embark on together.
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Right?
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It can be anything.
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It can be Gautam, it can be Gautam, go and then, if I'm feeling like a loser that day, Gautam Gambhir also comes out.
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I'm telling you.
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It's mostly a jazz signature. But I signed.
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Whatever I thought my signature was, I signed over there.
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Right?
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And this bang guy, he looked at his monitor which had my sign from 10 years back.
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And he was like, Oh, the signs don't match.
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And I was like, of course.
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It's been 10 years.
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Aren't you happy that I've changed as a person?
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He's like, no, no, no. The signs have to match.
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What if you're a fraud? for 9 rupees?
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Even if you think I'm a fraud, what kind of low ambition crime do you think I'm doing?
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He's like, no, no, no, no. Signs have to match.
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I was like, give me another paper.
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I signed over there.
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He was like, signs don't match.
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I was like, bro, just show me the monitor.
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I can copy really well.
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No, I can't show you the monitor, but I can give you a clue.
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You.
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He was like, before, you didn't have two dots below your signature.
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Now you have.
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Why?
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Why do I have two dots?
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For extended pleasure, I have two dots.
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I don't know why I have it.
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I just like doing it.
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That's my real sign and I sign whatever, I do, and I'm like, check it out.
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Signature of a real jerk.
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I'll tell you what, I copied it, I'll be honest.
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I copied it from Amitabh Bachchan.
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Amitabh Bachchan is a convert.
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He's a left-hander, he converted a right-hand.
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And if you see in KBC, he signs all these checks like, he bounces his pen.
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In my case, the check also bounces, but like, how much can you copy?
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Everything is going, man.
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Handwriting is gone.
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Signature is gone.
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Attention is gone.
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Don't you guys think so?
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No. No?
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Who said no?
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You.
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You have good attention.
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You meditate and all.
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That's nice man.
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Why am I shitting on someone who's doing life well?
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Oh, you have a good life or what?
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No, no, I get so easily distracted, man.
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Dude, I get distracted by the sound my phone makes when it's on silent mode.
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My ears are tuned to
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that The sweet sound of a mouthful of paan You know,
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and you know what, it's worse than loud mode, okay?
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Because at least in loud mode, every notification sounds different So you know what you're getting Here, everything, same sound Your girlfriend sends you a disappearing image?
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Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm Your relative passed away?
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Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Both very different feelings!
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Both went away too soon, but very different!
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No!
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No!
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No!
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Shit!
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It's just so bad man, But you know, I am such a hypocrite you know, Because I get so easily distracted,
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But I expect 100 percent attention from people in front of me It's so bad, And it's not even a show setting right?
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Like recently I was talking to a friend outside on the road and while I was talking to him, he looked at his watch.
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A part of me dies.
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I got angry at him.
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I was like, why did I ask you the time?
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Even if I asked, look at the sun and tell me.
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Because no one looks at their watch when they're having fun, right?
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No one is like, How much more fun can I have?
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but I get it man, nobody like we all know the very fidgety we are like you look at your watch, check your food and all this
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because you can't have a dull moment in your life anymore you just know
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that there's a meme there
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that can heal you that's how much content is there right now there's
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so much content out there these days that
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if you watch a reel right and you like it but you forget to like it It's gone, forever, never to be seen again.
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It happened to me recently, I was watching a reel, hilarious reel.
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It was two dogs were twerking and one turned back and winked at Neil.
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I was about to like it but I got a phone call, I picked it up, came back, gone, reel is gone.
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Now like a psycho, I'm searching for it on Google.
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Have you seen the reel where there are two dogs twerking?
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And one looks back and winks at me and Google is like, what a mental health professional is near me.
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I'm like, no!
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There's so much lack of attention these days, a lot of people think they have ADHD now.
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Right?
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ADHD, if you don't know, it is attention deficit hyperactivity disorder.
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It's a mental condition where you can't pay attention to things, you lose focus very quickly.
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It's also the mental condition that's in fashion right now.
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Everybody likes to have it.
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they watch a couple of freezes and they self-diagnose.
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They're like, oh, me also?
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I also start things and don't finish.
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They're like, yeah, yeah.
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That's a different disease.
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That's not ADHD.
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That's LAZY.
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Relax.
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But I don't know if you've noticed, every couple of years, a new mental condition comes in fashion.
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Like, remember two years back when everybody, the whole world had OCD, remember that?
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Everybody was like, oh, so much OCD.
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Here I have OCD.
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Every morning, I have to brush my teeth, I have OCD.
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Dude, it became so fashionable that people started asking other people, What's your OCD?
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What's your obsessive compulsive disorder?
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It's like going to a cancer hospital and being like, Oh, which flavor cancer can...
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You get it?
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But mental conditions are coming in fashion, man.
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The reason why it comes in fashion is very simple, right? because it's not physically, you can't spot it.
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It's very easy to fake it.
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If someone tells you that they have ADHD, you can be like, oh, where?
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Oh, turn around.
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Aha, there.
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This is my ADHD.
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So they take one symptom and they extrapolate that they have ADHD.
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That's why you'll never see physical conditions come in fashion.
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You'll never hear anybody going like, oh, I think I have rabies.
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Why?
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I'm thirsty, that's why.
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But the biggest reason why You know, mental conditions come in fashion is because it's a very easy way for people to excuse their bad behavior.
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You'll hear a lot of that.
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You'll hear like, Oh, I'm sorry, I forgot to return your call.
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I have ADHD.
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Like, ha ha ha.
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Which D stands for dick in that?
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No, I'm very passionate about ADHD because my girlfriend has ADHD.
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She has the premium version, the good one.
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Horrible condition to have.
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I see her struggle with attention and focus every day.
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Amazing condition to be in a relationship with.
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Because I have the power to distract her at will.
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We don't fight.
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Any time a fight starts, I'm like, Aaaaah!
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Just runs away like a cat.
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I mean, it's a bug for her.
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It's a feature for me.
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Having a positive mindset.
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I'll tell you, I'll give you another example.
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Especially people with ADHD, they can't stop doomsdaying.
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Any event, they always think of how many ways it can go wrong.
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For example, if she helps me pack for a trip or something, even if it's a one-day trip, she'll pack as if on my way to the destination,
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North Korea launches a nuclear strike and I have to be underground for two months.
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I'm not even kidding, recently I had a one-day trip to Hyderabad and then I had a show over there.
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I called her, I was like, you know, I have a headache, I have to go to the pharmacy.
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And like a magician, she was like, check your bag, left pocket.
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That's what them all is there.
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And I was like, oh wow.
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Actually, anyway, I have to go to the pharmacy, I had to buy a nail cutter.
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Check your bag, right pocket.
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Fifth army knife is there.
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Actually, I had a bad show, I don't want to go back home.
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Check your laptop compartment, rope and stool is there.
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You have planned everything.
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No, and it's good because I don't like packing.
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Okay, I'm not a big fan of packing.
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I hate it actually.
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And not the physical act of it, the mathematics of packing I hate.
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Like I'll give you an example.
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Here one day in Mumbai I am, right?
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For the last one week I was thinking how many underwear I should carry.
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Simple, right?
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One day trip means one underwear.
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But now the overthinking starts, what if it starts raining?
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Two underwear.
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What if I decide to do the first ever split in my life?
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Three underwear?
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What if a friend asked me, Hey, can I have your underwear?
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Four underwear?
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Dude, if she's not in my life, I would have packed a bag with ten jockeys and a toothbrush and come like I'm a distributor.
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They would have stopped me at the airport.
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The bag would have gone through the X-Ray machine and come out to the other side.
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I'd be like, what happened, sir?
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They're like, you tell me what happened.
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Explain the toothbrush actually actually
Контекст и фон
В недавнем стендапе Гаутама Говиндана обсуждаются непростые моменты, связанные с современным использованием технологий и изменением навыков, таких как письмо от руки. Он затрагивает темы, которые могут быть знакомы многим, такие как неудобства, связанные с письмом левой рукой, и как непривычные привычки формируют наш опыт. Этот стендап не только развлекает, но и даёт немного интересных языковых конструкций, которые подойдут для практики английского.
Топ-5 фраз для повседневного общения
- “I’ve reached a point where I’m not worried about…” – Это выражение можно использовать, чтобы начать говорить о ваших текущих мыслях и чувствах.
- “I can write with both hands, but I’m not ambidextrous.” – Это хорошая фраза для обсуждения своих навыков и умений.
- “My handwriting should be acceptable only on the walls of a cave.” – Эта фраза добавляет юмора к обсуждению навыков письма.
- “Because if you write like how you right-handers write…” – Полезное выражение для обозначения отличий между левшами и правшами.
- “I can ride with my right hand as well…” – Интересный способ обсудить свои способности и недостатки языковым образом.
Пошаговое руководство по шадоу-спичу
Для успешного освоения стендапа Гаутама через метод shadow speak следуйте этим шагам:
- Прослушивание: Сначала прослушайте видео несколько раз, чтобы понять общий контекст и настроение.
- Повторение: Используйте shadowing английский, повторяя за спикером, следя за интонацией и ритмом.
- Запись: Запишите свой голос во время повторения, чтобы проанализировать свои ошибки и улучшить произношение.
- Практика с партнёром: Найдите друга для практики, чтобы обсудить услышанное и использовать новые фразы в живом общении.
- Регулярность: Уделяйте этому занятию время каждый день, чтобы развивать уверенность и навыки shadowspeaks.
Применяя эти советы, вы не только улучшите свои разговорные навыки, но и сможете весело провести время, обучаясь.
Что такое техника Shadowing?
Shadowing — это научно обоснованная техника изучения языка, изначально разработанная для подготовки профессиональных переводчиков и популяризированная полиглотом доктором Александром Аргуэльесом. Метод прост, но эффективен: вы слушаете аудио на английском от носителей языка и немедленно повторяете вслух — как тень, следующая за говорящим с задержкой в 1–2 секунды. В отличие от пассивного прослушивания или грамматических упражнений, Shadowing заставляет мозг и мышцы рта одновременно обрабатывать и воспроизводить реальные речевые паттерны. Исследования показывают, что это значительно улучшает точность произношения, интонацию, ритм, связную речь, понимание на слух и беглость речи — что делает его одним из самых эффективных методов для подготовки к IELTS Speaking и реального общения на английском.