Pratique du Shadowing: How to Establish Connection: Use Stories to Make your Presence Authentic - Apprendre l'anglais à l'oral avec la vidéo

Have you ever had a boss or a leader of a group that you were in?

And this person, they said the right things, they did the right things, they were smart and capable, yet you still didn't feel pulled in by their leadership.

You weren't motivated.

Maybe you didn't even trust their leadership.

Why is that?

Most likely, it's a lack of connection.

An essential element of presence is how you can connect to other people.

We listen to people we connect with, people we relate to because we trust them.

There are a lot of ways to build trust.

We talked about eye contact, smiling, you can ask questions.

But in this video, we're going to talk about how you can use stories to increase your connection.

A true story often reveals a truth about someone, often a vulnerability that we're not perfect all the time.

And someone who shares the truth is worth listening to.

We're drawn in by it, and that's why it's a part of presence.

I like this equation.

Credibility plus openness equals connection.

Take for example, the COO of Facebook, Sheryl Sandberg.

Now, she's a highly credible, respected person.

She's very good at business.

In this clip, we're going to watch her tell a story in her TED talk, and you'll see this equation in play.

The saddest thing about all of this is that it's really hard to remember this, and I'm about to tell a story which is truly embarrassing for me, but I think important.

I gave this talk at Facebook not so long ago to about 100 employees.

And a couple hours later, there was a young woman who works there, sitting kind of outside my little desk, and she wanted to talk to me.

And I said, okay, and she sat down and we talked, and she said, I learned something today.

I learned that I need to keep my hand up.

I said, what do you mean?

She said, well, you're giving this talk, and then you said you're going to take two more questions, and I had my hand up with lots of other people, and then you took two more questions, two more questions and I put my hand down

and I noticed all the women put their hand down and then you took more questions.

Only from the men.

And I thought to myself, wow, if it's me who cares about this obviously, giving this talk, during this talk,

I can't even notice that the men's hands are still raised and the women's hands are still raised.

How good are we as managers of our companies

and our organizations at seeing that the men are reaching for opportunities more than women?

We've got to get women to sit at the table.

See what she did there?

Instead of lecturing us and saying it's really hard and you have to pay attention, she shared a story about how as the spokesperson of this topic, she didn't realize that she was doing it herself.

And she focuses on the ship, the lesson that she learns, because it revealed a vulnerability and it made us connect with her more.

Brilliant.

Okay, so what stories do you share?

How about that time that you got really drunk and passed out at a party?

No. You want to focus on stories that highlight qualities

that you want people to know about or a time that you learned a lesson.

This can be done when hiring a candidate.

Instead of telling the candidate, oh I love working here, share a story with them that shows why you love working there.

Maybe a time that your team solved a really complex problem and all came together.

Who knows, that story might really resonate with the person that you're trying to hire.

Interviewing.

Instead of listing off a bunch of accomplishments, share a story that shows how you got interested in the field, why you're passionate about this,

a story about a lesson that you learned in a past job or a project that you worked on.

Mentoring.

Share a story about a time you learned a lesson, something that you wish somebody would have told you when you were coming up the ranks.

Presentations.

Start off your presentation with a story.

If you're going to talk about a solution, start off with the pain of the problem and then contrast that with the relief of the solution.

Okay, so here's your homework for how create more connection.

Think of one of the scenarios that I mentioned that you need a story for and start to brainstorm it.

Write some notes about that story and then share it with a colleague or share it with a friend.

Get some practice rehearsing your story in a low-stakes situation.

Then you can take that story to your next high-stakes situation.

I hope that you realize by now

that presence is not one of those things that either you're born with or you're not.

You can improve your presence.

So try out these three things.

Focus on your composure, on sending the right cues, and connection and I really think you're going to see a difference.

Qu'est-ce que la technique du Shadowing ?

Le Shadowing est une technique d'apprentissage des langues fondée sur la science, développée à l'origine pour la formation des interprètes professionnels. Le principe est simple mais puissant : vous écoutez de l'anglais natif et le répétez immédiatement à voix haute — comme une ombre suivant le locuteur avec un décalage de 1 à 2 secondes. Les recherches montrent une amélioration significative de la précision de la prononciation, de l'intonation, du rythme, des liaisons, de la compréhension orale et de la fluidité.

Pratique du Shadowing: How to Establish Connection: Use Stories to Make your Presence Authentic - Apprendre l'anglais à l'oral avec la vidéo

Context & Background

Top 5 Phrases for Daily Communication

Step-by-step Shadowing Guide

Qu'est-ce que la technique du Shadowing ?