跟讀練習: you never lose, because it was never yours - 通過影片學習英語口語

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For a very long time, I could not cope with the word loss.

I hated to lose something.

I hated to be a loser, whether that be literally something as small as I lost my favorite lip product or I lost a good friend.

So as I've gotten older, I've had to come to the realization that loss or being a loser is sometimes a part of life.

But then one day, I was like, wait a minute, I can't even control my breath I can't control my body

in regards of its health something could go wrong tomorrow

and all I can do is try my best to prevent

that from happening but ultimately I cannot control it so

if I don't own my own breath can I ever lose something

that was never mine to begin with because

if you think about it in order to lose something means it was in your possession

that you had full control over said object noun whatever it may be person place your thing

and that's not the case because if it was truly mine

and i was the owner i could never lose it meaning i never lose

because it was never mine and i love that because

that makes me never a loser but i will go ahead

and explain why the philosophy psychology and even my own religion islam

and a lot of theological religions point to this exact fact where you are not a loser

or more eloquently you can't lose because it was never yours

if you're new to my channel my name is sahar

or sahar and i am a professional yapper self -proclaimed philosopher

and i really just i am the thought daughter nothing is

ever not not deep everything is deep even the mere concept

of losing things anyway i digress let's get into this video starting off with the philosophy

and like most things every time i have a thought

and i look to philosophy i discover that it's been experienced

and evaluated way before my time and within

that i realize i will never be the creator of something new

but i will always have evidence to my creation it's all

about reframe anyway epictetus in his book in credian has a line

that was very radical at the time

that he dropped it essentially he says never say of anything i have lost it

but i have restored it has your child died it is

restored has your wife died she is restored has your estate been taken away is not this also restored and

if you notice this phrasing he doesn't say don't care he

says restore to epictetus the universe is a landlord like everything

you enjoy your partner your wealth your job even your health

is a temporary property handed to you basically as a loan

even buddhism actually has this exact same concept um called upadana

which is clinging or grasping um suffering doesn't happen

because things change suffering happens because things are constantly moving

and we are standing there screaming at the river to freeze

into solid ground impermanence isn't the interruption of life it is life

so if this idea is a thousand years old why does it hurt

so badly still i think humans evolve

but we never evolve in this aspect of things you know i mean

if something was discovered thousands of years ago we are able to build upon

that within science but for some reason within philosophy

it's never built upon within our own self -understanding

because we still go through the same struggles

and it's about going back to

that to understand them there's this thing called person illusion

and essentially within person illusion you fall in love

or you build a deep friendship so you think you have them

but people are not real estate they are not autonomous agents within your life

and there are trajectories that happen to intersect with yours

and for their life

and that's the reason why you guys are even in each other's worlds loving someone deeply

while recognizing you have no place in their future life is actually the purest form of affection

because regardless of if they exist within your world or

if they choose you back you still love them

and isn't the purest version of love what we all aim to be able to extend to another person

so why is it that whenever it's not that easily attainable

and love isn't easy we start to think that

that means we lost the person there's also this thing called opportunity illusion

so think about you spending six months pitching a project you

build the decks you rehearse the lines even imagine this great launch

and within this entire process you didn't just want the outcome

you colonize the entire concept of what it's going to feel

like what it's going to be like the person you are going to be in

that moment and the thing is whenever that opportunity or outcome goes to someone else, you actually just feel robbed now.

But you weren't robbed of a future, you're robbed of an assumption.

Meaning you did not lose a future opportunity, you lost an assumption that you made in your mind of what it would be like, what it's going to happen, how you're going to feel,

assuming the outcome is going to be in your favor.

Now I'm going to stop being preachy and tap into a little bit of reality, what the pessimist wants to hear,

or even self -proclaimed realist one really ear -leading pessimist um sometimes this can become a toxic habit

so within philosophy there's this thing called spiritual bypassing

and you can consider this the dark side of philosophy um it's a term coined by psychologist john wellwood

and it's when you use philosophical ideas to duck under the hard work of actual human emotion

so if you yell it was never mind the second something doesn't work your way

or breaks your heart you aren't being epictetus in that moment you are actually being just terrified.

It's essentially a self -protection mechanism where if nothing is yours then nothing can hurt you so you aren't trying anymore.

You don't pitch the ambitious project, you don't open up to your partner, you essentially keep one foot in and one foot out of everything

that could potentially have the power to hurt you just

so in the end you can sit back

and say you see it was never mine and that's not the right way to go about it okay.

That's ultimately not wisdom, that's emotional cowardice.

You see grief is the tax we pay for being brave enough to attach to things in a temporal universe.

If you don't feel the sting of the loss you never really honor the value of what you had.

Now for the psychology aspect of things there's a concept called psychological ownership theory.

Research has found that your brain doesn't differentiate very well between your physical arm and your intangible assets meaning your job title, your relationship status, subscriber count,

five -year plan, etc. So when you control something or you know it intimately or invest any effort into it,

your brain fuses it into your natural self -map and it becomes mine.

Meaning that when a person leaves or a contract falls through, your brain doesn't register it as an event.

It's literally seen as literal dismemberment, losing a body part.

So you aren't just missing an opportunity, you are now missing a part of your identity, a part of what makes you you

and again the phrase it was never mine isn't supposed to

make you care less it's designed to fix your accounting it's a tool to remind your brain

that you are mistaking a lease for a deed of ownership so

100

if the person wasn't yours the job wasn't yours the home

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wasn't yours what is even ours well what do i own in this world that's the real question

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because i'm tired of losing i don't want to lose what do i own

103

and the answer to

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that is what's left is what's built inside of you the capacity to love

105

that you expanded while you were with them that is yours the discipline

106

and skill you developed while grinding for that failed venture

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that is yours the integrity in which you handle that collapse

108

that is yours you can never lose that

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so you don't lose you release what was borrowed

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and you retain what was forged the external world can repossess the house it cannot repossess the character

111

that you built throughout the journey Even within Islam, I think the reason why this concept even really started going in my mind is

112

because we are very aware we don't even control our next breath.

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I'm not in control of anything that I do in my life.

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It's quite literally qadr.

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It's up to Allah's will.

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So then what can I control?

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And I think

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that is the ultimate question people ask whenever they try to

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figure out what the point of us being on earth is

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because if everything's written

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and we are already destined for certain things why am I

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here what is the point of me going through things

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if I have very little control

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and that's kind of what got me spiraling into like figuring out okay

125

so what what is the purpose what is the point what am I supposed to do here and that's

126

when I realized oh there are things in my control there

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are things of how I can perceive loss there's ways

128

that I can show up whenever I'm sad

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when I don't get the way I want there's ways I

130

can build discipline in order to make do ah to get the ways

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that I want there's actually a lot in our control but

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when we focus too much on the things

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that are out of our control is where we feel lost

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but remember you can never lose because it was never yours

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but you can always win

136

if you focus on what is i need to find a way to make

137

that line cute on the other end

138

if you'd like to read more about this i wrote about my sub stack

139

but this is really just a short video to explain my life motto obviously borrowed from epictetus

140

but i didn't know it when i created it

141

so maybe he maybe he knew I was gonna exist and wanted to borrow from me all right bye

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本課的詞彙與口語要點

這段影片共有 141 個句子、1782 個單詞可供跟讀。講話部分時長為 9:08。說話人語速較快，每分鐘約 195 個詞，會出現較多連讀和弱讀。 84% 的單詞屬於英語最常用的 3,000 詞，其餘的詞建議在練習前先學一下。

影片中的重點詞彙

影片中 15 個值得學習的單詞，附發音和釋義：

單詞	發音	釋義
restore 動詞	/ɹɪˈstoɹ/	恢復 /恢復
essentially 副詞	/ɪˈsɛnʃəli/	本質上 /本質上, 基本上
loser 名詞	/luzɚ/	輸家 /輸家
rob 動詞	/ɹɑb/	搶, 搶劫 /搶劫
breathe 動詞	/bɹiːð/	呼吸, 吸
borrow 動詞	/ˈbɑɹ.oʊ/	借, 貸 /貸
illusion 名詞	/ɪˈl(j)uːʒ(ə)n/	幻想, 幻覺 /幻覺
suffer 動詞	/ˈsʌfɚ/	受苦, 遭受
aspect 名詞	/ˈæspɛkt/	方面
ownership 名詞	/ˈoʊnɚʃɪp/	所有權 /所有權
psychology 名詞	/saɪˈkɑ.lə.d͡ʒi/	心理學 /心理學
phrase 名詞	/ˈfɹeɪ̯z/	短語 /短語, 片語 /片語
discipline 名詞	/ˈdɪsəplɪn/	紀律 /紀律
assumption 名詞	/əˈsʌm(p).ʃ(ə)n/	假設 /假設
temporary 形容詞	/ˈtɛmp(əˌɹ)ɛɹi/	暫時 /暫時

影片中出現的短語動詞

單詞	發音	釋義
figure out 動詞		弄清楚
go through 動詞		通過 /通過
go ahead 動詞	/ˌɡoʊ əˈhɛd/	請便 /請便
show up 動詞		露面

影片中的語法

說話人最常用的結構，並附上影片中的原話：

結構	影片中的用法
被動語態 be + 過去分詞 — 強調發生了什麼，而不是誰做的	is restored · was discovered · weren't robbed
現在完成時 have/has + 過去分詞 — 過去發生但與現在仍有關聯的事	I've gotten · it's been · have lost

需要注意的發音

說話人用了 41 次縮略和弱讀形式，例如 don't, doesn't, I'm。請按聽到的簡短形式來說。

“th” 音: breathe /bɹiːð/, theological /θi.əˈlɑd͡ʒɪkl/
“sh” 和 “zh” 音: essentially /ɪˈsɛnʃəli/, illusion /ɪˈl(j)uːʒ(ə)n/, ownership /ˈoʊnɚʃɪp/, assumption /əˈsʌm(p).ʃ(ə)n/, friendship /ˈfɹɛn(d)ʃɪp/
長單詞——注意重音位置: essentially /ɪˈsɛnʃəli/, psychology /saɪˈkɑ.lə.d͡ʒi/, temporary /ˈtɛmp(əˌɹ)ɛɹi/, potentially /pəˈtɛnʃ(ə)li/, mechanism /ˈmɛk.ə.nɪ.zəm/

如何用這段影片練習

先完整聽一遍影片，不要開口，記下不認識的單詞。
先用 0.75 倍速逐句跟讀，熟練之後再回到正常速度。
錄下自己的聲音並與原聲對比，特別注意 restore, essentially, loser 這類單詞。

什麼是跟讀法？

跟讀法 (Shadowing) 是一種有科學依據的語言學習技巧，最初開發用於專業口譯員的培訓，並由多語言者Alexander Arguelles博士普及。這個方法簡單而強大：您在聽英語母語原聲的同時立即大聲重複——就像是一個延遲1-2秒緊跟說話者的影子。與被動聽力或語法練習不同，跟讀法強迫您的大腦和口腔肌肉同時處理並模模擬實的講話模式。研究表明它能顯著提高發音準確性，語調，節奏，連讀，聽力理解和口語流利度——使其成為雅思口語備考和真實英語交流最有效的方法之一。

影子跟讀法: 閱讀完整分步指南 →

跟讀練習: you never lose, because it was never yours - 通過影片學習英語口語

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