跟读练习: I don’t understand what we’re living for - 通过视频学习英语口语

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I don't know what I'm living for.

Life feels so painfully empty that it's something I don't even feel like I can even ignore anymore.

I've spent most of my life just following rules or following missions

and goals I thought were supposed to be the answer to the emptiness in my heart.

I'd blame it on my weight, I blame it on my appearance, I blame it on some random accolade that I need to achieve

and then I can start living my life then things can maybe begin to make sense.

A lot of the time I'd also use

that goal post as a way to tell myself well I know something deeper is wrong

but I first need to reach this goal to have a little bit of a barrier

or a protection and then I can begin to go to that vulnerable place.

The issue is I have been doing this for so long

that I am not even sure that there's a life worth living behind that.

What I mean is I am somebody that overthinks a lot, if you want to call it overthinking.

I'm someone that just thinks too much about things and I'm sure you are too.

You try and understand the world a bit too much

and it ruins the experience because you can't seem to make sense of it

and you can't seem to make sense of yourself in it, especially when you have pain.

And I remember throughout my childhood and adolescence, I spent a lot of time thinking about relationships,

about people, about what made people love you.

Because for me, if I made people love me, everything would be okay.

That was my main goal in life.

I needed to make as many people as possible love me and to do that I had to play a role.

I had to do this very specific formula I'd figured out a

while back to making someone love you and it was about not being too honest, it was about pretending this.

Anyways I won't go into the details about that random thing

but what I mean is what that represented for me was a way out of the suffering, it was a way out of the emptiness

and a feeling of having a footing somewhere

that made sense on this earth and obviously as the years went on

and my mental illness got worse and I lost

so much due to these very problematic behaviours and I realised

that they burnt me out more than they could ever save me.

I was forced in many therapy sessions to sit with myself and think about what would it look like to change?

What would it look like to not live this way, to let go of all these beliefs?

And I'm sure like a lot of you, the answer is often, I don't know, I've never thought about that.

It's never even felt like a possibility.

And to be honest, the whole idea of it sounds like a just a lie, a fantasy.

it doesn't seem real and my argument about that was that well

if it was real I would see happy people I would see conflicting evidence in my everyday life

and I would have seen it up until now

but I don't feel like I do when I look to the outside to try and first to try and begin

to find out what could possibly make someone want to live, make someone enjoy this experience of life.

It often feels like I'm trying to understand an equation.

Like an equation, you can probably solve it and someone will explain it to you slowly.

But at the end of the day, it just feels like a concept.

it's it's just letters and it's just numbers

and we've decided they mean something

and I feel like I am unable to fall back in love with life

when I think of relationships friendships romantic relationships goals career aspirations lifestyle hobbies I just feel confused

and it's a weird type of confusion it's not like the type of confusion

that feels like it can ever be worked through it's like

when you go through deep suffering you can either go one of two ways you can either grow

and learn a lot or you can crash and burn

but I also think there can sometimes to be this weird

middle ground where it's like the veil of what life really

is gets lifted you see behind the scenes you see the the fantasy isn't real you see

that friendships relationships a lot of it is selfish this unconditional love doesn't exist

because through your trauma you were forced to deeply perceive relationships

and realize that things were not unconditional and you that to protect yourself.

In friendships you could say well they're your friend until you start to be very inconvenient.

Let's say if you became really really really depressed people often say well that's what friends are for

but quietly they actually mean I will be your friend until this doesn't stop fast enough because everyone feels selfish,

which is our natural way of being.

So it's hard for me to fall back into the fantasy that, well, that's worth it because I don't feel anything for it anymore.

Hobbies, I see the concept of them, I see goals, I see the concept of them, I'm like yeah but what is that for?

If I am just still pursuing something to prove something, to use up this time on earth just to use it up,

it feels empty, it all feels empty and it's like I can't see the point in anything anymore.

It feels like this horrible veil has been lifted and I cannot fall back under the trance, the illusion of it all being worth it,

of it all having meaning, because obviously the meaning is created by the person.

But if I fundamentally disagree with everything that is around me, where do you go from there?

If I see relationships and friendships as this fake performance no matter what

if goals feel like another way of trying to you know prop myself up

and and prove to the world or prove to myself

or something that i'm worth something

if my career feels again like this weird thing of this

popularity thing this thing of feeling like oh i'm better than this person

and this person this protects me more or kids

or whatever makes people want to do things it just all feels like some iteration of the same shit.

Just playing this game that I just, you can't win at.

I don't feel connected to it.

And I don't know what you do with that.

I used to run away from this feeling by finding my meaning in literally, like I said previously, trying to make people love me.

Trying to do everything I could to be this illusion.

But that's not possible anymore and it doesn't even work long term.

The main question I have after all of this is what do people live for?

I do not understand any of it.

I bring myself oftentimes on the weekend to lakes,

to towns, and I try and just put my body into the situations to maybe create some spark again,

you know, something that wants to be here, that feels something, that feels this pull, this beauty.

I don't feel similar to somebody that has seen something that's

so violently horrendous that even when they're out of that situation

and they're back home safe with their family and with everything they could ever want, they just cannot fall back into love with life.

They just feel empty and they feel disconnected from people around them and they feel like everything is just empty.

Honestly, it scares me.

It really does.

because you don't hear a lot about

that part I feel I feel like you hear a lot

about people talking about very specific things they struggle with

and wanting specific solutions but this feels more existential

and it doesn't feel like it's something that I can answer

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and I think a lot of us feel this way

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and it's horrible it's absolutely horrible because it's something that is so so all-encompassing.

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It feels so much deeper than anything that anyone tries to make you worry about every day, yet you're still forced to play the role, play the performance, get up,

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go to work, put on a face and pretend you're not dealing with this.

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Try and do things on the weekend, you feel fundamentally pointless and I don't want to become a monk.

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I know oftentimes the answer to these things is, well, you've risen above the whole ego thing or you've risen above the whole

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role that society wants you to play

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and you've seen how empty it all is and you have to follow a different path.

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I don't want to follow a different path.

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I just want to enjoy my life.

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I just want to feel young because I spent my entire teenage years feeling like a 30, 40, I don't know.

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Now I'm in my early 20s and I've got my life back together,

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yet I can just sit in a room filled with peers my age and I just cannot connect to them.

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I cannot understand how they feel and I can't understand how I feel in that moment.

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No matter how much I try, no matter how much alcohol I drink, I just can't get there.

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It's like you get the first curse of dealing with these issues and then you get the double whammy of like,

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hey, and now these are fundamentally going to alienate you even more from people due to that experience itself,

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even if it's healed.

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so yeah the meaning of life i know everyone wonders that

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but i guess this is just something i wanted to vent i wanted to just talk about

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that i definitely will keep talking about it

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because it's honestly something i just keep thinking about

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and ruminating over you're not alone feeling this way and it's deeply terrifying and it's just yeah anyways see ya

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本课的词汇与口语要点

这节 B2 级别的口语课以视频“I don’t understand what we’re living for”为素材。这段视频共有 122 个句子、1710 个单词可供跟读。讲话部分时长为 10:45。说话人语速自然，每分钟约 159 个词，接近日常对话。 86% 的单词属于英语最常用的 3,000 词，其余的词建议在练习前先学一下。

视频中的重点词汇

视频中最难的 15 个单词，附发音和释义：

单词	发音	释义
fundamentally 副词		根本地, 从根本上
emptiness 名词		空虛 /空虚, 空洞
overthink 动词		想太多
unconditional 形容词	/ˌʌnkənˈdɪʃənəl/	無條件的 /无条件的
illusion 名词	/ɪˈl(j)uːʒ(ə)n/	幻想, 幻覺 /幻觉
hobby 名词	/ˈhɑ.bi/	愛好 /爱好, 嗜好
equation 名词	/ɪˈkweɪ.ʒən/	方程式, 方程
selfish 形容词	/ˈsɛlf.ɪʃ/	自私
confusion 名词	/kənˈfjuːʒən/	混亂 /混乱
adolescence 名词	/ˌædəˈlɛsəns/	青少年
alienate 动词	/ˈeɪ.li.ə.neɪt/	疏遠 /疏远
aspiration 名词	/ˌæspəˈɹeɪʃən/	希望
encompass 动词	/ɪnˈkʌmpəs/	包围
existential 形容词	/ˌɛɡzɪˈstɛnʃl̩/	存在性, 有關存在的 /有关存在的
inconvenient 形容词	/ˌɪn.kənˈviːni.ənt/	不方便, 不便

视频中出现的短语动词

单词	释义
figure out 动词	弄清楚
find out 动词	找出, 查明
get up 动词	起床
go through 动词	通過 /通过

值得反复跟读的句子

视频中简短而完整的句子，可以直接用在日常对话里：

I don't know what I'm living for.
I don't feel connected to it.
I don't want to follow a different path.

视频中的语法

说话人最常用的结构，并附上视频中的原话：

结构	视频中的用法
条件句 if + 从句，will/would + 动词 — 条件及其结果	if it was real I would see
现在完成时 have/has + 过去分词 — 过去发生但与现在仍有关联的事	I've spent · I've never thought · we've decided
被动语态 be + 过去分词 — 强调发生了什么，而不是谁做的	was forced · be worked · were forced

需要注意的发音

说话人用了 50 次缩略和弱读形式，例如 don't, I'm, can't。请按听到的简短形式来说。

“sh” 和 “zh” 音: unconditional /ˌʌnkənˈdɪʃənəl/, illusion /ɪˈl(j)uːʒ(ə)n/, equation /ɪˈkweɪ.ʒən/, selfish /ˈsɛlf.ɪʃ/, confusion /kənˈfjuːʒən/
长单词——注意重音位置: unconditional /ˌʌnkənˈdɪʃənəl/, adolescence /ˌædəˈlɛsəns/, alienate /ˈeɪ.li.ə.neɪt/, aspiration /ˌæspəˈɹeɪʃən/, inconvenient /ˌɪn.kənˈviːni.ənt/

中文母语者容易读错的音：

/v/ — 不要读成 /w/，上齿轻触下唇: veil /veɪl/, inconvenient /ˌɪn.kənˈviːni.ənt/, ventilation /ˌvɛntɪˈleɪʃ(ə)n/, violently /ˈvaɪ(ə)ləntli/, perceive /pɚˈsiv/
词尾辅音 — 要读清楚，后面不要加元音: oftentimes /ˈɔf.ənˌtaɪmz/, anyways /ˈɛn.iˌweɪz/, selfish /ˈsɛlf.ɪʃ/, accolade /ˈæk.əˌleɪd/, adolescence /ˌædəˈlɛsəns/
/æ/ — 嘴张大，不要读成 /e/: accolade /ˈæk.əˌleɪd/, adolescence /ˌædəˈlɛsəns/, aspiration /ˌæspəˈɹeɪʃən/, trance /tɹæns/, whammy /ˈ(h)wæmi/

如何用这段视频练习

先完整听一遍视频，不要开口，记下不认识的单词。
先用 0.75 倍速逐句跟读，熟练之后再回到正常速度。
录下自己的声音并与原声对比，特别注意 fundamentally, emptiness, overthink 这类单词。

什么是跟读法？

跟读法 (Shadowing) 是一种有科学依据的语言学习技巧，最初开发用于专业口译员的培训，并由多语言者Alexander Arguelles博士普及。这个方法简单而强大：您在听英语母语原声的同时立即大声重复——就像是一个延迟1-2秒紧跟说话者的影子。与被动听力或语法练习不同，跟读法强迫您的大脑和口腔肌肉同时处理并模仿真实的讲话模式。研究表明它能显着提高发音准确性，语调，节奏，连读，听力理解和口语流利度——使其成为雅思口语备考和真实英语交流最有效的方法之一。

影子跟读法: 阅读完整分步指南 →

跟读练习: I don’t understand what we’re living for - 通过视频学习英语口语

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