Shadowing Practice: Taking a Look at "Men Writing Women"... - Learn English Speaking with Video
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Hello, my name is Emily, as you may or may not know, and today, today, we are scholars.
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Today we are scholars, and oh, this is giving me a headache because I have my contacts in.
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I think it is bad to put your glasses on and have your contacts in at the same time.
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But alas, sometimes you must do it for the bit, and sometimes the bit isn't even that good and it lasts ten seconds.
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But today, we are scholars.
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We are going to be diving in to...
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I need to look at my script.
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Today, we are going to be taking a look at the way some male authors, you know, they combine words to create such a poetic concoction of language that really,
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really, you know, paints a picture for the viewer.
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However, sometimes the only thing that is in frame in that picture is a pair of tits.
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It has been noticed that some male authors, when they write their female characters,
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they write about them in a way that makes it seem as
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if they have never interacted with a woman before
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so today we are going to read some excerpts from these literary revolutionists right
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and listen these are just snippets from these books obviously I haven't gone through
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and read in its entirety every single book
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that is going to be you know looked at here so who knows maybe within the context of the entire book, these excerpts are not as offensive.
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You know, maybe it's the character in of himself who is just like a sexist piece of shit
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and it's not the author necessarily or the book as a whole.
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So, you know, who knows?
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Just leaving room for that so I don't get comments down below that are like, actually, this author has donated to multiple women's shelters and that and da da da da.
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You know, it's, we're just here for a gag
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and a giggle a gag and a giggle
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but anyways let's just get into it shall we she had
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to sit on the toilet some minutes waiting for the pee
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to come men they were able to conjure it up immediately
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that was one of their powers that thunderous splashing as they stood lordly above the bowl
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love that the author describes men's ability to pee quickly as a superpower
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like okay yeah Derek stopping the bad guys by having just
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like a super strong piss stream just like pissing really hard
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on the bad guys it's like the power of Poseidon has taken over my penis with the stream
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that thunderous splashing that ear -splitting rumble
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that shakes the foundation of the city you know it's a well -known fact about the male species
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that whenever they take a piss there only using about an eighth of their power
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and that's to keep everyone else safe you know
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if every man in the world were to use their the
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power of their full stream at once unfortunately the world would
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be encountering somewhat of a lemonade tsunami moving on to the
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rest everything about them was more direct their insides weren't the maze
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that women's were for the pee to find its way through.
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Yes, I can actually speak on behalf of all women here.
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Our urethras are around two miles long and there is essentially a sailor's knot every two centimeters.
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Now this is a true story, okay?
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When I was studying anatomy and we were working with a real human female cadaver, I almost put her urethra in my Shirley Temple because I thought it was a crazy straw.
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Dino put his feet up and chatted for a couple of minutes.
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Then he put down the phone
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and returned to the table okay he said the me confirms
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his first estimate of time of death the girl had a
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tiny purse ducked into her virginia just big enough to hold her driver's license a credit card
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and a few bucks her name was elizabeth sweeney oh no
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liz girl not liz sweeney girl why did you have a
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tiny purse in your down under literally in your down under pov you're liz at the airport
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and they say id please and you say of course one second
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and the next thing you know you're laying on the ground
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of lax spread eagle you're just rummaging in there like a
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raccoon rummaging through a trash can like it's got to be
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in here some you know you know this place is like
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a labyrinth right does anyone have a pair of forceps tongs even
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or imagine during the autopsy instead of them being like oh
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we found a tiny little poly pocket purse they were like we found a ginormous bag.
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Luggage, practically.
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We inspected Miss Sweeney's southern border and we did find a literal Mary Poppins bag.
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Uh, yeah, you know, we pulled out some Tupperware, a 1957 Chevy, some stuff from Ikea, missing child.
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But you know what the authorities would find in my purse?
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My Scentbird perfume.
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Listen, there are some things that I can't leave the house without or else I feel naked. And a...
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Brits of my scentbird perfume is one of those things.
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I feel like having on a good perfume is honestly like having on a good outfit, you know, it just makes you feel more confident and, you know, move more confidently throughout the world.
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World, behold my scent!
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The scents that I got this time around were Ariana Grande's Cloud, Catherine Malendrino's Mystery, but I'm pretty sure it's French,
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so Mysterie, Mysterie, House of Beaux's Rosario, and Vince Camuto's Chao.
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My two favorites are Chao by Vince Camuto and Rosario by House of Beaux.
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For Chao, the top notes are rose, berries, amber, jasmine, and Italian Mandarin.
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It's super fresh, floral, and fruity.
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And for Rosario, the top notes are pomegranate, lemon primo fiore, rose sensifolia, incense, and vetiver.
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It's a little bit of a stronger scent, which I like, but it's still delicate, clean, and citrusy.
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Scentbird is affordable and minimizes the risk of you buying an entire bottle of perfume
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that you might not even end up liking.
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Their selection is super diverse, with popular brands like Prada and Versace, and then some more niche brands like Parfums de Marly and Roja.
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Your first month is only $8, and then after that it's less than $17 a month.
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You get a 30 -day supply of each fragrance, so it gives you plenty of time to fully experience the scent, and who knows, maybe even find your new signature fragrance.
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Their quiz allows you to curate your options according to your taste
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so that you can get matched with perfumes and colognes that match your desires.
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Scentbird also offers a Scentbird Academy Masterclass where you get to learn more about fragrances and perfumes in collaboration with Jo Malone.
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And, of course, we can't forget about Scentbird's very cute and easy -to -carry packaging.
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I mean, just look at this.
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And the colors, it's so summer.
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I can super easily fit my Scentbird perfumes into my purses, my totes, even my pocket, so that way I can give myself a little spritz even when I'm out and about.
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So if you're interested in smelling super good and you want to try out Scentbird, make sure to scan the QR code on the screen
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or use the link below and use my code 55EMILY to get 55 % off at Scentbird.
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Plus, you'll get free delivery to your door and a free case.
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You get the product for only half the price.
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That's only eight dollars.
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Eight dollars, y 'all.
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Call the cops, because that's a steal.
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So make sure to go find your new signature scent, and thank you, Scentbird, for sponsoring today's video.
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Okay, now on to the next.
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I apologize.
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I did have to get some H2O because I am sweating like a pig at a roast.
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Like I've stated before, the ham hocks have some condensation on them.
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Okay.
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Cheers to objectifying women.
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We should all do that more often, you know, whether it be through literature or movies or TV or even real life.
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All right, next one.
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Rick did not pause to analyze the psychology of the pregnant woman.
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It had not occurred to him that pregnancy was complete paradox.
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It was paradoxical in that only the female of the species could perform the amazing feat, while perhaps being the less psychologically prepared for it than a male would have been.
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No woman enjoys the sight of sagging breasts and a bulging stomach, no matter how maternal her urge.
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A woman's good looks are a woman's good looks, and there's little good looking about a pregnant woman." Right,
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right, yeah I'm sure women love you, Rick.
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He's like, women are less psychologically prepared for such an amazing feat.
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And it's like, are they?
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If we want to talk about the baseline psychological state of people, women, pregnant or not, are they the ones who are committing mass murders and starting wars?
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Oh wait, no, I don't think so.
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I think that's actually men who aren't even going through any hormonal imbalances or postpartum psychosis.
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They're just being themselves.
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Also, the last part here where he says, a woman's good looks or woman's good looks
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and there is little good looking about a pregnant woman you
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know i'm just i'm imagining this guy as a doctor right
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and and he's giving you an ultrasound
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and he's like yep precisely as i predicted you're a fucking uggo
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so uh you see the test here yeah it has two lines on it you know what
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that means saggy tits i was staring into two of the
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most beautifully tipped breasts the world had ever known they were full
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and round and using the standard measure three and a half milliboobs per handful.
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Yes, the standard measure.
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Right.
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That's how they measured me at Victoria's Secret.
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They measured me and said, yep, you're negative five kilotits per hour.
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Just imagine being in the middle of hooking up with this guy and he's like, ah, yes, precisely as I have predicted, three and a half milliboobs per handful.
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Right, ah, yes.
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Yet again, my hypothesis has rang true.
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Oh, you're getting an Uber already?
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If the square root of the nipple equals the buoyancy of the breast, then, of course, tits squared must equal hunkers divided by four.
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Also, beautifully tipped?
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What does that mean?
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Like, it turned an iPad around at you and you hit 35 %?
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Oh, that's a beautiful tip.
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Me flashing someone my boobs and then immediately handing them an iPad for a tip?
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and they're like, what?
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I didn't ask you to do that.
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I'm actually calling the cops.
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And here's my question.
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What's the standard measure for schlong?
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For schlong, okay?
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Three and a half millid...
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I guess it would just be inches.
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She's in her 30s.
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Not all that young, Spellbrin said.
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Stretch marks.
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So she's had at least one child.
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Okay, so this isn't the worst thing ever, and I think some people would agree, you know, 30 isn't all that young.
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It's not a super outrageous statement
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but i do need to go off for a second just in regards to aging and women
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because y 'all are about to drive me crazy you know there's this huge societal thing about women
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and aging where it's like when you turn 25 after
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that it's like oh damn she's in her crypt creeper era you hit your 30s
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and all of a sudden someone replaces your mattress with a
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coffin it's like who what how did you get in my
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house like not too long ago i saw a tweet about miley cyrus that was like she aged like fine wine.
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The woman is 31.
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Like, what do you mean aged like fine wine?
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It's still, she's still juice.
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Sorry, I had to put my hair up.
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It's literally hot as freaking balls and tight shorts in Arizona in July, okay?
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But I was at this party, and we were in a group, and one of the women, we were talking about our ages, one of the women was like, oh yeah, I'm 29.
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And then someone else who was like 24 literally
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so earnestly looked at this woman and said oh my god you're 29
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what's your skincare routine oh what and i literally interrupted
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and was like she's 29 like what are you talking about
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this isn't a grape versus raisin situation i'm sorry i'm gonna get a little worked up
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and perhaps a bit unpleasant for a moment but i remember
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when i graduated uh college and everyone around me was like oh my gosh we're
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so old now we're
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so we're practically elderly i can't believe how old we are
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what the hell are you talking about bitch we're 22 shut
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the hell up you know i just i think it irritates me
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so much because i'm just very cognizant of how people treat women uh especially as they age
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but i feel like a lot of
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that treatment towards women obviously most of it is done by society
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but because obviously things in society are very ingrained
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so we are also conditioned to think that way
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but we're imposing it on ourselves
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when we say those things you know what I mean like I just refuse to give into
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that you know especially as a woman I refuse to talk like
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that cuz I would have people around me who are my age
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and are talking about how old they are and this or that and I'm just like I don't feel old.
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I have my whole life ahead of me.
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I don't know what you guys are talking about.
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Sounds like a you problem.
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The cold air made my hair stand up from the roots, the way my Nepal's stood erect.
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Ew, er, not ill, that's natural,
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but every follicle on my arms and legs becoming a tiny glee -torist.
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Glee -torist.
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And every cell of me awake and alert at rigid attention.
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Now, what the hell?
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Every follicle, every follicle on my arms and legs becoming a Glee Taurus.
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You're joking.
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You're joking.
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That would, that would be, you would just roll around on the floor and you'd be hitting all the right spots.
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Because the right spot is evidently all over your arms and legs.
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Um.
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I'm sorry.
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Imagine if you had a bunch of tiny glee tourists all over your your arms and legs that's like
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You go outside wearing you know a tank top
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and shorts a little light breeze and then all of a sudden you're you're
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Climbing climax mountain at and you're reaching the peak
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The voice belonged to a plump round -faced woman of the sort
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that develops a good personality because the alternative is sewer of the side
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god almighty oh this is so mean imagine meeting someone for the first time
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and this is what's going on in their inner monologue they're shaking your hand like thank you
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so much for all of your kindness meanwhile in the back
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of their mind they're just wondering how you're able to look at your reflection in the morning
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and not tie yourself to train tracks by lunchtime i understand
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that we live in an extremely fat phobic society so fat phobic
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that we don't even recognize all the ways fat phobia are ingrained into our daily lives
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so I understand that fat people might feel
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that they need to be nicer so people don't have another reason to dislike them
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but it's funny that just this insinuates
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that once you get to a certain weight you're just not
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allowed to be a bitch anymore like oh I just gained 20 pounds now I can't be rude to people anymore
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Now I have to do volunteer work.
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I'm one buffet meal away from having to respect those around me.
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I like her.
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I could watch her the rest of my life.
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She has breasts that smile.
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You know, that's how you know that she's the one, okay?
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When her boobs are beaming like it's picture day.
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And when her boobs are asymmetrical, that's when you say, baby, you need braces.
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Asking a guy, so what do you like about me? and he says nothing about your personality, not even your facial features,
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it's just I love the way your boobs smile, and I love the way your ass sings, and your coochie shines in the moonlight.
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When she'd stopped crying, Madeline composed herself before the mirror.
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Her skin looked blotchy.
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Her breasts, of which she was normally proud, had withdrawn into themselves, as if depressed.
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What?
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Yeah, you know, they always say that a woman's emotions are so hard to figure out, but it's really quite easy,
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you know, if her boobs look like deflated airbags, faulty deflated airbags that would cause a vehicle recall,
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you know, it's safe to say she's pretty upset.
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You know, little life hack here, fellas, next time you're at a funeral, make sure to pay close attention to all of the women's hooters.
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You know, during the eulogy, don't even pay attention, just kind of scan the room.
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If a woman's talking to you, never look her directly in the eye, make eye contact with her nepals, right?
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And you can tell that all of their breasts will likely be very, very borderline to their knees.
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All the women in mourning, you know, they're fun bags, essentially, not so fun anymore they're gonna look like ziploc bags filled with hot concrete.
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Now if you see a woman at a funeral with perky breasts, she's happy that they died.
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You know what I'm gonna do?
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I'm gonna fake my own funeral and I'm gonna invite all of my friends with breasts.
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For those who don't have breasts, you can stay home and watch the live stream.
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And if every single one of y 'all's honkers are not draped to the floor, I'm busting out of the casket and I'm gonna say all of you are fake.
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Imagine I get out of the casket and I'm still alive and then that's when everyone's boobs deflate.
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They're like, oh, I thought you were dead.
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Describe yourself, Nell wrote.
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Nothing special, I'm afraid, wrote the Duke.
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How about yourself?
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Slightly taller than average, flashing green eyes, raven hair falling in luxuriant waves to my waist, unless I pin it up to emphasize my high cheekbones and full lips,
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narrow waist, perch breasts, long legs, alabaster skin that flushes vividly when i am passionate about something
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which is frequently your description is reminiscent of my late wife
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god rest her soul oh yeah yeah you know who you
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remind me of my dead wife not the dead wife love
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that the duke was just like yeah you know i'm a little uggoville nothing to write home about you know
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and then she was like i on the other hand was carved from marble
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that was taken from heaven's palace by God's gentle hand.
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This whole thing was clearly written by a man but I am kind of obsessed with her answer to be honest.
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You know I'm just imagining someone asking you what do you look like
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and then going on to describe yourself in the way
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that a medieval male author would and he's you know like writing smut.
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Oh what do I look like well I'm so glad you ask.
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I have long golden locks that cascade down my bountiful bosom
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and then of course I can't forget about my bodacious backside that is soft and supple.
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Softer than the velvet of the king's throne.
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And then the other person is just like, okay you could have just said you were blonde.
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Pointy chin and hollow cheeks, crowned by prominent cheekbones and full breasts.
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Here we go again with the full breasts all of the
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breasts are full like okay it's beginning to get a little
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bit like florals for spring like okay we got it full breasts
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that visibly strained at the breast bone like two puppies pulling
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on their leashes in slightly diverging directions she had long legs
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and a disproportionately
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and disproportionately small feet the big toe aristocratically shorter than the others she wasn't fussy at all or coy
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or full of feminine wiles it sounds like this woman needs
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a breast reduction visibly straining at the breastbone i mean i
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just know her back is killing her you know how people
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always say i carry the weight of the world on my
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shoulders well this woman carries it in her breasts she has
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the entire solar system in her breasts you know it's saturn
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and uranus hey like i don't understand like is this supposed
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to be a compliment i mean two puppies pulling on their leashes in diverging directions you know Two,
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two full breasts diverge out of yellow wood.
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You know, the next beautiful woman I see, I'm gonna compliment her by staring directly at her chest and saying, Are those two wild, untrained Yorkies, or are you just happy to see me?
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Intensely black hair.
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Tragic eyes that were jungle green, crowned by full eyebrows, raised in slight surprise.
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Lips as if silicone -filled, but in reality fattened merely by the nature of ephemeral ethnic mixtures.
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Condé saw himself threatened by the small bazingas pointing skyward like surface -to -air missiles
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and perceived at the woman's hips either as an oasis of peace or as a battlefield.
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A battlefield?
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What?
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Who are you fighting?
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He's in between her legs like, you know what this reminds me of?
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Nom.
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Has anyone ever told you that your Véginier has the same aura as the War of 1812?
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You know, her beauty was the type of beauty that men went to war for,
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and that said war took place in Vageville of Jina County.
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Gonday's male chauvinism, which could not be helped,
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right, forced him to consider that sexy women who loved other women as a painful waste of evolution.
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Oh, here we go!
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I'm gonna rant again.
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This really is art imitates life because multiple men, multiple men, and I know many other lesbians who have had this experience have told me you know to my face
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and of course plenty online
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that me not liking men is a waste no it's not
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first of all I'm not here for you to consume I'm
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not a fucking whopper also like okay well oh it's such
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a waste for men we're not gonna be able to get a you're not accessible to us
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but you're forgetting the most important part which is
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that it's a win for women also and types of men who are saying this stuff to me, do you honestly think that even if I did have the desire to date men,
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that you would be someone I would choose?
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Let's do some critical thinking, babes.
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Some critical thinking.
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Like, the type of men who have the mindset
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that lesbians are a waste because they are not able to sexually pursue them, those are not the types of men that I would be dating
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if I were straight or even bi okay
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so why don't you chew on that and choke on it
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but Amber kind green -eyed Amber with her long red curls her cinnamon flavored skin her Barbie doll vagina Amber
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that lovely girl she got there first so she doesn't have a vagina
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she pulls down her pants
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and it's just blank space by taylor swift not her virginia looking like the top of mr clean's head shiny
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and reflective you know psychics could could use her her virginia
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to tell fortunes her eyes look like they've been borrowed from someone beautiful
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just say she has pretty eyes good god man no your
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nose looks like it was forcibly stolen from someone who's gorgeous
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because you know the rest of you was just an assault on my senses
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or you know you could use this the opposite way too
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and say you know your entire body
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and face looks like it was borrowed from an ogre martha could feel the body yielding
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and the bones complaining and the breasts as
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if they had lives of their own sagging audibly in the night sagging audibly
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audibly sagging
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and the audio in question is just me standing in the
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corner of her room playing a trombone whenever she gets in or out of bed.
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She gets up in the middle of the night for a cup of water and I'm like, oh, that's my cue!
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Mwah, mwah, mwah.
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Her neighbors call like, Beth, I can hear your saggy puppies!
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Again, alright.
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Frank and I are going crazy.
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You woke up the babies.
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Alright, get your tatas under control or we're gonna be filing another noise complaint.
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Comment down below if your boobs sagged and they had to make a noise, what type of noise would they make?
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I think mine would be, like, something like.. or maybe something like.. all right.
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So, with that, let's wrap it up.
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My camera is seriously gonna die, so I'm gonna have to rush this.
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Apologies.
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Thank you all for watching today's video.
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If you're a male author, maybe use this video as what not to do,
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right uh all right awesome anything else yeah okay i hope you learned a lot about the female body
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all right thank you thank you for watching love you guys until next time
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Vocabulary and speaking notes for this lesson
This speaking lesson is built on the video “Taking a Look at "Men Writing Women"..”. This video has 353 sentences and 4279 words to shadow. The speech runs for 24:34. The speaker talks at a natural 174 words per minute, close to everyday conversation. Only 79% of the words are among the 3,000 most common in English, so the vocabulary is demanding.
Key vocabulary in this video
15 words from the video worth learning, with pronunciation and meaning:
| Word | Pronunciation | Meaning |
|---|---|---|
| breast noun | /bɹɛst/ | Either of the two organs on the front of a female human's chest, which contain the mammary glands; also the analogous organs in males. |
| perfume noun | /ˈpɝfjuːm/ | A pleasant smell; the scent, odor, or odoriferous particles emitted from a sweet-smelling substance; a pleasant odor. |
| amber noun | /ˈæm.bəː/ | A hard, generally yellow to brown translucent or transparent fossil resin from extinct coniferous trees of the pine genus, used for jewellery, decoration and… |
| purse noun | /pɚs/ | A small bag for carrying money. |
| scent noun | /sɛnt/ | A distinctive smell. |
| funeral noun | /ˈfju.nəɹ.əl/ | A ceremony to honor and remember a deceased person, often distinguished from a memorial service by the presence of the body of the deceased. |
| puppy noun | /ˈpʌpi/ | A young rat. |
| scholar noun | /ˈskɑlɚ/ | A student; one who studies at school or college, typically having a scholarship. |
| pocket noun | /ˈpɑ.kɪt/ | A bag stitched to an item of clothing, used for carrying small items. |
| bone noun | /boʊn/ | A composite material consisting largely of calcium phosphate and collagen and making up the skeleton of most vertebrates. |
| duke noun | /dʒuːk/ | The male ruler of a duchy (female equivalent: duchess). |
| flash verb | /flæʃ/ | To cause to shine briefly or intermittently. |
| essentially adverb | /ɪˈsɛnʃəli/ | In essence: by nature. |
| steal verb | /stiːl/ | To take illegally, or without the owner's permission, something owned by someone else without intending to return it. |
| sudden adjective | /ˈsʌd.ən/ | Occurring quickly with little or no warning or expectation; instantly. |
Phrasal verbs you will hear
| Word | Meaning |
|---|---|
| go through verb | To travel from one end of something to the other. |
| end up verb | To bring to a conclusion. |
| figure out verb | To come to understand; to discover or find a solution; to deduce. |
| get out of verb | To leave, exit or escape from; to become free of. |
| pull down verb | To make (something) lower (especially of clothes). |
| pull out verb | To withdraw; especially of military forces; to retreat. |
| put down verb | To insult, belittle, or demean. |
| take over verb | To assume control of something, such as a business or enterprise, and sometimes by force. |
Sentences worth repeating
Short, complete lines from the video that you can reuse in everyday conversation:
- I didn't ask you to do that.
- I'm actually calling the cops.
- What's the standard measure for schlong?
- I don't know what you guys are talking about.
- You know what I'm gonna do?
Grammar in this video
The structures the speaker uses most, with the exact words from the video:
| Structure | In the video |
|---|---|
| Passive voice be + past participle — the focus is on what happens, not who does it | has been noticed · is done · are also conditioned |
| Present perfect have/has + past participle — a past action that still matters now | has been noticed · have never interacted · haven't gone |
| Relative clauses who / which + clause — extra information about a person or thing | ones who are · men who aren · those who don |
Pronunciation to watch
The speaker uses 105 contractions and reduced forms, such as I'm, you're, gonna. Say them the short way, as you hear them.
- The “th” sounds: ethnic /ˈɛθ.nɪk/, eighth /eɪtθ/, throne /θɹəʊ̯n/, threaten /ˈθɹɛt.n̩/, thunderous /ˈθʌn.də.ɹəs/
- The “sh” and “zh” sounds: flash /flæʃ/, essentially /ɪˈsɛnʃəli/, splash /splæʃ/, rush /ɹʌʃ/, trash /tɹæʃ/
- Long words — get the stress right: essentially /ɪˈsɛnʃəli/, practically /ˈpɹæk.tɪ.k(ə.)li/, beautifully /ˈbju.tɪ.fə.li/, necessarily /ˌnɛs.əˈsɛɹ.ə.li/, evolution /ˌiːvəˈluːʃ(ə)n/
How to practise with this video
- Listen to the whole video once without speaking and note the words you do not know.
- Start at 0.75× speed, shadow it sentence by sentence, then go back to normal speed once it feels easy.
- Record yourself and compare with the original, paying attention to words like breast, perfume, amber.
What is the Shadowing Technique?
Shadowing is a science-backed language learning technique originally developed for professional interpreter training and popularized by polyglot Dr. Alexander Arguelles. The method is simple but powerful: you listen to native English audio and immediately repeat it out loud — like a shadow following the speaker with just a 1–2 second delay. Unlike passive listening or grammar drills, shadowing forces your brain and mouth muscles to simultaneously process and reproduce real speech patterns. Research shows it significantly improves pronunciation accuracy, intonation, rhythm, connected speech, listening comprehension, and speaking fluency — making it one of the most effective methods for IELTS Speaking preparation and real-world English communication.