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It's very easy to romanticize a faraway place or a job or a version of ourselves like,

oh, once I go there or once I have that or once I'm this age or once I find that person, then I'll be happy or then things will make sense.

I really just don't think that life works that way.

I believe that there's a balance.

I believe that understanding and processing our emotions is a very important part of our life,

but I don't think that we should bow down to them and live by them as truth because they're not.

A lot of the time, they're not based on truth.

Are we willing to humble ourselves?

Are we willing to be embarrassed?

Are we willing to be vulnerable?

Are we willing to fall down and get up and try again?

Are we willing to do it one way and then maybe do it another way?

Are we willing to experiment?

Are we willing to meet different types of people, put ourselves out there, put our art out there, put our efforts, whatever they may be,

this whole journey of moving towards what I want to do has built me up

and it has broken me down and it's split me open and it showed me, okay, this is how I really feel about myself, about my work.

What is separating you from your dream?

Is it that uncomfortable, scary in between of the risks, the change, going towards what we want shows us

why we don't have it yet and and where it is

that we need to be right now and the lessons

that we need to learn right now i can make mistakes

and that doesn't mean that i'm not cut out for what it is

that i want to do it means that i'm working on it

and that i can still actively pursue what it is

that i want even

when it doesn't look perfect we get there through accepting where we're at now and embracing it and using these feelings,

transmuting these feelings, accepting these feelings.

We talked about the reality of change,

and with that comes so many different emotions, excitement,

grief all of these things that i have been experiencing i can be feeling low

and also continue to move through my life move through my day continue to witness new experiences

and things even if i'm afraid or even if i'm uncomfortable

or anxious or any of these negative emotions I think so much of the time we let them scare us.

We let them stop us.

We say, oh, I don't want to make that change because it's going to be uncomfortable.

It's going to be scary.

It's going to cause me to have to maybe make a psychological change or a physical change.

And there's even discomfort in experiencing positive new things like meeting new people or going to a new place.

Everything comes with its ups and downs.

Recently, what's been bringing me a lot of peace is not forcing myself to feel a certain way

or to not feel a certain way, allowing all of it to be able to be true at once.

Because that's life, nothing ever stays the same, and that may be obvious,

but that feels like a truth that I'm really learning these days that I, at first, I was like, oh that means I can't count on anything,

and how can I ever feel stable if I'm always really living in the unknown, but I don't think it has to be scary that way.

I think we can bring ourselves into the present moment and accept, realize that it's okay to be afraid, it's okay whatever does come up in the unknown.

I've been trying to sit with that.

Instead of intellectualizing the feelings that come up in me, in my life, in my experiences, I tend to do that.

It kind of feels like maybe I'll have a feeling good or bad and then it immediately wants to become a thought.

I want to intellectualize it.

I want to understand it

and I feel like I've been getting better at just accepting it as it is for what it is,

not forcing things, just accepting that all of these things can exist at once.

And it definitely, this has all definitely come up now, being in a big city and having my own personal experience,

but also witnessing around me that there are so many things happening at once.

So many different people, so many different missions and daily tasks and jobs and opportunities and conversations and people sitting at cafes,

people working, people walking, people on the train, people on the bus, people in cars.

It's just constantly

moving and going and going and this is always happening

but I think being in an environment where I'm surrounded by

that and I'm witnessing so many different lives and

so many different things happening at once it's it's kind of mirroring back to me

that like acceptance that I'm having with myself and all of my feelings

and emotions I I'm seeing it take place around me as well,

and for so long I would hear people talk about how maybe they were chasing a dream or an accomplishment,

a goal, and when they finally reached it, they were a bit disappointed.

It didn't feel the way that they thought it would, and I guess that is kind of what I'm facing,

is that situation of wherever you go, you bring yourself.

It's very easy to romanticize a faraway place or a job or a version of ourselves like,

oh once I go there or once I have that or once I'm this age or once I find that person, then I'll be happy or then things will make sense

or then I can allow myself to do x y

and z and i really just don't think that life works

that way i feel like i've been hit with that realization time

and time again one of my friends um we had breakfast before i left for my trip

and he kind of said this to me he has a

bit of a harsh way of of speaking sometimes about these things are not harsh, but just blatant and honest.

And he was like, you know,

don't be disappointed if things suck or if you feel awful when you go move to another city or,

you know, don't be, don't expect anything, just allow it to be.

And that's a lot easier said than done, especially for someone who likes to visualize and romanticize and plan.

I wanted things to

go a certain way and it's good to have intentions and

and to move with those

but also I'm learning the art of acceptance I think it's

allowing me to move through life a bit more freely

and to experience life more fully you know people always say be present be in the moment this

and that and I think that's hard for a lot of people to do

because we're constantly caught up in social media and work

and what do we have to do how do we have to prepare what's going on this this

that like keeping ourselves in this survival mode go go go

it's it's hard sometimes to just let ourselves be present

and it's something that i've i've really thought about for a long time reading you know eckhart tolle

and all these different types of philosophies that really come down to enlightenment being sourced from the present moment,

from being present, from, you know, feeling there's different exercises.

You notice all of the things that you can see, all of the things that you can hear.

What do you feel on your skin?

How do your clothes feel on you?

Doing that one at a time, like first you do everything you can see.

This really helps if you're ever feeling anxious, overwhelmed, overstimulated.

You do everything you can see first, and then everything you can hear,

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and then what you feel physically, I think.

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I hope I'm not butchering this.

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I think that's how it goes.

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By the end, once you do those three separately, you bring them all together in one.

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And I find that to be a nice exercise getting in the present moment, but sometimes we don't really feel like we have time for this

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and we don't make the constant effort to bring ourselves back in to what's happening now.

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Accepting how I'm feeling has helped me be more present

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because I find myself constantly trying to push away my anxiety and trying to,

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you know, getting mad at myself for not enjoying or not being more positive or not being more productive.

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Like I waste so much time beating myself up for how I actually feel

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that it kind of just suppresses it and suppresses it until it builds up

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and there's a deeper issue at the end of the day, it all comes up and I don't want to do that.

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Um, like I've said, and there's a difference between acceptance and enabling.

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I don't think that we should live under the whim of our feelings

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and let that dictate our every move and hold our emotional state as a constant truth.

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I don't believe that that is, I believe that there's a balance.

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I believe that understanding and processing our emotions is a very important part of our life, but I don't think that we should bow down to them

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and live by them as truth

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because they're not a lot of the time they're not based

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on truth they're based on how our nervous system is trying to survive

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or how we're interpreting this life

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and just it's very personal you know there's a difference between processing

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and then acting out of the feelings all of the time

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when i say an acceptance i don't mean just saying okay i accept

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that i'm angry so i'm just going to act out of my anger

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and i'm going to continue to enable this feeling over and over again.

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I don't mean it like that.

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I mean it that instead of pushing something down, pushing something down, avoiding it, trying to run away from it,

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having some acceptance that it's there.

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I'm feeling this for a reason.

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We can look into it.

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We don't have to intellectualize it and obsess over it or run away from it or be afraid of it,

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but just realizing that it's there and everything can be true.

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And the reason that I am thinking about this so much is

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because I am in a place that I have always wanted to be and that I find so much beauty in,

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so much joy, like I said, just being surrounded by so many different people and

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so many different lives happening at once and many different flowers

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and different parks and buildings and neighborhoods and areas

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and people in my mind it didn't make sense to be in an environment

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that i love so much and also feel grief

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or also feel heartbroken or also feel angry at myself

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or feel shame i just those two didn't mix for me

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i said no i i'm not allowed i did i wasn't allowing myself to feel those things because I just,

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I thought that that would be taking away from my experience and that that would be doing myself a disservice,

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which in a way, like, it is true.

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I think, like I said, intention is important and I really do have the intention of continuing to make the most of my days while I'm here.

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I think that's another thing is I know that I have limited time where I'm at,

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so that's kind of another internal pressure that causes a lot of shame to come up and like, why am I feeling the way that I'm feeling?

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Just like that internal conflict.

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But the way that we get the most out of our time

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and out of our life and out of our everyday is feeling it all, accepting it as it is.

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And it's okay.

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I guess I'm realizing that the dream that I was always chasing and searching for, the reality of what that looks like,

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it can all be part of the dream.

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you know like today i went to the flower market

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and i got these wonderful hydrangeas and the sea lavender

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and before that

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when i was on my walk to the train i was crying about something been crying all morning

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but still running off to a meeting that i have and it can all exist together.

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I've been really emotional this morning and we're doing it anyways.

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We're gonna go meet a new person, go to the flower market.

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I've been wiping my tears away.

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It can all exist together.

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And instead of being so upset and letting that ruin my day, I'm gonna let it move through me.

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I'm going to accept that yes, I was really anxious and upset this morning And I also walked to the train.

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I got on I went to a new part of town I got these flowers.

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I met up with a new friend

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and I did it anyways I didn't let it stop me

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and i've noticed that when I suppress those emotions and

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when I try to push them away and when I try to pretend like they don't exist, they do come up in a way that ends up stopping me from doing things.

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It just, it gets pent up and it becomes more powerful and that can inhibit me from living my life.

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So I, this is what I mean by this art of acceptance, letting it happen.

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That's all we can really do in this life.

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For so long, I was so afraid of feeling emotions organically.

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I thought, no, I'm going to curate a place in time to feel grief or to feel sad.

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I know that sounds kind of crazy, but I just didn't, I was overwhelmed at the idea of life happening to me

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and letting it happen and letting these emotions such as grief or anxiety or like any of these feelings,

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jealousy, embarrassment, all the things that we've talked about in these episodes.

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I feel like I intellectualized them so much that I wanted to curate when I could feel them, when I was allowed to feel them

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and I was afraid to let life happen to me organically and to experience it and let it move through me.

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I wanted to control my experience somehow

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and it's definitely a process learning to let go of that

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and learning to let things in and through but that's what getting closer

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and closer to my dream and everything

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that I've ever wanted has shown me is it doesn't look like some perfect picture in your mind, but yes, the beautiful parts exist.

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Yes, the excitement is there.

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All of the glorious things exist, and also some really sad things do too,

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and new experiences that you've never felt before also are there.

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It can all exist in one, and this city is teaching me that in a physical

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and emotional sense it's so easy to give up on a dream

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and say okay that's not for me because it means

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that i have to be more confident or that i have to

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or i don't know i guess a common thing

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that i hear with like artists and goals that we have

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or creative pursuits and it doesn't have to just be creative just anything in life

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when we're working towards something or we have a vision in our mind, I think we keep it far away or we keep ourselves separate from it because we realize,

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oh, I actually have to become confident in myself

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or I actually have to make that scary leap or decision

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or risk or be willing to let go of something in order to bring something else in.

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And when we try, sometimes it doesn't feel the way

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that we thought it would like

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or maybe i could just talk about my my own example

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of this would be i since i was very young i

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always envisioned myself on a stage performing my poetry i love

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music i love literature i love all these things i've not

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ever really i never want to say never never want to say never i am very interested in music

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and music production it continues as i grow older to intrigue me more and more.

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I'm going to acquire skills in different, all different mediums that I'm interested in,

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but I have to say that I never really had a dream of singing on a stage or something like that.

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It was always doing some sort of reading, sharing poetry, sharing a story, and having other elements involved in it as well,

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such as nature or maybe theatrics, maybe music, maybe color,

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photography video like all these different elements that has always been my dream

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and i've always envisioned myself doing it on a stage in front of many people

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and that was a vision that comforted me and brought me excitement

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and joy and was fun to think about and then the more

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that i kept moving towards that dream the more real it got

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and i think that's when that's when we get a little scared is when things start to get real, when things, you know, start to challenge us.

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It's challenge, you know, we challenge what we're really willing to go through and to do.

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Are we willing to humble ourselves?

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Are we willing to be embarrassed?

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Are we willing to be vulnerable?

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Are we willing to fall down and get up and try again?

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Are we willing to do it one way and then maybe do it another way?

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Are we willing to experiment?

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Are we willing to meet different types of people, put ourselves out there, put our art out there, put our efforts, whatever they may be out there.

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And what does that mean?

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How will we be perceived?

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How will we perceive ourselves?

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You know, I feel like this whole journey of moving towards what I want to do has built me up

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and it has broken me down and it's, it's split me open and it showed me, okay, this is how I really feel about myself,

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about my work, about how I feel about presenting it to others or interacting with others.

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Like the essence of the show, my first episode that I ever did was confidence is uncomfortable.

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And my whole message with that is to be confident,

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we have to take a look and see what's going on there.

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What is keeping us from that?

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What is separating you from your dream? is it

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that uncomfortable scary in between of the risks the change dr joe dispensa i i like the way

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that he talks about the mind and how it's like an animal

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and it runs on a certain circuit even if it's causing destruction

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or bringing us to a place in life

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that we don't want to be in

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or how we don't want to see things if our mind

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and my therapist actually just talked about this too if our mind is on a circuit that it has learned,

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it's going to keep going until we make a conscious effort to change the story, to change the circuit.

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And sometimes that requires going over and over and over again.

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And I remember I had a religious friend who God was something that psychologically aided her.

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And she said it was like a constant surrender.

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And I think about that in this psychological sense of it all as well of like

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if you want to change your life if you want to change your mind

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or change the way you're moving towards your goals

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or how you feel it can feel like a constant redirection a constant surrender to the unknown

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or to whatever you believe in or to the dream

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that you're following this is not just a one

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and done like oh this is what i want to do

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and i'm gonna go do it it's it will really i mean i guess it depends what it is

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that you're you're after but i i think a lot of the time going towards what we want shows us

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why we don't have it yet and and where it is

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that we need to be right now and the lessons

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that we need to learn right now and that's why i'm

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so grateful and i do feel like despite the fact

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that i have made mistakes and the process has been anything but perfect but it is all part of the journey.

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It's all part of the dream.

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All of these uncomfortable feelings that are coming up for me and that I'm moving through, it's showing me the work, it's showing me the path,

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it's showing me what is within me and maybe keeping me from what I'm after.

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I can make mistakes and that doesn't mean that I'm not cut out for what it is that I want to do.

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It means that I'm working on it and that I can still actively pursue what it is that I want,

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even when it doesn't look perfect.

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Like I said, I've just kept myself in this little bubble of shame and that makes me feel stagnant.

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It makes me stagnant whenever these emotions pile up and whenever I, you know, have this sort of looming cloud of disapproval over me,

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like I'm not good enough or I'm not doing enough or that I'm, you know, too insecure, that I'm too scared or whatever.

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And it's like, why can't all of that be true?

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I can be very scared and I can do it at the same time.

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And that's what I'm showing myself these days is not every day is going to look the same

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and the beautiful things can exist alongside alongside the ugly

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and I no longer want to be afraid of those feelings

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or let them hold me back or let them keep me stagnant or stuck.

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That dream version of ourselves or the dream

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that we're chasing doesn't have to be separate from everything that we're going through and that we're feeling.

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I think it's about bridging them together, finding that middle in between of what's keeping you

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from that vision and how can we bring it into the present it doesn't mean

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that there's not room for improvement and

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that we won't change you know we've talked all about change

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and it's inevitably happening we are going to develop as we continue to move through life

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but why are we keeping ourselves stuck saying

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that oh you know i i want this

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but like i could never be brave enough to do that

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or it's too embarrassing or I don't like how are we going to get there

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if we're keeping ourselves separate from the dream we get there through accepting where we're at now

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and embracing it and using these feelings transmuting these feelings accepting these feelings

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and continuing to move forward and that's what I am doing even

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if I am angry at myself or I feel like I have made certain mistakes

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or I don't really understand what's coming up for me, it doesn't mean that I still can't get up,

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that I still can't take myself to do something or have a new experience.

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Here I am walking my favorite streets in the world in my favorite area of London

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and I am heartbroken over the same person and I'm angry

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and I'm sad and I'm mad at myself for making certain decisions.

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Decisions have consequences, you know, and you have to live them and that's what I'm doing right now.

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Life is not always fair and it doesn't make sense

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and it's confusing and it's angering and I'm trying not to cry

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and just accept that all of it can exist at once and be true.

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I can be in my favorite place in the world

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and I can also be facing the consequences for my actions

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and being angry and looking like a crazy American vlogger on the street

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and and all of it all of it can exist in one

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and I'm just trying to accept that reality instead of hating myself for it

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It's just really frustrating that whenever you pay so much money

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and mental effort to be somewhere but you decide to with the person

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that you're trying to get over right before you leave and then you feel like this. So stupid.

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I don't think that we should just wait until we feel like it's the right moment

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or whenever we feel like we're ready

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because like i i never felt truly ready to take a step like this

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or to even put myself out there

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or my art out there there was not a moment where i was like okay i'm strong enough now

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or okay i'm confident enough now no i was i was

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doing it in the midst of insecurity in the midst of confusion

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or feeling really vulnerable like it's not confidence doesn't come magically falling down from the sky like it's something

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that we we move towards

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that you know that's why people say fake it until you make it that's where we're trying to be

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but the reality is maybe we don't always feel that way, but doing it anyways.

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And I've talked about all of this, doing it anyways, and you decide, and I never want to sound repetitive, and I'm sorry if I do,

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but that message has continued to come up in my mind.

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I decide what I'm capable of.

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I don't always decide what happens in my life or how I feel about it, but I do have choices.

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I can continue to take action even

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when i don't feel like it we've literally we've talked about

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all of this i have episodes about all of these different elements of the journey

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and all of these different philosophies

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but it's interesting it's just it's crazy how it all comes together

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and i i see how much i get to choose

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and it doesn't mean i get to choose how i'm feeling or what's happening around me, but I get to choose how I continue to move forward,

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and yeah, I'm accepting where I'm at instead of trying to force change or force myself to be something else, be present in my surroundings,

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in my body, in my feelings, that's really what I'm working on, like I told you in the beginning, is not having to intellectualize every feeling that comes up,

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letting my body feel what it needs to feel

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and move through life and i always tell you guys how nature

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and flowers inspire me to do this they inspire me to

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let myself go through the natural cycles of life whether

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that is blooming and colorful or you know something dying

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and letting it go and being recycled back into the earth again to create new life, like these cycles exist everywhere and they exist within us

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and I think the more that we try to push against them or force them away, like there's so many things that I didn't want to feel for a really long time

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and that influenced the way that I moved through life.

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I had certain habits that were not healthy because I did not want to accept how I was feeling, I didn't want to feel it.

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I think now I've put myself in certain positions where I've had no choice and it's been grueling, but it's also been a gift.

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And it's a humbling journey getting to where we want to go

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and whatever we're fantasizing about getting to that place does not always feel good and it's not always shiny.

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Sometimes I get frustrated

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because social media just seems to be an outlet for people to just showcase the good

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and the shiny and the end product, but not necessarily the process there.

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We all do it.

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Like when you look at my Instagram, it looks like I have some great artistic flowering life.

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And sure, those are elements of it.

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And for that, I am forever thankful.

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But how did that come to be?

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I'll look at kind of the affirmations or the wishes that I wrote down in my journal.

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I want to be a philosopher.

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I want to be a philosophical poet, whatever.

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That sounded like a great fun dream when I was younger, but what does it actually mean to be that

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and to like understand life like that and to break it down

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and to interpret it and to experience it and to feel it and to record it and to put it out there, that's a whole thing.

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And sometimes like you don't see, well, hopefully you do because I try to be, that's why I feel fulfilled by what I do here on

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YouTube is I try to be as vulnerable as possible

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and to kind of break the journey down and to analyze it a bit and to showcase the beauty and the hardship.

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And I'll always try to do that.

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But yeah whenever you see certain things on social media

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or like an artist that you look up to

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or whatever it may be it's like there's

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so much going on behind all of it like my poetry collection

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that i'm so proud of was a product of so much pain

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and heartbreak and allowing myself to feel that and then being able to articulate it,

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like that's what I've asked for in this life to do.

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And I guess it's just, it's not always, it's not always pretty.

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In fact, it's rarely pretty.

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Maybe the end product is pretty, but it can be an ugly process.

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And I think that's just what I'm trying to say is accepting it all as a whole.

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Maybe the journey to your dreams is not as shiny as you imagined it would be as a kid, but these are all steps these are all parts of the process

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and while I've been here I've been watching Hacks

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and I know the show came out a while ago

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and I am late to the party here guys but

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that show has really just empowered and inspired me so much

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because I just I mean I could talk about it for a

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while but I feel like it really just showcases success

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and also being a woman and a creative or whatever like it's not just handed to you.

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It's not easy in any sense.

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And that doesn't mean it's not beautiful and enjoyable at times and rewarding and fulfilling.

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The journey is, but it's also embarrassing and scary and ugly and not fun sometimes.

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And I just, I love that show so much.

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There's so many examples of this and of bringing a goal or a dream or success to fruition, but that's one, that's a show that I've been really enjoying recently.

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It's been inspiring me to not give up when things feel impossible, when you can't see the way out, or when you don't know how it's going to come to fruition,

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continuing to believe in it anyways and accept the journey as a whole is what will always bring us closer.

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And it also, it uncovers so much about what the dream really is to us.

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Maybe that dream is changing.

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Maybe it's not exactly what you thought it was when you began.

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I know that my dreams have definitely, like I said, when I was a little girl wanting to share my writing and art and poetry,

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like I've always had that core essence of it, but the way that that's looked and the resources that I've gathered throughout life or the communities or people that I've met,

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like I didn't know that it was going to unfold in those ways and I wasn't expecting it to.

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I just, I knew that there was a vision that I was following and it was, you know, it's up to me to see

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that through no matter how humbling or how much of the unknown we have to face.

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It's all part of it.

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It's all part of the journey.

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It's all part of the dream and let's accept that fact.

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Thank you so much for listening.

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Thank you for watching and making this arrangement with me.

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I'm so grateful that you're here, and I hope that you're having a beautiful morning, afternoon, evening.

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Don't forget that we are on this journey together.

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Love you guys.

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Bye.

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Thank you.

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FOR YOU

Кому подходит это видео?

Этот материал идеально подойдет для учеников среднего уровня, стремящихся улучшить разговорный английский и научиться выражать сложные эмоции. Если вы хотите практиковать "shadow speak" — технику повторения речи за носителем — или учить английский по видео, видео о "искусстве примирения с собой" поможет освоить естественный темп и интонацию разговорного языка. Оно подходит тем, кто хочет не только учить слова, но и понимать глубинные мысли и эмоции в речи.

Слова и идиомы, которые стоит запомнить

Romanticize — преувеличивать прелесть чего-то ("Он романтизирует жизнь в другой стране, не видя ее проблем").
Bow down to — подчиниться, слушаться ("Не стоит подчиниться эмоциям, они не всегда правдивы").
Transmute — преобразовать ("Принять свои чувства и преобразовать их в энергию для действий").
Intellectualize — размышлять о чувствах с умом, нежели переживать их ("Она любит intelectualize свои эмоции, вместо того чтобы просто почувствовать их").

Как правильно произносить: подводные камни акцента

Говорящая в видео использует естественный разговорный темп с множеством сокращений (например, "it's", "don't"). Для практики "shadowspeak" обратите внимание на интонацию: она падает на важные мысли (например, "life works that way") и поднимается на вопросах ("Are we willing to humble ourselves?"). Особое внимание уделите звуку th в словах like "the", "this" — попробуйте повторять его мягко, не заменяя на "z" или "t". Также практикуйте паузы: они помогают передать эмоциональную нагрузку, например, после фразы "it showed me, okay, this is how I really feel".

Используйте это видео для тренировки "shadow speak": повторяйте фразы сразу за говорящей, копируя ее интонацию и темп. Это поможет улучшить ваше произношение и чувство ритма разговорного английского, а также научит выражать сложные эмоции естественно.

Грамматика в этом видео

Конструкции, которые говорящий использует чаще всего, с точными словами из видео:

Конструкция	В видео
Present Perfect Continuous have/has been + -ing — действие началось раньше и продолжается	have been experiencing · what's been bringing · I've been trying
Present Perfect have/has + причастие прошедшего времени — прошлое действие, важное сейчас	has built · has broken · i've been hit
Пассивный залог be + причастие прошедшего времени — важно, что происходит, а не кто это делает	i've been hit · being sourced · being surrounded
Придаточные определительные who / which + предложение — уточнение о человеке или предмете	someone who likes · friend who God

Что такое техника Shadowing?

Shadowing — это научно обоснованная техника изучения языка, изначально разработанная для подготовки профессиональных переводчиков и популяризированная полиглотом доктором Александром Аргуэльесом. Метод прост, но эффективен: вы слушаете аудио на английском от носителей языка и немедленно повторяете вслух — как тень, следующая за говорящим с задержкой в 1–2 секунды. В отличие от пассивного прослушивания или грамматических упражнений, Shadowing заставляет мозг и мышцы рта одновременно обрабатывать и воспроизводить реальные речевые паттерны. Исследования показывают, что это значительно улучшает точность произношения, интонацию, ритм, связную речь, понимание на слух и беглость речи — что делает его одним из самых эффективных методов для подготовки к IELTS Speaking и реального общения на английском.

Техника шедоуинга: читать полное пошаговое руководство →

Практика Shadowing: the art of acceptance - Изучайте разговорный английский по видео

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Кому подходит это видео?

Слова и идиомы, которые стоит запомнить

Как правильно произносить: подводные камни акцента

Грамматика в этом видео

Что такое техника Shadowing?