Shadowing Practice: What to do when someone makes you feel insecure - Learn English Speaking with Video
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185 משפטים
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Guys, so recently I was going through my DMs on Instagram
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and I received a DM from a girl that said to me, Hi Liz, my boyfriend and his parents are making me feel very insecure about myself.
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She said this is the lowest my self-confidence has ever been and the reason why she can't leave him
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is because her family lives very far away
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so she doesn't know what to do and she's very lonely and attached to this man.
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This video I will tell you what you can do
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when someone is trying to make you feel insecure about yourself
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this can be your parents friends relationship it does not matter hi guys my name is this
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and welcome back to my channel okay let's get into it
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first things first always look at what kind of insults is
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someone giving you this is such a fascinating subject to me
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because recently i actually got a lot of clarity on this
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because i was talking to my high school friend
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and my high school friend she used to be very very insecure especially about her appearance
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and she said you know when I was very insecure
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and I was kind of toxic in my own ways what
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I would do to make me feel better about myself is I would go to Instagram models
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or beautiful women and I would comment underneath their pictures like very nasty things about their appearance
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because she said it would make me feel better
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that they would go to bed that night seeing my comments
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and also feeling bad about themselves because obviously misery loves company
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and then she said to me that's why now i know
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because she she obviously she healed from this and she stopped doing this
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but she said now i know when someone comments something
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that is their own projection but
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when you just look at okay what are they actually saying
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to me are they insulting your intelligence are they insulting your
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looks are they insulting let's say your weight um your character
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whatever everything someone is insulting you about with no reason
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that is something that they're insecure about themselves
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when i was deep into my ed
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and my eating disorder in my head i used to judge people
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that were overweight because i was struggling with my own weight
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when i got out of my eating disorder i stopped doing
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that understand when someone says something to you they're just revealing how they feel about themselves.
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Another thing you should do is you should find yourself again.
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Know who you are, honey.
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Listen, when you know who you are, when you know who you are without this person, no one can shake
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or rock your boat your boat has to be stable first
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okay what his parents are saying what he's saying are all projections onto you
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but you have to be so stable
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that whatever comes whatever water comes in it cannot shake you someone cannot tell you hey you're purple
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when you know you're not purple okay
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so those insults will go one ear in other you're out
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when you know who you are what do you like do
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you love about yourself how do you treat yourself on a
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day-to-day basis uh what are your hobbies never allow anyone to talk down on you see the thing is
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when you from the first time allow someone to do
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that it will only get worse
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and worse down the line toxic people don't get nicer down
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the line they just see how far they can go the
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first time you show them okay i forgave you after you
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did this to me that's an in for them to get worse
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and worse so either you cut it from there
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and you're like okay get out get out enough like no
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there was no need to disrespect me i was good to you
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or you make them suffer and you make them learn their lesson
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so they never repeat it again
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when someone insults you give them a passive aggressive comment back
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if let's say his mother tells you oh you don't look good today
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or you're ugly whatever you should tell her uh thank you
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but you know i love to look at you
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and every day you just give me inspiration to feel confident
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because if you look like that and you can be confident
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that i can too fourth one makes you feel ugly
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and he says something you should say oh my god really you know what's
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so confusing to me though every time i send a picture
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of you to the group chat of my friends they just laugh at me
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and i don't understand what would they mean by
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that can can you explain to me why they laugh at your picture like they literally tell me always
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that you're so ugly but i i don't get it why do you think they say
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that either you're gonna do that your whole life be passive aggressive
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and act like a bimbo that you don't understand anything
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and just insult these people back
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or you start thinking like you know what these people are
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not worth my energy you should be lucky to breathe the
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same air as me honestly you guys are beneath me walk
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away honey walk away you will find much better than him
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okay he is the bare minimum he's under the bare minimum
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he's he's in hell this guy's in hell okay you can create heaven for yourself Why are you in hell with him?
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You don't belong there.
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Baby, you're too good.
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If someone has to insult you to bring you down, you're already above them.
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You're already above them.
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Why are they trying to bring you down?
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Look at the people you guys are surrounding yourself with.
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Look at the people you guys are constantly spending your time with.
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If these people don't grow you, if these people are not making you feel happy or good about yourself, why are you there?
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Why is your confidence so low that you accept shitty behavior from people
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that in one second will leave your life if you just close the door?
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You can say, hey, you know what?
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Get the fuck out of here.
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Bye.
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Bye.
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And close the door and never open it again.
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I'm so tired of us wasting our time because I'm honestly doing the same thing.
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I honestly was in the same boat as you Constantly forgiving Forgiving
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because I'm thinking Oh I'm lonely I don't have anyone I also don't live with my family
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So I only have this person But I'm not happy with this person
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But then I feel bad for them So I'm continuing a cycle
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that I don't like And I will end up in a cycle that I don't like Because when will Liz's life change?
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When Liz changes
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And nothing else
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And the same with you Your life will not change honey Nothing will happen I saw this quote
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that said we accept the love that we think we deserve.
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And it's again the same thing.
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Why do you think this is the best you can do?
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Why do you think that a person that disrespects you is the best you can do?
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Do you really think that low of yourself?
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I'm telling you, there's people that just believe they deserve the best and they get that.
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But you are doubting yourself.
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You're thinking I'm not good enough.
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And that's why you are left with crumbs of a person.
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I'm also saying it shouldn't be about him.
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It should be about you.
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What do you want?
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Is this what you want for yourself?
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Is this where your precious energy is going?
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Because honey, right now it's all fun and games.
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You're young.
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You're in your 20s.
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Oh, funny.
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But down the line, you'll be 60 stuck with this person if you don't leave now.
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And time goes very fast.
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People have spent years, years thinking, oh, I will be done one day and they won't.
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And some people don't make it out alive.
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It's all like, oh, till death do is a part.
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And then you don't come out of it alive.
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They should be blessed to sit in the same room as you.
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They should feel blessed to breathe the same air as you.
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And you're letting people sit there and talk down on you?
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Hello?
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Hello?
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Value yourself.
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Protect yourself.
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No one is going to do that for you.
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When you have a partner, when you have a friend, when even your parents, they should make you feel like you're the king and queen on earth.
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They should like hype you up.
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They should be like, you're amazing.
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You're beautiful.
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That's how people should talk to each other
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if they don't there's no benefit honey you will always keep either in the same position
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or he will drag you down sometimes you have to look at some people
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and you have to be like you know what i'm too
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pretty to accept your behavior i'm too pretty for this you
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have to stop telling people oh i will leave i will do this oh
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that no just leave shut up create your exit plan and leave
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okay don't tell anything
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because these people they don't believe you first of all they'll never take you serious
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because you've always always threatened that before and you never do it
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so this time just keep your mouth shut okay
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and start creating an exit plan think okay how can i
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make money how can i save up money to live on my own how can i make friends
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so i feel less lonely
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so i have at least a community around me can i find other women
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that also have been in an abusive relationship
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that i can find a community in that start thinking these things
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and slowly slowly you're just moving out and then one day he comes home
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and all of your stuff is gone me a toxic person
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will not miss you they will just find another victim that's it
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because that's what you are to them a victim honey you
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have to understand not everyone you lose is a loss a lot of times it's a gain
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if i look at the people that i had in my life i'm very happy that all of them are gone
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because that's what that was not meant for me anymore
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and at that time it was it was what I needed it was
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when I needed to grow and I needed to learn
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but right now I'm in a state where I just grown
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so much I don't resonate with those people anymore
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and that's okay it wasn't a loss it was a lesson
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and I'm grateful for those lessons and I'm grateful for the time
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that I had with them even if it was bad it I learned something
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and I moved on with my life and you should do the same thing
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don't look at it as how could i have stayed i feel
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so dumb blah blah no honey there was a lesson there we learned through relationships we learned through these things and
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when you've learned your lesson you're also supposed to move on
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you shouldn't linger there you shouldn't linger where there's no respect just know
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that you're the queen on earth and you can get anything you want
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if you set your mind to it
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and you know this you literally know this okay don't waste your time on people
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that are not worth to be around you they're not worthy of you okay
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if you have pure intentions and
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if you have a good heart you deserve people with the same intentions
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and with the same heart anyways i love you guys
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so much and yeah i hope you guys learned something i hope this helped
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and yeah i love you guys so much and i see you next video bye
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אוצר מילים והערות הגייה לשיעור הזה
שיעור הדיבור הזה ברמה B1 מבוסס על הסרטון “What to do when someone makes you feel insecure”. בסרטון הזה יש 185 משפטים ו-2030 מילים לתרגול Shadowing. הדיבור נמשך 10:08. הדובר מדבר מהר, כ-200 מילים בדקה, אז צפו לצלילים מחוברים ומקוצרים. 89% מהמילים נמצאות בין 3,000 המילים הנפוצות ביותר באנגלית, כך שקל לעקוב אחרי אוצר המילים.
אוצר מילים מרכזי בסרטון הזה
15 המילים המתקדמות ביותר בסרטון, עם ההגייה והמשמעות שלהן:
| מילה | הגייה | משמעות |
|---|---|---|
| insult שם עצם | /ɪnˈsʌlt/ | עלבון |
| toxic שם תואר | /ˈtɒk.sɪk/ | רעיל |
| lonely שם תואר | /ˈloʊnli/ | גַּלְמוּד |
| forgive פועל | /fɚˈɡɪv/ | סָלַח |
| linger פועל | /ˈlɪŋɡɚ/ | הִתְמַהְמֵהַּ, הִתְעַכֵּב |
| projection שם עצם | /pɹəˈd͡ʒɛkʃən/ | בְּלִיטָה, בֶּלֶט |
| breathe פועל | /bɹiːð/ | נָשַׁם |
| disorder שם עצם | /dɪsˈɔɹdɚ/ | אי־סדר |
| purple שם עצם | /ˈpɝ.pl̩/ | סגול |
| aggressive שם תואר | /əˈɡɹɛs.ɪv/ | מתגרה |
| shake פועל | /ˈʃeɪk/ | זִעְזֵעַ, נִיעֵר |
| confuse פועל | /kənˈfjuːz/ | בלבל |
| overweight שם תואר | /ˌoʊvɚˈweɪt/ | בעל משקל עודף, שמן |
| attach פועל | /əˈtæt͡ʃ/ | חיבר |
| misery שם עצם | /ˈmɪz(ə)ɹi/ | אומללות |
Phrasal verbs שתשמעו
| מילה | הגייה | משמעות |
|---|---|---|
| shut up | /ʃʌt ʌp/ | שתוק, סתום |
משפטים שכדאי לחזור עליהם
משפטים קצרים ושלמים מהסרטון שאפשר להשתמש בהם בשיחה יומיומית:
- Why are they trying to bring you down?
- You can say, hey, you know what?
- Do you really think that low of yourself?
- Is this what you want for yourself?
- Is this where your precious energy is going?
דקדוק בסרטון הזה
המבנים שהדובר משתמש בהם הכי הרבה, עם המילים המדויקות מהסרטון:
| מבנה | בסרטון |
|---|---|
| “Used to” used to + verb — הרגל או מצב שהיה נכון בעבר וכבר לא קיים | used to be · used to judge |
| הווה מושלם (Present perfect) have/has + past participle — פעולה שקרתה בעבר ועדיין יש לה חשיבות או השפעה עכשיו | has ever been · have spent · you've always always threatened |
| סביל (Passive voice) be + past participle — הדגש הוא על מה שקורה, לא על מי שעושה את הפעולה | are left · will be done · should be blessed |
| עצה עם “should” should + verb — לומר מה כדאי או מומלץ לעשות | should do · should tell · should say |
הגייה ששווה לשים לב אליה
הדובר משתמש ב-70 קיצורים וצורות מקוצרות, כמו don't, you're, I'm. אמרו אותם בצורה הקצרה, כפי שאתם שומעים אותם.
- הצלילים של “th”: breathe /bɹiːð/, threaten /ˈθɹɛt.n̩/, underneath /ˌʌndɚˈniθ/, beneath /bɪˈniːθ/, worthy /ˈwɝ.ði/
- הצלילים של “sh” ו-“zh”: projection /pɹəˈd͡ʒɛkʃən/, intentions /ɪnˈtɛnʃənz/, shake /ˈʃeɪk/
צלילים שדוברי עברית מתקשים בהם:
- /w/ — שפתיים מעוגלות, לא /v/: overweight /ˌoʊvɚˈweɪt/, anyways /ˈɛn.iˌweɪz/, worthy /ˈwɝ.ði/
- /æ/ — פתוח יותר מה-“אֶ” העברית, לא כמו “a” ב-“cup”: passive /ˈpæs.ɪv/, fascinate /ˈfæsɪneɪt/, attach /əˈtæt͡ʃ/, clarity /ˈklæɹ.ɪ.ti/, nasty /ˈnæs.ti/
- /r/ — הלשון לא נוגעת בשום מקום, לא ה-“ר” הגרונית: insecure /ɪnsəˈkjʊɹ/, disrespect /dɪsɹɪˈspɛkt/, projection /pɹəˈd͡ʒɛkʃən/, breathe /bɹiːð/, disorder /dɪsˈɔɹdɚ/
איך לתרגל עם הסרטון הזה
- הקשיבו לכל הסרטון פעם אחת בלי לדבר, ורשמו את המילים שאתם לא מכירים.
- התחילו במהירות 0.75×, תרגלו Shadowing משפט אחר משפט, וחזרו למהירות רגילה כשזה מרגיש קל.
- הקליטו את עצמכם והשוו למקור, תוך תשומת לב למילים כמו insult, toxic, lonely.
מהי טכניקת השאדואינג?
שאדואינג היא טכניקת למידת שפה מבוססת מדע שפותחה במקור להכשרת מתורגמנים מקצועיים ופופולרית על ידי הפוליגלוט ד"ר אלכסנדר ארגואלס. השיטה פשוטה אך עוצמתית: אתה מקשיב לאודיו באנגלית ילידית וחוזר עליו בקול רם מיד — כמו צל העוקב אחרי הדובר עם עיכוב של 1–2 שניות בלבד. בניגוד להאזנה פסיבית או תרגילי דקדוק, שאדואינג מכריח את המוח והשרירים בפה לעבד ולשחזר דפוסי דיבור אמיתיים בו זמנית. מחקרים מראים שזה משפר משמעותית את דיוק ההגייה, האינטונציה, הקצב, הדיבור המחובר, הבנת השמיעה ושטף הדיבור — מה שהופך אותו לאחת השיטות היעילות ביותר להכנה לIELTS Speaking ולתקשורת באנגלית בעולם האמיתי.