Shadowing Practice: how to talk to anyone - Learn English Speaking with Video
בחר מצב תרגול
כל מצב פותח חדר תרגול במסך מלא.
391 משפטים
אם המשפטים קצרים או ארוכים מדי, לחץ על ערוך כדי להתאים אותם.
1
I was at a coffee shop the other day,
2
waiting on my order, and I looked around and realized that every single person in the place was on their phone.
3
Every one of them.
4
The guy at the table by the window, the two girls sitting across from each other, the dude in line behind me,
5
and even the barista were either on their phone or had their AirPods in.
6
Nobody was looking at each other, nobody was present in the room that they were physically standing in,
7
and weirdly enough, the coffee shop was completely silent.
8
And it hit me that this is just how we exist now.
9
We occupy the same spaces as other people, but we aren't really there.
10
We're somewhere else entirely, living in the little screen in our hands while the real world happens around us.
11
And I think that this is why so many of us have lost our social skills.
12
We don't practice them anymore because we don't need to.
13
Every moment of boredom or discomfort
14
that used to force us to engage with the people around us now gets filled with scrolling.
15
Standing in line?
16
Phone waiting for a friend?
17
Phone.
18
Sitting in a waiting room?
19
Phone.
20
We've eliminated every single opportunity to interact with strangers, and then we wonder why talking to strangers feels so terrifying.
21
My whole life, up until college, I'd always had a fear of heights.
22
But one day, my friends wanted to go to a theme park,
23
and I didn't want to be the guy sitting on the bench holding everyone's bags like a grandma, so I got on a roller coaster.
24
And it was the first big roller coaster that I'd ever been on.
25
And I have to say, the first one was terrible.
26
My hands were extremely sweaty in line and I genuinely thought about bailing at least three or four times, but I did it.
27
And then, weirdly enough, I wanted to go again.
28
And the second time was still bad, but a little less bad.
29
And the third time was a little less bad than that.
30
And by the end of the day, my fear of heights wasn't cured, it didn't just disappear, but it got significantly better.
31
The physical reaction calmed down, the anxiety before the ride was shorter, and I could actually enjoy it.
32
It's still, to this day, not 100 % gone, and I still get uneasy going up to the top of a roller coaster,
33
but my fear got significantly better because I forced myself to do the thing
34
that scared me over and over again until my brain stopped treating it like a death sentence.
35
And a lot of us have social anxiety, but talking to people works the exact same way.
36
The reason it feels so hard is because we don't do it enough anymore.
37
Our brains treat it like a threat because it's unfamiliar and the less we do it, the more unfamiliar it becomes.
38
But if you start putting yourself in more social situations, even small ones, that anxiety starts to fade.
39
The first conversation with a stranger might feel like that first rollercoaster did for me, but the 20th, you won't even think about it.
40
The problem is, most of us aren't even getting on that ride to begin with.
41
I've been living in my city for about three years now
42
and my girlfriend
43
and I were talking the other night about how we haven't made a single new friend since we moved here.
44
Sure, we've met people, we've had surface -level conversations, but we haven't actually connected with anyone.
45
We go to the gym dozens of times per month and never said anything to people beyond pleasantries.
46
We would go out to eat and wouldn't talk to anyone around us.
47
We would attend events and didn't get people's names, and when we did, we never followed up, and honestly, I would probably forget it.
48
We were doing all of the things that put us in proximity to other humans, but we weren't actually engaging with any of them.
49
And then I had the audacity to bring up about how I haven't been able to make any new friends.
50
When I really sat with that, I realized that the issue isn't that people are unfriendly or that making friends is impossible.
51
The issue is that we've forgotten how to talk to each other.
52
When was the last time
53
that you went out of your way to have a longer than five second conversation with someone that you didn't already know?
54
Not a how's your day while you're both clearly in a rush, but an actual conversation where you slowed down and genuinely talked to someone.
55
For most of us, it's been way too long.
56
That realization reminded me of a book that I read back in college called How to Talk to Anyone by Lael Laundis.
57
I probably butchered that name, so Lael, if you're watching this, I apologize.
58
But it's one of those books that I remember thinking had some really practical ideas,
59
but I never actually put any of them into practice because I was 20 and that is lame.
60
But now, sitting here with not many local friends and a growing awareness that I'm the one who needs to change,
61
it felt like the right time to revisit it.
62
And honestly, going back through it as an adult hit different.
63
The stuff in this book is practical in a way that most social skills advice isn't,
64
and today I want to walk you through the things from it
65
that have actually changed the way I interact with other people.
66
Because the video is called How to Talk to Anyone, and I think by the end of it, you might actually believe that you can.
67
My name is Solace, and I make videos about personal growth
68
and navigating the chaos of modern life without all the toxic
69
or AI -generated nonsense that the rest of this space seems to love.
70
If you get value from this conversation, consider subscribing and checking out the discord in the description, and if you want to read this book,
71
you can find a link to it in my bookshop which is also in the description.
72
Now, let's get into it.
73
The first thing that Loundis talks about in the book, and the thing that stuck with me the most,
74
is that communication starts before you even open your mouth.
75
The way you carry yourself, the way you enter a room, the way you look at someone when they're talking to you,
76
all of this sends signals that people pick up on immediately, often without even realizing it.
77
And most of us are sending the wrong signals without knowing.
78
She has this concept called the flooding smile, and it's one of those things that sounds so small but genuinely changes how people perceive you.
79
When most people see someone they know or someone they want to talk to, they flash this little awkward minivan -driving soccer mom automatic smile.
80
You know, the one that you give to someone
81
when you walk past them in the grocery store and don't want to be awkward.
82
It's instant and it's polite, but it means almost nothing.
83
It's the social equivalent of a nod.
84
The person on the receiving end registers it as a formality because that's exactly what it is.
85
You didn't smile because you were happy to see them, you smiled because that's what you do when you make eye contact with someone.
86
The flooding smile is different.
87
Instead of immediately flashing that quick grin, you pause for a second when you see someone.
88
You look at their face, and then you let a warm, genuine smile slowly spread across yours.
89
It takes maybe one extra second, but the effect is completely different.
90
That small delay tells the other person that your smile is a reaction to them specifically, that you saw them, registered who they are,
91
and then felt happy enough to smile.
92
It makes people feel important, and it costs you literally nothing.
93
I've been trying to do this more often, and I feel like there's a notable difference in how people respond.
94
They light up more, and they're more likely to say something.
95
It's such a tiny adjustment, but it changes the entire energy of the first two seconds of an interaction.
96
And that leads into another thing that she talks about, which is what she calls the big baby pivot.
97
Think about how a baby reacts when they see someone they like.
98
They don't casually glance over with their arms crossed and half their body turned away.
99
They turn their entire body toward that person, light up, and give them their complete attention.
100
That's what babies naturally do, and it's incredibly warm and disarming.
101
Adults, to the exact opposite it.
102
We half turn, we keep one foot pointed towards the door, we look out over our shoulder instead of facing someone directly.
103
We check our phones mid -conversation and then wonder why the other person seems disengaged.
104
When someone's talking to you and you turn your full body toward them, square your shoulders, make eye contact, and give them your undivided attention,
105
it communicates something that words can't.
106
It says you matter to me right now, and in a world where everyone is half -present and distracted,
107
that kind of full attention is so rare that it stands out immediately.
108
People will feel it, even if they can't articulate what's different about you versus talking to someone else.
109
They'll just know that it felt good.
110
And that's going to be the core focal point of this video.
111
You need to show that you're interested in other people.
112
If you're going to socialize, do it with full commitment.
113
Don't just half -ass it and hope for the best.
114
There's no point in even doing that, and you're never going to connect with anyone.
115
And these two things alone, the flooding smile and the full -body pivot, have already changed the way that my personal small interactions go.
116
I'm able to treat people like a person instead of a transaction.
117
Eye contact, full attention, and a real smile, it's not that complicated.
118
The author of the book also talks about posture in a way that I find interesting.
119
She calls it hang by your teeth,
120
which is a visualization where you can imagine an invisible wire attached to your jaw pulling you up towards the ceiling.
121
The idea is that when you imagine this, your posture naturally straightens, your head lifts,
122
your shoulders go back, and you carry yourself with a quiet confidence that people respond to.
123
People make snap judgments about your confidence before you say a single word,
124
and something as small as how you hold yourself can make the difference between someone wanting to engage with you
125
and someone deciding to look the other way or ignore you.
126
But Lowndes goes way deeper than just body language and first impressions in this book.
127
The part of the book
128
that I think is most useful for people who struggle with conversation is her idea of being a word detective.
129
This is the concept that completely reframed how I think about talking to people.
130
The idea is simple.
131
When someone's talking to you, they are constantly dropping little clues about their interests, their passions, and the things that they care about.
132
Most of us miss these entirely because we aren't really listening.
133
We hear the words, sure, but we don't process them.
134
We're too busy thinking about what we're going to say next
135
or worrying about whether we look awkward or rehearsing some clever response in our head.
136
But if you actually listen for these clues and then follow up on them,
137
you can take any conversation from surface level to meaningful in about 30 seconds.
138
Here's what I mean.
139
If you ask someone what they do and they say, I'm in marketing, but honestly,
140
I've been spending most of my free time lately trying to learn how to surf.
141
Most people would latch onto the marketing thing because it's the obvious topic, but the clue is in the second half.
142
That's what they actually wanna talk about.
143
That's the thing that lights them up.
144
If you say, oh, that's cool.
145
How long have you been surfing?
146
Instead of, oh, nice, what kind of marketing do you do?
147
You just unlocked a version of that person that most people never see.
148
And when someone gets to talk about the thing they love, they associate that feeling of excitement with you
149
You become the person who let them talk about the thing
150
that they actually care about And that's how you stand out in someone's memory
151
This works in any conversation.
152
If someone says, yeah, it's been a crazy week, I just got back from visiting my sister in Colorado.
153
The clue isn't that they had a crazy week, the clue is Colorado and the sister.
154
Those are the doors that you can walk through.
155
Oh, nice, does she live out there?
156
Do you get to visit often?
157
Suddenly, you're having a real conversation about family and travel instead of a dead -in exchange about someone's busy schedule.
158
The clues are always there, you just have to train yourself to listen for them instead of using the time
159
while they're talking to think about what you're gonna say next.
160
And I'll be honest, this was probably the hardest adjustment for me.
161
I've spent most of my life so focused on not being awkward in conversations
162
that I was barely processing what the other person was saying.
163
I was just waiting for my turn to talk
164
or looking for the next safe topic to bring up so there wouldn't be an awkward silence.
165
But when I actually started listening, like really listening, I realized that people hand you the keys to a great conversation constantly,
166
you just have to take them.
167
Lowndes calls this keeping the swiveling spotlight on the other person.
168
The idea is that most people walk into a conversation with the spotlight on themselves.
169
They're thinking about how they're being perceived, what they should say, how they look, whether the other person likes them.
170
But if you take that spotlight and point it entirely at the other person,
171
if you make them the focus and give them the space to talk about themselves, something interesting happens.
172
They walk away from the conversation feeling great about it and they attribute that feeling to you.
173
You didn't have to be funny or charming or have the perfect story, you just had to be interested.
174
And I know some people are going to say, that's great, but what do I actually say when I walk up to someone?
175
Well, the book covers this too.
176
She has this concept that she calls never the naked city and never the naked job.
177
The idea that when you talk to someone and ask a basic question like, where are you from?
178
Or what do you do?
179
Most people give a bare one word answer, Ohio, marketing.
180
And then the conversation hits a wall because there's nothing for the other person to grab onto.
181
It's a dead end, and now someone has to think of a whole new topic to keep things going.
182
Instead, she says you should always wrap your answer in something that gives the other person a hook, something they can follow up on.
183
So if someone asks you where you're from, instead of saying Ohio, you might say, I'm from a small town in Ohio,
184
but I just moved here about three years ago because my girlfriend
185
and I wanted to try living somewhere with actual stuff to do.
186
Now, the other person has like four things they could respond to.
187
The small town, the move, the girlfriend, the city.
188
You've turned a dead -end answer into an open door, and it takes almost zero additional effort.
189
You're just adding a sentence of context.
190
Same thing with the job question.
191
If someone asks what you do and you say, I'm a video editor, that's a naked job.
192
There's nowhere for the conversation to go unless the other person happens to know something about video editing.
193
But if you say, I'm a freelance video editor,
194
I actually just quit my full -time job a little while ago to do it on my own, so it's been a wild ride.
195
Now, there's a story there.
196
There's something for the other person to latch on to.
197
They might ask about the freelance life or about what made you quit
198
or about what you did before or what type of videos you edit.
199
You've given them options, and the options keep the conversations alive.
200
But this works the other way too.
201
When someone gives you a naked answer, you can be the one who digs deeper.
202
If someone says, I'm from Ohio, instead of saying, oh cool, and watching the conversation die,
203
ask them what part or what made them leave or why do they live here now?
204
Do they miss it?
205
Don't just accept the surface.
206
Go one level deeper, and you'd be surprised how quickly people open up when you show genuine interest in what they're saying.
207
Most people give short answers because they assume the other person doesn't actually care.
208
When you prove them wrong by following up, it changes the whole dynamic.
209
Another thing from the book that I've been practicing is what Laundis calls parroting.
210
It sounds weird, but it's incredibly effective.
211
I'm not gonna lie, I don't like all the terms, it seems very self -help guru -y,
212
but I promise the stuff she actually says in this book makes a lot of sense.
213
The concept of parodying is when someone says something, you repeat the last few words back to them as a question.
214
Let's give an example.
215
If someone says, yeah, I've been really into rock climbing lately, you say, rock climbing, and they keep going.
216
They elaborate, they tell you more, they go deeper into the topic.
217
You didn't have to think of a clever follow -up question, you didn't have to steer the conversation anywhere,
218
you just echoed what they said and gave them permission to keep talking.
219
It feels almost too simple to work, but I've been doing it and it's kind of wild how much people will share
220
when you just give them a small nudge like that.
221
It keeps the conversations flowing without you having to carry it,
222
and it gives you more of a chance to find something to latch onto to continue the conversation.
223
And the other person feels heard because you're reflecting their words back to them.
224
Imagine someone says, yeah, I just got into woodworking, and you go, woodworking?
225
They're probably gonna talk for like five straight minutes about what table they were building, and I really don't know anything about woodworking,
226
but I think you get the point.
227
And this could happen just because you repeat one word back to them.
228
That's how low the bar is for standing out in a conversation in a world where nobody pays attention
229
People are so used to being half listened to
230
that even the smallest sign that you're paying attention makes a massive impression
231
Laundice also talks about what she calls prosaic with passion.
232
The idea is that when someone asks you a mundane question like how are you or how's your weekend going,
233
most people give a flat, boring answer.
234
Good, not bad.
235
And then the conversation goes nowhere because you've given it nowhere to go.
236
But if you respond with even a little bit of energy and specificity, like actually really good, I just found this awesome
237
Thai place near my apartment and I've been going back like three times per week.
238
You've just turned a throwaway question into the start of an actual conversation.
239
You've given the other person something to work with, and you've shown that you're someone who actually has things going on in their life.
240
It's a small shift, but it makes you instantly more interesting to talk to.
241
Now all of this stuff is great in theory, but it means nothing if you aren't in situations where you can actually use it.
242
And this is the part that I think connects everything together.
243
You could read every communication book on the planet, you could memorize every technique, you can watch a hundred videos about how to talk to people,
244
but if you're sitting in apartment with your phone in your hand, none of it matters.
245
You need to be physically present in environments where interaction is possible, and not just possible, but likely.
246
This is where my girlfriend and I sometimes go wrong when it comes to trying to make new friends.
247
We were going to places, but we were going to them wrong.
248
We went to restaurants and sat in our own bubbles in the corner.
249
We went to events and talked to each other.
250
We were physically in social spaces, but mentally closed off to any possibility of socializing.
251
If you want to meet people at a coffee shop sit at the community table, not in the corner facing the wall.
252
If you want to talk to someone at the gym, take your headphones out in between sets and actually look around.
253
Don't order a coffee to go and say you tried
254
or sit in the back row of a class and leave before anyone can talk to you and say you tried.
255
You need to put yourself in a position where connection is possible and then you need to actually be open to it.
256
And you need to go to places that you actually care about.
257
If you don't like drinking and you go to the bar because you think it's the best spot to meet people,
258
I'm sorry, but you're not going to connect with anyone
259
and you're not going to have a good time
260
and the people around you are going to be able to tell that you're not having a good time.
261
So seek out things that you're actually interested in and go to places that represent those things.
262
Nobody's going to think you're weird for showing up somewhere alone because that's the entire point.
263
You're going to a place for something you're passionate about and everyone else there is passionate about the same thing.
264
It doesn't matter how they arrived or who they arrived with.
265
That's your common ground right there and it makes starting a conversation so much easier because the hardest part, finding something to talk about,
266
is already taken care of.
267
Now, on the other side of this, the book also talks about a technique called eavesdrop in.
268
This one felt a little bold to me at first, but the more that I thought about it, the more it made sense.
269
The idea is that when you're in a social environment
270
and you overhear a nearby conversation about something you know about or are interested in, you can naturally join in.
271
Not in a creepy lurking way, but in a casual friendly way.
272
If two people next to you at the bar or talking about a show you've been watching, there's nothing wrong with saying,
273
sorry, I couldn't help put over here, but are you guys talking about that new season?
274
Most people are receptive to this because you've shown that you share an interest with them.
275
You've given yourself a natural way into the conversation without having to manufacture one from scratch.
276
It takes some guts the first few times, and sometimes people just aren't going to want to talk to you,
277
but it gets easier, like the roller coasters.
278
In the types of places where you can have these conversations, you need to keep showing up to them.
279
One visit to a coffee shop or one event is not going to change your social life.
280
You need reps.
281
You need to go to
282
that coffee shop regularly to become a familiar face to build recognition with the people who work there
283
and the regulars who also show up.
284
So showing up once and then saying, well, I tried does not count.
285
You dipped your toe in the water and then you went back to your couch.
286
When I look back at every friendship I've had in my life,
287
they all formed because I was consistently in the same place as the same people.
288
My childhood friends were kids on my street that I saw every day or kids that I played baseball with.
289
My college friends were people in my dorm or people in my classes.
290
Friendship is most easily based around convenience and the friendships didn't happen because of one great conversation.
291
They happened because we kept bumping into each other and eventually those surface level interactions deepened into something real.
292
The nod in the hallway turned into lunch together.
293
Lunch turned into hanging out on weekends.
294
That's how friendships have always formed, through proximity and repetition.
295
As adults, we don't have that built -in structure anymore, so we need to create it ourselves.
296
That's what showing up to the same places regularly does.
297
It recreates the proximity that friendships need to grow.
298
And honestly, this is where most people fail.
299
They go to one event, have an okay time, and then never go back.
300
Or they have a great conversation with someone, and then never follow up.
301
The follow -up is everything.
302
If you talk to someone and it goes well, exchange numbers.
303
Connect on Instagram.
304
Suggest getting together sometime.
305
I know that feels bold, and I know that the voice in your head is going to say that that they'll think this is weird,
306
but they won't.
307
People are hungry for connection right now, more than ever.
308
They're just as afraid to make the first move as you are.
309
Being the person who actually takes that step is rare, and most people will be genuinely happy that you did.
310
People are naturally drawn to faces that they recognize.
311
If you show up at the same place every week, the regulars start to notice you.
312
You stop being a stranger and start being the guy who's always here.
313
And that small shift in how someone perceives you makes it exponentially easier to start a conversation.
314
They're more open to it because you're not some random person approaching them out of nowhere, you're a familiar presence and familiarity breeds comfort.
315
Now I want to touch on one other thing that I think a lot of guys watching this need to hear.
316
A lot of the anxiety around talking to people gets amplified by about a thousand when it comes to talking to women.
317
And I get it.
318
I was the same way for most of my life.
319
I had crushes on girls in high school that I never spoke to.
320
Not once.
321
They probably still have no idea who I am to this day.
322
But women aren't some mythical creature that requires a secret code to communicate with.
323
They are normal humans, with normal interests, who want connection just as much as we do.
324
The reason that talking to them feels so different is
325
because you've attached an outcome to the interaction
326
you're not just talking to a person you're talking to someone you might be interested in
327
and the pressure of
328
that potential outcome makes
329
it feel like an audition every single technique from this book applies to talking to women the exact same way
330
that it applies to talking to anyone else the flooding smile
331
the full body pivot being a word detective keeping the spotlight
332
on them never giving naked answers none of this changes based on the gender
333
or how attracted you are to the person that you're talking to and that's kind of the whole point
334
If you want to get better at talking to women, get better at talking to anyone.
335
Talk to old ladies at the store.
336
Old people have no one to talk to, so if you just walk up to an old lady and say, hey, how are you doing today?
337
She's probably going to talk for like an hour and it'll give you a lot of practice.
338
Talk to anyone and everyone because it's the same skill, the same muscle.
339
You're just too in your head to see that right now because you've made talking to women into this separate, terrifying category when it's really not.
340
You wouldn't rehearse what you're going to say to the cashier at the grocery store.
341
You wouldn't stress about your body language when talking to an old man walking his dog.
342
But the second that you find someone attractive, you suddenly forget how to be a normal person, and they can feel that.
343
They can sense when someone is performing instead of being themselves, and it's uncomfortable for everyone involved.
344
The techniques from this book work precisely because they aren't about performing.
345
They're about being present, being curious, and making the other person feel like they matter.
346
That works on everyone because everyone wants to feel like they matter.
347
There's one more thing from the book that I want to mention
348
because I think it ties everything together and it's something that the author calls scramble therapy.
349
Again, these names are really giving me an ick
350
because I feel like a lot of self -help people prescribe these like weird names to things that don't really need it,
351
but the concept is that you should regularly try something new.
352
Get out of your comfort zone.
353
Try a new hobby, a new activity, a new place, a new type of event, not necessarily because you'll love it,
354
but because every new experience gives you something new to talk about.
355
It expands your world, it gives you stories, and it gives you a common ground with a wider range of people.
356
If the only thing you do is go to work and then go home and play
357
Xbox, you're going to have a very limited pool of things to talk about when you do find yourself in a conversation.
358
But if you tried rock climbing last weekend, or you went to a food festival, or you started learning how to cook a new cuisine,
359
suddenly you have material.
360
You have experiences that other people can relate to or ask questions about, and you have entry points into conversations that wouldn't have existed otherwise.
361
The other benefit of this is
362
that it puts you in new environments where you can meet different types of people that you normally wouldn't cross paths with.
363
If you only hang out in the same three places with the same routine, you're going to keep running into the same types of people.
364
But if you shake it up and try a new class or a new event, you're exposing yourself to a completely different set of humans,
365
and any one of them could become a friend.
366
You don't need to be naturally charismatic or outgoing to do any of this stuff.
367
That's the whole point of the book.
368
The author isn't writing for people who are already great at socializing.
369
She's writing for people like me and you who want to connect with others
370
but feel stuck because they don't know how to start.
371
A real smile instead of a fake one.
372
Full attention instead of half attention.
373
Listening instead of waiting to talk.
374
Asking about the things someone actually cares about instead of the thing that's the easiest to talk about.
375
None of this requires you to be extroverted or confident or funny.
376
It just requires you to pay attention to the world around you and care about the person in front of you.
377
If you're in the same place that I was, feeling a bit disconnected and struggling to make friends,
378
I really do encourage you to pick up the book.
379
Again, you can find it in my bookshop which is linked in the description, and everything purchased there helps to support local independent bookstores.
380
And if you want to support the channel directly, consider becoming a monthly member
381
or just buying me a coffee using the buy me a coffee link in the description as well.
382
I also have a habit tracking and journaling app
383
that is completely free to use with an optional one -time lifetime purchase package, which of course also helps to support the channel,
384
and it's a good place to build discipline and track your habits as well as your finances.
385
So, how is socializing with other people going for you?
386
Do you have any other tips?
387
Do you think I'm missing anything?
388
Let me know in the comments.
389
That's it for today's conversation and we will talk again soon.
390
Thank you.
391
Thank you.
הורד אפליקציה
כל מה שאתה צריך כדי לדבר בשטף
הגיית AIציון לכל משפט
תרגול IPAשלוט בכל צליל
אוצר מיליםבנה את מאגר המילים שלך
משחק אוצר מיליםלמד תוך כדי משחק
אותו ערוץ
FOR YOU
המלץ על סרטון
B133
35 משפטים
SEtalk: Why You Should Talk to Strangers
American AccentDaily ConversationUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
B24
105 משפטים
The Scary Reality of What Doomscrolling Does to Your Mind
Daily ConversationWorking Adults
B2456
24 משפטים
How Cell Phones Impact Our Relationships
Daily ConversationWorking Adults
B21
72 משפטים
Why Pilots Think Differently Than Everyone Else
Daily ConversationWorking Adults
B22
116 משפטים
The Fastest Way to Improve Your Communication
Daily ConversationWorking Adults
B13
57 משפטים
A Day Without the Internet #everydayenglish #digitaldetox #englishpodcast #learnenglish
Daily ConversationWorking Adults
B22
95 משפטים
A Simple Habit That (Sort of) Fixed My Social Skills for Good.
Daily ConversationWorking Adults
B21
371 משפטים
The cost of being understood, stop explaining yourself & face the discomfort of being misunderstood
Daily ConversationWorking Adults
B11
424 משפטים
Learn English with Podcast | Why You Shouldn't Quit English (Our Honest Story)
Daily ConversationWorking Adults
B22
226 משפטים
What years of extreme isolation have done to me
Daily ConversationWorking Adults
B11
120 משפטים
How to become someone everyone loves talking to
Daily ConversationWorking Adults
B149
32 משפטים
SEtalk: Stop Saying "I'm So Busy"
American AccentDaily ConversationUniversity StudentsWorking Adults
Vocabulary and speaking notes for this lesson
This speaking lesson is built on the video “how to talk to anyone”. This video has 391 sentences and 5499 words to shadow. The speech runs for 25:23. The speaker talks fast, about 217 words per minute, so expect linked and reduced sounds. 88% of the words are among the 3,000 most common in English, so the vocabulary is easy to follow.
Key vocabulary in this video
15 words from the video worth learning, with pronunciation and meaning:
| Word | Pronunciation | Meaning |
|---|---|---|
| clue noun | /kluː/ | Information which may lead one to a certain point or conclusion. |
| naturally adverb | /ˈnæt͡ʃ.(ə.)ɹə.li/ | In a natural manner. |
| naked adjective | /ˈneɪkɪd/ | Bare, not covered by clothing. |
| friendship noun | /ˈfɹɛn(d)ʃɪp/ | The condition of being friends. |
| connect verb | /kəˈnɛkt/ | To join (to another object): to attach, or to be intended to attach or capable of attaching, to another object. |
| awkward adjective | /ˈɔk.wɚd/ | Lacking dexterity in the use of the hands, or of instruments. |
| interaction noun | /ˌɪn.təˈɹæk.ʃən/ | The situation or occurrence in which two or more things act upon one another to produce an effect; the effect resulting from such a situation or occurrence. |
| topic noun | /ˈtɑpɪk/ | A subject; a theme; a category or general area of interest. |
| anxiety noun | /æŋˈzaɪ.əti/ | An unpleasant state of mental uneasiness, nervousness, apprehension and obsession or concern about some uncertain event. |
| nowhere adverb | /ˈnoʊ.(h)wɛɹ/ | In no place. |
| flood noun | /flʌd/ | An overflow of a large amount of water (usually disastrous) from a lake or other body of water due to excessive rainfall or other input of water. |
| genuinely adverb | /ˈd͡ʒɛn.ju.ɪn.li/ | In a genuine manner; truthfully, truly. |
| roller noun | /ˈɹoʊlɚ/ | Any rotating cylindrical device that is part of a machine, especially one used to apply or reduce pressure. |
| spotlight noun | /ˈspɒtˌlaɪt/ | A bright, directional light or lamp, especially one used to illuminate the focus or center of attention on a stage. |
| technique noun | /tɛkˈniːk/ | The practical aspects of a given art, occupation etc.; formal requirements. |
Phrasal verbs you will hear
| Word | Meaning |
|---|---|
| follow up verb | To take further actions remaining after an event; to continue, revisit, or persist; especially, to maintain communication or verify. |
| go back verb | To return to a place or state after having been there at a previous time. |
| show up verb | To appear, arrive, or attend, especially suddenly or erratically. |
| follow up on verb | To take further actions regarding (something). |
| light up verb | To illuminate, to bring light to something, to brighten. |
| look around verb | To inspect a building or area. |
| bring up verb | To mention. |
| calm down verb | To become less excited, intense, or angry. |
Sentences worth repeating
Short, complete lines from the video that you can reuse in everyday conversation:
- For most of us, it's been way too long.
- How long have you been surfing?
- Do you get to visit often?
- Do you have any other tips?
- Do you think I'm missing anything?
דקדוק בסרטון הזה
המבנים שהדובר משתמש בהם הכי הרבה, עם המילים המדויקות מהסרטון:
| מבנה | בסרטון |
|---|---|
| הווה מושלם ממושך (Present perfect continuous) have/has been + -ing — פעולה שהתחילה בעבר ועדיין נמשכת עכשיו | I've been living · I've been trying · I've been spending |
| הווה מושלם (Present perfect) have/has + past participle — פעולה שקרתה בעבר ועדיין יש לה חשיבות או השפעה עכשיו | have lost · We've eliminated · haven't made |
| משפטי זיקה (Relative clauses) who / which + clause — מידע נוסף על אדם או דבר | one who needs · bookshop which is · about, which is |
| סביל (Passive voice) be + past participle — הדגש הוא על מה שקורה, לא על מי שעושה את הפעולה | wasn't cured · is called · being perceived |
Pronunciation to watch
The speaker uses 145 contractions and reduced forms, such as you're, don't, you've. Say them the short way, as you hear them.
- The “sh” and “zh” sounds: friendship /ˈfɹɛn(d)ʃɪp/, interaction /ˌɪn.təˈɹæk.ʃən/, passionate /ˈpæʃənɪt/, rush /ɹʌʃ/, recognition /ˌɹɛkəɡˈnɪʃ(ə)n/
- Long words — get the stress right: naturally /ˈnæt͡ʃ.(ə.)ɹə.li/, interaction /ˌɪn.təˈɹæk.ʃən/, anxiety /æŋˈzaɪ.əti/, genuinely /ˈd͡ʒɛn.ju.ɪn.li/, proximity /pɹɒkˈsɪm.ɪ.ti/
How to practise with this video
- Listen to the whole video once without speaking and note the words you do not know.
- Start at 0.75× speed, shadow it sentence by sentence, then go back to normal speed once it feels easy.
- Record yourself and compare with the original, paying attention to words like clue, naturally, naked.
מהי טכניקת השאדואינג?
שאדואינג היא טכניקת למידת שפה מבוססת מדע שפותחה במקור להכשרת מתורגמנים מקצועיים ופופולרית על ידי הפוליגלוט ד"ר אלכסנדר ארגואלס. השיטה פשוטה אך עוצמתית: אתה מקשיב לאודיו באנגלית ילידית וחוזר עליו בקול רם מיד — כמו צל העוקב אחרי הדובר עם עיכוב של 1–2 שניות בלבד. בניגוד להאזנה פסיבית או תרגילי דקדוק, שאדואינג מכריח את המוח והשרירים בפה לעבד ולשחזר דפוסי דיבור אמיתיים בו זמנית. מחקרים מראים שזה משפר משמעותית את דיוק ההגייה, האינטונציה, הקצב, הדיבור המחובר, הבנת השמיעה ושטף הדיבור — מה שהופך אותו לאחת השיטות היעילות ביותר להכנה לIELTS Speaking ולתקשורת באנגלית בעולם האמיתי.