Shadowing Practice: Push Yourself to Be Happy Even When Life is Hard - Learn English Speaking with Video
Creating lesson...
1
Do you ever notice how when life punches you in the gut, your mind starts attacking you too?
2
And suddenly you're not just stressed, but you're spiraling and now you're finding flaws in everything in your life.
3
Your job, and your body, and your future, and your own worth.
4
Here's the truth that most people never actually learn: happiness is not what happens after the pain is gone.
5
It's what you practice during it.
6
When you only focus on what's going wrong, your brain becomes a magnet for misery.
7
You find more things to be miserable about.
8
And that's a really, really slippery slope.
9
So what if you could actually rewire your brain to find the good in everything, even if your entire life is on fire?
10
And if you can train yourself to search for even a sliver of good,
11
your entire mindset and even your brain chemistry and your brain wiring will start to shift.
12
And so let's dive into it.
13
Let's just call it like it is, right?
14
Most people, very good people in this world, completely cave when things go sideways in their lives.
15
If bills start to stack up, they shut down.
16
If their relationship If they get bad news, they start finding everything that's wrong in their life.
17
Every single little teeny tiny thing.
18
It's kind of like as soon as like one thing just goes wrong, the brain is like, see, I told you your entire life was trash.
19
It's like just this, you know, it's like this little teeny tiny house of cards
20
and you just give it one little flick and the entire thing falls apart.
21
Does that sound familiar?
22
Well, you have to understand that if you don't actually start to work on your mindset around
23
It's only going to get worse and worse, and you're going to start to develop patterns to find the bad in everything.
24
Like, you probably know somebody, I have somebody in the top of my head right now that I can think of that is negative all the time.
25
You could win the lottery, And they'd be like, "Oh my God, do you know how much you're going to have to pay in taxes?" Like they can find the bad in everything.
26
And they're that way because they have accidentally, I'm sure they didn't do it on purpose, they've accidentally wired themselves to find the bad in everything.
27
But people who really actually become resilient and develop a really resilient mindset are different.
28
The people who have done the inner work and worked on themselves
29
and worked on their mindset and worked on their trauma and worked on their past and everything, they see life differently than everybody else.
30
Like those who have spent time going and finding the things that's going on, like in the trenches, in their mind and in their life, the ones that are doing the real inner work,
31
they don't collapse when things get hard.
32
Why is that?
33
Because they've trained their brain to find the good, even if it's hidden under layers and layers and layers of chaos.
34
Now, I want to be very clear.
35
I'm not talking about toxic positivity.
36
I'm talking about you finding good
37
in anything that's happening so
38
that you can become a better person thinking better to work out of whatever negative thing is happening in your life.
39
This is called neurological resilience.
40
It's like you learn to internalize the truth behind the yin and the yang, which is within every hard thing, there is something good.
41
And even if it's tiny, if you search for it, you can find it.
42
You just have to be willing to look.
43
And so I want you to remember this phrase the rest of your life.
44
Happiness is a choice.
45
Now, that phrase...
46
When I put it on Instagram or I talk about it on an Instagram Reel, it pisses a lot of people off.
47
It triggers a lot of people.
48
Because they're like, "Well, you don't know my life and you don't know what's happened to me."
49
You have to understand not some feel -good slogan.
50
And I'm not being all woo -woo when I'm like, "Hey, happiness is a choice.
51
Your life is on fire.
52
Act like it's not on fire." What I'm saying is not a feel -good slogan.
53
It's neuroscience.
54
Your brain is always rewiring itself.
55
always.
56
And every time that you try to find something good, which means that you are not being on autopilot anymore,
57
but you're actually taking time and energy and intention to find something good,
58
you're actually strengthening the part of your brain that is responsible for positive pattern recognition.
59
Now, on the opposite side of that,
60
if you are actually looking for the for negative pattern recognition.
61
And so in neuroscience, there's a thing called Hebb's Law, and they say neurons that fire together, wire together, which means that anytime that you think something a certain way,
62
that wiring becomes stronger.
63
And if you decide that you want to think differently, you're going to actually start to wire together new neurons that have never been together.
64
And so when you practice happiness and gratitude and finding the good in things, especially when you don't feel like it,
65
you're actually literally reshaping your brain You're doing three different things.
66
You're strengthening your prefrontal cortex, which is where your decision -making and your optimism comes from.
67
You're soothing your amygdala, which is where your fear and your threat detection comes from.
68
And you're building more dopamine receptors in your brain, which is where motivation and pleasure comes from.
69
So over time, this actually will become your new default setting.
70
So you don't even have to try to find the good in things.
71
You'll actually just start living that way.
72
And I can tell you, from 100 % in my own anecdotal story Trust me,
73
I was the definition of a negative Nancy when I was younger.
74
I could find the negative in anything and I could give excuses
75
and I could tell you why I was screwed over all the time
76
and why life wasn't working out for me and other people always had good luck and I had bad luck.
77
But now my default setting is to find the good in everything.
78
But I also do, just so you know, have the overall, because now that I've been living my life now for a while, and I've seen things happen for my benefit,
79
even when I didn't think they were going to be in my benefit, I truly believe, and I have this like just thought over my entire life,
80
that with all 40 trillion of my cells, I believe it, that...
81
everything that's happening in my life is happening for me.
82
Not happening to me, because if it's happening to me, I'm a victim.
83
If it's happening for me, then it's actually happening for me to learn or grow or get better or to have a better life.
84
And I believe that to my core.
85
And so let's actually tell you with research.
86
So I gave you my anecdotal, oh yeah, this is what happened in my life, but I don't wanna just give you fluff, I wanna actually talk real studies for those of you guys that want proof, right?
87
So there was a study that was done at Indiana University where they used fMRI scans to show participants who practice gratitude.
88
and they showed that the people who practice gratitude showed more activity in the medial prefrontal cortex of their brain,
89
which is the area that's linked to learning and decision making.
90
They studied them six months later, and they actually found that the effects lasted over six months after the study ended.
91
Which means when you train yourself to look for the good in something, your brain eventually starts doing it on autopilot.
92
Now, I don't want to give you just one study in case you're very, you need a lot of studies and really a lot of proof to believe me.
93
There was actually a study that was done by Dr. Martin Segelman, who is considered the father of positive psychology,
94
and showed that people who practice optimistic reframing, so whenever something happens, you find the optimism in that situation,
95
were more likely to recover from setbacks and experience less depression in their lives over time.
96
And then the last one, Harvard psychologist Dr. Shawn Acker found that five minutes a day of positive journaling
97
and finding the positive in their life significantly increased happiness and reduced stress hormones like cortisol in somebody's brain.
98
So this isn't, like I said, toxic positivity, like, oh my god, the house is on fire.
99
I'm just going to act like it's not on fire.
100
It's not toxic positivity, it's neurological facts that your brain actually starts to change and rewire itself.
101
for the good and finding the good when you actually take time
102
and intention to find the good in anything that's going bad.
103
And you have to understand that the rewiring is not something that just happens instantly.
104
It's not like you do it one time.
105
But if you stay consistent, it will be inevitable.
106
the way you like to think of, the way you should think of your brain is kind of like a big cornfield, right?
107
Like think of your brain like this giant cornfield and this new, maybe you've been negative your entire life and you're just trying to figure out how to be more positive.
108
Every time that you choose to find the good, even when it's buried, even when it's in the middle of a bunch of chaos, it's like walking a new path.
109
the very first time in that cornfield.
110
Is it gonna be hard to walk through a cornfield?
111
If it's a brand new path, yeah.
112
But the next time you do it, it's gonna be a little bit easier.
113
And the next time you do it, a little bit easier.
114
The hundredth time you do it, it's gonna be way easier.
115
Eventually, that path becomes clearer.
116
it becomes easier for you to walk down, aka to start to think through,
117
and it becomes a road that you actually will start to take in your brain over time, even without thinking after a while.
118
But the truth that most people avoid in this situation is you do have to push yourself.
119
Like you have to push yourself sometimes to when you see shit hitting the fan, be like, okay, I've got to get out of my victim mindset.
120
I've got to stop being so sad and I've got to figure out.
121
What is the good that could possibly come from this?
122
How could this be working out in my favor?
123
What lessons can I get from this?
124
It's like happiness just doesn't float down from the clouds and it's not delivered to you by a unicorn, right?
125
Like you don't just wait for something to make you feel happy.
126
You have to decide that my natural state will be happiness.
127
So you have to sit there and say, I'm going to find one thing to be grateful for today.
128
I will shift my focus, even when my brain wants to catastrophize everything and think that my life is in shambles.
129
I'm going to stop feeding this victim story in my head, and I'm going to find out how the world is working for me.
130
Because if you don't, your brain will just keep collecting evidence that your life sucks.
131
And that's a natural part of our brain.
132
It's called the negativity bias.
133
It's like this way in almost every single person.
134
I've done entire episodes on the negativity bias you can go back and listen to.
135
So your brain will always look for and collect evidence.
136
that things are going wrong as a protection mechanism for you.
137
And so you know who also collects evidence?
138
Your subconscious mind.
139
And whatever you think about a lot And whatever you repeat the most, it will believe.
140
So if you say stuff like, "Oh, I'm stuck," or, "I don't have any good luck," or, "Nothing ever works out for me," or, "Life is just hard and I'm always screwed over," Guess what?
141
That is actually going to become your truth.
142
And so what you want to do is this: when something becomes hard, acknowledge it.
143
I'm not saying, don't be like, "Oh my god, no, this is, yeah, no, it's completely fine." I'm not saying that you need to, you know, spray perfume on a turd.
144
What I'm saying is clean up the turd and then make the floor that was once on shinier.
145
Find the good in that thing. So acknowledge.
146
Okay, yeah, this is tough.
147
This is really hard.
148
I really do feel it.
149
then you want to just breathe through it.
150
Because when stuff is really hard, your brain's usually all over the place.
151
And when your emotions are high, your logic is low.
152
So you breathe.
153
Anchor yourself in the present moment.
154
It might be two minutes you need to breathe or if shit's really hitting the fan, it might be ten minutes.
155
And then just ask yourself to try to see, you know, change your perception in some sort of way from this is so bad, this is so bad, this is so bad and doom and gloom.
156
Ask yourself, What can this teach me?
157
Like what's one good thing that could come from this?
158
Like how can this circumstance possibly make me stronger.
159
Or like, if everything is happening for me, That must mean that this thing's gonna make me better.
160
So what lessons can I pull from this?
161
I And it might be like, you know, I'm actually learning to ask for help.
162
Or this pain that's happening is showing me that I need to figure out new boundaries.
163
Or it could be even, "I'm still here in that something." And you can find the good in the fact that you're still here.
164
And that becomes your access point for starting to rewire.
165
So it's like, what good can come from this?
166
What lessons can I pull from this?
167
How can I make this make me stronger?
168
What can this teach me?
169
And you start to actually ask yourself these questions, because when you ask yourself a question, or ask anybody a question, you're framing their perception.
170
And you're framing your own perception from something's wrong, this is not good, to what can I learn from this?
171
How can I get better in this?
172
And so I want you to understand, in your life, happiness is a choice.
173
It really is.
174
And if you're going to have a great life, if you're going to be happy in your life, then you need to make the choice that no matter what happens,
175
You're going to end up having a great life
176
that everything in this universe that happens around you is happening for you for your greater good.
177
You're not the story of your past.
178
You're the narrator of it, and you're the person who gets to reframe everything that's happened to you, to reinterpret everything that's happened to you,
179
to rewrite everything that's happened to you, and to see it from a different perspective.
180
And like life gets hard.
181
You're not going to go through this life without at least a decent amount of pain.
182
But when you're hardwired for growth, you push yourself, you smile through the tears, you laugh in the middle of chaos,
183
and you keep finding the gold that's hidden inside of the dirt.
184
Because every single time that you do, what you're doing is you're building yourself and your brain neurologically into a stronger,
185
happier, and more powerful version of you.
186
Hey, thanks so much for watching this video.
187
Based off of what you have been watching recently, YouTube thinks that this video right here is the crafted for you based off of your algorithm.
188
And if you want to make sure not to miss any more videos, go ahead and hit that subscribe button and I'll see you on the next one.
📺 Same Channel
B2The Day You Realize No One Cares About You… Everything Changes
Daily ConversationWorking Adults
B12
You Vs You "Drop a YES in you agree! 👉 IG:@robdialjr #motivation #selfdevelopment #personalgrowth
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B26
How NOT to Let Your Past Control Your Future
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B21
How To Get What You Want In Life
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B25
How to (Actually) Shift Your Identity (to Succeed)
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B12
Their Mood Isn’t Your Responsibility. 👉 IG:@robdialjr #selfdevelopment #selflove #motivation
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B21
Never React, Never Explain, Just Ignore
Daily ConversationWorking Adults
B21
5 Habits that Changed My Life in 1 Week
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B2Do This for 30 Days and Your Life Will Change
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B119
Easy now & hard later OR hard now & easy later👉 IG:@robdialjr #selfdevelopment #motivation
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B23
Become addicted to discipline in 1 day
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B22
4 Things That Are Keeping You From Being a High Performer
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B21
5 Things to Tell Yourself Every Morning
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B24
When You Finally Stop Living in Your Head, Life Becomes Peaceful Again
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B22
Once you apply this, the Universe will have no choice but to give you everything.
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
C13
Act As If EVERYTHING Always Works Out
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B22
How to Teach Yourself Anything (The Self-Study Blueprint)
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
C13
WHY YOU SHOULD QUIT YOUR JOB!
Business EnglishWorking Adults
B23
7 Principles That Will Organize Your Entire Life
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B21
How To Rewire Your Brain To Enjoy Discipline
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
✨ Recommend Video
B21
252 sentences
Teach Your Brain To Become Someone New | Andrew Huberman Motivation
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B22
263 sentences
5 Habits of *Genuinely* Happy People (no toxic positivity required)
American AccentBusiness EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B21
176 sentences
The Psychology of a Winter Arc That Actually Works!
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B24
16 sentences
Listen carefully. #motivation #mindset #success #growth
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B24
10 sentences
Why hard times keep happening to you
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B2136 sentences
Are you making yourself miserable?
Business EnglishDaily ConversationUniversity Students
B21
109 sentences
Give me 5 minutes to show you WHY it's gonna be okay *no matter what*
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B21
277 sentences
Why You Can't Do Hard Things
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B22
625 sentences
The Most Valuable 40 Minutes You’ll Spend This Year (Hormozi x Williamson)
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B21
226 sentences
Strengthen Your Mind or the World Will Break You | Jim Rohn Motivation
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B21
230 sentences
Self-Sabotage, Self-Forgiveness & Why the Way You Talk to Yourself Is Everything
Business EnglishUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
Context & Background
The video titled "Push Yourself to Be Happy Even When Life is Hard" revolves around the concepts of happiness, mental resilience, and the mindset necessary to navigate life's challenges. The speaker vividly discusses how negative thoughts can spiral out of control during tough times. By reframing our perspective and practicing positivity, even in difficult situations, we can cultivate a happier mindset. This approach is essential for developing what the speaker refers to as neurological resilience, where individuals learn to find the good amidst chaos. This video serves as a valuable resource for English learners looking to enhance their vocabulary and comprehension regarding emotional well-being and coping strategies.
Top 5 Phrases for Daily Communication
- “Happiness is a choice.” – A powerful reminder that we can choose how to respond to life's challenges.
- “You have to be willing to look.” – This encourages proactive searching for positivity in situations.
- “Your brain becomes a magnet for misery.” – A metaphor explaining how negative thinking can attract more negativity.
- “Train your brain to find the good.” – Suggests practice and effort are needed to reshape our thinking.
- “Within every hard thing, there is something good.” – Emphasizes the duality present in all experiences.
Step-by-step Shadowing Guide
To effectively improve your English speaking skills using the shadowing technique with this video, follow these steps:
- Choose the right environment: Find a quiet space where you won’t be interrupted, allowing you to focus fully on the video.
- Watch the video once: First, watch the video without repetition to grasp the overall message. Pay attention to the speaker’s tone and emotion.
- Enable subtitles: Turn on English subtitles to follow along, aiding your comprehension of the vocabulary and phrases mentioned.
- Pause and repeat: Play short segments of the video, then pause and repeat what the speaker says aloud. This practice helps you match their pace and pronunciation.
- Use a shadowing app: Consider using a shadowing app to record your voice as you practice alongside the speaker. This allows you to compare your intonation to theirs.
- Reflect on the content: After practicing, spend a few minutes reflecting on the phrases or concepts that stood out. Utilize them in your daily communications to reinforce learning.
By utilizing this approach, you not only enhance your English speaking skills but also internalize vital life lessons on resilience and positivity. Join the community of learners who utilize learn English with YouTube to enrich their language skills in an engaging way, and together, let's make the most out of every challenge you face!
Grammar in this video
The structures the speaker uses most, with the exact words from the video:
| Structure | In the video |
|---|---|
| Present perfect continuous have/has been + -ing — an action that started earlier and is still going on | I've been living · have been watching |
| Conditional sentences if + clause, will/would + verb — a condition and its result | if you stay consistent, it will be · if you don't, your brain will just |
| Relative clauses who / which + clause — extra information about a person or thing | people who really · people who have · those who have |
| Present perfect have/has + past participle — a past action that still matters now | have done · have spent · they've trained |
What is the Shadowing Technique?
Shadowing is a science-backed language learning technique originally developed for professional interpreter training and popularized by polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. The method is simple but powerful: you listen to native English audio and immediately repeat it out loud — like a shadow following the speaker with just a 1–2 second delay. Unlike passive listening or grammar drills, shadowing forces your brain and mouth muscles to simultaneously process and reproduce real speech patterns. Research shows it significantly improves pronunciation accuracy, intonation, rhythm, connected speech, listening comprehension, and speaking fluency — making it one of the most effective methods for IELTS Speaking preparation and real-world English communication.