Pratique du Shadowing: Stop Over-Explaining: The 3 S’s Rule For Projecting Authority - Apprendre l'anglais à l'oral avec la vidéo
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You can be the smartest person in the room
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and still sound dumb and lose the room entirely because of the way you speak.
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And I should know because I have had it happen to me too.
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So today I am breaking down the speaking patterns that quietly sabotage us,
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especially high achievers from founders and CEOs to everyday humans just tired of not getting heard.
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And once you know these,
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you'll start noticing them everywhere.
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I'm Cody Sanchez and this is The Big Deal Podcast.
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This is how you get attention like a CEO.
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All right, let's go to trap number one, excessive hedging.
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People ignore everything you say before the word but.
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Did you know that?
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So if you say, I could be totally off here,
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but, and then you drop a perfectly solid point,
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neuroscience finds you're going to get ignored.
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And this is actually, there's a word for this.
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It's called linguistic hedging, and it's killing your competency score.
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So every single human immediately,
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when we meet another one,
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gets graded on two things, mainly warmth and competency.
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If you want to be listened to,
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you better be competent, even above being warm in the world of business.
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So the research on linguistic hedging shows that excessive qualifiers reduce perceived competence and authority,
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especially in high status environments.
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To say that in English,
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if you use, but I don't know,
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maybe, could be, I'm not sure,
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prepared to be pushed around like a ragdoll,
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even when the content quality of what you say is unchanged.
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So you could be saying really smart things,
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but you're going to be tossed.
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There's this classic persuasion finding where speakers who presented arguments confidently were rated as more credible.
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Okay, that kind of makes sense,
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even when their arguments were identical to more hesitant versions.
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But a really scary study,
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they did a follow-on study that showed people who argued more confidently
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but were wrong were rated even more credible than those who argued not confidently but were right.
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So confidence is actually a heuristic.
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People don't consciously score your logic.
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They score your certainty.
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So why do smart people do this then?
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Why do we hedge?
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Because you're aware of the complexity.
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You know, you and I both know reality is kind of probabilistic.
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And, you know, so we hedge.
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You don't want to sound like some sort of sycophant out there saying everyone should do this.
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You always do this.
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This never works because that's not realistic.
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But the problem, do you want to win or do you want to be right?
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And now here's some important nuance.
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Hedging isn't always bad, but it largely is.
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I mean, there's something called strategic hedging,
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which signals, hey, I'm intellectually honest,
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but most hedging you're doing is insecurity hedging,
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which signals I'm scared of being judged.
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You know, let's be honest.
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What are we usually doing?
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We're probably more scared of being judged than really strategically thinking about how to hedge.
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So let me show you the difference between the two.
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Let's say I say, I think we should move forward with point A.
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However, we have to take into account that there is a 30% failure rate.
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If we do that, that could be an issue.
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As opposed to, I want to move forward with point A,
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but you know, there's always a chance that it's not going to work.
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And I mean, I can't guarantee it 100%.
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Which one sounds more serious?
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Obviously, the first one.
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I gave numbers.
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I stated things as opposed to questioning things.
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So here's the test.
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Are you adding nuance for clarity or are you padding your statement to avoid social risk?
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Okay, so how do we fix this?
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How do we make you sound smart and people pay attention to you?
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Instead of saying, I might be wrong,
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but I think we should cut this feature.
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I want you to say,
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based on the data we have,
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cutting this feature is the right move.
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And if you want to be even better,
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say what the data is.
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Based on the data we have,
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we believe with a 70% probability,
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this is the right move.
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Give numbers and specifics.
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So this is the same thought,
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but just a slightly different posture.
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I want you to avoid excessive hedging because it's making people stop paying attention to you.
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Steve Job was famous for being the opposite of this.
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He'd have one sentence that tells you what to think.
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I call it his Twitter length headline.
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So he'd have one for the whole talk or product.
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So maybe like, today, Apple is going to reinvent the phone.
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This is the world's thinnest notebook,
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an entire library of songs in your pocket, right?
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Everything else was proof of that one line,
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one idea repeated, no hedging.
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The second trap is over-explaining.
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Smart people love clarity and they hate being misunderstood.
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So they explain, then they clarify,
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then they get an example,
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then they restate the example,
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then they summarize the summary.
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Yikes, what happens?
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You signal one of two things.
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Your audience is either slow or you think your idea can't stand on its own and neither is gonna help your credibility.
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There's nothing more infuriating to a competent person than having somebody over explain an idea they already got on the first sentence.
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So if you really want to piss off somebody with ADD,
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OCD, and high competence, then explain yourself a lot.
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I hate to say it,
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this isn't PC, but ladies,
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we do this more than men.
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And we have to work on it if we want to be taken seriously.
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There's actual real research in cognitive psychology that has identified something called processing fluency.
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So when something is easy to understand,
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people judge it as more truthful and more intelligent.
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So ironically, over-explaining actually reduces is your fluency.
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It makes simple things feel heavy.
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And you've seen this.
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Like someone explains a concept for five minutes and you think,
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what is this guy talking about?
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Like the idea could be good,
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but the delivery, well, that makes everything else get tossed out the window.
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So what's the fix?
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I want you to deliver the core idea concisely.
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Pause.
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Let silence do the work.
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If someone wants more depth, they'll ask.
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Authority ends up trusting the listener.
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So let me give you an example, two explanations.
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Low fluency.
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Our vertically integrated infrastructure leverages synergistic distribution pathways to optimize cross-sector capital allocation.
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Don't we all know somebody who talks like that, by the way?
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That's low fluency.
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High fluency.
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We buy boring businesses that make money.
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Which one sounds smarter?
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Actually, the second one.
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Which one feels more trustworthy?
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Number two.
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Which one gets remembered?
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Sure as hell, number two because smart people take complex things
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and make it simple and it's not about this cognitive load
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or using a bunch of vowels another fascinating study if
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if you look at stocks with easy names researchers found
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that companies with the easiest to pronounce names like car outperformed
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those with hard to pronounce names like rdo naming actually matters
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and in marketing this is really true this is why apple ads work so well think about them simple background minimal text,
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one product, clear headline.
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What do they do?
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That reduces your cognitive load.
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You don't have to think so hard.
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Your brain just goes, that makes sense and it must be premium.
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And it makes, you know,
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processing fluency basically makes simple look smart.
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And there's some dangerous sides to this.
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Like it can make bad ideas look good.
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That's why scams use simple language and conspiracy theories spread wildly.
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It's why charismatic leaders will win.
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We all know one, right?
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You know one right now who is not as smart as you,
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not as good as you,
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but often wins because they're smoother.
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And so how do you use this ethically?
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If you wanna sound more intelligent,
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we want shorter sentences, we want concrete nouns,
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no jargon, white space, speak slower, remove filter words.
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This is one of those ideas that quietly runs the world.
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So keep it stupid, simple.
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Trap three, talking too fast when it matters.
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Ever seen someone's pitch get higher?
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Their words speed up, their breath shortens, why?
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their nervous system is firing
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when we're anxious the sympathetic nervous system it activates that's like
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your heart rate rises breathing shifts speech accelerates listeners unconsciously interpret
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that speed as uncertainty even
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if actually you know what the fuck you're talking about you just talk fast like i do
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so studies on vocal perception show
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that slower lower paced speech is actually associated with higher status and greater credibility now you got to be careful here
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Because when you're talking to your boss,
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don't try to be profound.
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You want to make sure you are tied to the right timing.
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But when you rush your most important points,
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you subconsciously signal, I need to get through this before you reject it.
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What's the fix?
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When you reach your most important sentence, slow down by 20%.
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Add micropauses.
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Breathe before the key line.
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For example, instead of saying,
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so what I'm saying is we should pivot the whole strategy because the data is clearly showing diminishing returns.
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Try.
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I think we should pivot.
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The data is showing diminishing returns.
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You can make everything fast up until then,
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but when you've got your plane to land, land it.
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I want you to remember the three S's.
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Shorter, slower, stronger.
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They use this on us in advertising.
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Like, listen to the speed of this part of the Apple speech.
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Think different.
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Here's to the crazy ones.
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Here's to the crazy ones.
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The misfits.
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the rebels, the troublemakers, the round pegs in the square holes,
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the ones who see things differently.
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They're not fond of rules and they have no respect for the status quo.
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You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them.
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About the only thing you can't do is ignore them because they change things.
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they push the human race forward.
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While some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius.
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Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do.
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They basically relaunched Apple's brand around creativity and non-conformity,
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but done really cleanly, slowly, and strategically.
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Trap four, story, not specs.
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So I'm using Steve Jobs a lot in this because he's one of my favorite entrepreneurs,
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but also because he's one of the best of all time.
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And he is one of the best speakers ever,
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so we should steal his homework.
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And I think he followed a simple arc.
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Status quo to problem, to bold promise,
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to proof, to the future.
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So he would start with words like the world before,
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you know, phones are clunky, laptops are heavy.
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Then he'd raise the stakes to make a clear promise.
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But in the future, you will hold all of the songs in your pocket.
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Then he would show the solution live.
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Bam, show, don't tell.
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because people remember the story change, not the feature list.
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So you see, when you lead with ruthless simplicity,
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you can actually tell a story.
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Steed's slides and language were stripped down,
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few words on screen, big visuals, almost no bullets.
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I want you to think of short,
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concrete phrases instead of jargon, like, it just works.
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Or once on stage, he's just said, gorgeous.
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Because the story was simple,
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the audience, they had the bandwidth to feel it in their brain.
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One of my favorites on jobs was a speech that he gave on connecting dots at Stanford.
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And he has a couple lines I love.
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He's talking about when he does calligraphy and he learns computing
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and coding and he puts them together and he creates maybe the world's most valuable company.
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And he says, you have to trust in something,
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your gut, destiny, life, karma,
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whatever, because believing
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that the dots will connect down the road will give you the confidence to follow your heart even
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when it leads you off the well-worn path.
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That will make all the difference.
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Trap five, being a show-off.
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This one hurts because it's actually hard for me.
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It's really tempting to play it cool.
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You should actually be a show-off.
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The people who win in life are not the ones in the shadows.
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They are the ones who actually demonstrate what they do.
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I was just on a podcast with Bill Gurley,
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one of the best investors of all time,
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and he told me something fascinating about the founder of WeWork, Adam Newman.
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He said when he first met him in a series A,
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so the company basically had nothing in existence,
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his company benchmark had never done a real estate transaction.
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That's what this guy was asking him to do.
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But he goes, within the first few minutes,
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I knew I was going to invest in Adam and I was going to invest millions because he was such a showman.
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Think about who the president is right now,
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whether you like him or hate him.
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Donald Trump is a showman.
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Think about who's the richest man in the world right now,
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whether you like him or hate him.
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Elon Musk is a showman.
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So you actually need to flex.
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You know more than most people in the room.
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You've read the research.
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You understand the second order effects.
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You're smarter than you're giving yourself credit for.
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So flex it.
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I don't want you to reference obscure frameworks.
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I don't want you to add theoretical layers that aren't necessary because I want you to get recognized.
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But research on the illusion of explanatory depth and communication shows that the simpler you are,
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the more intelligent you are perceived.
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So the smartest communicators, they actually reduce complexity.
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They don't amplify it.
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Einstein supposedly said, if you can't explain it simply,
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you don't understand it well enough.
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Whether he said it or not, I think it's true.
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Smart, insecure speakers try to prove they're smart.
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Secure, smart speakers make everyone else feel smart.
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Think about that for a second.
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That's the power.
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So here's the fix.
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Go big and show, but default to the show being simple.
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Clarity beats cleverness every time.
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Trap six, obsessive rehearsal.
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Most people think great speakers are born with it.
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They are not.
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They are the ones willing to rehearse more than is reasonable.
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Psychologist Anders Ericsson spent decades studying world-class performers like violinists,
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chess players, athletes, surgeons, all of it.
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And his conclusion, and uncomfortable for everyone who likes the idea of quote-unquote talent,
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the main difference between the elite and the average wasn't who they were.
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It's how they practice.
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By age 20, the best violinist in his studies had put in more than 10,000 hours of focused practice.
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The merely good ones had about 4,000.
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Same instrument, same age, totally different outcomes.
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And later research really refined the picture.
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Practice isn't the only factor, like deliberate practice.
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That explains roughly one fifth to one quarter of the performance gap between pros and amateurs.
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In other words, if you line up a hundred people,
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a big part of why the top five look superhuman is they simply have done it more on purpose for longer.
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Public speaking, no different.
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Speaking well every day, no different.
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You know, the speakers who don't rehearse are the ones who ramble,
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run out of time,
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and have a voice in their head telling them that they're not saying the right things coming out of their mouth.
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The ones who run the talk out loud multiple times,
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well, they're calm and clear, baby.
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So when you watch someone who seems effortlessly good on stage,
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you're actually seeing something else entirely.
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Hours of practice, hours of cutting out weak examples,
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hours of practicing the pause after the key line
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so i don't want you to feel like you either have talent
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or you don't you can make it and
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if you want to see nobody better go look at steve
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jobs i mean one of the best speakers of all time but did you know
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he would say the natural delivery he engineered it people inside apple say he rehearsed keynotes allowed for hours
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and even was so specific down to fonts and demo beats.
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Because the material was internalized,
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he could look at people,
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move, and improvise around this sort of solid spine of his speeches.
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But, you know, the best shorthand for how he speaks
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and why he's heard is the fact that he practiced for a really long time.
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Trap seven, constant self-deprecation.
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This one is common among us high performers.
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You joke about being bad at things.
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You downplay wins.
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You undercut compliments.
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I know sometimes it feels humble and maybe sometimes it is,
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but overuse of this is nothing but self-sabotage.
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So research on impression management shows that strategic modesty works when balanced with being super competent.
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But the problem is chronic self-deprecation actually lowers your perceived ability,
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especially among people who don't know you yet.
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So there's actually a fabulous study on self-promotion versus modesty in job interviews.
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It's by Godfrey Jones and Lohr.
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And what they studied, the researchers wanted to test how different self-preservation strategies affect how people perceive you.
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Like does modesty increase likability, for instance?
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So how did they do it?
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The participants acted as evaluators in a mock hiring scenario.
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They watched videotaped job interviews where applicants use different communication strategies,
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self-promotion, ingratiation modesty, neutral controlled condition.
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The actors delivered identical qualifications, no different, right?
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Same resume, same background, same everything,
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except the style of delivery changed.
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After watching, evaluators rated the candidates on competence, likability, hireability.
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What do you think happened?
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Self-promotion, increased ratings of competence,
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intelligence, and recommendations for hiring.
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Slight decrease in likability, if too strong, but not that much.
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Ingratiation and modesty increased likability,
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but actually didn't increase competence,
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reduced perceived capability, and also reduced likelihood of them being referred for hire.
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The key insight, strategic self-promotion actually gets you hired.
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You being modest isn't helping anybody else but your competitors.
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And, you know, I really want you to think about this
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because a lot of times somebody will give you a compliment like,
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you did a great job.
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That was a great presentation.
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And you reply, honestly, I totally winged it.
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It was kind of a mess.
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You just rewrote their perception.
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Upgrade move, accept the praise.
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Thank you.
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That's it.
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You don't need to shrink to be likable.
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Confidence with warmth is magnetic.
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Insecurity disguised as humor, nothing but transparent.
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So the pattern behind all these traps,
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if we're going to zoom out,
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is fear of social rejection,
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being wrong, fear of being judged, not being liked.
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Smart people feel this more because you actually see all the complexity of this.
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Oh, to be a beautiful idiot, right?
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You know how much you don't know.
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And so here's the paradox.
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The people who win rooms aren't the ones who know the most.
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They're the ones who manage perception of others best.
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And perception is heavily influenced by delivery, not just content.
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It's not about pretending.
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It's not like the fake alpha energy.
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It's really about aligning to how you can get the outcome you want.
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Your job isn't to pre-defend against every possible criticism.
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It's to communicate clearly and let your ideas stand.
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And so I want you to ask yourself a couple questions.
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A simple speaking reset framework.
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Before important conversations, run this checklist.
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Am I hedging unnecessarily?
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Am I over-explaining?
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Am I rushing?
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Am I over-complicating?
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Am I landing statements confidently?
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Am I comfortable with silence?
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Pick one thing to improve per week.
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Don't try to fix everything at once.
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awareness alone is gonna upgrade you 15,
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20, 30% because practice actually will help you upgrade the rest.
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Most smart people are not held back because you're dumb.
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You're held back because how that intelligence is delivered.
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If you fix the delivery,
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suddenly the room treats you like the smartest person there because now you sound like it.
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So if you wanna outperform your peers in anything that involve words,
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there's a simple unfair advantage available to you.
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Rehearse more than they do and rehearse with intent.
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Run the talk through out loud,
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fix one thing each time.
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Do that obsessively and people will start calling you unnatural.
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That's it for today and next time you're in a meeting,
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listen for these traps.
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You're gonna hear them everywhere.
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And once you do, you'll come back here and we'll figure out your next step.
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Vocabulaire et conseils d’expression pour cette leçon
Cette leçon d’expression orale de niveau C1 s’appuie sur la vidéo « Stop Over-Explaining: The 3 S’s Rule For Projecting Authority ». Cette vidéo contient 415 phrases et 3471 mots à répéter en shadowing. La partie parlée dure 19:41. Le locuteur parle à un rythme naturel d’environ 176 mots par minute, proche d’une conversation courante. 82 % des mots font partie des 3 000 mots les plus courants en anglais ; le reste mérite d’être vu avant de commencer.
Vocabulaire clé de cette vidéo
Les 15 mots les plus avancés de la vidéo, avec leur prononciation et leur sens :
| Mot | Prononciation | Sens |
|---|---|---|
| hedge nom | /ˈhɛd͡ʒ/ | haie |
| modesty nom | /ˈmɒd.ə.sti/ | modestie |
| competence nom | /ˈkɑm.pə.təns/ | compétence |
| confidently adverbe | /ˈkɑnfɪdəntli/ | candidement, confidemment |
| likeability nom | amabilité | |
| rehearse verbe | /ɹɪˈhɝs/ | rabâcher, ressasser |
| perceive verbe | /pɚˈsiv/ | percevoir |
| showman nom | /ˈʃəʊ.mən/ | showman |
| clarity nom | /ˈklæɹ.ɪ.ti/ | clarté |
| competent adjectif | /ˈkɒmpətənt/ | compétent |
| complexity nom | /kəmˈplɛk.sɪ.ti/ | complexité |
| competency nom | /ˈkɑm.pə.tən.si/ | compétence |
| diminish verbe | /dɪˈmɪnɪʃ/ | réduire |
| fascinate verbe | /ˈfæsɪneɪt/ | fasciner |
| jargon nom | /ˈdʒɑː.ɡən/ | jargon |
Les verbes à particule que vous entendrez
| Mot | Prononciation | Sens |
|---|---|---|
| show off verbe | crâner, faire le malin | |
| break down verbe | tomber en panne | |
| come back verbe | revenir | |
| cut out verbe | arrêter de | |
| end up verbe | se terminer, se finir | |
| figure out verbe | cerner | |
| get through verbe | /ɡɛt ˈθɹu/ | franchir |
| slow down verbe | ralentir, décélérer |
Des phrases à répéter
Des phrases courtes et complètes de la vidéo, à réutiliser dans la conversation de tous les jours :
- What are we usually doing?
- Don't we all know somebody who talks like that, by the way?
- What do you think happened?
- Am I landing statements confidently?
- Am I comfortable with silence?
La grammaire de cette vidéo
Les structures que le locuteur utilise le plus, avec les mots exacts de la vidéo :
| Structure | Dans la vidéo |
|---|---|
| Voix passive be + participe passé — l’accent est mis sur ce qui arrive, pas sur qui le fait | be listened · be pushed · is unchanged |
| Propositions relatives who / which + proposition — une précision sur une personne ou une chose | people who argued · those who argued · somebody who talks |
| Present perfect have/has + participe passé — une action passée qui compte encore maintenant | have had · has identified · you've seen |
Prononciation à surveiller
Le locuteur utilise 74 contractions et formes réduites, comme don't, you're, I'm. Prononcez-les sous leur forme courte, telles que vous les entendez.
- Les sons « th »: warmth /wɔɹmθ/, theoretical /ˌθi.əˈɹɛt.ɪ.kəl/
- Les sons « sh » et « zh »: showman /ˈʃəʊ.mən/, deprecation /ˌdɛpɹɪˈkeɪʃən/, diminish /dɪˈmɪnɪʃ/, sabotage /ˈsæb.əˌtɑʒ/, preservation /ˌpɹɛz.əˈveɪ.ʃən/
- Mots longs — placez bien l’accent: confidently /ˈkɑnfɪdəntli/, complexity /kəmˈplɛk.sɪ.ti/, competency /ˈkɑm.pə.tən.si/, deprecation /ˌdɛpɹɪˈkeɪʃən/, credibility /kɹɛd.əˈbɪ.ɫɪ.ti/
Les sons difficiles pour les francophones :
- /h/ — il se souffle, il n’est pas muet: hedge /ˈhɛd͡ʒ/, rehearse /ɹɪˈhɝs/, headline /ˈhɛd.laɪn/, humour /ˈhjuːmɚ/
- /tʃ/ et /dʒ/ — à ne pas adoucir en « ch » et « j »: hedge /ˈhɛd͡ʒ/, jargon /ˈdʒɑː.ɡən/, researcher /ˈɹiˌsɝ.t͡ʃɚ/
- /r/ anglais — langue recourbée, sans frotter la gorge: rehearse /ɹɪˈhɝs/, clarity /ˈklæɹ.ɪ.ti/, deprecation /ˌdɛpɹɪˈkeɪʃən/, pronounce /pɹəˈnaʊns/, credible /ˈkɹɛdəbl̩/
Comment s’entraîner avec cette vidéo
- Écoutez la vidéo en entier une fois sans parler et notez les mots que vous ne connaissez pas.
- Commencez à la vitesse 0,75×, répétez phrase par phrase, puis revenez à la vitesse normale quand cela devient facile.
- Enregistrez-vous et comparez avec l’original, en faisant attention à des mots comme hedge, modesty, competence.
Qu'est-ce que la technique du Shadowing ?
Le Shadowing est une technique d'apprentissage des langues fondée sur la science, développée à l'origine pour la formation des interprètes professionnels. Le principe est simple mais puissant : vous écoutez de l'anglais natif et le répétez immédiatement à voix haute — comme une ombre suivant le locuteur avec un décalage de 1 à 2 secondes. Les recherches montrent une amélioration significative de la précision de la prononciation, de l'intonation, du rythme, des liaisons, de la compréhension orale et de la fluidité.