쉐도잉 연습: To Anyone Feeling Lonely - 영상으로 영어 말하기 배우기
레슨 만드는 중...
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Loneliness is complicated.
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New town, new job, depression, social anxiety, low self-esteem, no friends.
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Sometimes it's none of those things and sometimes it's all of them.
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Sometimes it's brief, sometimes it's more long-lasting, sometimes it makes sense why and sometimes it doesn't make any sense at all.
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There might be a simple solution for some while for others there's not.
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So you can see why it's complicated.
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Just like with most things, there is no single common cause or cure.
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Nor is there a clear definition because how could we possibly define any element of something that is so abstract?
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If we look at the term loneliness online, the first thing that pops up is sadness because one has no friends or company.
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And I wouldn't say that's entirely true.
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It wasn't in my case, at least.
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For me, it was actually around the time when I was surrounded by people almost constantly.
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Waking up, breakfast, lunch, going out, going to bed.
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Very rarely was I not accompanied by others.
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Although I did, of course, try to find my alone moments, because introvert survival instinct.
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Yet I felt really lonely.
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And it's not an easy thing to describe, I can barely even describe it to myself,
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but it was kind of like feeling trapped inside my own thoughts and feelings.
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And that bubble almost became my comfort zone.
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Like you almost accept that this state of mind is your home now.
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And at that time, I couldn't really understand why I was feeling that way.
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You know how you sometimes can't seem to think clearly when you're in a certain situation, but then once you're out of that situation and you look back,
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it all becomes crystal clear.
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It's like ending a relationship and then looking back like, what the hell was I thinking?
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all of a sudden, it all just makes sense.
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You feel like the answers were right in front of you all along, but you just couldn't see them because you were blinded by love or whatever.
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And I think loneliness can kind of blind you the same way.
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It makes us see life through a lens that might not always reflect reality.
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So now that I have been out of that situation for a long time,
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I see how that played out in my life back then and I can see the things that had blinded me.
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Now, I'm not going to bore you with the details,
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but essentially, I realized that I wasn't fully living a life that aligned with my authentic self.
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And now, that might sound cliche and cheesy, but bear with me.
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So let's say you're at university studying to become an engineer
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you're going to be surrounding yourself with other people who are doing the same thing.
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But if that's not really what you want to be doing,
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chances are you are going to feel a disconnect with your surroundings and perhaps even with yourself.
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And that doesn't mean that there's anything wrong with those people or with you.
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It's just that just because something is someone else's world, it doesn't mean it has to be yours.
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And sometimes you realize those things after you've already invested yourself in them.
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And sometimes we talk ourselves into thinking that we should be wanting this thing because,
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I don't know, others want it or because it would be wrong not to want it.
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Like, we should be grateful.
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And other times, the thing that we're doing used to be exactly what we wanted, but we're human beings.
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We grow, we learn, we change, and that's just life.
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No matter how much you try to calculate the risks
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and foresee the future to somehow try to make sure that you're making the right decisions in life,
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you're not a weather app.
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Even those things get it wrong.
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Like it's been saying it's going to be sunny for a week, but where is the sun?
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Stockholm.
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Now the period of loneliness eventually passed for me.
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And this is footage of me from some time later
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when my life wasn't nearly as eventful and when I had way less people around me.
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More like three, including family.
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Now before I share my thoughts on what I think happened between then and now,
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and what I learned, I do want to make it clear that I don't have all of this figured out.
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I am no therapist or psychologist.
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I'm not qualified to give any professional advice other than the time I spend researching for these videos.
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I'm just someone sharing their story in the hopes of someone finding something valuable
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in it and even if you don't maybe you like the music
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or the visuals or something anyway here's what i learned
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So this low point of mine was before I guess I started walking this trail of self-exploration that I'm currently on.
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And perhaps some people don't really care about getting to know themselves and they will do fine.
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You know, everyone is different.
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But for me, I found a lot of answers
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when I became more curious to try to understand why I am the way I am
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and what my true values are and what brings me joy and what doesn't.
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And this isn't just something that you learn through books and reading.
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Although that's great, I think the best way to get to know yourself is through experience,
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the ups and downs in life by stepping out of your comfort zone and challenging yourself,
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even if it's just a workout challenge or challenging yourself to do something you've never done before.
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Being able to answer questions like, what scares me?
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What makes me really uncomfortable?
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Where do I find my peace?
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How do I deal with my anger?
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Now how is this related to loneliness?
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So I think that if you don't explore more of who you are, you'll just kind of get dragged along in life
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and you will end up in places that you don't want to be with people whose company you don't really enjoy,
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which will then lead you to feel like you don't belong, which might end up with you feeling lonely.
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Or perhaps you will end up nowhere and with no one.
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Again because you don't know where you would want to be or what kind of people you would be interested in meeting.
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So instead of letting life lead you, you should be the leader of your life.
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Another part of this is that understanding yourself better will help you understand other people better in general as well.
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And there's been studies on this, I can link some in the description if you're interested.
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But what I've found is that in understanding other people better, not only makes it easier to navigate through all the shallowness,
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but it also welcomes the opportunity for deeper human connection,
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which ultimately is one of the most meaningful things that we can have in life.
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I read somewhere that the opposite of loneliness is meaningful connection.
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And I buy that, not only with others, but with yourself as well.
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And ultimately, I've realized the importance of doing what I want to be doing, rather than doing what is expected of me.
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And now I'm not talking about taking responsibility and doing the boring stuff that are our obligations,
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but I'm talking about aligns more with the engineering example that I touched on earlier.
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We don't even always realize it, but a lot of the decisions
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that we make are based on some sort of norm
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that we're trying to follow or some sort of expectation that we're trying to live up to,
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whether that's on a societal level or if it's just in your family, rather than doing what we feel in our hearts.
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In other words, we're letting other people's expectations influence or even determine our decisions.
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And those other people can be people we don't even know,
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people who follow us online that we somehow feel like we need to prove something to.
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And we do this all the time.
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The degree we choose, how we choose to spend our money, how we choose to spend our weekend or our birthday.
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You know, we try to please others at the expense of our own pleasure.
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And it's like people who throw big birthday parties
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or weddings with a bunch of people who they don't even really care about and who don't even really care about them.
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And they don't even really enjoy themselves because they're not doing what they actually want to be doing, but rather doing it to prove something,
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either to themselves or to others.
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And that's not what I would call fulfillment.
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In reality is that no one really cares that much about what you do.
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It's like when you go to the gym and you think that everyone is staring at you,
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when in reality, most people are just focused on themselves.
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I promise.
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Now, none of the things that I brought up are things that you accomplish in a week or ever, really.
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There is no accomplishment here.
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It's a lifelong journey, and this is just my experience.
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You know, I like to see life as an adventure where I'm just picking up lessons along the way,
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but I'm very aware that I'm only beginning to scratch the surface and that's exciting.
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Now since loneliness is so unique to each person, I would love to hear your experience and I'm sure that others would as well.
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So feel free to share your story, let's chat in the comments and I will see you there.
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Thank you.
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현실적인 상황: 외로움의 복잡함
이 영상은 외로움에 대한 개인적인 경험을 공유하며, 그 복잡성을 설명합니다. 새로운 도시, 새 직장, 우울증, 사회불안, 낮은 자존감, 친구 부족 등 다양한 원인이 있을 수 있지만, 가끔은 이 모든 것이 아니거나, 반대로 모두 겹칠 수도 있습니다. 심지어 주변에 항상 사람이 있어도 외로움을 느끼는 경우도 있는데, 이는 자신의 진정한 모습과 어긋나는 삶을 살고 있을 때 자주 발생합니다. 예를 들어, 공학을 공부하지만 실제로는 다른 것을 원한다면 주변과의 단절감을 느낄 수 있습니다. 이처럼 외로움은 현실을 왜곡하는 렌즈처럼 작용해 우리가 분명한 답을 보지 못하게 합니다.
유용한 표현과 연어
- align with: ~와 일치하다. "living a life that aligned with my authentic self" (자신의 진정한 모습과 일치하는 삶을 살다)
- blind (someone) to: ~를 보지 못하게 하다. "loneliness can kind of blind you" (외로움은 당신을 어리게 할 수 있다)
- invest (oneself) in: ~에 투자하다. "after you've already invested yourself in them" (이미 그것에 자신을 투자한 후)
- talk oneself into: 스스로를 설득하다. "we talk ourselves into thinking that we should be wanting this thing" (우리는 이것을 원해야 한다고 스스로를 설득한다)
당신의 쉐도잉 챌린지
이 영상의 대화를 이용해 영어 쉐도잉 연습을 해보세요. 다음 단계를 따라하세요: 1) 영상을 1분 정도 재생한 후 멈추고, 같은 속도로 따라 읽습니다. 2) 발음과 억양에 주의를 기울이며, 특히 "align with", "blind to"와 같은 표현의 리듬을 따라합니다. 3) 3번 반복한 후, 스스로 녹음하여 원본과 비교해 보세요. 이 연습은 영어 발음 교정뿐만 아니라 영어 회화 연습에도 도움이 됩니다. 또한, IELTS 스피킹 준비를 하는 분들에게도 자연스러운 표현을 익히는 데 유용합니다. 유튜브 영어 공부를 통해 매일 10분씩 연습하면 빠르게 실력이 향상될 것입니다!
이 영상의 문법
화자가 가장 많이 쓰는 문형을 영상 속 실제 표현과 함께 정리했습니다.
| 문형 | 영상 속 표현 |
|---|---|
| 수동태 be + 과거분사 — 누가 하는지보다 무슨 일이 일어나는지에 초점 | is complicated · was surrounded · were blinded |
| 현재완료 have/has + 과거분사 — 과거의 일이 지금도 관련이 있을 때 | have been · you've already invested · you've never done |
| 관계절 who / which + 절 — 사람이나 사물에 대한 추가 정보 | people who are · people who follow · people who throw |
쉐도잉이란? 영어 실력을 빠르게 키우는 과학적 방법
쉐도잉(Shadowing)은 원래 전문 통역사 훈련을 위해 개발된 언어 학습 기법으로, 다언어 학자인 Dr. Alexander Arguelles에 의해 대중화된 방법입니다. 핵심 원리는 간단하지만 매우 강력합니다: 원어민의 영어를 들으면서 1~2초의 짧은 지연으로 즉시 소리 내어 따라 말하는 것——마치 '그림자(shadow)'처럼 화자를 따라가는 것입니다. 문법 공부나 수동적인 청취와 달리, 쉐도잉은 뇌와 입 근육이 동시에 실시간으로 영어를 처리하고 재현하도록 훈련합니다. 연구에 따르면 이 방법은 발음 정확도, 억양, 리듬, 연음, 청취력, 말하기 유창성을 크게 향상시킵니다. IELTS 스피킹 준비와 자연스러운 영어 소통을 원하는 분들에게 특히 효과적입니다.