ฝึกพูดภาษาอังกฤษด้วยเทคนิค Shadowing จากวิดีโอ: They/Them? How fat am I? | Gabriel Iglesias

But times are changing.

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But times are changing.

The rules are changing.

So I don't know how much longer this is gonna be okay.

I'll tell you what happened to me and why I brought that up.

I did a podcast.

And before I went into the studio,

I'm talking to the producer outside.

And the producer's really excited and happy.

And she's like, Gabriel Iglesias,

we're so excited to have you.

This is really cool.

Before you go in, the host wanted me to ask you something before you go in for your interview.

I go, sure, go for it.

Okay, what do you identify as?

I wasn't sure how to answer that.

I'm 47 years old.

I didn't know what to say.

I was like, shit, hungry, I guess.

I mean, I'm tired, sleepy, depressed on Tuesdays.

I don't know what you want me to say.

See, here's the thing.

I knew what she was trying to ask me.

I just wasn't trying to get involved in a conversation about something that has absolutely nothing to do with me.

This was, yeah.

I felt like I was being baited because no matter how I answered that question,

I was going to find myself in an awkward situation.

So, you know, because for me,

I was just like, let me just be funny.

But nowadays you can't just not answer the question.

Because silence is seen as a problem.

And I'm sorry if me not answering a certain question is considered a problem.

I was brought up during a time where you were constantly told to mind your business.

That's all I'm trying to do is stay in my lane.

Another thing we were constantly told was, always respect your elders.

And no matter what generation you were from,

that was at least the one thing we could always agree on until now.

Now older people are seen as a problem.

They are.

You know and I understand the youth of today has the technology in the palm of their hands

and you can google just about anything But you cannot google life experience Okay

You can't you can't download struggling you can't download failure You can't download these moments

that help build you up to make you a better person And so,

again, for me, I chose to stay in my lane and just crack jokes when the girl asked me the question.

She got very upset.

She got very offended.

Oh, as soon as I cracked the joke,

she's like, no, no, no,

that's not what I mean.

I mean, what are your pronouns?

What?

What are your pronouns?

For example, are you a they or a them?

A they?

Or a them?

How fat am I?

When did I stop being a it?

Apparently I ate myself into a plural, that's what happened.

What I'm finding is even if you have good intentions and you're just trying to be cool,

you can still find yourself in a situation.

So I'll tell you what else happened to me, okay?

I was at a McDonald's.

That's not even the joke, but okay.

Already they're like, this is gonna be good.

No!

I was at a McDonald's by my house.

The McDonald's by my house is actually a twofer.

It's a McDonald's on the corner,

and it's also a gas station.

I got a big SUV.

I knew it was gonna be a minute,

so I said, let me go get some nuggets while I'm here.

I walk into the McDonald's,

and as I'm walking in,

I couldn't help but notice this homeless family sitting right outside.

Now, they didn't have a sign,

they did not ask me for money,

but you could just tell.

You could just tell that this poor family is dealing with life.

So I get inside and I said, you know what?

I don't need anything to eat.

I really don't.

At this point, it's just a habit.

I get to the register and I says,

you know what, let me order some food for the family.

They got kids with them.

So I placed an order and the cashier's like, Anything else?

Actually, yes.

Do you have, um, um, wet naps?

Excuse me?

You know, wet naps to clean your hands.

Sir, you're more than welcome to use the restroom.

I'll give you the code.

Here's the thing.

It's not for me.

It's for the homeless family that's right outside the door.

I want to make sure that the little kids can clean their hands before they eat.

This food that I just ordered is for them.

And as we're talking...

Thank you.

100

As we're talking, the manager at the McDonald's is listening in to our conversation.

101

And she walks over, she's all nosy, right?

102

She's like, excuse me, I couldn't help but overhear the conversation.

103

Did you just say that this food is for the family outside?

104

Yeah, I hope that's okay.

105

Oh no, it is definitely okay.

106

Giving food to people who need food is definitely okay.

107

However, what you just called them is not okay.

108

What did I call them?

109

You said homeless.

110

Cause they are!

111

Look, shit!

112

He's licking the window!

113

Sir, you can't say that word anymore.

114

It's considered offensive.

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Who complained?

116

Okay, well, if I'm not supposed to say the word homeless anymore,

117

What am I supposed to say instead of the word homeless?

118

Sir, the new politically correct term is actually unhoused when describing someone in an unfortunate situation like that.

119

You're kidding.

120

No, sir, I'm not kidding and please lower your voice.

121

How do you want me to lower my voice when you're saying something so ridiculous?

122

Well, sir, if you think it's ridiculous,

123

then clearly you are part of the problem, not the solution.

124

Oh, Miami, I wanted to get ghetto.

125

I wanted to get ghetto.

126

Oh, yeah, oh, yeah, I wanted to go full Hialeah on them.

127

Thank you for coming, Hialeah.

128

So, yeah, I wanted to go off on her,

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but I wanted to get ghetto,

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but I couldn't because that is the regular McDonald's I go to.

131

You know what I'm saying?

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I'm not trying to get banned.

133

The next one's far and Cass is a bitch, so I'm like, nah.

134

So I looked at her and I said,

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okay, we're going to play this game.

136

Let's play this game.

137

From now on, I'm no longer fat.

138

According to you, I am now unexercised.

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I did bro, she looked at me,

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she's like, don't be ridiculous.

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And I looked at her and I was like,

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oh, oh, well if you think it's ridiculous,

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then clearly you are part of the problem, not the solution.

144

And I grabbed the food and I walked out.

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Now, second half of the story,

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I walk over to the family, okay?

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And I hand the bags of food to the mom.

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And the mom was so nice.

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She was just happy that someone thought of her and her kids.

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She got very emotional.

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She's like, I just want to say thank you.

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You have no idea what you're doing for us right now.

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This really means a lot.

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Thank you.

155

And I had to ask the question.

156

I said, are you okay?

157

I don't know what you thought.

158

Some of you are like, don't do it!

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Oh, I did it, that's why we're here, watch.

160

So I looked at her and I said, are you okay?

161

And she was like, no, unfortunately, we're not okay.

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We're not, we've been homeless now for four days.

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and I was like, um...

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I don't know if you heard.

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But, uh...

166

I didn't correct her.

167

I didn't correct her because I'm not a dick.

168

That's why I corrected her.

169

Thank you.

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