Pratica di Shadowing: the reason you always feel behind - Impara a parlare inglese con i video
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When I was a kid, my dream was to open up my own ice cream shop.
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I have always loved ice cream, and my parents even made me business cards for my business that didn't even exist yet.
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I was probably seven or eight years old, and I really thought this was my calling.
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A part of me still wishes that maybe I'll have my own ice cream store or bakery one day, but if I'm being honest, that will probably never happen.
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And that's just one of the many what-ifs and dreams that will never manifest in my life.
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But for some of my more realistic goals, like buying a house, getting married, having financial freedom, traveling the world, I worry I might never get some of those things either.
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And I'm sure you feel the same way.
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As kids, we were all told to dream big.
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But the problem is that even though these goals seemed hopeful in the moment we made them, they created these massive expectations in our mind.
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Now as adults, there is this massive pressure to live up to these expectations.
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And when things don't go according to plan, our world crumbles and we become depressed.
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The truth is you will probably never get everything you want in this life and that is okay.
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If you don't believe me, I'll prove it to you.
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I grew up being the quintessential perfect kid.
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I got straight A's in every class.
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I did every extracurricular you can possibly think of.
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Got into a super prestigious competitive college.
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The whole resume.
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I got everything me and my parents ever wished for.
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My whole childhood was basically me winning at everything.
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But because I was expected to win, I started wanting to win at everything all the time.
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Even at stuff I was genuinely bad at, like sports.
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Don't even get me started on that stupid pacer test.
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I am not even that athletic, but if I didn't place first among the girls, I would be so embarrassed.
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This competitiveness followed me everywhere, and it really showed up when it was time to figure out my career.
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I knew my real passion was YouTube, but time and time again, I found myself questioning if I was even doing the right thing.
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At some point, I even started applying to corporate jobs on LinkedIn for the same jobs that all my successful friends had.
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There were just so many times I wanted to push my dreams aside to go compete for something
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that everyone else was fighting for.
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And I think that's what happens to all of us.
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Between growing up and becoming an adult, our true unadulterated desires get traded for what we think we're supposed to want.
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Like an impressive salary, a high rise apartment, the nice car, a huge group of friends.
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But the greatest problem is that because all of our desires are borrowed, even when we do get these things, we're still not happy.
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And if we don't get them, also not happy.
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It's a lose-lose.
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This is why people in their 40s
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and 50s start to go a little stir-crazy and go into what we call that midlife crisis.
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Because they suddenly realize
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that they spent their entire lives working in a job they hate just to be able to buy things
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that don't actually make them happy.
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Like just imagine working towards something your entire life just to realize at the end that it wasn't even worth it.
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And social media adds more fire to all of this.
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Every time you scroll, you're consuming someone else's success, every trend that's on the market.
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And over time, we start adopting more desires that don't even align with us.
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This is why so many people our age have shopping addictions.
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They buy, buy, buy trying to fill this hole of not feeling good enough.
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And as soon as they buy their dream thing, the satisfaction of it wears off and they go find something else that's going to make them happy.
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But guys, no amount of stuff is ever going to satisfy your desires because it will never be enough.
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And the word for this feeling is lack.
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And guys, trust me as a girl who literally has her entire career on social media, social media is designed to make you feel lack.
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To convince you that there's something else missing from your life, even if you're already happy.
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It's like when fast food commercials show you a juicy burger and suddenly you start craving it, even if you're not hungry.
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The reason I know this is because I am the girl that did get everything I wanted.
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The apartment, the dream career, the group of friends.
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I worked so long and so hard to be able to get these things that I wanted for so long, but at the end of the day, I can't say I'm 100% happy nor satisfied.
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Every single day, I find more things that I want or things that are missing from my life.
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And the thing I want you to understand is that lack does not exist without your power.
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But the more you stare at it, the louder that feeling gets.
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And over time, you live your life believing that you'll never be pretty enough, rich enough, smart enough.
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This feeling of not being enough is so hard to remove on your own because when you internalize these thoughts, they become part of your identity.
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You literally see them as fact.
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You don't even question the things you want, why you want them.
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And that's why you're still unhappy, even when you do get those things.
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I worked my butt off for three years to be able to move out and get my dream apartment.
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And although it's been great, my life isn't perfect.
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Actually, it's been a lot harder and scarier since moving out
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but i talk about everything with my therapist
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and guys she's actually a lifesaver it took me a really
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long time to even start therapy in the first place
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and i didn't even know where to look for one
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so that's why i really like better help who's the kind
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sponsor for today everything is all done online you just fill out a short questionnaire
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and they match you with a licensed therapist you can meet
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with them at home you don't even have to drive to an office
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and it works around your schedule and
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if the therapist you're matched with isn't the right fit you
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can switch any time for free until you find the right
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one i highly encourage everyone tries therapy especially right after you
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graduate school before you jump into a job my therapist really helped me see who i am
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and the things i want without outside influence you can visit betterhelp.com allison back to get started
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and receive 10 off your first month of therapy
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so now the question becomes so should i just give up and and not want anything anymore?
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No, wanting stuff isn't bad.
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It's human nature to crave, to act on our desires.
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What you have to understand is that there are two completely different ways to want things.
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The first comes from a feeling of lack.
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You want the diet pills because you don't feel skinny enough.
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You want the promotion so that your family will finally accept you.
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You wanna travel because all your friends are going this year and you can't.
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But you're chasing something that's never going to fix that feeling.
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Even if you do get the promotion, is it guaranteed that your family will respect you?
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Even if you do get the money to travel, your friends are still going to go somewhere new every year.
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You are always going to play this game of catch up.
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And we can never control how other people act or how they perceive us.
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That's why buying all this stuff or doing crazy things to your body will never be enough.
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You'll be chasing your own tail because you're convinced it's the solution and it's not.
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It is never about the physical things that you lack.
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It's about you ignoring what you actually need, which is to feel accepted by yourself.
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So the antidote for lack is a kind of wanting that stems from fullness.
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It's having gratitude for what you already have while still striving for more.
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It means going after something you genuinely care about, but being okay without it.
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It's about creating goals that align with you, even if no one else has the same goals.
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Instead of trying to compete in other people's race, you are in your own race.
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You are only competing with yourself.
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Of course, we all want more money, right?
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We want a better house, better clothes, but your reasons for wanting those things have to come from abundance first.
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Before we start wanting anything else, we have to acknowledge what we already have.
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It's so easy for me to look at the girl on Instagram
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and wish I had her life or her body or her connections.
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When in reality, the version of me five years ago would have done anything to have the life I have right now.
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I walk around my apartment and forget that this was my dream literally a year ago.
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I get so stressed about creating content and forget that this was all I ever wanted to do.
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Remember to notice all the things you worked for in your life and appreciate them.
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You are living someone else's dream right now.
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So many people would do anything to be in your position.
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And the crazy thing is when you start thinking this way, you realize that you cannot feel gratitude and lack in the same moment.
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Try it.
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They can't both be in the room at once.
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Your life is not a to-do list.
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All these milestones like get a good job, get married, buy a house, have kids, we're all drilled into your mind from a young age.
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Yes, it's great to want these things, but question why you want them.
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And just remember that your version of a marriage, a house, and a family will look different from everyone else's and it's supposed to.
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The reality is that we're all gonna die with things still unchecked on our list.
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But I think that's the point in life.
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It's not about getting everything you want, It's learning to live with what you have and building a life that you're happy with.
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You are allowed to want things and be at peace at the same time.
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Maybe in a few years, I'll actually want to open up my ice cream shop, or maybe I won't.
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And if I don't, it'll be a sweet little memory, not a loss.
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I wasn't handing out fake business cards at seven years old to make a massive profit.
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I just liked serving people and making them happy.
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And I do that now in so many more ways than I could have ever imagined.
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So sometimes the things you want aren't actually what you want.
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And it's not sad.
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It's actually quite freeing.
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If any of this resonated with you, then let me know in the comments what your ice cream shop was or what this made you think of.
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And if you like these big sis advice chats, I'll link my whole playlist right here.
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I love you guys and remember that you will always be enough.
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I'll see you in the next one.
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Bye.
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Vocabolario e note di pronuncia per questa lezione
Questa lezione di conversazione di livello B2 si basa sul video “the reason you always feel behind”. Questo video contiene 139 frasi e 1940 parole da ripetere con lo shadowing. Il parlato dura 8:42. Chi parla va veloce, circa 223 parole al minuto: aspettati suoni legati e ridotti. Il 89% delle parole rientra nelle 3.000 più comuni dell’inglese, quindi il lessico è facile da seguire.
Vocaboli chiave di questo video
Le 15 parole più avanzate del video, con pronuncia e significato:
| Parola | Pronuncia | Significato |
|---|---|---|
| therapist sostantivo | /ˈθɛɹəpɪst/ | terapeuta, terapista |
| align verbo | /əˈlaɪn/ | allineare |
| gratitude sostantivo | /ˈɡɹæ.tɪ.tud/ | gratitudine, riconoscenza |
| satisfy verbo | /ˈsætɪsfaɪ/ | soddisfare, accontentare |
| expectation sostantivo | /ˌɛk.spɛkˈteɪ.ʃən/ | attesa |
| genuinely avverbio | /ˈd͡ʒɛn.ju.ɪn.li/ | veramente, genuinamente |
| antidote sostantivo | /ˈæn.tɪ.doʊt/ | antidoto |
| competitiveness sostantivo | /kəmˈpɛtɪtɪvnəs/ | competitività |
| crumble verbo | /ˈkɹʌmbəl/ | sgretolarsi, crollare |
| extracurricular aggettivo | /ˌɛkstɹəkəˈɹɪkjʊlə(ɹ)/ | extracurricolare |
| fullness sostantivo | /ˈfʊlnəs/ | pienezza |
| questionnaire sostantivo | /ˌk(w)ɛstʃəˈnɛə/ | questionario |
| resonate verbo | /ˈɹɛz.əˌneɪt/ | risuonare |
| craving sostantivo | /ˈkɹeɪ.vɪŋ/ | brama |
| playlist sostantivo | /ˈpleɪˌlɪst/ | playlist |
I phrasal verb che sentirai
| Parola | Pronuncia | Significato |
|---|---|---|
| grow up verbo | crescere | |
| open up verbo | aprire | |
| figure out verbo | scoprire, rendersi conto | |
| fill out verbo | /fɪl ˈaʊt/ | compilare |
| give up verbo | arrendersi | |
| hand out verbo | distribuire |
La grammatica di questo video
Le strutture che chi parla usa di più, con le parole esatte del video:
| Struttura | Nel video |
|---|---|
| Frasi condizionali if + frase, will/would + verbo — una condizione e il suo risultato | if I'm being honest, that will probably · If you don't believe me, I'll prove · if I don't, it'll be |
| Forma passiva be + participio passato — conta ciò che accade, non chi lo fa | was expected · are borrowed · is designed |
Pronuncia a cui fare attenzione
Chi parla usa 48 contrazioni e forme ridotte, come don't, you're, I'll. Pronunciale nella forma breve, così come le senti.
- I suoni “th”: therapist /ˈθɛɹəpɪst/, cloth /klɒθ/, athletic /æθˈlɛt.ɪk/
- I suoni “sh” e “zh”: expectation /ˌɛk.spɛkˈteɪ.ʃən/, quintessential /ˌkwɪntɪˈsɛnʃəl/, addiction /əˈdɪkˌʃən/, satisfaction /sætɪsˈfækʃən/
- Parole lunghe — attenzione all’accento: expectation /ˌɛk.spɛkˈteɪ.ʃən/, genuinely /ˈd͡ʒɛn.ju.ɪn.li/, competitiveness /kəmˈpɛtɪtɪvnəs/, extracurricular /ˌɛkstɹəkəˈɹɪkjʊlə(ɹ)/, internalize /ɪnˈtɝnəlaɪz/
I suoni difficili per chi parla italiano:
- /h/ — va soffiata, non è muta: hopeful /ˈhoʊpfl̩/, unhappy /ʌnˈhæpi/
- Consonante finale — senza aggiungere una vocale dopo: therapist /ˈθɛɹəpɪst/, gratitude /ˈɡɹæ.tɪ.tud/, antidote /ˈæn.tɪ.doʊt/, competitiveness /kəmˈpɛtɪtɪvnəs/, fullness /ˈfʊlnəs/
- /æ/ — più aperta della “e”: gratitude /ˈɡɹæ.tɪ.tud/, satisfy /ˈsætɪsfaɪ/, antidote /ˈæn.tɪ.doʊt/, manifest /ˈmæn.ɪ.fɛst/, embarrassed /ɪmˈbæɹ.əst/
Come esercitarsi con questo video
- Ascolta tutto il video una volta senza parlare e annota le parole che non conosci.
- Inizia a velocità 0,75×, fai shadowing frase per frase e torna alla velocità normale quando diventa facile.
- Registrati e confronta con l’originale, facendo attenzione a parole come therapist, align, gratitude.
Cos'è la tecnica dello Shadowing?
Shadowing è una tecnica di apprendimento delle lingue supportata da studi scientifici, originariamente sviluppata per la formazione dei traduttori professionisti e resa popolare dal poliglotta Dr. Alexander Arguelles. Il metodo è semplice ma potente: ascolti un audio in inglese di madrelingua e lo ripeti immediatamente ad alta voce — come un'ombra che segue il parlante con un ritardo di solo 1–2 secondi. A differenza dell'ascolto passivo o degli esercizi di grammatica, lo shadowing costringe il tuo cervello e i muscoli della bocca a elaborare e riprodurre simultaneamente i modelli di discorso reale. La ricerca dimostra che migliora significativamente la precisione della pronuncia, l'intonazione, il ritmo, il discorso connesso, la comprensione dell'ascolto e la fluidità del parlato — rendendolo uno dei metodi più efficaci per la preparazione alla prova di speaking dell'IELTS e per la comunicazione reale in inglese.